Teacher wants us to CANCEL Dec. cruise!

[lmedw]

With all the crap that goes on in school, why in the world would any teacher have a problem with a family spending quality time together?

 

As a teacher I certainly don't mind families taking vacations during the school year - wish I could do it. I do feel strongly that there is a big wide classroom outside of the school building walls that families need to take advantage of. With this said I think the problems may be :

1 -extra work for the teacher in preparing special assignments early

2 - you teach a lesson while the child is gone and then they return and you need to reteach.

With all the pressure on the school systems to "produce" from No Child and End of Grades, time on task is valuable. Just wanted you to understand why she/he may be feeling this way.

Please be sure when you ask for the assignmnets to give plenty of notice. The few days before the holidays is not the best learning time in the classroom so there really shouldn't be a big problem. But moving your DD out of the classroom isn't the lesson you want her to see - hopefully it will be that of compromise and understanding.

[NancyC]

Good response Mrs. Pete. I am also a 9th grade teacher and while this teacher does seem to have a a problem, I hate to see my 9th graders miss a week of school for a vacation. I teach algebra and geometry and a week missed can be deadly to a student's understanding of the concepts. Since math skills build if the student misses a crucial section it may hinder them for the rest of the course. It is difficult to catch them up because math continues on and almost every day covers new material. I have tried doubling up assignments with them before they leave and they still seem to have problems. Just be ready to give your daughter whatever help she may need to catch up when she returns, staying after school for help groups, private tutoring, whatever it may take. I would also speak with the principal about the teacher causing your daughter stress. It is still early in the year and you don't want your daughter to dread this class the rest of the year.

[MrsPete]

Good response Mrs. Pete. I am also a 9th grade teacher and while this teacher does seem to have a a problem, I hate to see my 9th graders miss a week of school for a vacation. I teach algebra and geometry and a week missed can be deadly to a student's understanding of the concepts.

I teach English, and I agree that a week of missed days can be deadly. Most 9th graders NEED the class discussions about our novels' plots, characters, etc. They are not yet skilled in discussing anything except plot, and they have a hard time moving beyond "this is what happened in chapter 5" even with help -- they're still in middle school "book report" mode, and we're trying to move them forward to literary criticism mode. It's a big leap for them, and some of them must be drug forward kicking and screaming!

[Jane110]

What's not making sense to me in this discussion is the fact that you said you called last March, spoke to someone (of authority I presume) and was told that since it's not during an exam week, it's okay nad it's done all the time.

 

BTW, I hope you got the name of the person you spoke to and wrote it down. It's always hard to argue with a "Nobody here would ever say that" if you don't have the name of the person who said it.

 

Since you made your plans based on that information, I would go higher up the ladder than the teacher herself.

[hajekfam]

I understand how the original poster feels. It could be the teachers stance is coming from the school administration instead of the teacher itself. We had the same problem taking the kids out for school sponsored events let alone vacations.

Our high school had a very hard stance on missing school for any reason - our school band trips (to perform at bowl games with band competitions) had to be organized so that the students would only miss one day of school even if that meant missing out on part of the competitions or performances. When my middle daughter was in high school, she belonged to DECA and came in second or third place in the state competition in banking. She was invited to represent the state at the national meeting and competions in Denver. The group from the state was leaving on a day that would cause her to miss more than the schools recommended allowance of one or two days so they (the school administration) were going to give her unexcused absences if she left with the group "because if she flew out there a day or so later, she would still make it in time for the competitions". I told them fine but took a firm stance and told them my lawyer would be contacting them with a document that I needed signed holding them fully responsible for the safety of my daughter because they were forcing her to fly by herself and not as part of the chaperoned group from the state.

Here she had the chance to not only represent her school and state at a national school club event and get some teacher organized touring of something she had never seen before, and we were getting grief from the school! Needless to say, once I brought up the lawyer, the school administrator backed down and said she would get excused absences.

I could just imagine what kind of problems we would have trying to take her out for a family vacation.

[cruisinqt]

Every time the subject of pulling kids out of school gets brought up, it turns into a flame fest between teachers and parents.:( Let's not let this turn into one of those types of discussions again. Please remember that each situation is unique and we can't judge any of these parents because we don't know all of the details of their situation. Kids that have excellent grades and are quick learners can miss a few days without it hurting them. But kids that have poor grades and are struggling in school will be sorely hurt by missing school. Some teachers are very easygoing and take a few missed days by a student in stride while others are adamantly opposed. Some schools are okay with a short leave of absence while others clamp down tightly on unexcused absences. Each situation is unique, therefore the blanket statement that it's a bad idea is incorrect since none of us knows each and every student, teacher and school.:)

 

Nicki, I would be very careful about approaching the principal on this matter. If your school has strict guidelines about unexcused absences, the principal could cause trouble for you. Some school's have a "no tolerance" policy towards unexcused absences and they can make you miserable over this. On the other hand, if the person you talked this over with beforehand was the principal, then you're okay. Or you could talk to the teacher in person yourself and try to talk this over face to face. It could be that your daughter caught the teacher at a bad moment and a heart to heart talk between you and the teacher could smooth things over. ;) Your daughter could also keep in touch with a friend who is in the same class that could give her all of the homework assignments that she missed while she was gone. I can't imagine any teacher being so heartless as to throw all of her homework away. If the homework is done and on the teacher's desk the first day your daughter is back, it may make a good impression on her. And what teacher wants a parent to tell the principal that the homework was done but the teacher threw it away?

 

Good luck, I hope you resolve this issue soon. I also hope you don't get flamed too bad for pulling your kids out of school. This topic seems to get everyone heated up, especially cruisers that are cruising in the fall in order to avoid all of the children. When they hear that kids are being pulled out of school and might possibly be on their cruise, they get kind of cranky.:rolleyes: You might post this subject on the "family" cruising board, that board is full of very helpful parents who have lots of family cruising experience. And you probably won't get flamed as bad there either.

[spoonful]

I do think the teacher is coming on very strong here but i just don't see why people, in general, pull their kids out of school for vacation. I know there are special instances and i am sure a kindergartener would fare better with the loss of school. But to pull you kid out of school consistently is so crazy to me. I know that it is cheaper to travel during the fall and spring but isn't a child's education more important than a cheap ticket? Families bond at dinner time or movie night on Saturday or while cooking the thanksgiving meal. I just don't understand why family bonding can't take place during nights and weekends and summers and all the other times when school is out.

 

And, as a cheer coach, i would ABSOLUTELY put the girl who missed a week's practice in the back line. It takes so much more of my energy to bring a kid back up to speed; energy that takes away from the other kids who have come every night. And this is only a 7 hour a week sport so think who hard it would be to jump back into school.

[cruisinqt]

Most of the time, parents pull their kids out of school for a cruise because it's the only way they can afford it. I tried to find reasonable deals during springbreak, Christmastime, and summer break but the prices were outrageous! We would be paying more than double the price PER PERSON.:eek: For us, we would never pull our kids out of school for a few days at the beach or for a trip to Disneyland. But with cruises you can take your kids to countries that you could only dream of going to when you were a kid. My kids can experience the culture of many different countries and learn things that no textbook can teach. When my children saw the small, one room school in Belize it really opened their eyes to how good they have it.;) There is just no way we could cruise when school's out, it's just too expensive. The only way our kids can experience other countries and learn first hand about other cultures is if we pull them out of school. If their grades go down or they start having trouble in school, we would stop in a heartbeat. But for now, it doesn't effect their grades at all so we will continue to do this for as long as we can. I am sure that when they get older we will have to stop, but for now, while they are still young, it's working for us.:)

[Cruisin' Chick]

Nicki, I hope you get the principal's blessing. Maybe if you can sit down and explain what happened...

 

If you want to read a really heated thread on the matter,you may want to check out the "Do you feel guilty..." thread in the Family Cruising forum. One guy in particular, just couldn't see the other side of the issue (says his wife is a teacher and it causes hardship for her). Many of us pointed out that many families can't travel in the summer (jobs, higher cost to travel, etc).

 

We only took one cruise while school was in session. When our girl was in kindergarten, we got a fantastic deal (employee discount) that we couldn't turn down. I talked to the teacher and she was willing to give me the homework before we left. (yes, homework in kindergarten.) I knew of another kid i her class whose parents took her to NY during school and then let her take off a day when they went to a play the night before.

 

And from time to time I heard a parent say they were taking the kids out of school for a day at Disneyland or Magic Mountain.

 

I even kept my daughter home a couple of times last year because she was being bullied by a girl. the teacher seemed very ineffective and disinterested in helping stop the abuse...until we finally got the principal involved. At this school there were other instances of kids bullying or using racial slurs. I rather have the school addressed these issues than obsess over test scores that in the long run won't make the kids better people. I was happy to get my child in a different school this year (a "magnet" school).

 

IMO, children who get to spend quality time with their parents on a cruise may be better off in the long run than a child who's in class but their parents are ignoring them.

[kenandlaura06]

I am a high school teacher. I agree with many things that the previous said. It has been frustrating for me when students have missed school for vacation, because sadly, in my experience, few of the students have been proactive in making up missed assignments and many of the students have been students who were struggling prior to the vacation and have struggled more after missing as many as 14 days of school for vacation (yes, I had a student who missed over two weeks of school time because she was pulled out for two vacations). With that said, the teacher is very out of line in this case. She cannot ethically fail your daughter and it is not her business to comment on your family's decision. I don't like it when kids are pulled out of school, but I would only comment on it on these boards, NEVER to a parent of a student! You need to speak to the administrator in this school. Don't expect them to be sympathetic, but they should be professional. Don't mention "multicultural experience" as a previous poster said...that isn't going to help you at the high school level. Simply say that your family has long standing plans and that your daughter will miss school for a few days and is very conscientious and wants to do her very best not to have the absences effect her grade. In our district we do not have to offer the make up work ahead of time, but perhaps your district has a different policy. Do not ask for extra credit for a travel journal or anything like that--a high school teacher needs the assignments that they have given completed, not other assignments. Approach it calmly and you should have no problems. Good luck. It is always nice for teachers to hear parent's perspectives.

[CoachTerry14]

Under the No Child Left Behind Act, schools are held accountable for student attendance (Strange when you think about it- parents should be held responsible). Most schools are in session 180 days a year. This gives parents and students 185 days for vacations. The pressure to have students in school starts with the law. Each school district (and often school) has their own attendance rules. Students can be failed if they miss too many days. Depending on the length of the class and the schedule used by the school (Block, 4x4, etc.) One week could cause a student to fail. Most school districts have policies in place to excuse an absence. Very few (if any) school boards or schools have established vacations as excused absences!

[dogladyjw]

I remember my parents told me and I told my daughter that school was the child's job. And the ony acceptable excuse for not being in school was A. death in the immediate family, B. so sick that you had a fever, were throwing up or had Montezumas revenge. If you could get vertical you went in. Vacations were done in the summer. Thats why it was called summer vacation. If you were not at your job, you got fired. If you were not at school, you flunked. I think that is still the best plan. If we don't instill responsibility in children, how can we expect to have responsible adults. And if you ask most Human Resource Managers they would all say "If we could just find someone who would come in 5 days a week we would be thrilled. Most of the time they can't." They tell me that there is no work ethic because children were never taught to respect responsibilty when they were young. Ok, I will come down off my soap box now.

[laughoutloud]

I know I'm probably going off the topic question, but with all due respect, I

believe that taking a vacation is a luxury and a privilege, not an entitlement.

 

My husband and I believe that a child has only one major responsibility during childhood: to work hard in school & reach his maximum potential. Our family puts a high priority on education- we feel that school attendance & respect for school policy is more important than scheduling a cheap or convenient vacation.

 

Plus, imagine if 90% of the class took off the week before a holiday...

 

PS wow- doglady- we posted at the same time. I should have waited another minure or two. Your post says it all & better...;)

[clackey]

Its none of her business!!! I have 32 yrs. teaching/coaching and "said teacher" needs an attitude adjustment.

I agree with DannyMac. Our situation is a little different, however. My wife is a Headstart teacher and she has a new 'ex-military" boss that had a problem with her taking off in the middle of the school year. I told him that if he wanted to reimburse us for the cruise that I might consider canceling the trip. After 30 years of spoiled, undisciplined children, I believe that Miss Ginger is ready for a vacation and another job. It is not like the job pays a real wage anyway and with her experience she can get another job tomarrow. Sarge can kiss my rosey red *#@.

[Marcia621]

all im thinking is why did you even tell the teachers? just call the kid in (sick or mental health day) for a few days! noone needs to know your busisness. YOu are the parent, make the choices for her, DONT LET SOMONE ELSE DICTATE TO YOU how you should raise your child.

[FreesiaE]

all im thinking is why did you even tell the teachers? just call the kid in (sick or mental health day) for a few days! noone needs to know your busisness. YOu are the parent, make the choices for her, DONT LET SOMONE ELSE DICTATE TO YOU how you should raise your child.

 

That must be one sick kid to come back with a rockin' tan, tshirt from whatever port, and pictures to pass around :)

 

I'm neither a teacher NOR a parent. But, I have had experience with getting out of school for vacation and sickness. When I was pre-HS, I went to a private school, and it was quite easy to miss a day or two to say, head to grandparents' for Thanksgiving the Tuesday before than it ever was in HS. However, I also once got detention for leaving school 2 minutes early (with a parent note) in order to make a doc. appt. I needed the 2 minutes to beat the cars/busses out of the parking lot. I failed to return with a "doctor's excuse" and got detention. It was the only detention I ever got--I was an honor roll student with a ton of activities. I never served it though (due to illness diagnosis stemming from appt). I still went to college with a scholarship. That said, I think there is a healthy balance for teachers/administration and parent/kids regarding time off. I hope you can figure out a solution to please all parties!

[Stacylee]

Sorry, but I haven't even read the threads, just had to jump right in!

 

I booked our 9/26 cruise for my son's birthday (he will be 14, 8th grade). I know that in our school system they can miss 10 days excused for each quarter. So this is not a problem and should NOT be a problem in your case either. I don't plan to tell the teachers until the week prior so he can get his assignments though. Whatever the teacher personally feels is not your problem. However, it could be an issue for the rest of the year.

AFTER booking the cruise, I found out that my son is in the honors program this year and that means ALOT of homework. I might not have booked it if I had known - probably would have though :D .

I have always believed that traveling is the greatest educational experience there is and I feel blessed that I can offer this experience to my kids. I really do not feel guilty about taking him out of school. He is still getting a good education - and even though sitting on the beach is not educational, he will see places he has never seen before.

[momofmeg]

I would not worry so much. That last week of school the kids are in a "Christmas mood" and so are the teachers. Very little school work is done and only the meanest of teachers would give a test.

 

I have also run into some mean hard nosed teachers. My daughter in the 9th grade started having major problems with her monthly cycle. I thought it was just some little bit of cramps so I would send her to school anyway. This "A" student ended up with a "C" in P.E. because she would not participate in the sports being in pain. Ofcourse I guess I should not had forced her to go school so I can't blame the teacher for being unfair in that circumstance.

 

By the 10th grade we knew something was wrong more then just a few cramps. We were in and out at the Dr.'s office. My daughter missed like an average of 1 day for every 4 she attended. One teacher gave her zeros on tests even though she had Dr.'s excuses-claiming Meg had missed so much she needed a hospital excuse. My daughter ended up with a "D" in this class. I pulled her out mid term and put her in home school.

 

The school was very unfair and hateful about this- saying we were destroying our daughter's future.The school counselor even told us THEN we could put her on homebound and I asked her WHY was that offered then AFTER my poor daughter had a "D" in a class because the hardnosed teacher gave her zeros on tests when she was out sick.Well my daughter did fine in homeschool even graduated a yr. early.

 

We finially found out what was wrong with her. She had endemetrious. No Dr. thought of that because usually that is a disease of women in their 30's.

 

Meg had to have a surgery and treatments for this. she was unwell even with treatments for 2 or 3 yr.s So she actually did not start college until she was 19 even though she graduated at 17. She has done well in college always with high B and A averages.

 

I guess I got away from the point. My point is sometimes teachers can be unreasonable and hard nosed. We all know many young people who cut school etc. and need to be treated harshly but I do think a teacher should look at each child's individual circumstances. Some teachers group all young people with the troublemakers. This is unfair.

[jcs56]

First I want to say that "most" not all.....(before all those teachers jump on me) teachers have it pretty easy in taking vacations for their family. They have all summer off, Easter break off and Christmas break off. Not to mention alot of times when there are 3 and 4 day weekends. They also have alot of "days" they can take or accumulate. Now with that being said some of us have it a little harder. My husband for example has to choose his 3 weeks in January for the entire year and with about 100 guys choosing its veryyyyyyy difficult to get a week when the kids are off. We have struggled with this for 28 years. Now our youngest is 18 ( a senior in hs) and we are taking a cruise over Thanksgiving. He will miss 3 days. Just about every year my son and in the past all three of my kids have missed a week for a vacation. It is either that or no vacation at all!!! They just about always take work with them. Most times the teachers just given them make up work when we return. This has never been a problem in 28 years. Go on your vacation, do whatever you can to help them make up the work and have fun!!!!!!!!! You deserve it.

[Nitemare]

If you Home Schooled your kids, you could schedule vacations any time you wanted, and YOU can decide which is more important: A week of classes or another week of vacation.

 

Maybe you can arrange for your daughter to attend classes or do schoolwork in a structured environment during the week of scheduled school vacation that she is not going to be away during?

[perfectlynormal]

Meanwhile, I see kids in my children's high school who are present or future criminals getting more and more breaks, second chances, special attention, etc. etc.

 

I took my 9th grader out of school for 4 days to go on a cruise. Most teachers were very reasonable, but one was not--very punishing attitude, and would not give out work. She did all the make-up she was allowed to do, and maintained a 4.0. The one teacher was unpleasant when she returned, but he got over it.

 

We had a great, educational experience and never regretted it!

[SWEETNLOW2005]

I spoke to my mom last night. She is a teacher and she stated family vacation are excused at her school. I am sure this is just the teacher and not the school district.

[silentbob007]

Ah ... discussions like this is why I enjoy teaching college students so much more than teaching K-12 ... not only am I spared talking with parents, it's illegal for me to do so without written consent from the student.

 

However, the teacher is wrong to fail a missing student for the course (unless that policy is written and has been approved, and thus supported, by the principal).

 

Just to throw out a straw man argument however ... seeing as how teachers can only cruise at family rates, is it OK for them to miss a week of school for lower rates? Whether you pull your student out of school for a week or the teacher pulls him/herself out of school for a week, the argument for your child remains the same: Your child must learn the material by him/herself to later be evaluated by the absent teacher.

[geoherb]

My DH just started a new career as a teacher. I know how hard it is to plan vacations around the academic schedule. But we'll have to. There's no option for him to miss a week of teaching.

 

In the first post by Nicki, she said she had not talked with the teacher yet. She's probably just relying on what her daughter has passed along. Perhaps talking with her will allow them to come up with a solution.

[Cruisechick82]

I would definately check out the school handbook and district policy. I think teachers have to allow students to make up missed work, especially for scheduled abscenses. That is just plain WRONG and STUPID.

 

It sounds like you cruise is at the end of the semester, right before Christmas. Usually not much is going on then anyway as people are preparing for the Christmas break.

 

I only missed school once for a family vacation during my senior year. My dad was changing jobs so we had to go while he still had his vacation time from his current job. I missed a week and easily made up the homework I missed. Students did it all the time. Everyone that I knew who missed school for vacation did all the makeup homework and no one had a problem with it.

 

I think if the teacher won't relent in her stupid policy your daughter should have a madeup weeklong flu or other "illness" during that week so she can miss school and make up the work.

 

As long as she doesn't miss more days than the district allows, I can't see how a teacher could make a student fail for missing 5 days of school? What kind of a teacher would WANT to make a student fail and go out of her way to do that? That person should NOT be a teacher!