Meltdowns-what do you do?

[1bellamarie]

We're taking our 16 month old son on his first cruise (it will be our 5th) this Sunday. We're doing a 14 dayer to boot! We booked the trip a year ago and as first time parents didn't factor in such things as teething, tantrums and meltdowns. So...now that the time has come for us to sail, he's cutting 5, yes FIVE, teeth and has discovered tantrums.

 

We've packed a TON of toys, meds, soothers, and I think we're covered on "stuff." But, when/if your little ones become holy terrors on the ship, what do you do? If he screams for an hour in the cabin, our neighbors are bothered, we can't let him do that on deck as MANY people will be bothered.

 

I'm so scared of a meltdown and having 100s of eyes watching what we do as there may not be anything to do.

 

Any been there done that suggestions for this worried mama????

[tonit964]

Although my kids are older, the youngest is 10. I would suggest trying to keep to the regular daily schedule as much as possible. I know that's hard on vacation but if you can keep nap and bedtime rituals as close to the norm that will probably help alot.

I make an effort to do this with my DD and it works for the most part and at 10, she still has meltdowns:D

Have a great cruise!

Toni

[reallyitsmema]

I agree that staying on a regular schedule definitely helps. Try not to let him get over tired or over stimulated. If you sense a tantrum coming on, I would try to remove him from the situation if possible and go sit and have some quiet time. Sometimes just snuggling in the corner with a book and a luvey makes a world of difference. Tantrums happen, ignore the people who give you looks, they aren't worth it. I would try not to have him scream for an hour in the cabin if possible. Try to talk him down, even that young you can rationalize with them, if you calm down, we will take a ride in the stroller and see if we can find any fish or birds.

 

Good luck and have a wonderful cruise.

[Kerry's Girls]

I was terrified about this as well, but I must say there's something about all the activity and the movement of the ship that creates a great sleeping environement, so we did two naps a day and no one every got over tired.

 

A walk around the promenade deck was my #1 choice for calming down. The wind, the sound of the ocean, enough room to keep moving all worked out really well.

 

Best,

Mia

[Warm Breezes]

My kids did not throw tantrums, but my nephew does and friends of ours had kids who did. I find most of the time the tantrum is to get their parent's attention. What I do to calm them down is to divert their attention to something else and engage them in some other activity. This takes active participation from the adult because if you ignore them or just try to hush them up, it seems to make the tantrums worse.

 

I agree if you have a child prone to tantrums that throwing them off their schedule does not help. They will need their sleep and their food at near normal times or you will face a cranky child trying to let you know they need sleep or food. If child is cranky because of teething make sure you have some children's tylenol to help them cope with pain. Try not to overstimulate them either. Make sure you have some downtime in their schedules. Good Luck.

[um5xno1]

Pre-cruise we trained our 15 m/o (at time of cruise) to watch a portable DVD player on mute. We would whip this out anytime, especially in the MDR, that she started to get a little peeved. Worked out great. I feel if we hadn't trained prior it wouldn't have been as effective. Still to this day, (now 2 y/o DD) watches DVD's while out to dinner if she gets fussy. The beauty of the whole thing is that its still on mute!

[sbhdmh]

My dd is 5 now but I always found it much better to try to avoid a tantrum rather than trying to calm her down after she got into one. Distraction and redirection worked wonders. We were very fortunate to have an amazingly social, happy baby but she was not a sleeper. We cruised on her first birthday and I don't recall a single nap the whole time so keeping her on schedule wasn't an option. There were so many new things to see and experience she was easy to redirect if I saw a problem coming on, though. The dvd idea is a great one - my dd discovered Shrek at 7 months old and it always worked like a charm. Taking walks between courses at dinner, having quite time with books and giving him a chance to burn energy doing things like dancing in the lounges when they are not too full may help. You will probably find that the staff is very eager to help, too. Many of them leave their little ones for months at a time and so they are eager to fawn all over babies on board. They might make napkin animals for you, especially ones that dance. My dd loved that. So look for clues to a tantrum coming on before it hits, redirect or distract as soon as one starts and keep yourself calm. We always have a period of "attitude reajustment" the first few days after we get back from a trip. DD has usually been off-schedule, tends to get less sleep , etc while traveling. We just accept that and know that things will be back to normal within 48 hours of returning home. Relax and enjoy. You'll have a great time no matter what happens.

[Essiesmom]

Check out the ship, and the daily program. Locate all the lounges. there are places, such as the aft lounge, and the disco, that are rarely used during the day. I he melts early on, instead of going to the cabin, seek out one of those places. Those places have lots of space to run around, dance, etc. My niece found a lounge where her daughter could dance around on the dance floor to her heart's content. she was five at the time. Even Circle C or Club O2 might be empty at times. Some areas, like the disco, might have lighted floors that would fascinate him. How about riding in the glass elevators? EM

[Ula]

First do not borrow trouble, new parents tend to do that. Your child might be the perfect angel. But good triggers for "meltdowns" are over stimulation and being over tired. Respect the nap, and make sure your child, unless they are a huge social butterfly and some are, has some quiet areas to recharge in. Also a small stroller that they can go to sleep in helps a lot.

The social ones like that, they get upset if they think they are missing out on the action. That way they are part of the action and can just fall asleep like kids will do.

[um5xno1]

Check out the ship, and the daily program. Locate all the lounges. there are places, such as the aft lounge, and the disco, that are rarely used during the day. I he melts early on, instead of going to the cabin, seek out one of those places. Those places have lots of space to run around, dance, etc. My niece found a lounge where her daughter could dance around on the dance floor to her heart's content. she was five at the time. Even Circle C or Club O2 might be empty at times. Some areas, like the disco, might have lighted floors that would fascinate him. How about riding in the glass elevators? EM

 

 

We did the same....we would taek DD into the empty lounge for her to walk around, play on the interesting chairs, look at the decor, etc. Much more room for everyone to strech out other than the cabin. Also, we tried to keep her out of the cabin as much as possible, this way, her perception of the cabin was that is was "her room" and always associated it with sleeping and changing.

[junglejane]

I would just add that in the MDR, at least look like you're trying to do something, and take the child out if she or she is having a total meltdown. We were on the Mariner of the Seas on March 7. Our 2 DD's are 9 and 13 -- thankfully past the meltdown stage. There were actually lots of tables with kids around us. I don't know if we were in a designated family ghetto or if it was just Spring Break and the early seating. But near us was one particular table with an extended family group that included two babies in high chairs and a toddler. One of the babies cried and screamed a lot over several nights. It always seemed like the family just tuned him out. My DH was seated with his back to this table, and one night he said: "What are they doing over there? Poking the baby with a fork?"

 

It was just a little maddening that no one at that table seemed concerned about the tables around them. We were at a table for 6 and our tablemates were a husband and wife who were 79 years old (we didn't know them beforehand). They cruise frequently on the Mariner and had requested this specific table, no doubt having no idea they'd be around so many families, LOL. They were beside themselves over the screaming baby, and tried several times to get our 13 year old to go over to the other table to complain (we vetoed that idea).

[geegee1]

Since you're probably going to have a stroller with you, once it seems like it might be meltdown time, put the child in the stroller and begin to walk around. If you are walking around the ship and the child is still screaming, keep on walking. Most people will not give you dirty looks if they see that you are doing something to make the meltdown to stop.

 

Two cruises ago our youngest was 7 months old and decided not sleep through the night for the first time in months. I put her in the stroller and walked around. Ended up taking a nap in one of the lounges from 4a to until she fell back asleep.

[1bellamarie]

Thank you so much for the words of encouragement! I'm pretty sure we can handle this but I just don't want to be "those" parents. We rarely let him just cry and cry even at home so I can't see us doing that on ship. I guess I worry about those times when all the comfort in the world won't help...it happens you know.

 

We've kind of resolved to not eat in the MDR except for breakfast and lunch...just to check it out. We're planning on SUPER casual so MDR wouldn't be appropriate for dinner anyway.

 

Thank you again!!!