cruisers w/out children

[tiff123]

Is it just me..... or does anyone else get the impression that (particularly older couples cruising) tend to turn their noses up at couples travelling with children?

 

I know there are many grandparents that travel with their grandchildren and kudos to them - this is not directed at them.

 

I keep seeing all these anti-children posts lately. One thread's posts seemed particularly insulting. Maybe its just me???? :confused: Has anyone else noticed this before?

[utseabee]

I think it is message boards in general. I've been on DISNEY boards where childless people actually suggest that small children don't belong at Disneyland.

Some stuff you just kind of have to shrug off.

[cb at sea]

I'm "older" without kids coming on vacation with me...and I truly don't care if there are kids or not. As long as I don't have to deal with them, I'm fine! I've never been bothered or "put out" by other people's kids. They are quite easy to ignore.

 

Folks with children in tow have a totally different cruise experience than folks traveling without kids. To each their own!

 

If you really don't want to even SEE a child, then cruising on either a luxury line (where few parents can afford to travel with extended family) or not cruising is the only option! Kids are everywhere! And that's fine!

 

I don't understand why folks are so concerned with the age of their fellow travelers, either!

[allstarzz]

What I find most shocking isn't the fact that some posters do not care much for kids but the number who look on and condone the anti-kid mentality.

 

Some almost have me convince that there is a pervert or every deck if my kids are allowed to leave my side. Anything to keep the kids under wraps.

[Keith1010]

I don't think this is anything new. There are some who do not like to cruise with kids and others who do.

 

Keith

[allstarzz]

In general, the number of people condoning the put-down of kids has increased as eveident with the kind of response on some of these threads. It takes a community to raise a child is no longer in the conscienousness of many people especially (GOF) grumpy old farts who still think cruising is for the old and cold and nearly dead. There are people who do not feel comfortbale cruising with elderly, disabled, blacks, whites, New Yorkers, Southerns, or gays to name a few but they would not dear say so w/o being flamed or appear to be prejudice:eek:

 

Suck for kids but if they were anmials they would have PETA , elderly - AARP. disabled- ADA

[cosmolulu1]

I just came back from a Carnival cruise with 3 kids, 3 yrs and under. It amazes me how people expect that there won't be any children on board or annoyed with them in general when Carnival caters to kids. My kids spent time at Camp Carnival, I also brought a babysitter along with me. My baby did not even go into to formal dining room, he ate at the buffet. So many people were so kind and friendly to them. I'd say for the most part.

There were a few people that were just openly just airing their disgust for children. Case in point, we went to the lido deck buffet where there were tons of tables empty. A couple chooses to sit right next to us and tsk tsk if one of my kids even raise their voice. So I'd say, you will always get a few bad apples that outwardly look for trouble. For the most part, people were really so nice, they all met some nice friends in the camp, it was great.

I did notice babies with diapers in the hot tub, at the piano bar or bars all the time with parents late and thought that this was inappropriate.

[Onessa]

There are a lot of people on the boards who simply like to complain. Kids are an easy target (as are formal nights, chair hogs, and people who share drink packages :D). On board I've really found little or no issue with any anti-kid biases.

 

I do think that one bad kid experience for many adults will make them "paint" all kids as "bad" -- that seems to happen on-land as well as at-sea.

[tiff123]

Yes I think you are right - I think they see one kid in a diaper in the jacuzzi and suddenly all of us parents are evil and out to ruin their vacation. Or they are the type of GOF that can't handle a kid that walks and talks.:p

[beachchick]

I just came back from a Carnival cruise with 3 kids, 3 yrs and under. It amazes me how people expect that there won't be any children on board or annoyed with them in general when Carnival caters to kids. My kids spent time at Camp Carnival, I also brought a babysitter along with me. My baby did not even go into to formal dining room, he ate at the buffet. So many people were so kind and friendly to them. I'd say for the most part.

There were a few people that were just openly just airing their disgust for children. Case in point, we went to the lido deck buffet where there were tons of tables empty. A couple chooses to sit right next to us and tsk tsk if one of my kids even raise their voice. So I'd say, you will always get a few bad apples that outwardly look for trouble. For the most part, people were really so nice, they all met some nice friends in the camp, it was great.

I did notice babies with diapers in the hot tub, at the piano bar or bars all the time with parents late and thought that this was inappropriate.

 

I'm glad you had a good time. It's so great when families can enjoy cruising together and it's usually such a great break for mom (and dad) from the day-to-day of cooking, cleaning, laundry, etc.

 

I do need to quibble about one thing. Carnival certainly is very child friendly and does market to families with children, but Carnival does not cater only to children (or that is, families with children). Carnival also markets and caters to honeymooners, couples who want a romantic getaway, young adults traveling with friends, retired people, and other demographics. That's why there are so many different things to do onboard and why the websites and brochures show not just children having fun, but many other types of passengers. I mention this because there are some parents with young children who say, "Cruising is for families, so everyone else shut up" (or words to that effect). Mind you, I am not--absolutely not--saying you are one of those parents; just pointing out how it can sometimes seem to others. For my money, respect on all sides is critical. That is what makes a fun time for everyone.

 

I am a parent and grandparent, but unless we cruise with our granddaughter (haven't yet as we decided to wait until she is a tad older), my husband and I cruise during times when there are likely to be fewer children onboard. It's simply our preference and not at all a statement about children or families or that children shouldn't be on cruises. Of course they should!

 

Sadly though, it's things such as the swim diapers in defiance of health regulations, parents who insist on bringing their young children into late night adult-style entertainment, and so on that set off some of the grumpy folks. And sadly, I think Onessa is right that some people use one bad experience to "color" all parents and children. I always remind people that one obnoxious/rude/out of control child or one clueless/rude parent does not mean that all children and parents are like that--Most are absolutely not. Not anymore than all older passengers are grumpy/complainers/kid haters. It's sad that some (on both ends of the equation) seem to thrive on sweeping generalizations or let one bad experience (say, a screaming toddler whose parents ignore him/her or one grumpy adult who rants about children onboard even though the children are doing nothing wrong) color what they believe.

 

All passengers--including parents and their children--have a right to expect a happy, pleasant, and positive experience onboard. I hope you continue to have wonderful cruises and let the negative stuff just roll off...some people are never happy unless they have something to be unhappy about.

 

beachchick

[tiff123]

You are right beachchick. Well said! I think you fly those statements around like a banner throughout the boards!;)

[beachchick]

You are right beachchick. Well said! I think you fly those statements around like a banner throughout the boards!;)

 

Thanks. It's easy because I really mean them. I can honestly say that we've never had a truly bad experience with children (or their parents) onboard any ship. True, we don't cruise during spring break, holidays, or summer because we know that there will be loads of families. We don't want to become like some of the grumpos who complain and we know ourselves well enough to know that 1,000 children onboard out of 2,800 passengers wouldn't suit us. And we don't want to interfere with children and parents having the time of their lives by ending up grumpy ourselves. But the children we have seen and met onboard have usually been quite nice. It's fun to see them having a good time.

 

beachchick

[celle]

I'm glad you had a good time. It's so great when families can enjoy cruising together and it's usually such a great break for mom (and dad) from the day-to-day of cooking, cleaning, laundry, etc.

 

I do need to quibble about one thing. Carnival certainly is very child friendly and does market to families with children, but Carnival does not cater only to children (or that is, families with children). Carnival also markets and caters to honeymooners, couples who want a romantic getaway, young adults traveling with friends, retired people, and other demographics. That's why there are so many different things to do onboard and why the websites and brochures show not just children having fun, but many other types of passengers. I mention this because there are some parents with young children who say, "Cruising is for families, so everyone else shut up" (or words to that effect). Mind you, I am not--absolutely not--saying you are one of those parents; just pointing out how it can sometimes seem to others. For my money, respect on all sides is critical. That is what makes a fun time for everyone.

 

I am a parent and grandparent, but unless we cruise with our granddaughter (haven't yet as we decided to wait until she is a tad older), my husband and I cruise during times when there are likely to be fewer children onboard. It's simply our preference and not at all a statement about children or families or that children shouldn't be on cruises. Of course they should!

 

Sadly though, it's things such as the swim diapers in defiance of health regulations, parents who insist on bringing their young children into late night adult-style entertainment, and so on that set off some of the grumpy folks. And sadly, I think Onessa is right that some people use one bad experience to "color" all parents and children. I always remind people that one obnoxious/rude/out of control child or one clueless/rude parent does not mean that all children and parents are like that--Most are absolutely not. Not anymore than all older passengers are grumpy/complainers/kid haters. It's sad that some (on both ends of the equation) seem to thrive on sweeping generalizations or let one bad experience (say, a screaming toddler whose parents ignore him/her or one grumpy adult who rants about children onboard even though the children are doing nothing wrong) color what they believe.

 

All passengers--including parents and their children--have a right to expect a happy, pleasant, and positive experience onboard. I hope you continue to have wonderful cruises and let the negative stuff just roll off...some people are never happy unless they have something to be unhappy about.

 

beachchick

 

I agree with everything you say, beachchick.

 

We are retired and don't mind cruising with kids, as long as they are supervised by their parents.

 

However, we have just come off a cruise where there were lots of kids, of many different nationalities. One family - and only one family amongst them all - was enough to try the patience of many other cruisers on board.

 

This woman had 2 small girls (aged about 2 and 4) and never seemed to have any control over them. In the theatre (late performance) these 2 little girls ran around, screamed and yelled for the entire show and their mother did nothing to prevent them. Worse, she did not remove them and people sitting near her were leaving the theatre to escape the constant noise.

 

Another day, we went to a lecture which was accompanied by a slide show. The same 2 little darlings repeated their behavior in the theatre and were so loud that people could not hear the guest lecturer. People near her told the mother to "get those children out of here". She just shrugged and the noise continued.

 

The last straw was when we were lining up to get off the ship in a port. This same woman actively pushed the front of her pushchair into the legs of a woman who was moving slowly with a walker, in an attempt to make the disabled woman walk faster.

 

This one woman and her uncontrolled kids upset so many passengers that I can quite understand how some people get to feel that they don't want to cruise with children.

 

I love kids, but please remember that, in the confined space of a cruise ship, you need to be responsible for ensuring that your kids don't spoil the cruise experience of other passengers. I'm not aiming this at anyone on this board, because I'm sure you are the responsible parents who plan ahead and do research, to make cruising the best experience for all.

[cosmolulu1]

I did want to clarify my statement when I said that Carnival caters to kids, I didn't mean exclusively but I still think that if I wanted to avoid kids or run ins with annoying kids -- I wouldn't choose Carnival. As a parent that kept my kids tucked away in Camp Carnival, with a babysitter and supervising myself in the pool, on excursions I can say there were loads of kids running around. If I were to take a trip alone with my husband, I wouldn't choose this line because it seemed to me that even the night time activities like Karaoke in the bar said "ALL AGES" until 10:30, comedy shows, variety shows everything. Even when my husband and I were away from our kids, there were babies in strollers crying everything at these shows.

As annoying as some kids are when parents let them act up and don't remove them from the situation, I don't think it will be policed unless the ship itself limits more of the activities to adults only.

[4boysnus]

I love kids - have a bunch of them myself. What I don't like is parents who bring their kids on vacation and insist on also taking a vacation from parenting.

 

When DH and I take a family vacation we expect to parent the children we brought into this world (and any friend they bring along). When we need a break from parenting we take our vacation alone. The kids don't have to go everywhere with us but when they do I cut them no slack. I do not allow running in the hallways, being loud to the point of obnoxiousness, bad table manners, the mouth, the attitude, not watching where they are going, or glutonouse behavior at the buffet or with soda. Futhermore, I haven't opened a door myself since my oldest was 5 - so 16 years. My boys hold the door for ladies - sometimes to the point where we are late for something. I want them to have a great cruise and my older ones are allowed limited run of the ship. They must be in by 12, they must leave sticky notes when they go somewhere, we eat breakfast and dinner as a family and do shore excursions together. I am strict but my kids always have a great time. I trust them because I am repeatedly told what well behaved gentlemen I have. It also helps that we homeschooled for 8 years. This is the 2 middle boys first day of public school. So we'll see. My hope is that its all habit by now and ingrained in their personalities.

 

Anywho, that's just my 2 cents. Its not that hard to set boundries and follow up with consequences. Believe me when I say that once you get there, spending time with the kids is a joy. We all respect each other and take each others feelings into consideration. Sure the boys argue. We don't stop them from voicing their feelings but they communicate it in a little more mature way.

 

Now on a cruise or land vacation, when little ones start acting up, as long as the parent removes the child if the child becomes a distraction in a show, it is fine with me. They are little, everything is new and a little scary, lots of strangers, constant stimulation, just to name a few. I respect a parent who holds their ground to a point, but when they are little they are usually acting that way because they're tired. Put the kid in bed and if that's too much to deal with, if you're afraid you will miss something, leave the kids with Grandma next time.

 

Sorry this is so long but I've seen too many parents on cruises, sacrifice the health and comfort of their child so they could see a show, hang out in a smokey bar and drink or whatever. Granted my cruises are the shorter, party cruises so maybe that attracts the younger, still partying parents. I don't know. It's just plain wrong.

 

:) Kerry

[tiff123]

Celle - we would have been right there with you asking the woman to remove her children from the theater. It is not right to disrupt an entire theater full of people. But most parents wouldn't let their kids do that! Unfortunately we all seem to be cast in that light with some people. :rolleyes:

[griffy116]

My Grandson was 4 on our 1st cruise. He is the youngest. He's now 17 and we are still cruising and have one planned on FOS next summer. He's the caboose...no more little ones in the family. Obviously I'm an oldie, retired, but we love to see the kids in the Pirates Parade and sitting at dinner with their parents, playing in the pool. It reminds us of when ours were that age and actually WANTED to spend time with us on the cruise. He's a veteran cruiser and now does his own thing and the teens now have their own cabin across from us. There are so many thoughtful parents on the cruiselines. The kids are adorable and when they slide over to you on a tender or in the ice cream line, the parents will try to pull them back. We always explain that we like and miss the attention of a little one. There is occasionally a group of kids..usually tweens who push into elevators, push all the buttoms or you see running in the Promenade. There are also the oldie who breaks in line, handles the rolls before choosing one and you hear making rude remarks just because they feel they've earned the right. I've even seen oldies who have told the kids to move out of their way, let them pass them in line and have a general sense of entitlement. A few years back we took a 12 day cruise on Legend of the Seas to Hawaii. We still call it the "blue hair cruise" because it was predominently OLD, VERY OLD, and OLDER cruisers. It was the most ill mannered group of cruisers we've ever encountered, as a whole, on any cruise. It was cold, windy bad weather one morning and we found our two tweens quietly playing a game of cards in the card room and overheard a couple of these questioning what "they" were doing in there. The room was empty, for God's sake. They were trying to find something to do to amuse themselves that was quiet, not bothering anyone. The ship allowed the kids to go to the Solarium because of the bad weather and you would have thought it had been invaded by lepers :eek: from the openly hostile attitude, and they were the only ones who wanted to be in the water. They weren't misbehaving and we made sure we were there to supervise. I agree with another poster that it's politically ok to complain about children. You'll see a post on every cruise line and the general boards asking about an "Adults Only" cruise. I encourage these folks to try to find one because those are the people "sucking the life out of the cruise..." not the kids. Enjoy taking your kids on the cruises; ignore those that complain on the boards. You are making memories that can't be replaced. Your children are learning good manners and etiquette and how to conduct themselves that will do them well as they grow up. How boring it would be to have a beautiful ship without any families with children onboard. Please don't let it discourage you.

[Onessa]

. . . This woman had 2 small girls (aged about 2 and 4) and never seemed to have any control over them. In the theatre (late performance) these 2 little girls ran around, screamed and yelled for the entire show and their mother did nothing to prevent them. Worse, she did not remove them and people sitting near her were leaving the theatre to escape the constant noise.

 

Another day, we went to a lecture which was accompanied by a slide show. The same 2 little darlings repeated their behavior in the theatre and were so loud that people could not hear the guest lecturer. People near her told the mother to "get those children out of here". She just shrugged and the noise continued.

 

The last straw was when we were lining up to get off the ship in a port. This same woman actively pushed the front of her pushchair into the legs of a woman who was moving slowly with a walker, in an attempt to make the disabled woman walk faster.

 

This one woman and her uncontrolled kids upset so many passengers that I can quite understand how some people get to feel that they don't want to cruise with children. . .

 

This story points out that it really isn't the kids, it is the parent (an adult). The adult brings the kids to a venue that may not be appropriate for the kids - and then does not remove the kids when it becomes obvious that it is not the right venue. And it is the adult running over little old ladies with walkers, not the kids. :D

[Warm Breezes]

This story points out that it really isn't the kids, it is the parent (an adult). The adult brings the kids to a venue that may not be appropriate for the kids - and then does not remove the kids when it becomes obvious that it is not the right venue. And it is the adult running over little old ladies with walkers, not the kids. :D

 

Kids learn by example...In most cases if you see disrespectful kids, you'll find disrespectful parents...If you see respectful kids, you'll find respectful parents. That loud drunk adult cutting in line at the buffet is probably the proud parent to those loud kids playing elevator tag and blocking the stairs. Just sayin'. :D

[tiff123]

My Grandson was 4 on our 1st cruise. He is the youngest. He's now 17 and we are still cruising and have one planned on FOS next summer. He's the caboose...no more little ones in the family. Obviously I'm an oldie, retired, but we love to see the kids in the Pirates Parade and sitting at dinner with their parents, playing in the pool. It reminds us of when ours were that age and actually WANTED to spend time with us on the cruise. He's a veteran cruiser and now does his own thing and the teens now have their own cabin across from us. There are so many thoughtful parents on the cruiselines. The kids are adorable and when they slide over to you on a tender or in the ice cream line, the parents will try to pull them back. We always explain that we like and miss the attention of a little one. There is occasionally a group of kids..usually tweens who push into elevators, push all the buttoms or you see running in the Promenade. There are also the oldie who breaks in line, handles the rolls before choosing one and you hear making rude remarks just because they feel they've earned the right. I've even seen oldies who have told the kids to move out of their way, let them pass them in line and have a general sense of entitlement. A few years back we took a 12 day cruise on Legend of the Seas to Hawaii. We still call it the "blue hair cruise" because it was predominently OLD, VERY OLD, and OLDER cruisers. It was the most ill mannered group of cruisers we've ever encountered, as a whole, on any cruise. It was cold, windy bad weather one morning and we found our two tweens quietly playing a game of cards in the card room and overheard a couple of these questioning what "they" were doing in there. The room was empty, for God's sake. They were trying to find something to do to amuse themselves that was quiet, not bothering anyone. The ship allowed the kids to go to the Solarium because of the bad weather and you would have thought it had been invaded by lepers :eek: from the openly hostile attitude, and they were the only ones who wanted to be in the water. They weren't misbehaving and we made sure we were there to supervise. I agree with another poster that it's politically ok to complain about children. You'll see a post on every cruise line and the general boards asking about an "Adults Only" cruise. I encourage these folks to try to find one because those are the people "sucking the life out of the cruise..." not the kids. Enjoy taking your kids on the cruises; ignore those that complain on the boards. You are making memories that can't be replaced. Your children are learning good manners and etiquette and how to conduct themselves that will do them well as they grow up. How boring it would be to have a beautiful ship without any families with children onboard. Please don't let it discourage you.

 

If only there were more out there like you!!!!

[Cheryl H]

I was a little afraid of the same negative comments when we cruised with our 3 year old last time. I was so hoping our table mates would be okay with being seated with us. It ended up wonderful.

 

Our son was a little man at the table. He did very well. We did not take him to any shows after dinner. But that was fine. It is a different vacation with a child along. We ended up splurging for a larger cabin since we would be in more.

 

I was afraid about the tours too. We got on a motorcoach and we were the only ones with a child along. So we sat all the way in the back. But our son didn't make a peep. But next time we aren't sitting clear back there. The exhaust fumes and engine noise made it not so great back there, not to mention being next to the restroom. Ugh.

 

We are gearing up for our next cruise with him (Alaska, he'll be 6). It should be great fun!

[G&TQ]

Love kids, love kids on cruises we are planning my sons first cruise and he is 6. Having said that I hate the parents and are annoyed with the children when they keep me from enjoying my self. First cruise some kids started a food fight. It would have been fine if a hamburger did not end up in my lap and my book. Their dad did not say a word until he caught my eye and then he shrugged and said we are on vacation. He never apologize never asked to do take care of a cleaning fee or anything. We love to eat out and never changed after my son was born we know there is a chance one of us would eat cold food it is something we except as parents. If my son acts up it is out side, when he was an infant if he was fussy it was out side. We call it an attitude adjustment. And have been stopped plenty of times by others for nipping it in the bud. My son now comments on the other kids needing an attitude some times loud enough they hear.. makes me laugh my 6yo knows more about parenting then some folks.

[tiff123]

Yes I agree. Being a former foster parent, I have seen the worst of the worst parents out there. We are pretty strict with our kids and teach them about respect and being polite. But every parent says that. I won't lie and say they never make mistakes. I'd say 10% of the time I have to step in and remind them. I think most parents do. No kids are perfect! There is always room for improvement.

[Warm Breezes]

Love kids, love kids on cruises we are planning my sons first cruise and he is 6. Having said that I hate the parents and are annoyed with the children when they keep me from enjoying my self. First cruise some kids started a food fight. It would have been fine if a hamburger did not end up in my lap and my book. Their dad did not say a word until he caught my eye and then he shrugged and said we are on vacation. He never apologize never asked to do take care of a cleaning fee or anything. We love to eat out and never changed after my son was born we know there is a chance one of us would eat cold food it is something we except as parents. If my son acts up it is out side, when he was an infant if he was fussy it was out side. We call it an attitude adjustment. And have been stopped plenty of times by others for nipping it in the bud. My son now comments on the other kids needing an attitude some times loud enough they hear.. makes me laugh my 6yo knows more about parenting then some folks.

lol...all I need to say to my kids when the attitude starts to appear is "attitude...adjust it now." Start it when they are young and a word is all it takes when they are older (mine are now 13 and 16).

[Cuizer2]

Is it just me..... or does anyone else get the impression that (particularly older couples cruising) tend to turn their noses up at couples travelling with children?

 

I know there are many grandparents that travel with their grandchildren and kudos to them - this is not directed at them.

 

I keep seeing all these anti-children posts lately. One thread's posts seemed particularly insulting. Maybe its just me???? :confused: Has anyone else noticed this before?

 

It is not just cruising. I read where someone was upset because there were children on the same airplane. Seems schedule their vacations during school time and were very upset that there were children on their flight.

 

Bottom line, you are going to find all kinds in this world. Just try and roll with the punches.