Learn How to Ask Nicely!

[rebeccalouiseagain]

I 've been reading reviews of Summit to Bermuda and I can say that I had a wonderful time and that no children bothered me in the slightest. That wasn't true in Alaska where there were probably fewer children but for some reason there were a couple of things that bothered me on that particular sailing. It didn't ruin my cruise but I was upset about some of the children who weren't being monitored by their parents.

 

But I digress...

 

What I did notice on Summit were some very rude adults. Now what do I mean by this?

 

Here is how you do talk to a crew member at the buffet...

 

First Smile you are on vacation no need to look like a sour puss and you'll get frown lines.

 

Crew Member "Yes madame/sir. What can I get for you?"

 

Polite passenger " I would like a steak please, medium rare and may I have some potatoes with that?

 

Rude passenger "Give me a steak. I want it medium- not too bloody and throw the potato on the grill. I want it crispy. I'll tell you when its done."

 

Well- this is an actual verbatim illustration of what I witnessed on Summit.

 

If you expect children to be polite- you better be showing them how.

 

I know it's a NYC thing to be direct but you can treat people how you would like to be treated.

 

If I walked up to you by the pool and said- move your stuff out of my way, I want to sit down. You'd punch me!

 

Manners are not exclusively for children.

[Hlitner]

Totally agree! We have seen too many adults behave like spoiled brats on ships and it sometimes gets us angry. Recently, on a long Prinsendam cruise we witnessed a gentleman (I use this term loosely) rudely order a variation of eggs benedict at breakfast. The passenger spoke to the cook like he was the passenger's slave. A nice lady, standing next to the man, quickly said to the cook, "I think he meant to say please!" The male passenger quickly turned a strange shade of red but did not say another word :).

 

Hank

[TeaBag]

Good for her.

[Tangocherie]

Totally agree! We have seen too many adults behave like spoiled brats on ships and it sometimes gets us angry. Recently, on a long Prinsendam cruise we witnessed a gentleman (I use this term loosely) rudely order a variation of eggs benedict at breakfast. The passenger spoke to the cook like he was the passenger's slave. A nice lady, standing next to the man, quickly said to the cook, "I think he meant to say please!" The male passenger quickly turned a strange shade of red but did not say another word :).

 

Hank

 

I'll have to remember that line. Great!:)

[3littlepigs]

We were at breakfast earlier this year when the chap next to us gave his order to the waiter, I was stunned at his manner, no please no thank you and delivered with a real sense of entitlement. He was perfectly charming to us chatting away. Turns out he was a retired 747 captain from a highly respected airline. Guess he was used to giving assertive directions and expecting instant results. I found his manner unacceptable and rude, particularly in the way he treated people differently depending on their circumstance. People are people, no matter what their chosen path in life, they all deserve the same respect and consideration.

[BrusselsGirl07]

I so agree. I have seen so many people being rude to the staff, making demands in an angry voice with no please or thankyou. Or speaking to the staff as if they were stupid. On our last cruise, the sushi station had been set up, but the blinds/dividers were still pulled down as it was not yet 5pm. A man squeezed behind the blinds, and as no tongs/servers had been put out yet, he just used his hands to pick up his sushi. So many times on a cruise I am astounded by the behaviour of some people. It just makes me even more determined to be extra pleasant and well mannered to everyone.

[Despegue]

3littlepigs,

 

I can assure you that not all B747 Captains are like that ;-)

But yep, some collegues of mine sadly have an attitude like you described. it is mostly a generational thing though, I find, at least in our Airline.:cool:

[Minoushka]

On our cruise on ocean princess our Filipino waiter always spoke harshly to my then 17 year old son

Every night he was solicitous with our table mattes but would ask my son in a rude tone ..ok what do you want

It bothered me because my son is quiet and reserved and was taken aback by the tone and attitude

I never said anything but he rubbed me the wrong way . I tip extra according to how nice waiters treat my kids .many do exactly that one in particular on .r.c.i adventure took such great care of my 7 year old .he was a wonderful thoughtful waiter and I was very generous with him .he treated all of us at the table with kindness and respect .lubo was the best

 

Michele

So it is not always pax who are rude

[Can'tstopcruising]

I hope I am not digressing too much! I am a big Please & Thank you person. It's automatic!

 

What drives me crazy is when in the U.S., a waiter/waitress or salesperson answers Unhuh! What's wrong with "You're welcome"?

 

One other thing. Don't forget the Tone of Voice speaks volumes.

[Lois R]

:eek:

I hope I am not digressing too much! I am a big Please & Thank you person. It's automatic!

 

What drives me crazy is when in the U.S.' date=' a waiter/waitress or salesperson answers Unhuh! What's wrong with "You're welcome"?

 

One other thing. Don't forget the Tone of Voice speaks volumes.[/quote']

 

We must have come from the same family somewhere:D:):);)

 

I was raised to always say please and thank you, without question.

I think (just my opinion) it goes to back to how a person is brought

up....manners or no manners?

[Rick-cruiser]

I don't know if it's just me...... but I subconsciously always seem to give people with service-related jobs even MORE respect and courtesy than those with less subservient-type jobs.... perhaps because I know what they must go through on a daily basis, and that other people probably treat them in a less-than-civilized manner?. Or perhaps it's because I am internally recognizing the fact that someone is "serving" me in some way....and spontaneously acknowledging my awareness of that is my involuntary reaction?. I don't know.. All I do know, is that I wholeheartedly appreciate their service - that they are making my cruise vacation that much more special..... and I guess it may give me a sense of some innate contentment if I am somehow able to make their day more pleasant - to overcompensate for others who may treat them in a rude or condescending manner.....because they don't deserve that - they deserve just the opposite.

 

- Rick

.

[Karynanne]

I too am astonished at the lack of Customer Service....anywhere! Not on Celebrity ships, but on land in general.

 

Good service means good training. I have a daughter (now 40) who started with Nordstrom Stores at age 16, as a part-timer. She ended up staying with the company all through college and another 16 years. She trained new employees in not only company policies, but language skills. If a company wants to succeed, train your employees. It starts at the top.

 

I believe you get what you give. The staff and crew onboard will bend over backwards to make sure your vacation experience is memorable. And they should be acknowledged with a smile and a hearty thank you.

 

Karyn

[Can'tstopcruising]

I too am astonished at the lack of Customer Service....anywhere! Not on Celebrity ships, but on land in general.

 

Good service means good training. I have a daughter (now 40) who started with Nordstrom Stores at age 16, as a part-timer. She ended up staying with the company all through college and another 16 years. She trained new employees in not only company policies, but language skills. If a company wants to succeed, train your employees. It starts at the top.

 

I believe you get what you give. The staff and crew onboard will bend over backwards to make sure your vacation experience is memorable. And they should be acknowledged with a smile and a hearty thank you.

 

Karyn

 

 

I love Nordstrom's!

 

I guess some people just don't know Please & Thank you. It doesn't matter much where they are or with whom they are dealing. Unless they are still young, they probably will not change. I am sure the crew is used to it and probably doesn't pay as much attention to it as you do (or anyone else who is not accustomed to dealing with the public).

 

Although I am polite, I certainly don't try to ingratiate myself because of others who are not polite (to Rick). We are responsible only for ourselves. Everybody, whatever their job, should work hard and do their best. I expect that. Sometimes their best isn't so great! When I was younger I tried to correct that. Now that I am so old and so wise, I just accept it!

[jwb3843]

I hope I am not digressing too much! I am a big Please & Thank you person. It's automatic!

 

What drives me crazy is when in the U.S.' date=' a waiter/waitress or salesperson answers Unhuh! What's wrong with "You're welcome"?

 

One other thing. Don't forget the Tone of Voice speaks volumes.[/quote']

 

My favorite response to a thank you is the Chick-fil-A way: It's my pleasure!

 

In my book there's never a good excuse to be rude to people who are going out of their way to serve you. Yes, they're being paid to do so, but they're not being paid to be treated like servants. That golden rule of treating others as you'd like to be treated should always be observed.

 

Julie

[Can'tstopcruising]

My favorite response to a thank you is the Chick-fil-A way: It's my pleasure!

 

In my book there's never a good excuse to be rude to people who are going out of their way to serve you. Yes, they're being paid to do so, but they're not being paid to be treated like servants. That golden rule of treating others as you'd like to be treated should always be observed.

 

Julie

 

What is chick fil a way? A chicken place?

[L11]

My father would reach out from the grave if I failed to say please and thank you!

 

Linda

[kat228]

You can be direct and polite at the same time. Being direct does not mean being rude.

[Tudorcruisers]

On Constellation last Sept a lady went to the MDR and asked for a table for two and they asked if she could wait as there were none free and she hadn't booked. She went completely ballistic and was just so rude and stormed off saying she would get someone who would get her into the MDR. I was totally shocked and felt so sorry for the man she had been screaming at as he seemed a bit shocked by it all.

[Can'tstopcruising]

On Constellation last Sept a lady went to the MDR and asked for a table for two and they asked if she could wait as there were none free and she hadn't booked. She went completely ballistic and was just so rude and stormed off saying she would get someone who would get her into the MDR. I was totally shocked and felt so sorry for the man she had been screaming at as he seemed a bit shocked by it all.[/quote

 

Obviously, this request was unreasonable. Either there is a table available or there isn't. Not much could be done about that. She must have had other issues.

 

An aside. Whenever someone is rude or nasty to you, chances are they are upset/angry about something of which you know nothing. We tend to be sensitive (me, anyway!) and internalize it, but in reality it probablty has nothing to do with us.

[jwb3843]

What is chick fil a way? A chicken place?

 

Chick-fil-A is a fast food restaurant chain that trains its staff to always respond with"It's my pleasure!" every time you say thank you.

 

Julie

[pianobar]

It is so nice to hear everyone's remarks on manners. We have never come upon a crew member on any cruise who was anything less than courteous, friendly and helpful...and we (including my children) have always made a point in returning the same.

 

We have often been embarrassed by the behaviour of some guests on a cruiseship toward the crew. I know I'm generalizing but the worst behaviour we've seen is from older guests who seem to have sense of entitlement. Of course the majority of all passengers are wonderful but it certainly gives you a bad feeling when you witness someone treating a crewmember like an inferior being.

 

"Here here" for manners and respect whether on a cruise ship or anywhere else for that matter!

[CELTICGIRLCRUISER]

Please and thank you are such basic manners and I mean basic. I agree with the lady that said it is about how you are brought up.

 

When I first came to the US I was amazed to hear folks in restaurants etc. order food/drink and ask for things without any manners, no please, no thank you and barking orders at the servers.

 

Then there is the letting doors go in your face, don't say thank you when you hold open for them and I could go on but you get the picture.

 

There are many boorish people around. If someone does something for me or shows me kindness in any way I make sure I thank them.

 

On a recent transatlantic flight on a US airline, I had a few drink and the conversation went like this:

 

Stewardess - Can I get you something to drink Ma'am?

 

Me- Yes please, I would like a whisky and lemonade please

 

Stewardess - Ice?

 

Me - Yes please

 

She hands me the glass, thank you I say, then thank you again when she hands me some peanuts.

 

Stewardess - Anything else I can get you?

 

Me - No thank you this is lovely.

 

Same thing happened each drink service, and later she came to my seat and said to me, you are one of the nicest passengers I have served, you are such a lovely person. I was touched, and all this was because I had said please and thank you a few times.

 

After that I listened to people around me ordering and suddenly though yes it was give me a beer or get me a coke and no please or thank you. I spoke to her later in the galley and she was definatily jaded from all the rude passengers you could tell.

 

Manners maketh man!

[EithneMay]

Totally agree! We have seen too many adults behave like spoiled brats on ships and it sometimes gets us angry. Recently, on a long Prinsendam cruise we witnessed a gentleman (I use this term loosely) rudely order a variation of eggs benedict at breakfast. The passenger spoke to the cook like he was the passenger's slave. A nice lady, standing next to the man, quickly said to the cook, "I think he meant to say please!" The male passenger quickly turned a strange shade of red but did not say another word :).

 

Hank

 

I would love to meet this woman!

 

 

Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

[rwr235]

Here's a quote I remember from my school days:

 

"Ceremonies are different in every country, but true politeness is everywhere the same". ~~Oliver Goldsmith~~

 

 

Could apply to several threads on here recently. I quite frequently ask my Cabin Stewards/other ship staff if they have any plans for the day. I ask if I can get them anything while I am ashore. I ask them later how their day was. It has nothing to do with cultures etc...it is called polite friendliness.

 

Similarly, there was a recent thread where the OP was commenting that on his last cruise...nobody said hello etc when getting on elevators...however, though that certainly happens...on the other hand I cannot recall a single time that someone has not responded to my greeting of Hello...if I say it first !!:D...on the elevators, in the passageways, in the crowded cafeteria etc.!!

 

So...say hello first !

Make friendly conversation...no matter how brief ! (this coming from a shy guy)

Be polite !

Smile !

Say Thank You and Please...in any language...the intention will be understood !!

 

Enjoy !

 

Woody

[swsfrail]

What drives me crazy is when in the U.S.' date=' a waiter/waitress or salesperson answers Unhuh! What's wrong with "You're welcome"?.[/quote']

 

A pet peeve of mine is when a wait person will reply "No problem" when I ask for extra napkins, a refill, etc. Of course it's not a problem!!!! It's your job, not a favor you are doing me!!!!!