Since the recent tipping post, I have to ask....

[Mum2Mercury]

On 2/22/2023 at 7:36 PM, teddie said:

... A number of posters noted that they gave their wait staff $20 dollars extra every night in the MDR. Also to their room steward ... 

First, I doubt this is true. 

Second, if anyone actually did tip this much, it was over-the-top.  

On 2/22/2023 at 7:44 PM, ngrund said:

... were those $20 a night tips for a couple, a family of 4, or a family of 8 with 6 obnoxious/messy kids?

I agree with tipping more when you require more service (like kids who drop food on the floor or a trash can full of diapers in the cabin), BUT -- if the family had a bunch of kids -- they're already paying auto-grats for the kids.  So they're already tipping "more" for their kids.  

On 2/22/2023 at 8:34 PM, soremekun said:

If someone only elects for prepaid or daily gratuities as defined by the cruise line and doesn't tip a single dollar extra, is that person cheap?

No.  Paying the auto-grats is doing what's expected -- no more, no less.  

On 2/23/2023 at 2:06 AM, teddie said:

Interestingly, after reading about "survey harrassment" by waitstaff here on CC, I was fearing the worst.  Not one waitstaff approached us about the survey!

teddie

Survey harassment used to be a real thing, but it seems to have disappeared lately.  I've wondered what's changed.  

On 2/23/2023 at 5:30 AM, Cherries Jubilee said:

... I have to admit I never thought of tipping the MDR hostess or the maitre’d. 😳

Doesn't a part of the auto-grat go to the head of the dining room?  That's a job that -- when done properly -- is invisible.  

On 2/23/2023 at 7:55 AM, S.A.M.J.R. said:

... Regarding taking the liquor off the bill because the "waitstaff just carries the drink" ... 

False.  The bar staff also moves alcohol from storage to the bar area, cleans glasses, takes away bar trash later, washing up the blenders, prepping garnishes ... they probably spend just as much time on these "invisible tasks".  Their job is more than just handing you a drink.  

On 2/23/2023 at 8:38 AM, sgmn said:

Your tips for a bad service ... 

Everything I've said assumes good service.  Personally, I've never received bad service on a ship.  If you DO receive bad service, it's right to withhold the tip.  

On 2/23/2023 at 9:31 AM, PolicromaSol said:

Pretty much this. Some folks tip extra if their group's a little more rowdy or needs more attention than the norm.

Agree; for example, last week I got together with old friends for dinner.  We sat at our table for several hours talking and catching up -- as we paid the bill, we all agreed to tip heavily because we'd held the table longer than usual and probably kept the waitress from serving another family.  

On 2/24/2023 at 1:12 PM, goldfish65 said:

IMO, this is why you are finding fewer and fewer professional waiters in the restaurant industry. 

I've never considered waiting tables a professional job.  

[S.A.M.J.R.]

25 minutes ago, Mum2Mercury said:

False.  The bar staff also moves alcohol from storage to the bar area, cleans glasses, takes away bar trash later, washing up the blenders, prepping garnishes ... they probably spend just as much time on these "invisible tasks".  Their job is more than just handing you a drink.  

What is false?  I was responding to someone who said they (or a friend, can't remember, don't want to go back) base their tip on the check MINUS bar tab because the waitress "just carries the drink to the table".  I asked how that is different than the food because the waitress "just carries the food to the table".

 

Please read an entire post for content before quoting me at least. 

[DallasGuy75219]

2 hours ago, Mum2Mercury said:

Survey harassment used to be a real thing, but it seems to have disappeared lately.  I've wondered what's changed.  

There was a question something to the effect of, did someone onboard ask you to give good ratings on this survey?  I imagine as survey harassment got worse RC started seeing more and more crew (the harassers) mentioned favorably by name and knew it wasn't all genuine. 

 

They'd have been smart to tell the crew that anyone who answered yes would have their crew recommendations ignored, which would have removed the incentive for survey harassment. 

[graciekelli]

20 hours ago, Mum2Mercury said:

 

I've never considered waiting tables a professional job.  

Huh? That' a bit harsh.  All people need to make a living.  Being a good waiter is tough with demanding customers who have special dietary requests, ensuring food is delivered hot or cold as described and promptly. Knowing when to return to a table often enough to provide great customer service, but not too often as to be a pest.  Addressing concerns that the customer may have.  I have had great waiters and horrendous waiters.  In my eyes, any job that a person executes to the highest of standards is professional and that includes housekeeping, gardeners, maintenance workers, etc...

[nelblu]

Here's an extract from an article published in a New York City magazine "The Cut'.  Never heard of it.  Now they are recommending a 25% grats on dining in restaurants.  Here we are arguing over a daily waiter grats and according to the guidelines we are considered cheapos.😇😊

 

Amidst the pandemic, tipping etiquette in America has undergone a noticeable shift, leading New York Magazine’s The Cut to publish a new list of 140 etiquette rules that outlines how much and how often you should tip, even at coffee shops and bodegas, causing New Yorkers to react strongly. 

 

The guidelines suggest that customers should tip a minimum of 25% to restaurant servers for dine-in meals and 10% for takeout, regardless of the quality of service provided, with a tip of below 20% deemed impolite and those with more disposable income encouraged to tip even more.

Additionally, coffee shop, café, and bodega workers should receive 20% tips due to the “tense environment” they work in, which can include complicated orders and stressed-out customers, with the exception of water purchases, for which tipping is not expected but considered “miserly” if affordable.

Other services like Uber and Lyft rides should be tipped a minimum of 20%, with the magazine acknowledging the pandemic has changed tipping etiquette and stating that the old conventions no longer apply.

 

It amazes me how some people are so free with other peoples money.

[Morecruisesplz]

10 minutes ago, nelblu said:

Here's an extract from an article published in a New York City magazine "The Cut'.  Never heard of it.  Now they are recommending a 25% grats on dining in restaurants.  Here we are arguing over a daily waiter grats and according to the guidelines we are considered cheapos.😇😊

 

Amidst the pandemic, tipping etiquette in America has undergone a noticeable shift, leading New York Magazine’s The Cut to publish a new list of 140 etiquette rules that outlines how much and how often you should tip, even at coffee shops and bodegas, causing New Yorkers to react strongly. 

 

The guidelines suggest that customers should tip a minimum of 25% to restaurant servers for dine-in meals and 10% for takeout, regardless of the quality of service provided, with a tip of below 20% deemed impolite and those with more disposable income encouraged to tip even more.

Additionally, coffee shop, café, and bodega workers should receive 20% tips due to the “tense environment” they work in, which can include complicated orders and stressed-out customers, with the exception of water purchases, for which tipping is not expected but considered “miserly” if affordable.

Other services like Uber and Lyft rides should be tipped a minimum of 20%, with the magazine acknowledging the pandemic has changed tipping etiquette and stating that the old conventions no longer apply.

 

It amazes me how some people are so free with other peoples money.

Irrelevant 

[goldfish65]

Thanks for the comments defending "waiting tables" as being a professional job. Maybe a good number of those working that job themselves, don't consider it a professional job, and are just in it for the income as they work towards something else. 

 

I'm 63 and have made a career out of being a restaurant server. Why I didn't pursue something with more prestige and more earning power, is because of unusual and personal circumstances. 

 

Everyone is entitled to think what they want about it. For anyone who is interested, in my case, I've spent countless hours in education and training. In wine alone, weekly classes learning about all the grape varietals, the farming methods and the winemaking methods. The history. The regions. Well, you get the picture. I had the privilege of being sponsored on two visits to the California wine country because I sold the most wine. 

 

We take elaborate steps for people who have allergies. Filling out a form, talking to the chef, and flagging each item in the computer.  Nice when they tell you later, it's wasn't really an allergy, they just don't like onions, haha!

 

Undercover inspectors come regularly, let's say a waiter has an off day and things don't go 100% well, or even things happen that are not entirely in his control, when that report comes in, all the top management knows what you did wrong, and you are called to the office to rehash it all.

 

We are tested weekly, on menu, wine, and standards. We have regular mandatory classes on food safety,  liability, not over-serving alcohol, and whatever else, which is often a waste of time. We do get paid our regular wage, $4.25/hr.

 

It's not very easy or pleasant when you have to cut someone off because they are intoxicated. ;'

 

This is already a long read. There is a lot more to the job, that takes both physical and interpersonal skills. On a final note, it is also very rewarding, the times when you know you've given people a special experience, such as an extended family having a rare time together, or couples on their honeymoon or celebrating a milestone anniversary. 

[Morecruisesplz]

50 minutes ago, goldfish65 said:

Thanks for the comments defending "waiting tables" as being a professional job. Maybe a good number of those working that job themselves, don't consider it a professional job, and are just in it for the income as they work towards something else. 

 

I'm 63 and have made a career out of being a restaurant server. Why I didn't pursue something with more prestige and more earning power, is because of unusual and personal circumstances. 

 

Everyone is entitled to think what they want about it. For anyone who is interested, in my case, I've spent countless hours in education and training. In wine alone, weekly classes learning about all the grape varietals, the farming methods and the winemaking methods. The history. The regions. Well, you get the picture. I had the privilege of being sponsored on two visits to the California wine country because I sold the most wine. 

 

We take elaborate steps for people who have allergies. Filling out a form, talking to the chef, and flagging each item in the computer.  Nice when they tell you later, it's wasn't really an allergy, they just don't like onions, haha!

 

Undercover inspectors come regularly, let's say a waiter has an off day and things don't go 100% well, or even things happen that are not entirely in his control, when that report comes in, all the top management knows what you did wrong, and you are called to the office to rehash it all.

 

We are tested weekly, on menu, wine, and standards. We have regular mandatory classes on food safety,  liability, not over-serving alcohol, and whatever else, which is often a waste of time. We do get paid our regular wage, $4.25/hr.

 

It's not very easy or pleasant when you have to cut someone off because they are intoxicated. ;'

 

This is already a long read. There is a lot more to the job, that takes both physical and interpersonal skills. On a final note, it is also very rewarding, the times when you know you've given people a special experience, such as an extended family having a rare time together, or couples on their honeymoon or celebrating a milestone anniversary. 

Nothing like being a server on a cruise ship. 

[teddie]

2 hours ago, goldfish65 said:

Thanks for the comments defending "waiting tables" as being a professional job. Maybe a good number of those working that job themselves, don't consider it a professional job, and are just in it for the income as they work towards something else. 

 

I'm 63 and have made a career out of being a restaurant server. Why I didn't pursue something with more prestige and more earning power, is because of unusual and personal circumstances. 

 

Everyone is entitled to think what they want about it. For anyone who is interested, in my case, I've spent countless hours in education and training. In wine alone, weekly classes learning about all the grape varietals, the farming methods and the winemaking methods. The history. The regions. Well, you get the picture. I had the privilege of being sponsored on two visits to the California wine country because I sold the most wine. 

 

We take elaborate steps for people who have allergies. Filling out a form, talking to the chef, and flagging each item in the computer.  Nice when they tell you later, it's wasn't really an allergy, they just don't like onions, haha!

 

Undercover inspectors come regularly, let's say a waiter has an off day and things don't go 100% well, or even things happen that are not entirely in his control, when that report comes in, all the top management knows what you did wrong, and you are called to the office to rehash it all.

 

We are tested weekly, on menu, wine, and standards. We have regular mandatory classes on food safety,  liability, not over-serving alcohol, and whatever else, which is often a waste of time. We do get paid our regular wage, $4.25/hr.

 

It's not very easy or pleasant when you have to cut someone off because they are intoxicated. ;'

 

This is already a long read. There is a lot more to the job, that takes both physical and interpersonal skills. On a final note, it is also very rewarding, the times when you know you've given people a special experience, such as an extended family having a rare time together, or couples on their honeymoon or celebrating a milestone anniversary. 

Thanks for the interesting details, and sorry you had to go to such lengths to explain that you are an expert in your field, and certainly a wait staff and wine professional.  Whether your'e using the word as a verb or an adjective.  

 

Cheers,

 

Teddie

 

Edited February 26, 2023 by teddie

[teddie]

1 hour ago, fredmdcruisers said:

Nothing like being a server on a cruise ship. 

@fredmdcruisers, the reply was regarding the term "professional", so it makes sense to me, cruise ship or otherwise.  🙂

 

teddie

[Cru1s1ng2009]

On 2/22/2023 at 7:36 PM, teddie said:

I've mustered up some bravery to ask my tipping questions after seeing the most recent tipping post.  We live in the NY metro area (NJ) and I was raised in NYC by a service-oriented family (hospitality business), so I consider myself a decent tipper.  On our last cruise on the 2/4 Anthem sailing, a group on another platform (which shall remain unnamed) discussed tippping.  A number of posters noted that they gave their wait staff $20 dollars extra every night in the MDR. Also to their room steward.  I felt kinda like I was under some rock, as after 10 cruises, we have never tipped that much!

 

We sailed in a non-suite balcony cabin, paid the automatic gratuities, and at the end of the cruise, we gave the waiter, assistant waiter and room steward $60 more each.  We tipped the hostess at the MTD podium and the Maitre 'd $20 each. 

 

I'm not looking for a debate, but would love to hear what others are doing.  Hence, I ask the following:

 

1.  Do you feel that $20 extra each per night was appropriate for the wait staff and room steward? 

2.  Were my tips over the top?

3.  Have I turned into an outdated stiff?? 

 

Lay it on me, people.

 

Thanks (I think!)

Teddie

 

 

 

I am a very good tipper. So is my DD. We have both worked in the service industry so we get it. 

I do not and could not tip $20 a night extra to each of the main hitters. i tip like you do. about $60-80 pp over the autos. 

[BirdTravels]

On 2/24/2023 at 8:36 PM, HBE4 said:

Growing up - 1960's & 1970's - I always heard that you should tip 15% at lunch and 20% at dinner, presumably because dinner was more involved.  I don't remember what the tip for breakfast was. 10%? loose change? A reminder to not smoke in bed?

That was 60 years ago. Today the norm is 20%

[BirdTravels]

On 2/22/2023 at 7:36 PM, teddie said:

1.  Do you feel that $20 extra each per night was appropriate for the wait staff and room steward? 

2.  Were my tips over the top?

3.  Have I turned into an outdated stiff?? 

We normally tip our waiter and assistant waiter about $75 each for a 7-night cruise... so it is essentially $20/night

 

We normally tip our room steward $75 or $100 for a 7-night cruise for the two of us. 

 

On our last cruise, we tipped the assistant restaurant manager for our section because he shuffled tables for us nightly so that we would have the same waiters and personally got our initial drinks. 

[Morecruisesplz]

53 minutes ago, BirdTravels said:

We normally tip our waiter and assistant waiter about $75 each for a 7-night cruise... so it is essentially $20/night

 

We normally tip our room steward $75 or $100 for a 7-night cruise for the two of us. 

 

On our last cruise, we tipped the assistant restaurant manager for our section because he shuffled tables for us nightly so that we would have the same waiters and personally got our initial drinks. 

Plus auto grats, right? We normally take $1000 in 1s, 5s, 10s and 20s. We spread it liberally amongst the crew with no regard to quality of services rendered. Normally, of course

 

[Longford]

3 hours ago, teddie said:

@fredmdcruisers, the reply was regarding the term "professional", so it makes sense to me, cruise ship or otherwise.  🙂

 

Troubling to me is the seemingly condescending attitudes / comments about waiters.  I suspect persons making those comments might be accustomed to stiffing waiters, generally (not just on cruise ships) or leaving gratuities not commensurate with service they may receive ... because they think better of themselves.  I hope my suspicion is inaccurate.

[teddie]

6 minutes ago, Longford said:

 

Troubling to me is the seemingly condescending attitudes / comments about waiters.  I suspect persons making those comments might be accustomed to stiffing waiters, generally (not just on cruise ships) or leaving gratuities not commensurate with service they may receive ... because they think better of themselves.  I hope my suspicion is inaccurate.

I was a waitress all though college and I worked hard and I was damn good at it.  Their were many servers who were way past my age at the time, and I admired them for their tenacity and skill.  It's honest work. 

teddie

 

[Morecruisesplz]

44 minutes ago, Longford said:

 

Troubling to me is the seemingly condescending attitudes / comments about waiters.  I suspect persons making those comments might be accustomed to stiffing waiters, generally (not just on cruise ships) or leaving gratuities not commensurate with service they may receive ... because they think better of themselves.  I hope my suspicion is inaccurate.

I certainly did not mean it that way. My only point was that waiters and managers in non-cruise ship restaurants are trained much differently than cruise ship staff. That does not mean anyone should not tip wait staff on cruises. Only that imho one can not compare the two different jobs. The training and performance are different.

Edited February 27, 2023 by fredmdcruisers
Typo

[goldfish65]

37 minutes ago, fredmdcruisers said:

I certainly did not mean it that way. My only point was that waiters and managers in non-cruise ship restaurants are trained much differently than cruise ship staff. That does not mean anyone should not tip wait staff on cruises. Only that imho one can not compare the two different jobs. The training and performance are different.

Definitely agree with you! What the cruise ship waiters go through, all the extra challenges they have, is humbling for me to witness. 

[Morecruisesplz]

11 minutes ago, goldfish65 said:

Definitely agree with you! What the cruise ship waiters go through, all the extra challenges they have, is humbling for me to witness. 

And they are the main means of the guest experience. Pressure from both sides.

[kirtihk]

On 2/25/2023 at 1:46 PM, Mum2Mercury said:

The bar staff also moves alcohol from storage to the bar area, cleans glasses, takes away bar trash later, washing up the blenders, prepping garnishes ... they probably spend just as much time on these "invisible tasks".  Their job is more than just handing you a drink.

Correct; however, what the difference (in efforts) for any above when serving $10 glass of wine vs say $200 serving of something?  Is it really 20 more work involved?  If that's true, then if for $10 serving it takes say 10 min of total work then it would be almost half of entire 8-hour shift for $150 serving.  It sounds about "right".

[BirdTravels]

17 hours ago, fredmdcruisers said:

Plus auto grats, right? We normally take $1000 in 1s, 5s, 10s and 20s. We spread it liberally amongst the crew with no regard to quality of services rendered. Normally, of course

 

Yes. In addition to the auto grats. We are far from being "rich". But after paying $$$$ for a cruise, we are more than happy to show our gratitude to those who take care of us (in addition to the auto grats which covers others). And would never consider removing the auto grats and then tip nothing to save a few hundred dollars...

 

Once upon a time,,,, long long long long ago, I waited tables in high school and college in a fine dining restaurant. And even back then, there were those who would walk out of a fine dining restaurant and not leave a tip after receiving impeccable service. I will never be one of those people. 

Edited February 27, 2023 by BirdTravels

[Morecruisesplz]

56 minutes ago, BirdTravels said:

Yes. In addition to the auto grats. We are far from being "rich". But after paying $$$$ for a cruise, we are more than happy to show our gratitude to those who take care of us (in addition to the auto grats which covers others). And would never consider removing the auto grats and then tip nothing to save a few hundred dollars...

 

Once upon a time,,,, long long long long ago, I waited tables in high school and college in a fine dining restaurant. And even back then, there were those who would walk out of a fine dining restaurant and not leave a tip after receiving impeccable service. I will never be one of those people. 

Common story about why you tip but tips are meant to reward service. 

And you always equate removing auto grats with no further tipping. So untrue if you read the thread.

[BirdTravels]

35 minutes ago, fredmdcruisers said:

And you always equate removing auto grats with no further tipping. So untrue if you read the thread.

 

Tell me why you would remove auto grats? To stiff those hard working crew members who work to ensure that you have a wonderful cruise to save a buck. Yes???

Edited February 27, 2023 by BirdTravels

[Morecruisesplz]

4 minutes ago, BirdTravels said:

 

Tell me why you would remove auto grats? To stiff those hard working crew members who work to ensure that you have a wonderful crew. Yes????

If I did, it would be to be make sure my tips go to those who actually provide service. Auto grats = no worries about service. Get tipped no matter what. Plus, from discussions here and onboard, tipping in cash almost always results in more tipping than you claim.

[BirdTravels]

1 minute ago, fredmdcruisers said:

If I did, it would be to be make sure my tips go to those who actually provide service. Auto grats = no worries about service. Get tipped no matter what. Plus, from discussions here and onboard, tipping in cash almost always results in more tipping than you claim.

Crew members that receive gratuity depend on that gratuity for their salary. All of those who you stiff when you delete your auto grats. 

 

For example, in the great state of Alabama, the [appalling] minimum wage is $7.25/hour. But,,,, if you are in a job that receives gratuities, an employer can pay as little as $2.13/hour,,, assuming that the first $5.12 per hour of your tips will go to getting you up to the [appalling] minimum wage of $7.25. And for a corner diner waiter, that's a lot of money per hour when people leave lose change for tips. 

 

Your room steward's salary works the same way. They have a contract, but get paid by Royal for a fraction of that contact. A large chunk of their tips go to getting them up to their minimum contract value before they actually start making "tips".