Multi Generational Cruise Ground Rules

[spedrson]

We are going on a cruise with family members ranging in age from 17-75. We're not a huge group, only 6 of us altogether. If you've gone on a multi-generational cruise before what kind of ground rules/expectations do you talk about before boarding the cruise ship? I want everyone to have the freedom to do what they want without feeling like we all have to do everything together (especially my "kids" ages 17 & 21). Do you eat all of your meals together or only meet up for one a day? Give me whatever tips you have for a great multi generational trip! 

[kitkat343]

With 6 people, it might be cost effective to arrange private tours for just your family.   When I've travelled with a  multigenerational cruise my kids were younger, and what we did was sit down with the grandparents and I'd tell them what I wanted to do and then the grandparents would decide if they want to join us on our private tour or if they want to go on a cruise tour instead.  Most ports they would come with us, but for a few they wanted to do city tours or skip zoos/aquariums/other tours we designed for the kids.  

 

Your "kids" might want more adventurous tours once or twice or it might be possible on a private tour for them to do something adventurous while the rest of the group splits off.  In Roatan, there is a zip line excursion place that also has a canopy walk, so half your group could go on zip lines and the other half could just take a canopy walk through the rainforest.  Local private tour operators might be able to come up with a custom itinerary that will make everyone happy.  

 

I would strongly recommend private tours for a multigenerational family if you can all agree on wanting to see the same thing, and you can find those providers on the cruise critic destination boards or on tripadvisor.  Just please be aware of one thing - you need to check the cancellation policies for independent providers in case your ship doesn't dock or there are any other issues.  This is especially important if you sail on NCL, because they are making a lot of changes to itinerary and you don't want to be out the cost of a private tour if they cancel your port at the last minute (although on my cruise in which one port and another morning were cancelled some people first found out about the port cancellations because the private tour providers in the DR were touting their generous refund policies in their initial email instead of talking about their tours,  and they were promising to refund money if the ship didn't dock because they knew it was a good chance NCL wouldn't dock in the DR and they were right that the stop was cancelled  

)

 

 

We normally all just ate dinner together, but it isn't unusual for people to run into each other in the buffet at breakfast or lunch.  You all can figure out what works for you.

 

This isn't applicable for you, but for families traveling with small children it's really important to make sure everyone is on the same page prior to booking in terms of whether or not the extended family will be chipping in to help with child care and the extent to which the parents need/want help.  Parents also need to consider the possibility in which not all kids will love the kids club (most kids love the kids clubs but rarely they don't) and the parents might need more help than expected if the kids club doesn't work out for their children.

 

 

[Itchy&Scratchy]

On 4/16/2023 at 4:19 PM, spedrson said:

If you've gone on a multi-generational cruise before what kind of ground rules/expectations do you talk about before boarding the cruise ship?

none.

 

My parents are  dependent on us for off-the ship time, so they always come along to whatever we are doing in ports.

 

On the ship, they have dinner with us and we go to all the shows together, of course, but other than that, they are free to explore on their own. We run into each other at food places or at the pool all the time.

 

My kid is younger (just turned 12) but he doesn't do kid's club, so he is attached at the hip with us.

 

My MIL is coming with us on the next cruise (most likely), so it will be a bit different, because my DH wants to show everything to his mom, whereas we are usually fine with just beach trips. My dad isn't mobile enough to see "everything"...

[MississippiMom]

We have gone on two multi-generational cruises, with a third one in a couple of months.  Our BIG rule is everyone has sit-down dining room dinner together. (If you wind up seasick, you are excused.)  Although not a rule, we have taken our ship excursions together, but aren't, necessarily, right next to each other the entire time.  One time, we did take a private excursion in Progreso to see ruins with two family members choosing to stay on the ship.

 

What we have discovered is that it is really easy to communicate via the cruiseline's chat feature, and we like to tell each other where we are headed in case anyone is interested.  Typically, at dinner, we will ask the children (ages vary, with some being young adults) what interests them in the evening activities, but no one is expected to stick together.  

 

Most mornings there is a subset of us eating breakfast together, and it's a fun time to hear about everyone's previous evening shenanigans.

 

Oh . . . make sure that everyone knows the other family members' cruise cabin locations.  We slapped a magnetic old black&white photo of my parents on the doors as identification.  For this summer's cruise, one of my cousins has already requested that I use photos of the cousins from about 30 years ago.  (And thanks for the reminder that I need to hunt those old down and have Walgreens make some magnets for me.)

[quagmire0]

All depends on the abilities of everyone in the group.  Nice thing about your scenario is you could possibly mix and match in different situations.  Send the kids off and do a parents/grandparents dinner.  Leave the grandparents and do an excursion, etc.  My best advice is to not force it and be flexible.  The nice thing about cruise ships is you usually have a ton of options.  If the grandparents want to eat earlier, let them.  Maybe aim to have one or two formal meals together and leave the rest as flexible.  If you try to force everyone into a rigid schedule/plan, then no one will have fun.  

Edited June 1, 2023 by quagmire0

[SimplyMarvie]

Breakfast together, so that everyone is mostly in the same place for whatever excursions/activities we might have planned, and then dinner together for whoever is interested. It's been easier to get everyone together for Breakfast since -- often the kids will prefer pizza with their peers for dinner. Ship's chat features, WhatsApp and Princess's Medallions have been a great help in making sure we can find everyone when we need/want to.

[mjkacmom]

On 6/11/2023 at 10:09 AM, SimplyMarvie said:

Breakfast together, so that everyone is mostly in the same place for whatever excursions/activities we might have planned, and then dinner together for whoever is interested. It's been easier to get everyone together for Breakfast since -- often the kids will prefer pizza with their peers for dinner. Ship's chat features, WhatsApp and Princess's Medallions have been a great help in making sure we can find everyone when we need/want to.

I think breakfast is difficult if the younger set stay out late and want to sleep in. Our family of 7 (5 kids) would have dinner together every night. Sometimes breakfast if everyone was up, never lunch (they were with their new friends all day).

[SimplyMarvie]

3 hours ago, mjkacmom said:

I think breakfast is difficult if the younger set stay out late and want to sleep in. Our family of 7 (5 kids) would have dinner together every night. Sometimes breakfast if everyone was up, never lunch (they were with their new friends all day).

 

It depends on how you structure your vacation. We're big explorers and have excursions first thing on Port days, so breakfast gets everyone in the same place to get off the ship together. Definitely means some of the teenagers are dragging their behinds into breakfast at the last moment after a late night, though.

[KimA75]

We always had dinner together.  If there were excursions that everyone was interested in, then we booked those together.  But, with the younger ones enjoying beaches and the older ones not really wanting beaches, that didn't happen often.  We also usually ate breakfast together to go over plans for the day in case anyone wanted to meet up for a show or activity together that day.

[skipsaur]

On 4/17/2023 at 5:19 AM, spedrson said:

We are going on a cruise with family members ranging in age from 17-75. We're not a huge group, only 6 of us altogether. If you've gone on a multi-generational cruise before what kind of ground rules/expectations do you talk about before boarding the cruise ship? I want everyone to have the freedom to do what they want without feeling like we all have to do everything together (especially my "kids" ages 17 & 21). Do you eat all of your meals together or only meet up for one a day? Give me whatever tips you have for a great multi generational trip! 

 

We did a multigenerational cruise where my husband (then boyfriend) and I were the adult "kids". We didn't do breakfast together because we were always up early and first off the ship at ports with booked excursions, etc while some of the family preferred to party late and sleep in. We did family dinner every night and while the seating time wasn't our preference, it was always a great time and we could visit the buffet before/after. We had all the rooms next to each other but I wouldn't say that was strictly necessary, it didn't add much to the experience. In ports, we did our own things as the other generations weren't interested in ziplines or packing in 30k steps in a day like us and we weren't interested in going to Senor Frogs. It was overall a great time!

 

What I would do differently:

At the time we were young early 20-somethings and liked having so much freedom and time to do what we wanted at our pace. But looking back, I wish we spent more time with family especially my husband's grandpa who is no longer with us. It was so special to all be there together and at the time I took for granted how rare a chance that was, because when you're young there's always a "tomorrow" or "next time". As a young person, there's always another cruise or another vacation, but there might not be another vacation with a grandparent. I wish I prioritized that family time instead.

[Onessa]

Reminds me of a family trip we took 20+ years ago. My parents paid for a cruise for all us adult kids, spouses, and grandkids to celebrate their 50th wedding anniversary. My older sister and her husband were a pain! Bristled at any 'family' time but were more than happy to have my parents babysit their son (and let my parents pay their expenses).

Most of the rest of the family still harbor resentment toward them.

 

Other than that it was a great trip and good memories. The rest of us worked to balance time. We did dinners together every night and by choice hung out as a group afterwards. Were not too interested in shows - better times just talking among ourselves. Young kids had option to go to kids clubs after dinner.

 

We did talk through excursions pre-trip and planned some that we all (less sister and BIL) went on as a family.

 

Mostly we did our own thing, but ended up spending a lot of time together or in subgroups.

[SoloAlaska]

Our range will be 13-85 with most being in their 30s. We will be 12 on this family cruise. We are doing dinner together unless you are going to specialty dinning. There is no way we would all do breakfast together daily since one person likes to eat before the sun rises and several may be nursing hangovers.