Anyone taken a 1 year old on a port intensive Med cruise? (please share thoughts)

[luvtheships]

Question...are you sharing a cabin with them? If not, then it really doesn't matter if the baby sleeps at night or not.

 

Also, while I am a fan of both ships and private tours...I think in your situation, taking the ship tours is actually preferable. Especially since the babe is their responsibility and not yours, by doing the ship tours you will be able to fully enjoy the port experience.

 

While some may say that private would be better with the baby and that may be so for the parents, but as for you, private would be a real issue should they back out due to the fussy baby that day.

 

As I posted earlier, while they may be good friends of yours and I am sure the baby is precious, I would really try to ignore the baby issue and not get involved with caring for the baby. Just let them trudge through it on their own because since they feel it is doable..they must mean that they can do it on their own without any help or babysitting from anyone else they are cruising with.

 

I think you get my drift.:)

[TMLAalum]

Another issue about traveling with a baby is that they become the focus instead of the sights. As a grandmother, I loved the babyhoods of my grandsons, but the pace of traveling with them was as slow as when we took my DH's elderly parents to DisneyWorld.

 

Do you have to hang with your friends the entire cruise? The impression I have from some of your posts is that you'll be sharing in the responsibilities of babycare to help them. You must be a really good friend!

[room010]

Your friends are new to parenthood and if they haven't done much travelling with their baby I think they are being unrealistic (naive) about the practicalities of dragging a young child on any cruise, let alone the one you have in mind. Going on vacation together is often the quickest way to lose a friendship. Add a demanding baby into the mix and I can see tears before bedtime, especially if you are expected to share the child care. I know this isn't what you want to hear but I think you know deep down that this has the potential to turn into a total disaster.

[marazul]

I'll just have to make my own plans and plan for the best. my reservation with planning private tours with them is that if they would back out for any reason I'll be left in a bind. With ship tours I will be able to do the excursions one way or another.

 

 

NalCruiser - Price the private tours just for your family. You may find out that they are cheaper than the ship's tours and cover more ground. If your friends join you fine, that reduces the cost. If they drop out, you may not be paying any more that you would in a ship's tour. Ask for quotes for your family only and for your family + friends.

 

Probably, the safest bet would be for you to do private tours and for your friends to do ship's tours. That way neither will be penalized by cost or inconvenience. You do not have to be with them every moment. There will be plenty of opportunity to be together onboard and compare notes of your excursions.

 

I always prepare an email detailing what I want to see at each port and send it (separately of course) to several tour operators. Then the quotes I get are for the exact same same tour. Use the description of the ship's tours as a base. You may find that they offer several half-day tours that could easily be combined in a private full-day tour at a much lesser cost (for example, Pompeii and Herculaneum). Or that a few places could be added to a ship's full-day tour because you do not have to have shopping stops or bathroom stops for 60 people in your private tour.

[bunnyette]

1) Sit down with your friends and have a good frank discussion about expectations (i.e. are you expected to help with child care). Ensure they are ok with you going off without them sometimes.

2) Start researching and drafting an itinerary. Rome is very easy to get to from the port - a train ride and you are there. Maybe some of you go to the Vatican museum and baby goes off to a park...there are some nice ones in Rome.

3) Have the friends take a look at the itinerary. If they are the type who are happy to stroll and stop in a park - they might be ok.

4) Schedule each day - with kids you do need to do that.

5) You will find locals are lovely with children. You might even get special attention with baby in tow.

6) Look into childcare on the ship. On a med cruise a few years ago, one of my tourmates left her 6 year old daughter on board as she really wanted to enjoy seeing Ephesus without a naughty child acting up. Her daughter had a great time on board and Mom had a fabulous day.

7) Make your friends research - after all they are the ones travelling with the child.

[numbersix]

...and this is a good thing for the 1-year old baby....why?

 

 

You asked for opinions, so here's mine:

 

I think it's an incredibly bad idea. It sounds to me that this is 'all about them...and their baby'...so where does this leave you? It sounds to me (amateur psychologist that I am;)) that this trip is all about them and you are along for support, possible babysitting, to take the pressure off them, to provide a distraction when needed, et cetera. Step back a bit and take a really hard, honest look at the whole thing.

 

I can't wait for the evening where you're babysitting in the cabin while they're dining the night away in the fancy alternative restaurant:rolleyes:.

 

Unless you (or they) are very old, or very ill, or with, for some reason, a diminished expected life span, you shouldn't (IMHO) look upon this as a 'once in a lifetime opportunity'...you must assume that you will go to Europe...when it suits you....and on your terms....for now, save your money.

 

Keep the dream!

[maryann ns]

I think this will be a frustrating and expensive waste of time for you. Bad idea!

[aohkay]

of course, I can't tell my friends not to go or anything.

 

No, you can't tell your friends what to do or what not to do. It's their trip, their money and their child. However, since they asked you to ask around the boards, simply send them this link.

 

They are going to go, without or without. You should now be thinking if you want to spend $10,000 - $12,000 on a trip to the Med that you might not enjoy - or might enjoy less due to traveling with a 1 year old.

 

No one can tell you whether you should or shouldn't. But, if I was in your shoes, I would definitely not go with them.

 

I don't particularly enjoy traveling with my kids - and they're 24 & 26. :D

[NalCruiser]

I definitely don't have illusions of traveling with a little one, even though I adore them.

my friends didn't "ask" me to ask for them per se. I was planning a trip to Europe already when they were suddenly hit with very ideal conditions to go because tickets to fly there (which is a big chunk of the cost) would be paid for by employer - so naturally they got excited to plan a trip all together. Which DOES sound exciting of course, except I started researching more on all the things one would want to do in ports of call and more and more started wondering how possible/easy is that with a 1 year old.

They are VERY positive and feel that it will not affect the trip a whole lot. I'm definitely the more skeptical one although politely so, and figure I'll just continue with trying to make my own plans. I'll be happy to know what it's like with a little one to be realistic of how that affects the trip cause I certainly don't plan to fly over there just to spend half my time baby sitting for them or anything. I can offer to do that while we are here at home without a million sights to knock out in one day :)

[room010]

Seems you are determined to go despite the majority view here that it's not a good idea so Bon Voyage, good luck staying sane and keeping your friendship intact and I'll be thinking of you ;)

[luvtheships]

oh so now it is a bit clearer...they decided that they want to come with you because you were already planning the trip?

 

I am so sorry that this happened to you..regardless of how much you like them, the simple fact is that:

 

1. You have never been to Europe before..want to see lots of stuff...rightly so.

 

2. You spoke a little too enthusuastically about the trip in front of them..a big no no in my book...and look what happened.

 

I am still waiting for the answer to this? Do they expect you to babysit? Have you told them in no uncertain terms that you will not be babysitting? Have you also told them you will not alter you plans in the ports for them?

 

 

While I think it is OK for them to travel to Europe..just the 3 of them..cruise..do a land trip..whatever..on their dime or their bosses dime...doesn't really matter..take the kid or not....again doesn't matter because if they are just going the 3 of them...they will be fine...survive it all..and actually enjoy themselves...because it isd their baby and I am sure that just like every single parent of a 1 year old would do...they will adjust their day to suit the baby...

 

however, it is incredibly selfish of them to try to squeeze in on your trip...but as you say you can't tell them not to come...but seriously...just dont do anything for them...dont book their cruise...help select their cabin...tours...do nothing..nada..zilch...

 

if you must..and they pester you..ok go ahead and tell them what cruise YOU have decided to go on...but by all means don't ask their opinion of which ship to take or what ports to visit...

 

I only say this because you posted that you were ALREADY planning a cruise...and then they..the incredibly selfish ones...just butted in and said they were coming...and bring a 1 year old.

 

If you want to remain friends with them for the long term...stay evasive...either that..or tell them how totally uncomfortable and scared you are to have the baby along...and when I say scared...relate it to the possible ruination of a wonderful friendship.

[marazul]

If they do come, set the rules:

1. You will spend port days on your own: sightseeing, tours, etc Tell them they are better of planning their own tours at their own pace and you will plan yours

2. When on board, you'll be happy to get together, but may dine on your own if the venue you want is not suitable for kids

3. You will not babysit or stay with them in the evening if you want to see a show, etc.

[NalCruiser]

all the points have been very well taken and actually invaluable.

I came on here to ask about realistic thoughts/experiences with such a trip with one so young and this is exactly what I was looking for - meaning the truth.

 

room010, its not the case that I am determined to go against what the majority are saying - don't get me wrong, if I were able to go without having my friends come along, at this point for sure, that would be ideal. But like people have said, I cannot tell them not to go. I have already tried politely bringing up points about the reality of what things might be like, but as everyone knows you really don't want to say too much to parents who just might dig their heels in the ground when they even remotely suspect that you are saying anything negative within a 1000 mile radius of their child.

 

So no, I'm not being stubborn by trying to go "despite" what people have said. Yes I wanted to go on this trip forever and am finally in a position to do it - I don't want to NOT go because my friends are going. But as some have suggested I will just try to plan things on my own and not to try to tie myself with them too closely.

 

luvtheships, there has not been any formal discussion on responsibilities on taking care of the baby at all, their whole thought was more in the vein of "Hey, it would be awesome to go together!" But I would certainly NOT want to be in the position when already there and asked, hey could you look after junior for a minute while we do A, B or C. Like you said, I am not going to involve them in any decisions and such and hopefully that will establish an expectation from the get-go.

Yes I was excited at first to think they might get to go with us (maybe a mistake), but its a knee jerk reaction when your friends tell you they might be able to go with you on a fun trip. How else can you really react without looking like you don't like to be around them? Which truly I DO! I just don't necessarily think a cruise to see Europe is best suited for the family situation, and especially after reading all the posts here.

There have of course been some people who have said they did it, loved it and it was no big deal - it seems that noone who has actually done it here so far has a horror story to share per se. So for all I know they may go ahead with this and all will be great and so on. But I'll try to just make my own plans either way and be clear that the primary focus of going will not be to take care of the baby for them in the least.

 

I know people travel with their little ones everywhere, and I read on one of the posts on these boards that the intensity is no different from doing Disneyworld. I do think that Disney and a european cruise have one huge difference though - while the level of energy involved might be the same, typically people go to Disney BECAUSE of their child - so the focus IS on the child and on being in an environment that is stimulating FOR the child. So the focus is on the child/children to begin with. With Europe I can't imagine how any child under the age of 8 or even more might truly appreciate it. I'm sure a child would rather be riding Dumbo any day than starting at Roman ruins. So yes, of course the trip is all about the parents until then.

 

I actually think a great situation for those whose young kids can go to kids clubs would be to go with them and to have them there while the parents/adults go sightseeing. That way you are not away from them, but also not dragging them on excursions that are really not suited for young kids. Of course I'm sure there will be parents everywhere that disagree with me.

[aohkay]

it seems that noone who has actually done it here so far has a horror story to share per se.

 

Yes, but most of, if not all of the responders have children, so that does give us a bit of the edge here.

 

And, perhaps because none of the responders has actually done what you are propsing, speaks volumes.

 

Good luck.

[room010]

@ OP - Thanks for clarifying how you find yourself in this unenviable situation. Now we know that your friends more or less invited themselves along I envy you even less. As others have said, you need to have a serious discussion with them and say that having thought it through using your head (and CC!) instead of your heart there are a few ground rules that will need to be followed if this plan is going to have any chance of success. The child's needs must come first and either they are being selfish or clueless about the possible impact those needs will have on the enjoyment of all of you.

 

Unless they are very understanding you risk losing their friendship now when you tell them your concerns, or you'll lose the friendship anyway if the baby severely cramps your style on the cruise of a lifetime. Good luck.

[marylizcat]

My feeling is that this could be the end of a beautiful friendship! You will end up resenting them because you didn't get to do everything you wanted to.

 

Have you considered a Disney Cruise? They have excellent nurseries for babies.

[Annie Morehead]

Please do not do this cruise with them!!!! You never really know what someone is like until you travel with them. I would find a reason (of some sort) to back out of this cruise....and then quietly book another one later on. Let them go on without you all.

[maryann ns]

The only way I would even think of doing this would be to put it in writing that you will not babysit, that you will go on your own excursions much of the time, and you will want to spend many of your dinner times without them.

[Annie Morehead]

http://www.cruisecritic.com/blog/index.php/2012/05/29/9-reasons-not-to-take-a-baby-on-a-cruise/

[Karysa]

http://www.cruisecritic.com/blog/index.php/2012/05/29/9-reasons-not-to-take-a-baby-on-a-cruise/

 

 

The writer pointed out the obvious. Did she really think that she was going to have late nights at the disco or pack carry-ons? Most people who decide to take a one year on a cruise do research like the OP here. I can't believe that this blogger did not realize that her cabin would be a little cramped with a crib in it. These are the people who should not be bringing babies on a ship but many other families manage quite nicely because they have changed their expectations. Personally I would feel that I was missing out on things that I enjoyed so it would not be something that I would choose to do.

[Suzieanna]

When it is your baby you are much more inclined to put up with the stuff that comes with the territory such as carrying prams up stairs in train stations cos there is no lift or being stuck in your room every night cos baby needs a sleep. That's okay when it's your baby so they could cope admirable........... But this isn't your baby and will affect your vacation massively in good and bad ways!

 

I personally think this has disaster written all over it. Are you two couples and a baby or one couple, a baby and you? I can't remember and my iPad won't let me go back to page one.

[chipmaster]

Life is short and in the end you will have to decide between now and situation and future/never...

 

I vacationed a lot when my children were young, we have three :eek: When they were young we flew many places when our youngest was one our younger. It isn't easy but was special. All them vacations were go somewhere and chill at beach, parks, resorts on kid times, retire to bedroom for naps and such, very different kind of vacation than a Med cruise. When we did our Med our youngest was 7 and even than it was a challenge for her and my older who was 14.

 

A cruise is busy busy busy. I can't imagine too many kids even the best one year old who would do well with getting up, long car/taxi/bus/train rides. In and out of sights etc. etc. etc. But if you and "friends" are buddies and know what you are getting into couldbe a vacation for the ages in more ways than one.

 

I don't think tag team works, who gets Athens and skips Rome or vice versa?

 

I'd say to a nice beach vacation now and wait 10 years for the big Med cruise!

 

Hello! I am interested in finding out from people who have done a mediterranean cruise with a very young child/children, or have cruised to those places before and observed anyone who had a young child.

My friends and I have a one time chance opportunity to take a mediteranean cruise together, however they have a baby who will be 1 at the time of travel and noone to leave the baby with. We want to do a very port intensive 12-14 night cruise and I am wondering if such a thing is doable with a child so young, and if anyone can offer insight on how it would affect the experience and how rough that might be on the child?

has anyone actually done this? (cruised Europe with very young child) and what are your insights? Many ports like Rome etc are very far from the port of call and it would have to be a day trip to see places. Anyone done with with a young child? If you have been to those places, what are your insights for taking a child along?

Looking for opinions/insights/tips/anything!

[Rosieo]

If I were going on the cruise and it was my baby I would go. I would know what I was up against, not staying out late, skipping dinners in the MDR, looking for excursions that are OK for a baby. But I would never go with someone else that had a baby at that age unless I told them right upfront that you are working on your own agenda and if they like your plans they are welcome to come along but you will not shorten your excursions or look for kid friendly ones. Nor would I babysit for someone else's kids on a once in a lifetime trip. You will be affected by this baby even if you don't plan on babysitting it.

[NalCruiser]

I completely and totally agree with all of you. The plan was 2 couples by the way - one couple has a baby.

I was concerned about this from the get go which is why I started asking around the forums on what people thought about a baby on a Med cruise. My friends don't think the baby would affect things at all but of course its their baby and they see things through rosy eyes. I actually do think that a caribbean cruise or a disney ship would be a wonderful vacation for a family with kids that young. As in, I wouldn't avoid cruising altogether - but like many have said, a Med cruise is a completely different kind of vacation and you really don't wanna miss out on all the sight seeing and the experience the way its meant to be because of the limitations of traveling with a young child. Now I have heard of people who do it and seem to think it was doable and everyone was just a naysayer. But why take such a risk.

I can't tell my friends NOT to go or stop them from whatever they want to do, but I am just trying to distance myself in my own plans and not try to collaborate as much and just to make it clear that I don't intend to miss out on anything because this trip is about me seeing the places I would love to see and I don't want to be slowed down. As for them, I love them dearly but frankly I can't imagine how it is they will have a good time unless they scale things back and realize that the baby is the priority. In which case - why not go Disney for now.

[maryann ns]

You have made a good decision. I still suggest as I mentioned in a post above, that you put your thoughts in writing - maybe a friendly email.