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Pet Peeve - "I've never . . . but"

niborHS

By niborHS,
in Holland America Line

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babyher

babyher

Posted
Posted

Has anyone ever brought a neon sign on board with them? Would you put that in your checked luggage or in your carryon?

 

Its just an old Budweiser sign with a team of Clydesdales that I'd like to use as a cabin door decoration.

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babyher

babyher

Posted
Posted
We are not settling anything here until Dutch By Association posts with the OFFICIAL word from Seattle on HAL policy.

 

THEN we can use up 7 pages asking each other "Why this policy, when XYZ would be soooo much more logical ?"

 

Which will get the inevitable responses explaining the "Profitability" of certain Light Bulbs vs. Whale Oil Lamps.

 

Which will elicit a photo circa 1952 from pipedreams.

 

Then usha will "Bravo" his post (with a "Mole" reference as well)

 

Provoking bepsf to remind us what happened on the inaugural of the Exotodam in Whositsgrad, Nambia.

 

Of course Ruth will have to agree "Yes, that WAS fun, wasn't it"

 

Hammybee will explain that on the Nextdam they will have self-changing light bulbs, but probably only in the DR at first.

 

Half of the subsequent posts will let everyone know what a terrible and fatal decision has been made.

 

The other half will state emphatically how well this change has worked on RCCL and/or Princess

 

Now it's about time for the poster who has to let us know what her TA from Duluth definitively said on the subject.

 

Copper will remind us that the boys in blue always have and always will change their own bulbs. It's an American Tradition

 

Boytjie will inform us that these Self-Changing "Lamps" are actually made in Brooklyn.

 

Someone will ask if with the new lighting will they still have to dress formal for lunch in the Lido on port days. (and do they still have to tip the same if they only have popcorn) {or bread pudding} <and would it be considered rude to carry their trays to the 9:00 PM show on the Boulderdam 37 day Galapagos sailing if they sat "discretely in the back">

 

A new poster will reference this link instructing us all to put it in the proper perspective:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_RgL2MKfWTo&feature=related

 

After 16 pages of this : I will finally ask if any of you have ever actually "Seen The Light ? "

.

 

 

Suite passengers will complain that on their last cruise there was no more tray with an assortment of lights bulbs in the Neptune Lounge like there always has been.

 

And that not one of the ships electricians made an appearance at the Suite Luncheon .

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babyher

babyher

Posted
Posted
Does anyone know if they sell lightbulbs in the shops on ship or do you have to bring your own? Is there a wattage fee if you bring them to the dining room?

 

 

If you ask them for a lamp in the dining room to put the bulb in there is a wattage fee.

 

I just take a lamp from my cabin and bring that to the DR. No one ever says anything . EVERYBODY DOES IT. *LOL*

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Copper10-8 "Live from...." Rare

Copper10-8

Posted
Posted

Q: How many women with PMS does it take to change a light bulb?

A: One. Only ONE!! And do you know WHY it only takes ONE? Because no one else in this house knows HOW to change a light bulb. They don't even know the bulb is BURNED OUT. They would sit in this house in the dark for THREE DAYS before they figured it OUT. And once they figured it out they wouldn't be able to find the light bulbs despite the fact that they've been in the SAME CUPBOARD for the past SEVENTEEN YEARS. But

if they did, by some miracle, actually find the light bulbs, TWO DAYS LATER the chair that they dragged from two rooms over to stand on to change the STUPID light bulb would STILL BE IN THE SAME SPOT!! AND UNDERNEATH IT WOULD BE THE CRUMPLED WRAPPER THE STUPID @*!#$% LIGHT

BULBS CAME IN! WHY?! BECAUSE NO ONE IN THIS HOUSE EVER CARRIES OUT THE GARBAGE!! IT'S A WONDER WE HAVEN'T ALL SUFFOCATED FROM THE PILES

OF GARBAGE THAT ARE 12 FEET DEEP THROUGHOUT THE ENTIRE HOUSE. THE HOUSE!! IT WOULD TAKE AN ARMY TO CLEAN THIS... I'm sorry...what did you ask me?

Q: How many divorce lawyers does it take to change a lightbulb?

A: 3 - one to argue for the rights of the old lightbulb, one to argue

for the rights of the new lightbulb, and one to argue for the rights of the light socket

 

 

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HALFans

HALFans

Posted
Posted
Brian, you forgot about the 1 person who is going to post that some sleazy lawyer was going to sue because the electrocution of the 2nd husband's first wife is definitely the fault of the cruise line.

 

I wasn't going to post on this thread, but there's just so much mis-information here I feel compelled to say something.

 

I've had over 4,500,296,212 light bulbs in my life, and only two of them were any good. They were both hand made by Thomas Alva Edison and were passed down through generations in my family, since we came over on the Mayflowerdam in 1207.

 

I can tell you about some light bulbs! And if you prop the veranda door open they don't smoke as much when you put your wet dinner napkins on them to dry before packing them in your suitcase.

 

Watt? Sorry, I have to go.

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Copper10-8 "Live from...." Rare

Copper10-8

Posted
Posted

Q: How many lawyers does it take to change a light bulb?

A: Such number as may be deemed necessary to perform the stated task in a timely and efficient manner within the strictures of the following agreement:

 

Whereas the party of the first part, also known as "The Lawyer", and the party of the second part, also known as "The Light Bulb", do hereby and forthwith agree to a transaction wherein the party of the second part (Light Bulb) shall be removed from the current position as a result of failure to perform previously agreed upon duties, i.e., the lighting, elucidation, and otherwise illumination of the area ranging from the front (north) door, through the entry way, terminating at an area just inside the primary living area, demarcated by the beginning of the carpet, any spillover illumination being at the option of the party of the second part (Light Bulb) and not required by the aforementioned agreement between the parties. The aforementioned removal transaction shall include, but not be limited to, the following steps:

 

1.) The party of the first part (Lawyer) shall, with or without elevation at his option, by means of a chair, stepstool, ladder or any other means of elevation, grasp the party of the second part (Light Bulb) and rotate the party of the second part (Light Bulb) in a counter-clockwise direction, said direction being non-negotiable. Said grasping and rotation of the party of the second part (Light Bulb) shall be undertaken by the party of the first part (Lawyer) with every possible caution by the party of the first part (Lawyer) to maintain the structural integrity of the party of the second part (Light Bulb), notwithstanding the aforementioned failure of the party of the second part (Light Bulb) to perform the aforementioned customary and agreed upon duties. The foregoing notwithstanding, however, both parties stipulate that structural failure of the party of the second part (Light Bulb) may be incidental to the aforementioned failure to perform and in such case the party of the first part (Lawyer) shall be held blameless for such structural failure insofar as this agreement is concerned so long as the non-negotiable directional codicil (counter-clockwise) is observed by the party of the first part (Lawyer) throughout.

 

2.) Upon reaching a point where the party of the second part (Light Bulb) becomes separated from the party of the third part ("Receptacle"), the party of the first part (Lawyer) shall have the option of disposing of the party of the second part (Light Bulb) in a manner consistent with all applicable state, local and federal statutes.

 

3.) Once separation and disposal have been achieved, the party of the first part (Lawyer) shall have the option of beginning installation of the party of the fourth part("New Light Bulb"). This installation shall occur in a manner consistent with the reverse of the procedures described in step one of this selfsame document, being careful to note that the rotation should occur in a clockwise direction, said direction also being non-negotiable.

 

NOTE: The above described steps may be performed, at the option of the party of the first part (Lawyer), by said party of the first part (Lawyer), by his heirs and assigns, or by any and all persons authorized by him to do so, the objective being to produce a level of illumination in the immediate vicinity of the aforementioned front (north) door consistent with maximization of ingress and revenue for the party of the fifth part, also known as "The Firm".

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