margeecruiser Posted April 16, 2015 #1 Share Posted April 16, 2015 I had an issue on our last cruise being stopped upon entering the main dining room for breakfast. The staff member insisted I take my hat off. I refused, stating my straw hat that was part of my outfit that day and was permitted for women. Men should remove their hats or caps, of course. I went into the dining room. The next day, the same thing happened. Later, I spoke to Guest Services without success; they did not seem to understand me. I then spoke to the concierge at the Diamond lounge. He called the dining room manager, who also stated women should remove the hats upon entering the MDR. I then escalated to the Food and Beverage manager and the rule was reversed. I have cruised for 30 years and have many cruises behind me. I take pride in knowing proper etiquette and was just floored by this. Has anyone else encountered this? What is your opinion on hats being part of a woman's outfit? By the way, what do my Red Hat Society sisters think about this? Margee Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
geocruiser Posted April 16, 2015 #2 Share Posted April 16, 2015 (edited) About waering hats. http://www.advancedetiquette.com/2010/04/hat-etiquette/ http://www.emilypost.com/everyday-manners/common-courtesies/479-hats-off-the-who-what-when-where-of-the-hat Edited April 16, 2015 by geocruiser Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
awhfy Posted April 16, 2015 #3 Share Posted April 16, 2015 If it was a baseball cap I would remove it in a restaurant. If it was a fashion hat I'd leave it on Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MrsPete Posted April 16, 2015 #4 Share Posted April 16, 2015 I'd say a straw hat is an outdoor hat, not quite an athletic hat but certainly intended for outdoor sporty activities (such as water activities). The hats that are "allowed" for ladies indoors are the type that really aren't worn any longer (at least by Americans). These tend to be small. They were "allowed" because they were a part of the outfit and because they tend to be difficult to remove /replace because they're pinned to the head. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
cb at sea Posted April 16, 2015 #5 Share Posted April 16, 2015 Men should remove hats inside...always. Women's hats are different, it's part of your overall "look"...unless it's something easily taken off...then don't wear your hat inside! Like a visor or baseball hat or your pool hat! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
margeecruiser Posted April 16, 2015 Author #6 Share Posted April 16, 2015 My hats are large straw hats that I accessorize with flowers, pins or scarves. They are always coordinated with my outfit. I am known for wearing hats. I love them. Margee Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CMDE Posted April 17, 2015 #7 Share Posted April 17, 2015 I agree with Margee, if she has gone to the trouble to accessorize her hat with her outfit, it should be allowed. It is the general rule, as I understand it, for women. As an aside, what if you are wearing a hat at breakfast in the MDR because you have lost your hair for medical reasons? Should you be turned away? I think not. Sent from my iPad using Forums Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
maywell Posted April 18, 2015 #8 Share Posted April 18, 2015 (edited) Umm, how big was the straw hat? Because if its a big floppy one - you have to take it off, doesn't matter if you're a man or a woman. If its tiny like a cuban one, then they went overkill on you. Edit: My hats are large straw hats that I accessorize with flowers, pins or scarves. They are always coordinated with my outfit. I am known for wearing hats. I love them. Margee Just noticed your post - yeah, you have to take it off due to large size when dining. The reason why is because hat might get knock over or stained by waiter when he's serving the food.:eek: Edited April 18, 2015 by maywell Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
margeecruiser Posted April 18, 2015 Author #9 Share Posted April 18, 2015 If large hats on women are forbidden, then why did the rule change when the Food and Beverage manager was made aware of the problem? Also, why would this rule suddenly appear on the Legend only? If the problem was the hat might get knocked off or stained by a waiter, why would this not also apply in any land based fine dining restaurant? I did not see these reasons listed in my etiquette books. By the way, my hats have a brim about 4 inches wide, which is not the huge floppy kind. Mine are made by Wallaroos, an Australian company and are an excellent sun protection. Margee Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CMDE Posted April 18, 2015 #10 Share Posted April 18, 2015 Those aren't floppy, should have been allowed under any etiquette rules Sent from my iPad using Forums Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
maywell Posted April 18, 2015 #11 Share Posted April 18, 2015 If large hats on women are forbidden, then why did the rule change when the Food and Beverage manager was made aware of the problem? Also, why would this rule suddenly appear on the Legend only? If the problem was the hat might get knocked off or stained by a waiter, why would this not also apply in any land based fine dining restaurant? I did not see these reasons listed in my etiquette books. By the way, my hats have a brim about 4 inches wide, which is not the huge floppy kind. Mine are made by Wallaroos, an Australian company and are an excellent sun protection. Margee I know what you mean but times have change - what was acceptable back then isn't now at some places. Sorry that happen to you, they should had explained it better - unfortunately, they thought the 4 inches was too wide (I had to measure it myself and I can sorta see the discrepancy from both points of view - yours and the cruise line). Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CMDE Posted April 18, 2015 #12 Share Posted April 18, 2015 Times may have changed in the real world, but cruise ships are different Sent from my iPad using Forums Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MrsPete Posted April 18, 2015 #13 Share Posted April 18, 2015 Mine are made by Wallaroos, an Australian company and are an excellent sun protection.The need for sun protection isn't usually an issue in the MDR. This description would indicate that this was, indeed, an outdoor hat and had no place inside. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Porthopper101 Posted April 18, 2015 #14 Share Posted April 18, 2015 I love hats. I wear them mostly to the race track. Sometime we go to the restaurant after the race. There is a restaurant call Houston in Pasadena, they ban hats except mine. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Porthopper101 Posted April 18, 2015 #15 Share Posted April 18, 2015 (edited) My two newest for the Kentucky Derby and the Belmont Stakes Edited April 18, 2015 by Porthopper101 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Keroppi2011 Posted April 18, 2015 #16 Share Posted April 18, 2015 Marie, I think your hats are magnificent. But then, I think you would look stunning even in a paper bag. Just returned from Britain, where gorgeous hats and fascinators in every colour were readily available in the shops. Wish we had that kind of selection here. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
iheartbda Posted April 18, 2015 #17 Share Posted April 18, 2015 Marie, I think your hats are magnificent. But then, I think you would look stunning even in a paper bag.Just returned from Britain, where gorgeous hats and fascinators in every colour were readily available in the shops. Wish we had that kind of selection here. Would never happen here since people want everything and everywhere to be casual. :( I tried bringing hats back by starting a collection and wearing them to church. An older lady stopped me and said she and I were the ONLY ones wearing hats. I finally gave up. (sigh) And yes, Marie would look stunning in a paper bag.:) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Laurie S. Posted April 18, 2015 #18 Share Posted April 18, 2015 The only hat I ever wear is my Tilley hat with my diving patches. Not into hats at all. They squash my hair and are a pain. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sail7seas Posted April 18, 2015 #19 Share Posted April 18, 2015 (edited) Seeing it bothered the dining room staff so much, I'd simply remove it. I don't think I'd make such an issue about removing a hat. Then again, I don't wear hats but for very rarely in the coldest, most awful winter weather. I do really like the photos of your hats. The red/coral one is particularly beautiful. :) Edited April 18, 2015 by sail7seas Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Porthopper101 Posted April 19, 2015 #20 Share Posted April 19, 2015 Marie, I think your hats are magnificent. But then, I think you would look stunning even in a paper bag.Just returned from Britain, where gorgeous hats and fascinators in every colour were readily available in the shops. Wish we had that kind of selection here. Yes, me too. I wish we had that kind of selection here. And thank you for your kind comment :). Seeing it bothered the dining room staff so much, I'd simply remove it. I don't think I'd make such an issue about removing a hat. Then again, I don't wear hats but for very rarely in the coldest, most awful winter weather. I do really like the photos of your hats. The red/coral one is particularly beautiful. :) Thank you. I am going to wear the red hat with Dolce & Gabbana white/black Polka Dot Dress, and a red handbag. M Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Porthopper101 Posted April 19, 2015 #21 Share Posted April 19, 2015 Would never happen here since people want everything and everywhere to be casual. :( I tried bringing hats back by starting a collection and wearing them to church. An older lady stopped me and said she and I were the ONLY ones wearing hats. I finally gave up. (sigh) And yes, Marie would look stunning in a paper bag.:) We should bring some hats to New York :D. Cannot wait to see you :). KK M Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Porthopper101 Posted April 19, 2015 #22 Share Posted April 19, 2015 (edited) Deleted Edited April 19, 2015 by Porthopper101 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
cruzisme Posted April 19, 2015 #23 Share Posted April 19, 2015 Love your hats Marie! If I had places to wear these hats, I would, but my lifestyle doesn't call for fancy hats. Growing up in the 1950's and attending church, we all wore hats. And yes, hats squish down the hair but when one wears these hats, I assume you are not expected to remove the hat. My hair would be a disaster if I had to take off the hat.:rolleyes: Would love to see more fascinators here too but most people are not interested. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
wdw1972 Posted April 19, 2015 #24 Share Posted April 19, 2015 Whether it's right or wrong, my opinion is hats on a female are ridiculous and not appropriate. They just plain look stupid - unless you're outside seeking shelter from sun. Inside, in a dining room - completely inappropriate. Sue/WDW1972 11/27/15 Oosterdam Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ScottsSweetie Posted April 20, 2015 #25 Share Posted April 20, 2015 I just have to say - we look for the Preacher's wife in our church every Sunday to see what her hat looks like each week! She is, I would say, 40-45 years old and wears a different hat every week. She is very easy to spot! :) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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