Emergencies: Death of a family member at home

[NKsDogWalker]

My Memere (grandmother) had been sick for year and we knew her time was coming. When I arrived in Florida (where my parents live and where I stayed a few days before the cruise) Memere was close to the end of her time. I debated not going but we didn't know when it was going to happen so my mom told me "Go and have a good time if something happens we will let you know." I did everything I could beforehand to make sure my folks could get a hold of me onboard. Memere passed away while I was driving down to Miami. Since my family is from New England we all needed to make arrangements to fly back to New Hampshire for the funeral. My mom made all the arrangements and called the ship and left a message at the desk. When I got back to my cabin (hours later) there was a message on my phone to call the desk. I actually went up there to get the message. Nothing had been written down all that I was told was who called and when they called. I actually had to call my mom back (thankfully Carnival picked up the changes) and get all the info about the flight arrangements from my mom. Apparently she had left a lengthy message with the desk. Carnival allowed whomever I was driving back to Orlando with to disembark in the very first group. Since I didn't need to be back in Orlando until 3 we were able to check our baggage and be off the ship in no time.

There are alot of things I would do different. First I would have had all the phone numbers I needed written down on a piece of paper instead of all stored on my blackberry which I didn't want to turn on for fear I would get charged an outrageous fee. Second I would have made sure to leave info with the desk letting them know the situation. I had called Carnival and the charter company I worked with and let them know everything but I am not sure if anything got written down. I am not sure what difference it would have made but at least I would have had alittle more piece-of-mind. Last I would have made sure any fees that needed to be paid were put on my account or at least I was made aware of them. My mom was charged $35 for the phone call to the ship. No one had let me know this was going to happen in an emergency. Mom didn't let me know this happened until I arrived in Orlando.

Everything turned out fine and we made it back to New Hampshire for the wake and funeral with no delay. I think Memere had something to do with that. Sometimes life has a weird way of working things out. This was only my second cruise. Unlike many of you I am certainly not even close to a veteran.

[cb at sea]

In the cruise info and documents, there should have been something about the phone charges for contacting the ship....I don't know of any cruiseline that doesn't charge a lot for that...usually in the $7-8 per minute range.

[sail7seas]

Sorry for the loss of your grandmother and particularly that you were cruising when she passed.

 

As to the ship being responsible to take and pass along a lengthy message from your mother, I don't see that as their responsibility. They did you a courtesy IMO to take the message that your mother had called and passed that along. Particularly in this day and age of easy communication with all our devices, your family could easily have communicated without involvement of ship taking any lengthy messages. You comment you had a blackberry so you were reachable. IMO

 

There are thousands of people on these ships and I don't see it reasonable to expect secretarial like services from Front Offices on ships.

 

[Mary Ellen]

I'm sorry for your loss.

 

I'm appalled that the ship let your mother run up a phone bill (IIRC $16/min) while she left a lengthy message. If they weren't going to pass it along, this was totally unnecessary. The shipboard person should have said they couldn't take a message, but would let you know that they would let you know that she had called and when. If they let her leave a long message, they should deliver that message. IMO entirely reasonable.

[sail7seas]

I'm sorry for your loss.

 

I'm appalled that the ship let your mother run up a phone bill (IIRC $16/min) while she left a lengthy message. If they weren't going to pass it along, this was totally unnecessary. The shipboard person should have said they couldn't take a message, but would let you know that they would let you know that she had called and when. If they let her leave a long message, they should deliver that message. IMO entirely reasonable.

 

 

Appalled when we weren't there listening?

We have no idea if the person taking the message didn't try to indicate they could not pass along the whole message but Mom in her distress wanted to tell her the whole story.

 

We cannot know first hand as the story is being passed second and third hand.

 

IMO, name and number and degree of urgency, time and date of call, is all that one should expect from a message taker at front office on a cruise ship.

 

It is not the place of the 'message taker' to stress about the size of Mom's bill. That information was available to the guest prior to cruising. OP knew of the possibility of the sad death and could have arranged in advance how notification could be made the most economically if that was an issue.

[fischymom]

Just wanted to say how sorry I am to hear about lossing your grandmother. Drama is the last thing needed at this point. Blessings to you and your family

[aohkay]

IMO, name and number and degree of urgency, time and date of call, is all that one should expect from a message taker at front office on a cruise ship.

 

In my opinion, this is the way telephone calls should be handled for *all* types of situations.

 

To the OP, I'm sorry for your loss.

[paul929207]

OP, sorry for your loss.

[cruiseco]

The couple of times I've had to contact a passenger I've faxed the message and had it delivered to the cabin. Always has worked just fine.

[cherylandtk]

I am sorry for the loss of your Memere, and thank you for taking the time to post your experience for others to learn from. A couple of other thoughts...email is more accurate and cheaper than a phone message that may not get fully delivered, do leave emergency numbers with family (numbers and costs are in the information emails and the website) for basic messages i.e. "call home", phone rates vary so it is important to know both internatial cell rates and ship to shore rates upfront, and it is important to know how to set a smartphone to turn data and other features off and still be able to make phone calls or pick up messages while traveling.

[dsrdsrdsr]

Having phone numbers written down is a very sensible option for two reasons. Not just the enormous bills, but also in case the your mobile breaks down, you lose the charger, or it disappears over the side.

[NKsDogWalker]

I didn't really post this as a debate I just wanted to use myself as an example. Things can happen that are beyond our control. When I called Carnival and the charter company neither one of them let me know of the changes for the call (I expected there would be some but they would be changed to me not my mother). It is a lesson learned and I will make sure it doesn't happen again. I did give my mother the option of e-mail me the info but she called me. Since it was her mother that passed away I think she wanted to actually talk to me.

 

Thank you for all the kind words. :) I am looking forward to cruising again in June. Hopefully everything will go smoothly this year.