Chosing a travel partner

[penguinscott]

I recently returned from a transatlantic with a group of friends. My cabinmate was a woman I had only known for a few months. She was in my social circle. We got along well until we set sail.

 

My point is, make sure you know who you are traveling with. This means things like:

 

Are you an early riser? Are you a night owl? If your cabinmate is the opposite, will they be bothered by comings and goings at different hours?

 

Will you be traveling with a foodie who is going to complain about food or are their tastes more along the lines of Mc Donalds?

 

Do they expect to hang out with you all the time, or will you each have your own daytime agendas?

 

Do they smoke? I don't and she did. Our cabin reeked of cigarettes, even tho she never did so in the cabin. Her clothes had the stench in them. (Good tip: bring a can of air freshener. Helps out with the bathroom as well.)

 

Are you an active traveler? Do you like to see as much as you can? My cabin mate was fine sitting at a bar. I wanted to get out and see the sights.

 

Things like this can really make or break your trip. Also, find out if they are on meds and don't let them go off them during the trip!

 

If you'd like to hear the story behind this post:

http://www.penguinlust.blogspot.com

 

Good luck and happy sails!

[april47]

I would rather travel solo unless I knew that person very, very well. So far the only time I have cruised with someone was with my adult daughter. If she didn't tow the line I could send her to "time out".:rolleyes:

[paul929207]

It is certainly import to travel with a roommate who shares the same attitudes as you.

[cb at sea]

I would never travel with someone I didn't know well, let alone ROOM with them! But, since you were with a group, I don't know why the roommate couldn't have been left to her own devices, and you go and do things with the others!

[commspec1]

I went on a cruise with a group from a woman's club so I didnt wont to pay for a single cabin so I was rooming with a stranger but the woman that planned the trip said we would get along well and she was right I asked her did the woman smoke or drink, no to the first question and to the 2nd question yes she was a social drinker which I do. We checked what plans we had for the day, she was an early riser so was I so that worked out well. We didn't expect to be joined at the hips so while she did her thing I did mine as my 3 sisters were in another cabin together so we hung ou together. We were on a Carnival line so we had the anytime dining but we had to eat between 5:50 to 8:30 so when we ate in the dining room my roommate ate with us a couple of times. I guess I was the lucky one:cool:

[penguinscott]

That's what happened, CB. The issue isn't the ship, you can always get away. But when you have to return to the room and they are ALWAYS THERE, it's a pain.

 

All the info is on my blog if you care to find out the scary details. It's listed in the main post.

 

I do prefer to travel solo. I just couldn't this time around.

[mszpolaris]

That was SUCH an interesting blog post, and I feel terribly about your trip with Beth. What a waste of a trip.

[chipq]

Plan B. Set her watch two hours behind, convince her to come ashore with you, near sail time excuse yourself to the restroom and ditch her...straight back to the ship. SOLO CRUISING!

 

 

http://luv2cruise.blogspot.com.

[NoobCruise]

Yikes!

[BlueRiband]

That's what happened, CB. The issue isn't the ship, you can always get away. But when you have to return to the room and they are ALWAYS THERE, it's a pain.

 

All the info is on my blog if you care to find out the scary details. It's listed in the main post.

 

I do prefer to travel solo. I just couldn't this time around.

 

Girl Scout camp taught me that an overnight with somebody is a lot different than knowing them from school, work, or a social organization. FWIW, I prefer to take fewer trips but to sail solo. The cabin mate from hell will ruin a trip.

[elbodans]

you just made me SO GLAD i've never chosen to try to find a travel partner. it's much easier to find a solo supplement that i can deal with!

 

and sorry to hear about your camera. i hope your next trip is much, much better!!!

[LandlockedCruiser01]

FWIW, I prefer to take fewer trips but to sail solo. The cabin mate from hell will ruin a trip.

You can say that again! I had an experience very much like that years ago, only at a land-based all-inclusive resort, where I went with a friend. (I may have already mentioned it in another thread, but hey, it fits this one.) I wanted to get into the atmosphere, and just mellow out and have fun. He, on the other hand, was super-obsessed with being "cool" and "normal". (Example: I was in a conga line going around the dance/theater/multi-use area; he said he wouldn't be caught dead doing it "because it's embarassing".) Needless to say, we had a falling out by day 3, on a week-long vacation.

 

The rest of the vacation was pretty much solo for me, except for coming in to sleep. Not sure what my friend did. It stunk, since the AI where we went wasn't solo-friendly at all. That's what made me hesitant to cruise solo; I'm very glad I did, because it was so much fun. I had the complete freedom to do whatever I want with no one telling me not to, only with a safety net of assigned dining, endless organized activities, and a friendly crowd.

 

Maybe it's just me, but it seems a whole lot more socially acceptable to go solo on a cruise than to an AI resort. (How true is it?) In the future, I will either only cruise solo or have an "interests discussion" of sorts with a friend before going with him on a cruise. Like others said before, there's nothing more uncomfortable than to have falling out and be stuck wherever you went.

[penguinscott]

Thanx, all, glad you enjoyed the blog post.

 

Chipq, I LOVE that idea. I may just try that if I ever end up in that predicament again.

 

Never been to an AI except as a guest for 1 evening. But yes, solo cruising is THE way to go. Us flight attendants don't make much money, so there are times I want to go and get a good rate, but still need that other person to afford it. It's tough...cruise more often but have cabin mates, or cruise less often and afford the single supplement.

 

As I recently posted in my review of the NCL Spirit,( http://boards.cruisecritic.com/showthread.php?t=1647307 ) I'm accepting sponsorships to cruise. Contact me for your donations!

:p

[dustyroad]

I recently returned from a transatlantic with a group of friends. My cabinmate was a woman I had only known for a few months. She was in my social circle. We got along well until we set sail.

 

My point is, make sure you know who you are traveling with. This means things like:

 

Are you an early riser? Are you a night owl? If your cabinmate is the opposite, will they be bothered by comings and goings at different hours?

 

Will you be traveling with a foodie who is going to complain about food or are their tastes more along the lines of Mc Donalds?

 

Do they expect to hang out with you all the time, or will you each have your own daytime agendas?

 

Do they smoke? I don't and she did. Our cabin reeked of cigarettes, even tho she never did so in the cabin. Her clothes had the stench in them. (Good tip: bring a can of air freshener. Helps out with the bathroom as well.)

 

Are you an active traveler? Do you like to see as much as you can? My cabin mate was fine sitting at a bar. I wanted to get out and see the sights.

 

Things like this can really make or break your trip. Also, find out if they are on meds and don't let them go off them during the trip!

 

If you'd like to hear the story behind this post:

www.penguinlust.blogspot.com

 

Good luck and happy sails!

 

been there, done that also. never again :(

[deladypilot]

Well Scott, I think im just about speachless. What a journey that was.

 

Thank you for sharing your tale.

[Laughing Angel]

Wow, penguinscott.

 

Just...wow.

 

I just read your blog entry and that sounds like the kind of situation where I'd pack my bags, sneak out under cover of night and change my name. YIKES! That was all kinds of messed up.

 

So...solo trips from now on or do you think you'll ever try this again?

 

Thanks for the cautionary tale.

[RoofingPrincess]

Sometimes, however, you get extremely lucky in the roommate lottery.

I stumbled across these boards in 2006 as I was gathering information for a group cruise with a community chorus I belonged to. (Coincidentally, on that trip I roomed with a male friend that I'd known for years and it worked out quite well.)

On some thread I had posted on, someone commented that I might enjoy coming over to a Floataway Lounge thread, as it seemed I would fit in well.

I did, and I did. :D

That group was planning to cruise together, and eventually asked me if I'd like to join them. I figured that I had a graceful way out: I told them that I was single, didn't have a travel buddy or significant other, and didn't want to pay the single supplement. The next response was, We have two other women who are traveling solo but willing to take on a roomie, one smokes and the other doesn't, would you like to "meet" one?

Well, Wrona (wpr96) and I e-mailed back and forth for about a week and determined that yeah, we could probably get along well enough to share a place to sleep, shower, and change clothes for a week.

We never met face to face or even talked on the phone, until the group met up for dinner the night before the cruise!

We ended up in some of the same activities and excursions since we both opted in to some of the things members of the group were planning.

And most nights we lay there in the dark talking until all hours.

It was amazing how much we had in common despite a 20 year age difference. And after meeting the other woman who was looking for a roomie - well, she was nice, but I know we wouldn't have made the same kind of connection.

We've cruised together twice since then (one with the group and once without) and room together when the group has a land-based get-together. I even made a side trip on the way home from my last cruise to spend a few days with her at her house!

Can't wait till our next cruise in October!

[weltek]

Sounds like your blog post will be an interesting read! This makes me think about traveling companions in general.

 

We went on a cruise with my sister and her husband. We talked about our attitudes and expectations ahead of time (primarily that we'd both want some time alone as couples, and wouldn't be offended if we got sick of each other and needed more alone time!).

 

On the flip side...we have a couple that we do a fair amount with. We've known each other for ages (we got them together) and enjoy each other's company. We always talk about vacationing together, and this summer we are taking the plunge. As we've planned, the time we'll actually be together is down to 25% of the trip and we've struggled over agreeing on hotels to stay at. They say, "We are tightwads all year long, so splurge for our vacation." and in the next breath, "the hotel must have free breakfast because we don't want to spend money on breakfast." For us, we'll priceline a hotel and/or choose a cheaper one because we spend very little time there. We love to go out for breakfast or a "lighter" coffee and a roll at a local bakery. It's little stuff like that I'd never thought about being an issue.

 

Points to cruising for solving that kind of problem!

[dustyroad]

Sounds like your blog post will be an interesting read! This makes me think about traveling companions in general.

 

We went on a cruise with my sister and her husband. We talked about our attitudes and expectations ahead of time (primarily that we'd both want some time alone as couples, and wouldn't be offended if we got sick of each other and needed more alone time!).

 

On the flip side...we have a couple that we do a fair amount with. We've known each other for ages (we got them together) and enjoy each other's company. We always talk about vacationing together, and this summer we are taking the plunge. As we've planned, the time we'll actually be together is down to 25% of the trip and we've struggled over agreeing on hotels to stay at. They say, "We are tightwads all year long, so splurge for our vacation." and in the next breath, "the hotel must have free breakfast because we don't want to spend money on breakfast." For us, we'll priceline a hotel and/or choose a cheaper one because we spend very little time there. We love to go out for breakfast or a "lighter" coffee and a roll at a local bakery. It's little stuff like that I'd never thought about being an issue.

 

Points to cruising for solving that kind of problem!

 

let them sleep in and eat at the hotel while you go out and enjoy your breakfast somewhere else. i cruised with a co-worker who i got along really great with at work. but on the cruise she smoked in the cabin when she said she wouldnt ( you could smoke in them then ) and all she wanted too do in the ports was go too the jewlery stores and collect the free ' junk-stuff ' after being harrassed for 10 min by the salespeople. what a waste of the port days. finally i left her on her own and met her back on the ship. you just never know what is going too happen when you really get close-up and cruise together.

[sjcruiser]

I would have to know the person pretty well to sail in the same as them also. I like total darkness, no talking after the light/television goes off, I'm late nighter, but early riser.

[lady_cruiser]

I just read your blog and all I can say is WOW.

[penguinscott]

This has turned into such an intersting thread.

 

Remember, my cabin mate wasn't just someone I picked just for this cruise. We had already met and got along famously. I had no way of knowing she would turn into a monster.

 

Yes, I would do this again. In fact, I was just about to book an Alaska cruise next month with another friend of mine (Will, from that story, as a matter of fact).

 

Sometimes, we can know the person well, and they just freak out on us. Just made me think of a thread to deal with knowing your cabin mate. I thought I knew mine.

[hal lover]

I recently returned from a transatlantic with a group of friends. My cabinmate was a woman I had only known for a few months. She was in my social circle. We got along well until we set sail.

 

My point is, make sure you know who you are traveling with. This means things like:

 

Are you an early riser? Are you a night owl? If your cabinmate is the opposite, will they be bothered by comings and goings at different hours?

 

Will you be traveling with a foodie who is going to complain about food or are their tastes more along the lines of Mc Donalds?

 

Do they expect to hang out with you all the time, or will you each have your own daytime agendas?

 

Do they smoke? I don't and she did. Our cabin reeked of cigarettes, even tho she never did so in the cabin. Her clothes had the stench in them. (Good tip: bring a can of air freshener. Helps out with the bathroom as well.)

 

Are you an active traveler? Do you like to see as much as you can? My cabin mate was fine sitting at a bar. I wanted to get out and see the sights.

 

Things like this can really make or break your trip. Also, find out if they are on meds and don't let them go off them during the trip!

 

If you'd like to hear the story behind this post:

www.penguinlust.blogspot.com

 

Good luck and happy sails!

 

Read your blog about your roomie. What a nightmare!! I'm glad that you survived it! A few years back, I went with a dear friend of 20 years and it was a true nightmare as well. I will cruise only with my DH and solo now. Never again will I be in a situation like that. Life is far too short to deal with miserable people.

[penguinscott]

Yeah, you think you know someone...

[Gail & Marty sailing away]

Try a weeked first ..