9 year old alone on ship

[BabyJacks17]

I agree that at the end of the day to "each his own" but there should be extreme discretion used when allowing your child to sign out of camp Carnival alone.

 

You mentioned that the maturity of the child should be a consideration but I think that should not be the only thing to be concerned about. You also have to be concerned about the actions of others too. A child can be as mature as possible but if there is someone who wants to do them any harm maturity doesn't do any good.

 

Absolutely, I agree.

 

I completely understand where others are coming from in not allowing their kids to check themselves out and also the fears that come with it.

 

The only reason we even considered to allow her the luxury of checking herself out is because of her maturity. However, like you said a lot of other things were taken into consideration. But just because we allow her to check herself out doesn't mean we allow her to roam the ship at her discretion either.

 

The right to check herself out came with a strict set of rules and she understood that if she so much as considered bending those rules in the slightest, her right to check herself out would be completely revoked.

Edited January 15, 2014 by BabyJacks17

[DebJ14]

Our oldest grandson is 9. There is no way we would ever let him sign himself out and have the run of the ship. He is a good kid and we trust him, but he is a kid. Brain is not mature and sometimes something that seems perfectly logical to a kid is off the charts crazy to a mature adult. I also do not trust the other passengers. I guess I have seen one too many taken passengers off in handcuffs for outstanding warrants.

[mpdahmer]

On our last cruise our youngest was 12 and was able to sign in/out of the kids club. Being we had late seating he was able to ask permission to leave when he was done with dinner and head to the Kids club with a friend who was sitting a few tables away. The other 8 kids ranged from 15 to 18 and stayed together most of the trip (multiple families cruising together). Our 12 year old was by far the youngest in the group and not able to go with the older kids to their group. Most nights even though he was able to sign himself out of the club we met him there at closing time. There was one night he was not there when we got there and we were concerned until we found his brother/sisters met and signed him out before we got there.

 

Our bigger concern with letting a youner child roam the ship is God forbid there was a true emergency (Fire, ship listing, iceberg...) and they were seperated from us not knowing where the other was. I have heard stories from ships that had problems that the staff was wonderful when it came to the kids in the groups during such emergencies. If they were not in a group and on their own roaming I would want to know where they were (preferably with us).

 

I also trust my kids in the sense that they would not be the ones throwing things over board. We have been on 3 cruises with my kids with a 4th booked for this summer. On every cruise we had warned our kids since the day we booked until we were on the ship about sticking together, not roaming aimlessly, no blocking the stairs, be respectful of others and do not get in trouble during our trip.

 

These are rules we expect of our children not only on a cruise but wherever we go. While we give our kids many freedoms they know that if they break our trust they will lose them. We are actually more concerned about our 19-20 year old daughters than our 14 year old son. We have warned them about not accepting drinks from anyone and staying in a group. I don't think we will have any problems but we still worry.

 

Our biggest pet peeve is the kids who roam the ship all day without a parent to be found. These are usually the kids who are constanly in the hot tubs even though the signs clearly state no children under a certain age or without a parent. I am sure without a doubt that God forbid something happened to one of these kids their parents would be the first to sue.

[elliair]

Our biggest pet peeve is the kids who roam the ship all day without a parent to be found. These are usually the kids who are constanly in the hot tubs even though the signs clearly state no children under a certain age or without a parent. I am sure without a doubt that God forbid something happened to one of these kids their parents would be the first to sue.

 

It was a month or so ago when they found a child at the bottom of the pool on a ship. The mother left the oldest son in charge of the kid. No one was paying any attention, and I believe one of the bar waiters saw him at the bottom of the pool. There were people (including me), who insisted that the cruise line have a lifeguard on duty. But thinking back, where were the parents? So it's not just pedophiles that can ruin a child's life.

 

http://www.cruisecritic.com/news/news.cfm?ID=5573

Edited January 15, 2014 by elliair
add link to drowning

[winddawn]

This middle aged mother agrees with you. I don't think kids under 12 should be wandering about a big ship alone.

I wish the parents of the kids that run up and down the halls unsupervised agreed with you.

[jlindemer]

My children are 10 and 12. They were 7 and 5 when we took our first cruise. They have been on 3 cruises so far. 2 Disney and 1 Carnival.

 

Since the oldest was allowed to sign himself out we have let him. This was on Disney in 2010 and on Carnival last year. Disney puts a tracker of sorts on the child regardless of whether they can sign in and out on their own or not. It enables them to keep track of all children for a number of reasons. Carnival does not have a tracker.

 

Lucky for me, I have raised responsible children. Children who know to bite, kick, or punch someone and scream out if someone is doing something they shouldn't.

 

Also, lucky for me, most of the activities that they could do on their own are in a limited amount of areas.

 

We have never had a problem-ever-with having them do something they shouldn't, be somewhere they can't be, or find them when we need to. They know to check in with us every 15-30 minutes.

 

And, lucky for me, the minors who are allowed to do this do not drink. They have a better chance of not doing something stupid while they are on board than the adults do that are drinking.

 

I would never allow them to swim on their own. They know this. I do allow them to go and get a soda, ice cream, watch a movie, etc. alone.

 

I also allow them to ride rides at Disney on their own. :eek: I let them go to the bathroom alone. :eek: I have let them go into Disney World and go ride a ride while I went to the bathroom and leisurely strolled to the ride to meet them at the exit. :eek::eek:

 

I am sure there are things with your parenting style that I could criticize. But, I don't. I keep those things to myself.

 

Also, I do not believe that the teachers should raise the students. I have two boys who are classified as gifted and work hard to maintain their GPA. One is in one of the best middle/high schools in the country. They do just fine. And, I will be a teacher by August 2015. I will not try to tell the parents of my students how to raise their children. And, I will keep my eyebrows down when they do something I don't think is correct. Know why, because they are the parents and they love their children with all of the hearts. They make the best decisions for their family and will continue to do so.

[JustCruiseMe]

I guess I grew up in a more trusting time.

 

My siblings and I walked 3 blocks to school along with a lot of the other kids in the neighborhood starting in kindergarten. Sometimes there were 2 or 3 of us together and sometimes I was alone.

 

 

quote]

 

Your mother couldn't walk or drive her young children to school?

Ha, I walked too! In first grade, by myself mostly. Sometimes walking home we'd start out as a group then as everyone split and be alone. No big deal back then but now not such a good idea.

[BabyJacks17]

My children are 10 and 12. They were 7 and 5 when we took our first cruise. They have been on 3 cruises so far. 2 Disney and 1 Carnival.

 

Since the oldest was allowed to sign himself out we have let him. This was on Disney in 2010 and on Carnival last year. Disney puts a tracker of sorts on the child regardless of whether they can sign in and out on their own or not. It enables them to keep track of all children for a number of reasons. Carnival does not have a tracker.

 

Lucky for me, I have raised responsible children. Children who know to bite, kick, or punch someone and scream out if someone is doing something they shouldn't.

 

Also, lucky for me, most of the activities that they could do on their own are in a limited amount of areas.

 

We have never had a problem-ever-with having them do something they shouldn't, be somewhere they can't be, or find them when we need to. They know to check in with us every 15-30 minutes.

 

And, lucky for me, the minors who are allowed to do this do not drink. They have a better chance of not doing something stupid while they are on board than the adults do that are drinking.

 

I would never allow them to swim on their own. They know this. I do allow them to go and get a soda, ice cream, watch a movie, etc. alone.

 

I also allow them to ride rides at Disney on their own. :eek: I let them go to the bathroom alone. :eek: I have let them go into Disney World and go ride a ride while I went to the bathroom and leisurely strolled to the ride to meet them at the exit. :eek::eek:

 

I am sure there are things with your parenting style that I could criticize. But, I don't. I keep those things to myself.

 

Also, I do not believe that the teachers should raise the students. I have two boys who are classified as gifted and work hard to maintain their GPA. One is in one of the best middle/high schools in the country. They do just fine. And, I will be a teacher by August 2015. I will not try to tell the parents of my students how to raise their children. And, I will keep my eyebrows down when they do something I don't think is correct. Know why, because they are the parents and they love their children with all of the hearts. They make the best decisions for their family and will continue to do so.

 

While it may seem like you are in the minority on this issue I just want to let you know you're not alone at all!

 

While majority may frown on the fact that we'd allow a minor these privileges, there are clearly others (myself included) who feel the way you do.

[PhotoPete]

I guess I grew up in a more trusting time.

 

My siblings and I walked 3 blocks to school along with a lot of the other kids in the neighborhood starting in kindergarten. Sometimes there were 2 or 3 of us together and sometimes I was alone.

 

Starting at about age 9 or so, my Mom would send me to the grocery store which was 4 blocks away and I had to cross a busy street.

 

My point is that we knew better than to get in anyone's car or go into someone's backyard or off looking for a puppy.....and I kind of think that a 9yo on a ship would have the same sense of personal safety.

 

I've seen the kids out doing their scavenger hunts and they are usually in groups of 2 or 3. I think it's a good idea to start slowly with sign out liberties. Maybe have them sign themselves out and plan to meet you somewhere pretty close by.

 

Or like a PP said allow them to go into the buffet while you are at the pool, or back to get pizza. And expand their range as they get older.

 

 

I also grew up in a more trusting time. My parents would send me to the store on my bike shopping. I remember going when I was 10, buying cigaretts and Vicks Formula 44 with codine for them. Today, I would never let my grandkids do that, let alone let them wander about a cruise ship....too many perverts out there.

[L&J]

At the end of the day you have to give your kids room to grow, teach them respect, give them room to make mistakes and learn from them and keep them safe at the same time. They have to be given opportunity to earn trust and that there are consequences when they break that trust.

 

You have to teach them that the world is generally a good place but that there are bad people and how to respond when faced with those situations. You can't keep them in a bubble.

 

Kids need parents to be parents, not friends. Nobody else will be that for them. They will have plenty of friends but only 2 parents. It's hard sometimes but that's our job.

 

Those are just my thoughts and I respect if they are not yours.

 

Sent from my Nexus 5

[Almost Packed]

I have been watching a situation for a while and am curious. It seems there is an option for any child older than 9 to sign themselves out of camp if permitted by a parent. Kids not checked into the camp can also have free rein of the ship if allowed by parents. My question is for the parent who allows this. Why?

 

I am not trying to be cute, or start a huge argument, or make anyone nervous. I truly don't get it. I am older (much older), but having been in education for a few years, I am familiar with the innocence of children 9-12. It is a cute age.

 

Do the parents that allow their children this option also allow them to go to the local mall alone? Or with a friend? A cruise ship is like a huge mall to me. Except with unlimited alcohol available for adults. Both have quite a few strangers around. At least at the mall one might assume the child your child is with would be someone you knew. Not always so on a cruise.

 

So the question is, am I just too old fashion or too uneasy or not trusting enough?

 

 

I have a 9 year old. My ds will NOT be able to sign himself in or out until he's older...and age that I decide is mature enough to handle the situation. Perhaps around 12 we can reconsider. This is an age I'd consider dropping my kid off at the mall with a group of friends.

 

We tend to "baby" our kids more here in the U.S. than many other countries.

 

But as a parent of a child who was abducted, I know the fear all to real. I know I cannot always hover over my child, but I'll do my darndest to keep my child(ren) and all kids safe, not just my own.

 

IMO, 9 is too young. I don't know anyone who allows their 9 yr. olds to sign out...far too often however, when parents are on vacation, they think it means a vacation from parenting. And unless the kids are safe and sound at home with family/friends, there is no vacation from parenting.

[kcwingwalker]

Given that there are many opinions about a 9 year old being on their own IMO the answer is simple. If you any doubts about the safety of the child then you know that the answer is "NO".

[2 cruzen]

Nvm...just found the answer

Edited January 16, 2014 by 2 cruzen

[Loving My Life]

Just returned from our children's first cruise. My oldest is 10 (will be 11 in 10 days) and I did NOT let him sign in/out of Camp Carnival. The staff made a big deal about it in front of him by stating numerous times that if he did not have this privilege, he could not participate in scavenger hunts and similar activities, but that didn't sway me.

 

We did let him go to the bathroom when we were at dinner, get his own food at the lido buffet, and stay in the cabin during dinner one night when he wasn't feeling well (with instructions not to open the door), but that's about it.

 

Ironically, at the buffet one day, I let my 6 year old go to the dessert station where a server was making cream puff sundaes about 12 feet away and in my direct line of sight. A woman saw him in the line and VERY LOUDLY asked "where the heck his parents were." When I spoke up that I was right there watching him, she informed me I needed to "keep a better eye on him because anyone could snatch him."

[hftmrock]

I saw a documentary about what children would actually do in certain situations. One that comes to mind is getting in a car with a stranger. EVERY SINGLE PARENT said that there is NO WAY that their child would get into a car with a stranger because they taught their children all about it and practiced it and their children are very responsible and very trustworthy and would do the right thing and never get in a car with strangers....

 

 

75% of them got in the car....

 

Even if you teach them and show them and you are sure they know it.... it might be different in real life.

[Mutumbojimbo]

I have been watching a situation for a while and am curious. It seems there is an option for any child older than 9 to sign themselves out of camp if permitted by a parent. Kids not checked into the camp can also have free rein of the ship if allowed by parents. My question is for the parent who allows this. Why?

 

 

 

So the question is, am I just too old fashion or too uneasy or not trusting enough?

 

We allowed our 10 year old to sign him self out this year, but he never went to any Camp Carnival activities. Camp Carnival sort of encourages you to allow you to let you child sign him or herself out because one of the activities is a scavenger hunt that the child can not participate in unless they can sign out. My biggest fear when my children are not with us is that they will do something stupid, either on their own or do to peer pressure. We tried walkie talkies this year but our 15 year old was pretty bad about checking in. It is definitely stressful cruising with the kids, even more for my wife than me.

[jlindemer]

So, I guess I shouldn't let the 12 year old go on his own excursion in Cozumel? He is going to be so disappointed. He was going to head to a bar and hang out with the locals. I thought it would be great for his History project. Blast. Now we have to find a different way to finish it.

[joeyancho]

I guess I grew up in a more trusting time.

 

My siblings and I walked 3 blocks to school along with a lot of the other kids in the neighborhood starting in kindergarten. Sometimes there were 2 or 3 of us together and sometimes I was alone.

 

 

quote]

 

Your mother couldn't walk or drive her young children to school?

 

Maybe she wasn't a helicopter parent. I walked to school alone from first grade onward. Times were different fifty years ago. I rode the city bus to middle school, age twelve.

[jlindemer]

Oh and btw, students in Central Florida are require to walk up to 2 miles to get to school and back home. Some parents work and the child would have to walk home unsupervised. There is no bus service for you if you live 1.99 miles from the school. Even the bus stop could be 1.99 miles away if the school they attend is farther. That includes kindergarten.

[Prphan2]

I guess I grew up in a more trusting time.

 

My siblings and I walked 3 blocks to school along with a lot of the other kids in the neighborhood starting in kindergarten. Sometimes there were 2 or 3 of us together and sometimes I was alone.

 

 

quote]

 

Your mother couldn't walk or drive her young children to school?

 

Not everyone's Mom is a stay at home Mom, or able to fix their work schedule to one that they would like. I was born in 1960, am an only child and from the time I was 6 walked to and from school alone, unless some other child in the neighborhood could walk with me. I too, was sent to the store with a shopping list and money to get a few things, also crossing a busy street. We viewed things differently back then. There IS NO WAY I would have allowed our kids to be alone as much as I was allowed. Not at all!

[cherbear4000]

My niece was technically allowed to check herself out of camp at 9. My sister only allowed this so that other family members, like myself, could pick her up from camp without having to be on the list. We cruise in a large family group. My niece knew that she was only allowed to leave the camp if she was with an adult family member. I never understood the parents that allow young children to roam the ship without an adult.

[gertiesmom]

I am 34 and my mom still won't let me wander around alone on a cruise ship!

[Nebr.cruiser]

I saw a documentary about what children would actually do in certain situations. One that comes to mind is getting in a car with a stranger. EVERY SINGLE PARENT said that there is NO WAY that their child would get into a car with a stranger because they taught their children all about it and practiced it and their children are very responsible and very trustworthy and would do the right thing and never get in a car with strangers....

 

 

75% of them got in the car....

 

Even if you teach them and show them and you are sure they know it.... it might be different in real life.

 

I think I saw the same documentary. All the kids had supposedly been well-instructed in stranger danger and what to do in certain circumstances.

 

It was very eye-opening and extremely frightening that by far the majority of the kids (whose parents all insisted they knew what to do) did exactly what they shouldn't do; like, get in the car, open the door to a stranger, take the candy, etc. And some of the kids were in their teens.

 

Kids are not as 'mature' as we believe and even teens do not think like adults.

 

But, it is sad to me to see how regimented life is for kids today. We used to walk and bike all over our small town; it was the norm (this was the 50's). Any mother who walked or drove their kids to school would have been considered very strange, unless they literally lived miles away.

 

I always notice, driving around the suburbs, just how few kids are ever outside, playing, in spite of all the toys and play sets and huge yards. We have become paranoid about many things.

 

That said, when we take grandchildren on a cruise, they are not allowed to walk around by themselves. We'll be taking them again next year, and this time 5 of them will be young teens. Now that, to me, is scary, as I do think they deserve more freedom at that age, but in many ways they are more vulnerable as well.

[notentirelynormal]

Okay, I admit, I didn't read all the comments. Here's mine:

 

I am very protective. It always amazed me when my kids were growing up sitting there in the pizza place and there is a table of 10 YOs (at least that's what they looked) alone in the place for over an hour. Made me crazy. Where were the parents!

 

On a cruise my kids were given some freedom. They were good kids and had their own cabins. I trusted them. Not so much everyone else. My rules were simple. If you said you were going to be somewhere you better be there or all he*ll would break loose.

 

Would I let a 9 YO wander alone? NO! They simply don't have the world experience or knowledge to know how to handle situations. My grandson is out and about a lot. He does theater, karate, goes to Disneyland about 3 time a month and spends tons of time with the LA Fire Department. He's active. He meets tons of different people. He likes them all - and THAT is why I can't allow him to wander on a ship. He thinks people are great and trusts them.

 

What is the expression? Trust, but verify! It's not that I don't trust my kids - it's that I don't trust the people they come in contact with.

[vacationmommy]

We allow our son who is about to be 9 to sign out , the age is 8 on disney ships to be able to sign out of clubs.we have rules my son knows to go from club to cabin. We also allow him to go up deck for ice cream pizza or drinks alone. Everyone raises their children differently and my children know what do if someone attempts to have them go any where with them they are to yell for help and run just like at home if a stranger tries to lure them.