Guests being addressed by their first name?

[RachelG]

Come to think of it, I have often been addressed as Dr. Rachel by crew on both silversea and Regent. Which I think is very appropriate.

Growing up in the south, I was taught to address adults who I knew well as Mr.xxx( whatever his first name was ) or Miss xxxx. Oddly not Mrs. Xxxx. My piano teacher was Miss Dixie. My Sunday school teacher was Miss Eunice. Even though both were married women. My school bus driver was Mr. Mason.

[drron29]

Don't you find that some of the posters on these boards map you laugh so much that you could do serious damage.:p

 

Definitely need a like button for some posts.

Fortunately if my first name is used on board which happens frequently I am addressed as Dr.Ron.This suits me as I now don't forget my name on several fora.

One cheeky chap does address me as Sir Ron.But then he gets worse.

[Ravenscroft]

OK, I'll bite, what is a bunfight? Where do you see hostility? I am sure none is intended. As I stated, yes, it has been heard, but I believe it is by invitation only.

 

"Bunfight" is a British-ism, often attributed to PG Wodehouse. It refers to a bit of an altercation.:)

 

I saw hostility when I read my thread being labelled as 'appalling'. I only asked if other posters had experienced what I'd read about.

 

As Silver Spectre pointed out - I wish I hadn't bothered asking now although I am grateful to those who've answered my question.

[Ravenscroft]

Once again, thank you to those posters who answered my question. :)

 

And Emtbsam, I agree, I'm impressed that the crew remembers names, especially on shorter cruises.

And I can't wait to read that Wes is calling you Mrs V on your upcoming ! ;)

[GUT2407]

I've been on cruises with a range of lines from less expensive to more expensive, now I really don't like being called Sir or Mr or any other honorific that I may be entitled to and I always ask the staff to call me Geoff I invariably then get Mr Geoff [or usually Mr Geoffrey and I have to tell you I hate being called Geoffrey]. I suspect that they are trained that way, I've never heard anyone use a first name on Silversea without some type of honorific.

 

What really amazes me is that from almost the minute I board the Steward and Waitstaff know our names [and that was even way before the tays of electronic devices to assist them.

[UKCruiseJeff]

"I saw hostility when I read my thread being labelled as 'appalling'. I only asked if other posters had experienced what I'd read about.

 

As Silver Spectre pointed out - I wish I hadn't bothered asking now although I am grateful to those who've answered my question.

 

I don't really wish to make this thread about the rights and wrongs of this situation, I'd just like some feedback from recent SS cruisers as to the veracity of this claim.

I was reading some of the reviews yesterday, and I can't remember which ship it was, either Whisper or Spirit, fairly recently.

The reviewer noted that he/she found it inappropriate that the crew addressed the guests by their first names. :eek:

I find this very surprising on a Silversea ship.

Is it true?

 

Sometimes. It is not standard practice. Please let the appropriate person know of your discomfort with that. I understand your reaction.

 

 

You are over-reacting to the response that was quite reasonably generated by your own comment and the post that immediately followed.

 

You started a thread in this forum on a topic that you presumably felt of sufficient importance and cited a fellow passenger as stating "The reviewer noted that he/she found it inappropriate that the crew addressed the guests by their first names. " >.

 

The response was too that specific comment and the post that immediately followed your own. You have a perfect right to post or regret posting but don't blame others.

 

:)

[CanadianKate]

Not entirely related but my daughter goes by her middle name and is currently in the middle of a complex medical situation. All her medical documentation shows her first name.

 

When medical staff refer to her by her first name, it reminds her that they aren't her friends and they really don't know her. Therefore they can't be expected to know how she is going to react to the prodding and poking and they aren't there to hold up her emotions but to deal with her physical issues.

 

I think the honorifics do remind us of the relationship we have with people.

 

Not sure how I feel about the situation on Silversea (do I really care?) but suspect I'm happiest with Mrs. Kate since formality is not part of my life. I respect that it is part of their duties and I hate to ask them to change for me, especially if it can get them in trouble. I do think it is a European vs North American issue and I may fall on the European side of things. As long as I'm living in a fantasy world aboard (and believe me it is far from my regular life) then it may as well contain good old-fashioned formality from those serving me. In for a penny, in for a pound.

[fudge]

It may be appropriate for me to a funny here, no lies!

 

We often see people on board with letters after their name and good for them they have earned their title no doubt.

 

For a laugh I decided to let SS know my wife also has letters after her name

(L A.G.T) anyone guessed yet????

 

Now its on all her stationary, lagt? Likes a gin and tonic :D

[dhill]

That's fine but not by the waitstaff or general crew.

 

Not even the officers do this unless you are a regular and have known them for quit a while.

 

 

Sent from my iPad using Forums

Are you kidding me:eek: What diffrence does it make?Not by the wait staff or crew how dare they.Why they should bow before me and kiss the ground I walk on.COme on were all people and all the same.I suppose its going to ruin your cruise and you will need a full refund.

[Mr Luxury]

Are you kidding me:eek: What diffrence does it make?Not by the wait staff or crew how dare they.Why they should bow before me and kiss the ground I walk on.COme on were all people and all the same.I suppose its going to ruin your cruise and you will need a full refund.

 

 

No,I'm not bothered one way or the other but the way the crew are trained to deal with guests is not to call guests by their first name,this method is common place throughout the service industry.

 

It makes a difference only to each individual guest as to how they are addressed and as we have seen by answers on this thread.

 

I don't think that the point is that the crew bow down and kiss the ground as you put it but rather how comfortable they feel with calling you by your first name and if as I suspect how much grief they would get from their bosses.

 

I like to talk to all crew members when I get the chance and find out about them and have some friendly interaction,this I find makes them relax and open up a little after dealing with some guests who can be a bit too stuffy.

 

 

Sent from my iPad using Forums

Edited December 7, 2014 by Mr Luxury

[auldlassie]

I am with you on this one UKCruiseJeff. Sometimes these boards take my breath away. But thankfully not my ability to type.

[WesW]

Now, I want to be called Mr. L.A.G.T, thanks for that smile fudge.

[UKCruiseJeff]

Now, I want to be called Mr. L.A.G.T, thanks for that smile fudge.

 

We use to rent an apartment in the centre of Vienna. They are very formal about titles in Austria. The owner of the block took a call for me once, and became convinced that I was "Herr Professor", From then on - for ten years or so - nothing would convince her I wasn't "Herr Professor". So every time we stayed, a sign would be put on our doorbell "Herr Professor UKcruiseJeff". Every Christmas card the same. In the end I gave up asking her to call me Jeff. She decide that "Herr Professor Jeff" was as far as she was prepared to go. We still get Christmas cards and it makes me smile. The only upside, was the other residents treated me with enormous respect.

 

:D

[frantic36]

We use to rent an apartment in the centre of Vienna. They are very formal about titles in Austria. The owner of the block took a call for me once, and became convinced that I was "Herr Professor", From then on - for ten years or so - nothing would convince her I wasn't "Herr Professor". So every time we stayed, a sign would be put on our doorbell "Herr Professor UKcruiseJeff". Every Christmas card the same. In the end I gave up asking her to call me Jeff. She decide that "Herr Professor Jeff" was as far as she was prepared to go. We still get Christmas cards and it makes me smile. The only upside, was the other residents treated me with enormous respect.

 

:D

 

Your post I think identifies how we should respect different cultures and how people like to be addressed and therefore not denigrate those who prefer a more traditional style.

 

When I was nursing and even now, I address people by their surnames especially if they are older. If they then ask me to use their Christian name I will do so. But I don't presume to do this before I am asked. I have also taught my sons this.........this of course does not apply to their peers or those younger than them. I would think that this would be the same for the crew? To wait for someone to ask them to use their first name and not address them initially this way?

[UKCruiseJeff]

Your post I think identifies how we should respect different cultures and how people like to be addressed and therefore not denigrate those who prefer a more traditional style.

 

When I was nursing and even now, I address people by their surnames especially if they are older. If they then ask me to use their Christian name I will do so. But I don't presume to do this before I am asked. I have also taught my sons this.........this of course does not apply to their peers or those younger than them. I would think that this would be the same for the crew? To wait for someone to ask them to use their first name and not address them initially this way?

 

I agree.

 

The issue in this thread however, is if someone of a different culture, in a genuine attempt to be friendly calls you by your first name do you object and complain, or shrug and appreciate it is someone with decent motives doing their best.

 

It is that issue that has been polarised.

 

:)