Roll Call Etiquette - What Would You Do?

[sail7seas]

Another thread about Roll Calls brought a memory back to me.

 

I don't participate in Roll Calls and almost never even read them.

I don't plan to attend M&G's.

 

However.......

On a cruise several years ago, we were having breakfast in Pinnacle.

The two couples at the table beside us were talking about the Cruise Critic M & G which was to be held in about an hour. We could not help but hear them chatting about it as their voices carried.

 

As they rose to leave, I said to the lady who appeared to be the leader of the M &G from what we heard her say that I posted on CC, what my post name was and hoped she had a good time at her M & G. That was my only intention.... just to say hello to her and introduce myself and DH.

 

She was very gracious and insisted we attend though we had not signed up. I thanked her several time and declined but she insisted it was no problem and we should come.

 

DH didn't want to go so I decided I'd go.

It was a large group and the lady we had met was incredibly gracious and she included me in everything she had done for the group including small gifts she had purchased from her own funds.

 

I felt so uncomfortable accepting as I really 'didn't belong there'.

 

What would you have done?

[AZNative2000]

I felt so uncomfortable accepting as I really 'didn't belong there'.

 

What would you have done?

Knowing I would have been uncomfortable and didn't belong as I had never before made any contact, I probably would have smiled and said nothing to anyone but my spouse, and that, after we'd left the Pinnacle. But that's me.:)

 

Cheers!

[UPNYGuy]

Honestly, this is the exact reason why I took so long to join CC. My wife and I love to cruise, but we go into "sloth mode" when we go. We spend a good portion of our time reading, and walking laps around the promenade deck. While we appreciate CC, we don't want to be inundated with it when we are shipboard. We are both young (29), and have fairly hectic lives. We use the cruises as a way to decompress. HAL does a wonderful job at that BTW :)

 

Plus, I like the certain degree of anonymity that comes from being behind a computer. I certainly appreciate the roll call, and wish everyone well that partakes, but it is not for us.

[trophy_23]

Honestly, this is the exact reason why I took so long to join CC. My wife and I love to cruise, but we go into "sloth mode" when we go. We spend a good portion of our time reading, and walking laps around the promenade deck. While we appreciate CC, we don't want to be inundated with it when we are shipboard. We are both young (29), and have fairly hectic lives. We use the cruises as a way to decompress. HAL does a wonderful job at that BTW :)

 

Plus, I like the certain degree of anonymity that comes from being behind a computer. I certainly appreciate the roll call, and wish everyone well that partakes, but it is not for us.

 

I agree! We too are young (28) and have cruised HAL a number of times. I am always involved in the roll call, but do not attend the meet & greet. We too like our own space and I have met a number of cc'ers just walking around the ship and on various excursions. I enjoy meeting these people and have fun chatting with them here and there on the cruise, but I am not into meet & greets. I usually make it pretty clear on the roll call how to spot me and welcome people to say hello if they see me around.

[Two@Sea]

You were placed in an awkward position, but were gracious enough to allow her the pleasure of extending herself on your behalf, despite your own discomfort.

 

(She may have ruined your day, but you made her's.) ;)

[feathersandnananose]

We're not social creatures, but do keep up with our Roll Calls, and have stopped in to Meet and Greets. But we weren't comfy with the big noisy group, so we left. Not a problem.....

[Oceanwench]

I don't see it as being placed in an awkward position - as Sail spoke to the women as they were leaving, introduced herself and provided her screen name.

 

It was only natural for the organizer of the M&G to invite her to attend the event, especially if she recognized Sail from her many postings on the HAL board. Perhaps she was excited to have a celebrity aboard! :)

 

If I had been in a similar situation, overhearing people discussing CC and roll call, etc., I probably would not have spoken to them, knowing the inevitable outcome of the conversation would be an invitation.

 

I also would have felt that by initiating conversation with the woman, I would be placing her in an awkward situation.

[sail7seas]

You were placed in an awkward position, but were gracious enough to allow her the pleasure of extending herself on your behalf, despite your own discomfort.

 

(She may have ruined your day, but you made her's.) ;)

 

 

No, she didn't ruin my day by any stretch.

Had I not thought her pleasant and likely someone I'd like to meet, I never would have introduced myself. I didn't expect for it to go further. She is a warm, welcoming sort of lady and had gone to a huge amount of work 'running' her M & G. She was proud of all the effort she and DH had extended for it.

 

What I felt uncomfortable about was my fault, not hers.

I had not signed up yet I accepted her invitation to attend.

I should not have and that is why I ask what others would have done as I've felt bad about it since. :o

 

[mamaofami]

You were placed in an awkward position, but were gracious enough to allow her the pleasure of extending herself on your behalf, despite your own discomfort.

 

(She may have ruined your day, but you made her's.) ;)

What a nice post.

You certainly were put in an awkward position and were very gracious to go.You really did belong there, though, even if you hadn't been on the role call since you were a member of CC and it was a Meet and Greet for CC.She wouldn't have asked you otherwise.

 

I would have felt funny about accepting a gift, though. I don't know what I would have done. I guess, if she insisted, I would have taken it.It was a nice gesture on her part, and I'm sure it wasn't very valuable.

 

On the Eurodam, I had some people give me a gift for organizing the Meet. We had almost 80 people at that one. That was probably the biggest one we've attended.

I always go to the Meet and Greet and have organized quite a few myself. I enjoy planning on role calls and getting suggestions about what to do and see in ports.Sometimes we even form small groups for private tours. I also like to put a face to a name. But, unless we really hit it off with someone, we just see them around the ship after and have someone to say hello to. We met Sheila, Inn Lady, several years ago on a role call and became good friends and have done several cruises together.

On the Eurodam, I had some people give me a gift for organizing the Meet. We had almost 80 people at that one.

[regnig]

I believe you have nothing to feel bad about. If she had not wanted you to attend and partake in accepting a gift she would not have asked you. This is just an example of someone extending themselves and the only thing you need to do is "pass it on".

[Barrheadlass]

I believe you have nothing to feel bad about. If she had not wanted you to attend and partake in accepting a gift she would not have asked you. This is just an example of someone extending themselves and the only thing you need to do is "pass it on".

 

Ditto.

[Sea42]

As you initiated the conversation and made mention of the Meet & Greet I am sure the woman would have felt herself rude not to extend the invitation. If I knew that I would feel awkward attending I would have thanked her for the invitation and sadly declined, clearly stating prior plans. She didn't need to know that those plans might be just enjoying your husband's company or reading a book. You may have also offered to meet up with her at another time for a chat as she seemed like a very nice person.

[HamOp]

Let's face it. Some posters on here are the foundation of the HAL board. Sail is one of them.

 

Just by virtue of the fact that you don't often attend a M&G makes it that much more special that you did go. I'm sure the lady that invited you had read many of your valuable, informative posts and was pleased to have you attend.

 

I think you did the right (and nice) thing by accepting the offer.

 

What would I have done? If I really didn't want to attend, I'm not above telling a white lie, something like "thank you so much but I have a spa appointment at that same time".

[sail7seas]

Thank you.

I'm glad I asked. :)

 

 

[Seago2]

I see absolutely no awkwardness. Is it an age thing?

 

Sail, you rightly extended an introduction as a member of our group to another member of our group. We're you obliged to introduce yourself? No. But it's a ship, at sea, and our social contract would almost demand a hello, barring severe sloth mode or silent internecine warfare with the reluctant spouse. The M&G hostess quite rightly invited you to the M&G, knowing that the numbers for such things are never fixed and "the more the merrier" is the predominant vibe. If there was a touch of awkwardness in the air, she was right to effusively "insist", especially if she recognized your screen name and all that goes along with it. Likewise, you carried the burden of your 80,000 post screen name and were not likely to a) rudely decline or b) not show up. No, the die was cast once she knew who you were. She insisted and you politely went. And you would not be Sail7Seas if you were not a social creature, so of course you enjoyed yourself. And she would not have hosted that party if she did not want to give of herself, particularly her time, her attentions, and small gifts from her home town.

 

So you remain someone who steers clear of roll calls and M&G's as a matter of principle. But on that day, on that particular sailing, you found yourself a reluctant guest who showed nothing but enthusiasm, and found that you enjoyed yourself. And when it was over you ran the hell out of there back to your husband ;).

[Seago2]

Let's face it. Some posters on here are the foundation of the HAL board. Sail is one of them.

 

Just by virtue of the fact that you don't often attend a M&G makes it that much more special that you did go. I'm sure the lady that invited you had read many of your valuable, informative posts and was pleased to have you attend.

 

I think you did the right (and nice) thing by accepting the offer.

 

What would I have done? If I really didn't want to attend, I'm not above telling a white lie, something like "thank you so much but I have a spa appointment at that same time".

 

Ham. Op.

 

Please. The bug. The little buggy wuggy. I don't want to disable everyone's siggies. I will not block you- there are 500 people on the Carnival board I will block before I will block you. But count me in the growing group who is being driven batty by the bug.

[RuthC]

Please. The bug. The little buggy wuggy. I don't want to disable everyone's siggies. I will not block you- there are 500 people on the Carnival board I will block before I will block you. But count me in the growing group who is being driven batty by the bug.

You can turn off avatars without turning off siggies. You will lose the bug without giving up the signatures.

Over the years I have turned off any and all combinations of avatar, images, and signatures.

[Seago2]

You can turn off avatars without turning off siggies. You will lose the bug without giving up the signatures.

Over the years I have turned off any and all combinations of avatar, images, and signatures.

 

But then I wouldn't see your smiling face :)

[RuthC]

But then I wouldn't see your smiling face :)

Tough choice, I know. ;)

 

I posted the suggestion because I think some people don't know about all the options. I remember another person recently made the same complaint about the bug, and resorted to using "ignore" as a solution.

[Seago2]

Tough choice, I know. ;)

 

I posted the suggestion because I think some people don't know about all the options. I remember another person recently made the same complaint about the bug, and resorted to using "ignore" as a solution.

 

Meh, the heck with it. Nice guy! No way. My ignore list has exactly four people on it. The bug makes my left eye wander. It's not ignore-list-worthy by a long shot! Heck no.

 

Ok, I'm going to bed. Good night all!

[Linda&Vern]

I see absolutely no awkwardness. Is it an age thing?

 

Sail, you rightly extended an introduction as a member of our group to another member of our group. We're you obliged to introduce yourself? No. But it's a ship, at sea, and our social contract would almost demand a hello, barring severe sloth mode or silent internecine warfare with the reluctant spouse. The M&G hostess quite rightly invited you to the M&G, knowing that the numbers for such things are never fixed and "the more the merrier" is the predominant vibe. If there was a touch of awkwardness in the air, she was right to effusively "insist", especially if she recognized your screen name and all that goes along with it. Likewise, you carried the burden of your 80,000 post screen name and were not likely to a) rudely decline or b) not show up. No, the die was cast once she knew who you were. She insisted and you politely went. And you would not be Sail7Seas if you were not a social creature, so of course you enjoyed yourself. And she would not have hosted that party if she did not want to give of herself, particularly her time, her attentions, and small gifts from her home town.

 

So you remain someone who steers clear of roll calls and M&G's as a matter of principle. But on that day, on that particular sailing, you found yourself a reluctant guest who showed nothing but enthusiasm, and found that you enjoyed yourself. And when it was over you ran the hell out of there back to your husband ;).

Sail - Likely you brought your cruising enthusiasm to the event and everyone benefited. I've quoted Seago2's post because it says exactly what I feel and I agree 100% with the post. And next time remember - a "little, tiny white lie" is sometimes okay. :D

[CruiseWhere]

That was my only intention.... just to say hello to her and introduce myself and DH.

I would have stuck to my intention.

 

I felt so uncomfortable accepting as I really 'didn't belong there'.

How very gracious of you and I can only imagine how much she appreciated you attending her M & G and how very much it meant to her. Every now and then doing things for others also does alot for ourselves.

What would you have done?

After the last M & G I attended with my DH we have decided to forego them on future cruises. I appreciate and value all of our time. JMO

 

I'm just saying...

[Caribbean Amphibean]

Ham. Op.

 

Please. The bug. The little buggy wuggy. I don't want to disable everyone's siggies. I will not block you- there are 500 people on the Carnival board I will block before I will block you. But count me in the growing group who is being driven batty by the bug.

 

I like the bug. It's unsquishable.

[Copper10-8]

I like the bug. It's unsquishable.

 

I like the bug also; it kinda grows on you:cool:

[TiogaCruiser]

Quote from Seago ".....And when it was over you ran the hell out of there back to your husband ....."

 

I'm lov'in it!