How did my minor child get drunk on Ruby?

[Cruzin-K]

This is what I was referring too, who knows how old the boys were. I know my kids at that age wanted nothing to do with the teen center and refused to go anywhere near there.

 

The original departure port was New Jersey, something is missing here.

 

 

I didn't go back and stalk the OP"s post history, but

 

Maybe she was just talking about her son on the roll call for the cruise she canceled and just rounded up, after all he'd be 17 three weeks after the cruise. Really, who the hell cares?

 

If you bother to read the entire thread, you'd see that they canceled the EX cruise and switched to the Ruby. I'd much rather be cruising from Florida this time of year too :rolleyes:

 

There's an awful lot of jumping to really odd conclusions on this thread.

 

And really, because your teens didn't like the teen center, means that every other teenager in the universe has to feel the exact same way?

 

I will never understand how some people are so quick to jump all over other people and call them liars :confused:

 

I do think that bar servers should have to check the ID of anyone who looks to be under 30. You already have to carry around your cruise card, so what's one more card? Just keep them together.

 

edit: wanted to add this link. A lot of people on CC should give it a read.

 

http://themattwalshblog.com/2013/11/04/i-dont-agree-with-your-parenting-choices-now-let-me-explain-how-you-should-raise-your-own-children/

Edited January 4, 2014 by Cruzin-K

[MDSue]

After raising two children, I have learned that they can be quite skillful and adept at getting access to alcohol if they want it. I think that parents are fooling themselves if they think their teenagers are above misbehaving and experimenting with alcohol.

 

I would be upset if my teenager was found to be drunk and was booted from the teen club without a parent present, but I'd mostly be angry at my child. I believe it is impossible for the staff to act as police for everyone onboard. I've encountered many misbehaving teenagers on my cruises and often wish there was more intervention (never on Princess though).

 

Hopefully, your son has learned an important lesson after you grounded him for the rest of the trip (hopefully). While some would want to blame the staff for the indiscretion, others would be blaming the parent. Personally, I believe the teen alone was responsible for his actions.

 

Luckily, most teens grow up to be fine adults despite their teenage years. I know mine did.

[Pam in CA]

Princess isn't blameless here. They served underage kids alcohol according to the poster's son by allowing the one boy to use his father's card.

We don't know that for sure. And, if a 16YO looks 21, which can be the case, using someone else's card isn't going to raise a red flag. Sometimes, age is very hard to discern.

[greenie082756]

I think this has been a good topic for discussion and for others to read that will be bringing their teenage children with them on a cruise. Knowledge is power.

This has been informative which is what I like so much about CC.

:D

[Sunandseagrl]

Many years ago on one of our first cruises, We returned to the ship after a day in Jamaica with my husband and two children (young teens) and we all went out separate ways, planning to meet at the cabin to get ready for dinner later. As the ship pulled away, I jokingly said to my husband that I hoped our kids were still on the ship. They were but we learned that a group of young boys, including my son, left the ship before it sailed and did some rum tasting in the area right outside of the ship. I never dreamed that they would let unescorted children off the ship. I didn't think they would serve kids outside the ship. I didn't blame the cruise line. I blamed myself and my kid. But I can laugh about it now, and it is something we always remember about that cruise. Our kids are our responsibility and they are more clever than we give them credit for.

[Loonbeam]

Unfortunately, its not unusual for parents to send kids back to the ship for something so they don't have to run. The crew at the gangway has no idea whether the kid has permission or not. I could see them stopping a small child by themselves, but not a teen.

 

As I tend to do when these sort of things come up, I made a few calls.

 

Princess policy is all persons purchasing an alcoholic beverage who appear to be under 25 should be asked for supplemental ID. The cruise cards are only tagged under 18 and anyone presenting one of those cards for payment is refused. Of course that's a judgement call on appearance and as I noted can be very hard to enforce in a darkened venue like a dance area (which the under 18 crowd should not be able to enter).

 

If the teens purchased the drinks at a venue and it can be shown the server/bartender should have been aware of their age, that staff member will be released. If it was a situation in which they would have a hard time determining age, they may just be cautioned to be more aggressive with ID checks (needless to say, my contact cannot comment on a specific incident due to liability reasons)

 

As far as them being kicked out of the teen club and unescorted, while I could not get a firm policy quote, the standard for minors with alcohol seems to be if there is any concern about safety, security is to be called. If they are just being jerks, they will just be asked to leave and the responsible party notified (which appears to be the case in this matter, so I will assume the teen staff determined they were not inebriated enough to be at risk). The security holding area is not used for such incidents. If necessary, security does have the option of temporarily taking their key cards (they can leave the cabin once but not get back in I suppose)

 

Finally, if it is determined that the minor used an adults key card, both parties may be disembarked without compensation at the discretion of the captain, or all retail charging priveleges may be revoked on the adults and child's card. If the minor is using a lost or stolen cruise card, they will be disembarked and may be referred for criminal investigation.

 

 

 

Many years ago on one of our first cruises, We returned to the ship after a day in Jamaica with my husband and two children (young teens) and we all went out separate ways, planning to meet at the cabin to get ready for dinner later. As the ship pulled away, I jokingly said to my husband that I hoped our kids were still on the ship. They were but we learned that a group of young boys, including my son, left the ship before it sailed and did some rum tasting in the area right outside of the ship. I never dreamed that they would let unescorted children off the ship. I didn't think they would serve kids outside the ship. I didn't blame the cruise line. I blamed myself and my kid. But I can laugh about it now, and it is something we always remember about that cruise. Our kids are our responsibility and they are more clever than we give them credit for.

[Larlin]

I can understand how worried you must have been to be advised that your son had been kicked out of the teen club because he was drunk, and you didn't know where he was. Your concerns were real, as a man went overboard recently off a cruise ship east of Brisbane (no reasons given).

 

Thank you for raising this matter on CC to alert other parents.

 

You did the right thing by talking with management, who I hope will do the right thing by improving their policies on handling teenagers in the Teen Club.

 

Excellent post.

 

I think, too often, it is so easy for everyone to throw stones.

Edited January 4, 2014 by Larlin
Added

[Ethel5]

Or Grape "Tang" powder (the official drink of astronauts) and grain alcohol. Don't know if they even make that stuff any more. But I've "heard" about people mixing those two together.:o

 

For us it was grape Kool Aid and Tequila!

[xmasteach]

It is disappointing.....but once your son choose do drink, others actions really don't matter. Your son knew what was expected of him and the rules. He choose to disobey them. Just be glad he did not hurt anyone else or himself while he was drunk, then you all might have been leaving your crusie sooner than you expected.

 

I AGREE TOTALLY with this post.

 

I was on the same cruise. Being a HS teacher and dealing with teens daily, parents need to LOOK at their children and their actions. If they were put off in the Caymans, (which the cruise company has a right to do) what would they be crying about then. No one held their 16 year old down and forced booze into him. IT WAS HIS CHOICE.

Same as the question asked of teachers, "Why did YOU fail my child?" I didn't they choose to do nothing.

 

There were a large number of teens on the boat, most well behaved, and supervised by parents. Some not so.

[pcsunlover]

I AGREE TOTALLY with this post.

 

I was on the same cruise. Being a HS teacher and dealing with teens daily, parents need to LOOK at their children and their actions. If they were put off in the Caymans, (which the cruise company has a right to do) what would they be crying about then. No one held their 16 year old down and forced booze into him. IT WAS HIS CHOICE.

Same as the question asked of teachers, "Why did YOU fail my child?" I didn't they choose to do nothing.

 

There were a large number of teens on the boat, most well behaved, and supervised by parents. Some not so.

 

When any of my children came to me complaining about something a teacher, sibling or another child said or did, the first thing I asked is "and what did YOU do?" The whole story usually came out then, and we would discuss how the situation could or should have been handled. I learned this from my mom. She always said she didn't raise any angels, and neither did I. :)

 

That being said, I think when the parents couldn't be contacted in their cabin, they should have been paged and made aware of the situation immediately.

[RDC1]

It is not the responsibility of the people at the teen center.

 

They could have and probably should have called security and let them take custody of them.

 

They probably didn't because the crew tries to deal with such issues with a relatively light hand. If security had to come and take custody then it becomes a much more heavy handed issue and we would probably be seeing a message about the cruise line over reacting.

[4cats4me]

Perhaps cruises should be limited to those 21 and over and this wouldn't be an issue?:eek:

 

Okay, just kidding

[MauiLvrs]

Your son found a way to drink illegally on a cruise ship.

 

While it may be against line policy, in international waters ... not likely to be illegal...

[DMRick]

http://www.cruisecritic.com/news/news.cfm?ID=5402

 

I can see why a parent should be notified even if a page had to be given. I'd hate to see the kid just go to bed and no one realize he might have alcohol poisoning. This was a boy local to me.

[ldubs]

The FACTs are that ultimately its a parents responsibility to control their children and educate them on what is acceptable and what isn't. It isn't about Princess at all, its about who is responsible. PARENTS are responsible, period. Many of the problems our society has relate to parenting...or a lack of. People are always quick to blame everyone but themselves if their children go astray.

 

Hmmm -- so if I am understanding you correctly, if your underage child was served alcohol in a bar back in Colorado, you wouldn't hold that bartender at all responsible? I kind of doubt it.

[Ethel5]

Hmmm -- so if I am understanding you correctly, if your underage child was served alcohol in a bar back in Colorado, you wouldn't hold that bartender at all responsible? I kind of doubt it.

 

But if that kid presented a non-photo ID and looked the proper age, why would the bar tender be responsible? The point is that the kids lied, stole an ID and broke the law.

 

The other thing that I haven't seen addressed here is...just how "drunk" was this kid? Did they have one martini or 5? Martinis are an unusual drink for teens-they usually go for beer. They also like to act "drunker" than they really are just to show off.

[caitriona43]

I can understand the bartender may not realize the child was a minor( looked older etc)

But the teen club knew how old he was because you are not allowed in the teen club over 18.they should never sent the minor away .I think they should be in alot of trouble the minor could have falling over board thankfully he didn't the teen staff should have made sure the parents had ti collect the minor and bring him to the cabin an announcement in the intercom and I'm sure the parents would arrive very quickly a phone call is nit enough when theres no answer

Sent from my ST26i using Forums mobile app

[skf]

If it were to be discovered by a cruise line that a bartender had sold alcohol to a minor, I am sure the matter would be handled internally. The parents will never be informed of any action taken or not.

It is entirely possible that an adult purchased booze for the kid, for any number of reasons.

 

About 40 years ago the drinking age was changed to 18.The supermarket I worked at had clusters of Memorial High School students at 7:00 AM, following the 18-yr old seniors for their early-morning 6-pk.

If you want to give a teen an inspiring reason to get out of bed on time, is this a good choice?

[goose30]

Every one wants to know why the "child" was served alcohol. It has not been established as a fact that he was "served". His friend could have ordered it for him, he could have picked up a drink from an unattended table, he could have raided a mini bar. In those cases he would not have been "served".

 

What is fact is that he was stupid enough to go to the teen club after drinking. Seems to be a little lack of training (of the "child") somewhere here.

Edited January 4, 2014 by goose30

[DrSch]

My Two cents worth

Sounds like the Crew did what they were supposed to do - they called your room... you did not answer, so whose fault is that??

They stopped serving the "underage" person adult beverages, so at some point they realized something was wrong - they kicked him out of the bar.. The crew did what they deemed appropriate...

 

The real issue here is parental control ( or lack thereof ) - too many times on ships, "children" (if you can call a almost 17 year old a child) are left to fend for themselves and expect the crew to be a babysitter - that is the parents job, not the bartender in a bar!!! If this 16 year old (almost 17) is pulling this stunt on the ship, how many times had he hit the liquor cabinet at home??

 

Your "Kid" out having a few drinks, sounds to be the least of your problems - you're lucky he wasn't hooking up with some young lady someplace, or maybe that was the plan... Learn to control your kid, so adults on the ship can enjoy their vacation away their own...

 

 

BINGO!! THIS ^^

 

Too many people go on cruises these days, and expect no only the crew to be the baby sitter to their teenagers, but the other passengers as well.

 

Sorry people, you have kids.. just because Princess has a kid's club, it doesn't mean you are on vacation from being a parent.. you get to do that until the kid is out on his own, and sometimes you need to be a parent after that as well.

 

The 16 and older group has free range to roam the ship. The younger kids are watched, but the older kids have the freedom to roam the ship and cause trouble.

 

To expect that Princess and Princess security will do the job of parenting is insane. Without thinking about it, way too many parents just think "OK..Princess and Princess security will watch my child, I can pretend I don't have them and go and have fun."

 

So as a passenger without kids, I have to deal with packs of kids running down the halls at night.. taking the do not disturb signs off doors, hanging out up at MUTS being loud and "Cool". I have seen people's vacations ruined by other people's kids.. on one ship, there were over 700 kids, and they would hang out on top of the ship and make it uncomfortable for some of the older people to simply stroll the deck.

 

I have on more than on occasion on a ship had to be the parent to your kids.. I am far more intimidating that a 16 year old, and I have stopped them dead in their tracks from running down the halls. I have told them to leave the MUTS area when they are talking so loudly that people can't hear the movie. I won't put up with crap from your kids.

 

The point being that YOU and only YOU are responsible for your kid's behavior on the ship (And everywhere else for that matter). You can focus on who on the ship was at fault, but bottom line, you are at fault.. even though you did nothing wrong.

 

OP.. make sure your kid knows that other people spent the money they had saved up for a vacation on that cruise. His being drunk and unruly could have damaged their vacation. Does he have the right to do that to them?

 

People may lose their jobs on the cruise line because he had to get drunk.. How does he feel about the fact that he may have cost someone their job?

 

Princess may lose business because he decided he wanted to get drunk and other people were offended by drunk kids roaming around on their ship... How does he feel about the fact that he may have damaged future sales for Princess.

 

For those of you that say "You can't stop a 16 year old from drinking / trying to drink".. I can tell you that I wouldn't have dared to do that when I was younger, because I feared my father. Stop trying to be "Besties" with your kids and start being parents..

[sweetsleep]

I have seen a mother buy alcoholic drinks poolside for her underage daughter and friend on a Princess ship and overheard the mom telling them to be quiet about their ages-the waiter did not hear this so he is technically not at fault since the alcohol was sold to an adult.
Perhaps the OP should check her son's wallet for a fake ID? I suspect he probably has one.
There are so many ways this underage child could have obtained access even with a diligent parent.
When my daughter sailed with me at age 15 I was very lucky that she sought out "good kids" in the teen center who were not drinking or doing drugs-yes,she confirmed that many were obtaining alcohol under age 18 on the Med cruise. That was in 2006.
We did a spring break cruise in March of this year when she was already 21 but looks much younger and she was carded for alcohol purchases. Our friends bought a bottle of wine in the MDR and both she and her college friend were carded at the table.
She did somehow manage to get a 6 pack of beer onboard without it being confiscated as it was in a styrofoam cooler that we checked with the porters.
So, sometimes booze still makes it on to the ship

[Host CJSKIDS]

[quote name='Pam in CA']We don't know that for sure. And, if a 16YO looks 21, which can be the case, using someone else's card isn't going to raise a red flag. Sometimes, age is very hard to discern.[/QUOTE]

That's true Pam!

[Mom33]

[quote name='MauiLvrs']While it may be against line policy, in international waters ... not likely to be illegal...[/QUOTE]

Would robbery and murder be illegal in international waters or would this simply be a matter of line policy? :rolleyes:

When in international waters, the Captain is the law. No drinking for minors under 21 is law. He has the power to restrain and remove from the ship, anyone violating this law.

:D Pack a jacket :D

[Blk_Amish]

[quote name='own']I was on the December 26-30 sailing and signed my son up for the teen club. I believed that he was safe on that ship in terms of drinking alcohol. I was wrong. I got the call from the teen club (I wasn't in my cabin - they left a message). They said my son was drunk, and they told him to leave. They wanted me to come up to talk to them.

Aside from the issue I have with my son for his own behavior is this:

How in the hell did a minor get served? He told me another teen (who I confirmed did also get kicked out) got a hold of his dad's card and ordered martinis!

Secondly, and this is a big one - [B]why would they just tell a drunk teen to leave?[/B] What if he had gone overboard or who knows what?! When I arrived, no one could tell me where he was - only that he was kicked out.

I am very disappointed in the way this was handled.[/QUOTE]

I took my son on a Carnival cruise for his high school graduation this past Spring. For the first time he did not have a curfew but neither did I. Going off to college, I figured back off but keep a watchful eye. One of the things I noticed was many young unsupervised kids late at night and teens that were clearly under the influence.

Since there was an alcohol related teen death on another sailing I granted him immunity from my wrath to find out the truth about teen drinking on the cruise. Many, many kids smuggled the alcohol on the way mom and dad did. The ones you bought that disappeared but you can't recall drinking, yep they got it. I took back a couple bottle of beer from Cozumel and had them in the cabin. I couldn't recall drinking them but thought my friend took them. No, she didn't, he took them. A girl over the age of 21 bought him alcohol because he looked cute. Let's look in the mirror and asked how many times we tell our teens it's ok to hang out for hours with other kids on the cruise without knowing a thing about them. All the parents readily send the kids to the kid club not knowing who their sometimes easily influenced child will encounter. We tell them to be aware of strangers but have them spend an entire week with older kids who can lead them into temptation they may or maybe not would attempt on their own.

As to what to do, that is a hard call. if they forced him to stay then it could be a case of false imprisonment. Edited January 4, 2014 by Blk_Amish

[hubofhockey]

[quote name='Mom33']Would robbery and murder be illegal in international waters or would this simply be a matter of line policy? :rolleyes:

When in international waters, the Captain is the law. No drinking for minors under 21 is law. He has the power to restrain and remove from the ship, anyone violating this law.

:D Pack a jacket :D[/QUOTE]

No, when in international waters, the Captain is NOT the law. The law is the law under the country of the flag the ship is registered. Captains cannot arbitrarily reduce drinking ages. The have to operate under the law of that country.