For Laughs - Funniest Thing You've Heard Aboard?

[BurgerBits]

Just for grins...

 

What's the funniest thing you've heard/seen aboard a cruise ship? You can name the ship and dates if you like, or leave them out 'to protect the unwitting,' as it may be :).

 

Multiple posts are encouraged as you recall or are reminded of something else, too!

 

Here's something that happened to DH and I aboard the Crystal Serenity in 2004:

 

We boarded an elevator with a very elderly couple. When the doors closed, the gentleman turned to me and said (imagine a gravelly, WC Fields-style voice): "Honey, you were MARvelous last night!! Those are some amazing moves you've got!" DH raised his eyebrows, glanced at the man and then at me, and said, "Really? Didn't know you'd left the cabin...??"

 

Turns out he thought I was one of the performers on the ship... :o

[CruisingChick]

There's one thing that comes to my mind when you posted this - and it happened TWICE on two different cruises (lines and ships).

 

Okay - our very first cruise was on the Big Red Boat 2 New England/Canada - when we pulled in to St. John's, NB they had a gentleman dressed up as a Loyalist - he was ringing a bell and greeting the ship to everyone that was outside on the decks as we were docking. Well, my husband, son and I started to laugh because - someone next to us says - "Oh look George Washington is greeting the ship." We laughed about that the rest of the cruise because a Loyalist was the farthest thing from George Washington you could get.

 

On our very next cruise in 2001 which was out of NYC to New England/Canada - we again stopped in St. John's. We were out on deck and sure enough Mr. Loyalist is there ringing his bell greeting the ship. When to our amazement again someone next to us says - Oh look there's George Washington. It was too funny. At least to us and our tablemates it was.

 

If you don't know what a Loyalist is go back and study your American Revolution History.

[RealDeal]

This happened on a Princess Alaska cruise. We had been in Skagway that day, but had been back on the ship for a few hours. We were in one of the lounges on board and an extremely drunk woman at the bar turns to me and says, "What ship are YOU on?" Guess she thought she was still in port! OMG....

[Tinwoman]

We were on Azamara transatlantic, and the Capetian and his staff often ate in the buffet on board.

He had just had dinner with us and his staff and was leaving, someone a couple of tables over stopped him and asked for a refill on their drink.

He got the funniest look on his face for just a second, and then went and had their drink refilled and delivered it himself.

They were never the wiser, but we and the other crew still at the table rolled with laughter.:D

[paulred]

In the 1770s and 1780s over 50,000 people left the original 13 colonies and came to Canada because they were loyal to the Crown. As many or more went back to England or the Continent. This does not include the many thousands who did not agree with the revolutionaries, but stayed put for economic reasons. This out of a total population of 3.5 million.

 

They say that winners get to name the wars, hence you have the Revolutionary War, but in truth it can equally be seen as the first American civil war.

 

On the other hand, we descendents of Loyalist are happy that things worked out for you.

 

Paul

[Norcal Cruiser]

We were in an elevator on the Infinity in Alaska and one woman turned to another and asked so are you on vacation?We thought that was pretty funny. Another cruise we were on our balcony just before start of the lifeboat drill and heard the very loud lady next door yell Honey hide the booze this is when the crew steals it.Unbelievable!

[BurgerBits]

As many or more went back to England or the Continent.

Paul

 

Uh, okay... so did anything funny happen on their way back across the pond? :D :D :D

[piratelooksat45]

Well we didn't "hear" this, but "read" it. On one of our last cruises (not sure if it was Holland or Celebrity) one of the paid services was for Accupuncture. They were promoting the service by stressing the healing/wellness effects of accupuncture. One day as we walked by the room where the accupuncture was to be performed a sign was posted stating (you guessed it) -- "Appointments for the day are cancelled due to sickness."

[jeffreytg]

In the 1770s and 1780s over 50,000 people left the original 13 colonies and came to Canada because they were loyal to the Crown. As many or more went back to England or the Continent. This does not include the many thousands who did not agree with the revolutionaries, but stayed put for economic reasons. This out of a total population of 3.5 million.

 

They say that winners get to name the wars, hence you have the Revolutionary War, but in truth it can equally be seen as the first American civil war.

 

On the other hand, we descendents of Loyalist are happy that things worked out for you.

 

Paul

 

And the Civil War was the 2nd American Revolutionary War (a sector of the population attempting to seperate from a government that they did not agree with). But, the bad guys won, hence the name Civil War.

[ScubesDad]

In March 2008 DW and I had two very funny encounters.

 

The first evening of the cruise being open seating for dinner we chose to go to the main seating rather than the late seating as we usually do, as we had an issue with delayed luggage that we wanted to follow up on before the ship sailed. Upon entering the dining room and being escorted to our table DW stops in the middle of the dining room and starts to talk to a couple. The lady seated at the table had the oddest expression on her face until she realized who we were: it was my cousin and her husband, who live on the east coast of Canada - neither of us was aware we were sailing on the same cruise. It goes without saying we had a wonderful week.

 

The second incident happened a few days later in St Martin; we were finishing up an excursion and were in the market and I hear someone calling my DW name - her name is not uncommon, so I basically ignored it. The tour leader chased me down and advised me DW was talking to somone who apparently knows her. Turns out it was a co-worker who was spending the week in St Martin with her family. She heard DW's distinctive laugh and knew immediately who it was.

 

For the rest of the trip we were waiting for the third encounter, as these things always happen in threes.

[CathyCruises]

This was on Summit in November. For starters, obviously, my name is Cathy.

 

Big mix up on seating the first night at dinner, and we ended up alone at a table set for 7. Finally two older ladies joined us. The first one sat down and said, "Hi, my name is Betty." I misunderstood her, and asked "Millie?" She promptly replied to me, "Oh, hi Millie! This is my friend Ethel!"

 

DH was in stitches and could hardly catch his breath to explain the mixup--but rest assured he called me "Little Millie" for the rest of the trip.

 

Never did see Betty and Ethel again--except at the art auctions!

 

LM

[Twosox]

We were on the Millenium and one of our friends was complaining that there was a really odd squealy noise on their deck (probably the lowest deck)

 

When we met for dinner one night I told her she must count her blessings as I was with a couple in the lift who told me their cabing door fell off...I thought this was really funny and tried so hard not to laugh as I was telling them not to worry as I once had a car which lost it's door and that was far more dangerous.

 

Poor old Millenium it really wasn't her fault..We thoroughly enjoyed her, but sometimes these things just happen

 

Linda

[Blue Lagoon]

We were on a Med cruise onboard the Galaxy and one of the excursions was a visit to the last home of Mary, Jesus' mother. This was in Turkey (Ephesus) and the excursion was arranged thru Celebrity. Boarding the bus, we discovered on our seats, a goody bag. Inside were items such as a pen, a sanitizer wipe, and a bead that depicted the 'evil eye'. But, the piece de resistance was a statue of Mary made of soap! Our tablemates were also Catholic and in disbelief that were were being encouraged to wash our bodies with a religious icon!?!?:eek:

[amapola]

On the Adventure a couple of years ago, shortly after boarding we were standing at the railing overlooking the Promenade, a couple of floors up from it. A woman standing next to us said to her friend "It doesn't look like there are 15,000 people here."

 

The second happened this month, not on the ship but in Grenada (do shorex count?) the tour guide was pointing out various plants and trees as we drove by them. At one point he slowed down and said (picture this in that West Indian lilt) "We call this banana. BA-NA-NA. Banana." DH said maybe he used to work for Sesame Street. Every time we went by some bananas it was the same thing. Banana. BA-NA-NA. Banana. :p

[Windy56]

Uh, okay... so did anything funny happen on their way back across the pond? :D :D :D

 

LOL...very good comeback, BB!!!!

[Rainmn]

Funniest thing heard - hmmmmm-

 

The oft-repeated morning recorded announcement played at Freedom's pool deck stating that there will be absolutely no saving of pool deck chairs.:)

[Bibi]

This happened on a Princess Alaska cruise. We had been in Skagway that day, but had been back on the ship for a few hours. We were in one of the lounges on board and an extremely drunk woman at the bar turns to me and says, "What ship are YOU on?" Guess she thought she was still in port! OMG....

 

OMG is right! I'm still laughing.......:D

[jimgev]

This happened on a Princess Alaska cruise. We had been in Skagway that day, but had been back on the ship for a few hours. We were in one of the lounges on board and an extremely drunk woman at the bar turns to me and says, "What ship are YOU on?" Guess she thought she was still in port! OMG....

It would have been great if someone had told her that she was on the wrong ship and see her reaction. LOL

Hmmm, Fair Lawn - I grew up next door in Glen Rock.

[CanWeGoYet?]

On talent show night, an older gentleman singing "Old Man River" in an extreme bass, serious and dramatic delivery (think lion man singing "if I was king of the forest). I shook I was trying so hard not to laugh.

[kannna]

During captain midday announcment on our south america cruise " I would like to thank the lovely lady by the pool for the nice tip for getting her a towel this morning" (In his lovely Greek accent of course)

[greydog]

I was in the Lido buffet for lunch and heard a woman at a nearby table of four adults say

 

"This ship must have as at least as many decks below the waterline as above in order for it to not capsize."

[Texed]

I made the mistake of wearing a "Cruise Critic" t-shirt. People came up to me telling me the things on the ship they were unhappy about. I went along with it, and I acted like I wrote down their complaints. :rolleyes:

[BOB AND PINKIE]

Walking on a Carribean island with DW, and bumping into a neighbor walking hand in hand with "his niece" . Later learned that he had told his wife that he was there on business.

[usha]

I was cruising on Century with my younger daughter Corey right after she graduated from college. We were in deck chairs in the vicinity of two elderly gentlemen who were deep in a loud conversation about things they should have brought.

One man bemoaned that he should have brought his binoculars.

The other griped that he should have brought his big brimmed baseball cap.

The first voiced his regret that he should have brought his windbreaker.

The second was thinking he should have brought his bigger sunglasses.

The list of forgotten items went on for quite some time, when the first gentleman finally cried out:

"Well, H3LL, for all the things we shoulda' brought, we shoulda' brought a G-- D--- semi trailer!!!"

My daughter had a really tough time acting like she didn't hear that!:o

[RSGS315]

We were in an elevator with other people on a South America cruise, when an elderly lady said to her friend, "when are we crossing the equator"? A young man in the elevator said to her, "we did this an hour ago, didn't you feel the bump?" and the lady said, "No, I must have been in the shower".