What to do about drinking age

[guntheros]

We are taking my 18 year old on his first cruise in October. So... my question is, do you let your kids drink in Mexico? We know the age on the ship is 21. But, my dh and me have differing opinions about letting him drink in Mexico. My dh feels that it may teach him about responsible, social drinking... having 1 or 2 drinks during the day and not needing to get drunk. I am not really sure what to think... I don't want him to think that drinking is okay with us when we get home since legal age is 21. What do you all think? I am probably opening myself up here to LOTS of opinions. Not trying to start a fight.

[LemurCat]

We are taking my 18 year old on his first cruise in October. So... my question is, do you let your kids drink in Mexico? We know the age on the ship is 21. But, my dh and me have differing opinions about letting him drink in Mexico. My dh feels that it may teach him about responsible, social drinking... having 1 or 2 drinks during the day and not needing to get drunk. I am not really sure what to think... I don't want him to think that drinking is okay with us when we get home since legal age is 21. What do you all think? I am probably opening myself up here to LOTS of opinions. Not trying to start a fight.

 

Seriously, work it out amongst yourselves. It doesn't matter what this board thinks. It's your kid. Please feel free to continue raising him.

[bcs819]

I think you should have an honest and frank conversation with him. Part of traveling is experiencing other cultures. In Mexico, you are allowed to drink at his age, and you want him to experience that as part of his vacation, however, it is still illegal in the US and you expect him to behave in the way you raised him, and follow the rules of the country he is in. That being said, many women go topless in Mexico, so he will get to experience that too :)

[big_duck]

How does one prevent someone from legally drinking?

[lebouefs]

if your son is responsible it will not be a problem ....... and topless in mexico ...... an 18 year olds dream boobies and beer

[Perfect Stranger]

How does one prevent someone from legally drinking?

 

Uh...by saying "no". You're still the parent and presumably paying for their cruise.

[big_duck]

Uh...by saying "no". You're still the parent and presumably paying for their cruise.

 

So extortion then?

[klfrodo]

These are my thoughts on the subject

They may come across as harsh but not meant to be. (lack of voice inflection and facial expression)

 

- Your 18 YO son is no longer your little boy. He's a young man.

- You have already done everything in your power to set his responsibility level in his earlier years.

- You set that level by your own actions that he observed from mom and dad

- At 18, he's most likely already had a drink or 2 with his friends. He might be able to out drink you.

- This is a perfect time to have a drink or 2 with your son. Not as mom and dad and son, but as lifelong friends. Have a drink and open up, talk about anything and everything. Once again, NOT as parents telling or advising son what to do or where to do it, but as friends.

- I know he'll always be your little boy, but I can't emphasize enough, he's now a man. Treat him as such.

[spenc]

My daughter is now 19. I took her on a cruise when she was 17 and bought her a frozen drink or two while we were on our trip. I have never made a huge deal out of a social drink now and then and have always talked to her about drinking responsibly. As a result of that, she didn't go out and go wild once she got to college because she knew what was expected and it wasn't some "forbidden fruit". A lot of her friends went overboard once they got to college but I didn't see that with her. As long as your son knows what is expected of him, I don't see why buying him a few drinks is a problem. I'm sure a lot of people will disagree, but that's life.

[elcuchio24]

At 18 he has probably already had a beer or 100 anyway, so it may be a bigger deal to you than it is to him. Of course all kids are different, but I think in general parents think their kids are much more innocent than they really are......

[yogi2929]

We let our 18yo DD gamble on the ship (she came out ahead:)) and drink in Mexico. She had a total of one Margarita. We were with her the whole time in port.

[Ashpalo]

These are my thoughts on the subject

They may come across as harsh but not meant to be. (lack of voice inflection and facial expression)

 

- Your 18 YO son is no longer your little boy. He's a young man.

- You have already done everything in your power to set his responsibility level in his earlier years.

- You set that level by your own actions that he observed from mom and dad

- At 18, he's most likely already had a drink or 2 with his friends. He might be able to out drink you.

- This is a perfect time to have a drink or 2 with your son. Not as mom and dad and son, but as lifelong friends. Have a drink and open up, talk about anything and everything. Once again, NOT as parents telling or advising son what to do or where to do it, but as friends.

- I know he'll always be your little boy, but I can't emphasize enough, he's now a man. Treat him as such.

 

I agree 100%!!!

 

If he is old enough to die for his country, then I believe he is old enough to have a drink with mom and dad on vacation.

 

It is a great opportunity to show him how to drink responsibly. I agree with your husband on this one.

 

Ashley :)

[cde48]

Honestly, I think kids drink/want to drink more, when they know their parents won't let them have a drink or two. If you teach them how to be responsible about it, and not get intoxicated, they will learn how to control their urge to drink. Same goes for sex. You know that your kids are going to do it, but you talk to them, and guide them how to be responsible about it.;)

[elcuchio24]

Nothing wrong with a responsible introduction to alcohol, even when someone is 18. I mean would you rather have your kid have a few beers with you on a vacation, or never touch alcohol until they go away to college? I don't know who here went to college, but considering the venue I would expect a pretty high %. Once you go to college you can have all the alcohol you want and your parents are far away. You don't want your kid trying the "forbidden fruit" for the first time in that atmosphere. I think anyone who has gone to college has the the effects or a first time drinker let loose on campus.....

[halos]

Rules, regulations and customs are different all over the world. Make it a lesson.

He wants a drink in Mexico? He's 18, if he wants it why can't he have it? It's legal....It's not legal when he goes home. He's a big boy, I am sure he's old enough to see the difference. If he's not, then I am at a loss of what to tell you.

 

There are things you can do here at home in the US that would be frowned upon elsewhere....there are things you can do elsewhere that would get you arrested here.

Why don't you tell your son to research the ports you are stopping at??

 

One thing I see a lot of (and it's disturbing) is that there are places in Mexico where drinking/being drunk and partying are perfectly ok...places like Cancun and Cozumel...BUT there are other places in Mexico where being publicly drunk is NOT ok. Mexico is a very Roman Catholic/Religious country. When we went to Progresso, we were told (during the bus ride down that LONG pier) that Progresso/Merida was NOT like Cancun, and they expected everyone to act respectfully.

From what I saw, it seems many cruise passengers disregarded that memo....:rolleyes:

 

The point is, know what the rules, regulations, customs are before you go...and feel free to do what is customary. But be informed. It's keeps you from looking like an obnoxious American or worse, getting into trouble.

[travelntreats]

OP... IMHO, this is an issue between you, your hubby and son and really should be kept that way rather than a discussion of what others think on a message board.

 

You are the parents and decisions like this should be up to you and your family.... not a message board !

[spenc]

OP... IMHO, this is an issue between you, your hubby and son and really should be kept that way rather than a discussion of what others think on a message board.

 

You are the parents and decisions like this should be up to you and your family.... not a message board !

 

 

I actually think its a very interesting discussion. :confused:

[Tbay-eh]

Like others have said - he probably has already had a few. Raised properly, with boundaries etc he probably is a responsible kid. I see nothing wrong with having a beer or two with him in Mexico as it is legal. On the ship is a different story. I see no problem with it if you are okay with it - not up to us to decide what is right or wrong for you as parents. We have a drinking age of 19 here and very seldom do we find that they do not have a DD - call home if they need a ride as driver has had a few etc. Our kids knew that they could call anytime for a ride - 3:00 AM - I'd rather wake up, pick them up and be a little annoyed than to ID them at the morgue.

[LemurCat]

I actually think its a very interesting discussion. :confused:

 

I think it's disturbing that parents need to resort to an internet messageboard full of people they don't know to answer a question that they, their spouse, and their offspring should be answering themselves. I mean, if you *really* want a sound opinion, hire a bloody therapist. It's not like their asking about an excursion or a port, they're asking complete and total strangers (some of whom are most likely psychopaths) for important life advice.

[travelntreats]

I actually think its a very interesting discussion. :confused:

Then you probably also loved the other numerous threads on the same topic :rolleyes:

[travelntreats]

I think it's disturbing that parents need to resort to an internet messageboard full of people they don't know to answer a question that they, their spouse, and their offspring should be answering themselves. I mean, if you *really* want a sound opinion, hire a bloody therapist. It's not like their asking about an excursion or a port, they're asking complete and total strangers (some of whom are most likely psychopaths) for important life advice.

Thank you for agreeing with me regarding this topic being an issue between parents and their child and is a topic that should be discussed and decided on amongst themselves rather than unknowns on a public message board !

[dan40]

At 18, he has 'known' about drinking for 4 or 5 years now. If he doesn't already know, Mexico probably isn't the "best" school. Places like Carlos & Charlie's and Senor Frogs are more akin to a bunch of Navy sailors getting their first liberty EVER, than they are to "responsible" drinking. The drunken crowd trying to re-board the ship is some of the best entertainment in the Caribbean. I know, I've been a star of that show!! Also have been a spectator of it. Fewer headaches the next day!:D

[MargaritaPlease]

an 18 year olds dream boobies and beer

 

I'm 49 and I still dream about that!

[halos]

Thank you for agreeing with me regarding this topic being an issue between parents and their child and is a topic that should be discussed and decided on amongst themselves rather than unknowns on a public message board !

so don't read it

 

At 18, he has 'known' about drinking for 4 or 5 years now. If he doesn't already know, Mexico probably isn't the "best" school. Places like Carlos & Charlie's and Senor Frogs are more akin to a bunch of Navy sailors getting their first liberty EVER, than they are to "responsible" drinking. The drunken crowd trying to re-board the ship is some of the best entertainment in the Caribbean. I know, I've been a star of that show!! Also have been a spectator of it. Fewer headaches the next day!

 

 

 

LOL..true, but not everyone gets off the ship and goes to those places.

[LemurCat]

so don't read it

 

Psssst .... it's really hard to know what *it* is unless you read it. ;)