Maiden Auntie -- Asking for Trouble??

[Sauer-kraut]

Am I taking on too much by bringing a niece and invited friend (8 year olds) on a 7-day to Bermuda on the NCL Star?

 

I really want to take my niece on a cruise and I figured if she invited a friend she'd have at least someone she knows to play with. I am very kid friendly so the biggest unknown for me is the 'friend' that comes along. I see my niece once or twice a year, so there isn't a huge contact between us.

 

Any thoughts you might want to put down in terms of:

• warnings
  
• ideas
  
• reassurance
  
• drop the entire idea!
  

 

Thanks I really appreciate it!

[gerif]

I'd take the niece but forget about the friend. She will meet playmates in the kids club. Too much responsibility taking a strange kid. Suppose they have a falling out? Girls do at that age. You and your niece will have a fine time together.

[dsrdsrdsr]

Do you have a specific 8-year-old friend in mind? It might be tricky finding parents willing to let her go with someone they've never met.

 

As for your niece, you know her better than us. If her parents are entirely happy with the idea, I dare say it'll be fine.

[Sauer-kraut]

Do you have a specific 8-year-old friend in mind? It might be tricky finding parents willing to let her go with someone they've never met.

 

As for your niece, you know her better than us. If her parents are entirely happy with the idea, I dare say it'll be fine.

 

Yes, I forgot to mention that the friend would be someone I don't know, as I am not a constant presence in my niece's life (they live out East and I am in the Midwest).

 

I just thought that my niece is shy it might be more fun for her to have someone along she knows. As for the kid's club it will be the week before labor day and I'm sure there are a lot of schools already in session, ours go back mid-August.

[chrisc71]

I would forget about the friend. No offense to you but I also doubt anyone would allow their 8 year old to go away with someone they never met.

 

As far as the kids club; schools in the NY/NJ/CT area do not go back until after Labor Day so they should still be a good number of children in the clubs.

 

Go with you niece and enjoy each other.

[cb at sea]

I think it's a lovely idea, to take your niece! She will meet kids in the club...just go the 1st night when EVERYONE is new to each other! Even "shy" kids will find things to do and other kids to meet!

 

I had an aunt who I didn't see frequently, but when we did, it was great! I still have fond memories of some of the things we did together when I was young (and shy!)

[6rugrats]

Agree; take the niece and leave her friend at home. Even if the parents let her go, it's just too much of a responsibility. Part of the growing up process is trying new things, such as the kid's club and learning it can be survived and that you can even have fun, despite your shyness.

[rebeccalouiseagain]

absolutely just take your neice sans friend. She won't need to bring a friend. I travel all the time with my son and he loves the youth program.

 

There is a very real possibility one or both of the kids could get sick. That would be miserable. I wouldn't want the added responsibility of another child. It will limit what you and your niece can do.

 

I guarantee if she brings a friend there will be drama.

[Prinycesa07]

Just bring the niece so she can have some alone time with her awesome auntie that she doenst see very often :)

[Mom2B&Z]

ITA just bring your niece. In addition to what everyone else has said, I would never let my DS1 (who is 7.5 yrs) leave the country for 7 days with a friend and someone I have never met.

Go, have a great time, plan to do some things together and definitely see if she wants to check out the kids club on the first night. My boys have always made friends quickly at the pool or kids club, and they are shy and from a town of 9000 people ;)

[donaldsc]

If you do decide to take the friend (which I would not do), there is a bunch of legal paperwork that must be completed and may turn off the child's parents - authority to take her oout of the country; authority to make medical decisions when the parents are not present; a copy of the child's health insurance card, etc. Just make sure that in your effort to be a good aunt, you do not get yourself in trouble.

 

DON

[spunkyhungry]

Do you have another young relative you could take instead of the friend? Such as another niece/nephew or your niece's siblings or cousins? Their parents might be more likely to get them go, and since they're family, they'll be solid cruising partners for your niece.

 

If not, I'm sure you will have a good time, but if your niece is shy she might not feel comfortable going with just you. I was always shy, and I don't think I would have gone away from my parents for a whole week with a relative I didn't know well. Is it possible for you to spend more time with her before the cruise to get to know each other better? If you can't get together in person you could try sending her emails or actual letters and pictures of your life. You could also consider taking one of your niece's parents with you two.

[Sauer-kraut]

You guys are really helpful! The advice you give is great, and to know that there will still be schools out for summer the time my niece is takes a load off my mind. (I was seriously thinking there might only be 20 children on board at that time).

 

SpunkyHungry you are right about taking the sibling along, but there are medical issues there and strict dietary requirements which are hard enough to deal with on land at home, let alone on a cruise ship. I also wanted to bring my niece for a bit of "alone time" as everyone tends to focus more on the sibling.

 

I also was thinking about parent releases and power of attorney (or whatever) for the friend and it was weighing on my mind, what if something did happen, not a position I would want to find myself in at all. Plus, I'd save the 3rd person fare which is always a consideration as well.

 

Again, thanks every comment is greatly appreciated. :)

[rebeccalouiseagain]

Here are some of the bonding experiences we have had on a cruise...

 

Take her to the spa for a pedicure. This is a special treat for a little girl.

 

I used to love it when my Aunt did my hair for me while I was on vacation.

 

She may really get involved with the kids program and you may feel like you are traveling solo. They do have opportunities to interact with the youth program- scavenger hunts and dance parties. Go you'll meet other people. I find that I meet more people when my son is with me because kids are a great ice breaker.

 

Take her to Trivia- they often have questions that school age kids know. They also have pictionary games and other games that you can both enjoy.

 

My son had his first "Shirley Temple" on a cruise and now that is his signature drink. They love getting Virgin drinks too. But limit these to "happy hour". Don't do soda cards- that's like encouraging them to drink countless sodas- which will make her hyper and possibly bind her up.

 

Do have downtime every day. I call it rest time- where we adjourn to the cabin from say 2-4. If she sleeps great but I call it quiet time. Where we read and rest.

[bplazo]

I have always taken a friend of my daughter's on a cruise because she has always had a better time, however, since you would not know the friend or her parents and they do not know you, then I would say just take your niece. I would not want the responsibility.

[rebeccalouiseagain]

It really depends on the age. One thing I noticed is when I started taking my friend with me to my aunt's house, I totally ignored my aunt. Looking back, I don't think it was fun for my aunt. She never said anything but I'm sure she felt excluded.

 

An aunt and niece don't have quantity time together- so this trip should be quality time with free time for both of you to interact with people your own ages.

[kitty9]

I know I would never allow my young child to take an out of the country vacation with an adult who's a stranger.

[Sauer-kraut]

Rebeccalouise -- such wonderful experiences and memories you both shared. Great ideas with what to do as well. :)

 

bplazo and kitty -- thank you as well for your thoughts. :)

[E&B]

I agree with everyone else. Leave the friend out of it. This can be a GREAT bonding experience for you and your niece, and not knowing the friend you don't know what you're getting into. My daughter has friends I would never want to spend a week with. They're nice enough, just not raised the way I would raise my kids - very spoiled.

[Sauer-kraut]

i agree with everyone else. Leave the friend out of it. This can be a great bonding experience for you and your niece, and not knowing the friend you don't know what you're getting into. My daughter has friends i would never want to spend a week with. They're nice enough, just not raised the way i would raise my kids - very spoiled.

 

:) :)

[Onessa]

I concur that the friend might be a bit too much to take on. When my DD was 8YO she went on a road trip with her BFF and the BFF's out-of-town aunt. I knew the BFF's parents well enough and had met the aunt a few times when she was babysitting for the kids while their parents were out-of-town. Both DD and this particular friend are absolute dreams to travel with.

 

DD is now 16YO and I have taken her with one or more friends on land trips on a variety of occassions (not to mention chaperoning athletic trips and band trips). I agree that there are some kids that i KNOW will not be invited and others I wish we had not invited.

 

If DN has a special friend with whom she has travelled with in the past very successfully, I would say you may want to consider it. But there really is not a good reason on a cruise to need to take a platemate along for her.

[sandytoes03]

Yes, forget the friend idea. She will meet friends, and even if she doesn't, she's there to hang out with you!:)