Do you find stressful situations more stressful when solo?

[Joanne G.]

After multiple covid cancellations and postponements, I am on my first solo cruise. (I’ve been on 20+ cruises with my sister or friends.) My trip was supposed to be a 3 week B2B extravaganza, 12 days in the Baltic and 9 days around Great Britain.  But I am on the Carnival Pride, which developed a mechanical issue 3 days before the end of the first cruise. We missed the last port stop.   We spent about a day stopped in the water while the captain determined the best course of action.  Eventually we returned to the last port we visited, Kiel, Germany, for repairs to be made. 
 

Carnival soon sent out a message to everyone booked on the subsequent cruise that it was cancelled as scheduled, but they were hoping to come up with an altered itinerary.  Ok, I get that they couldn’t be specific, not knowing how long the repairs would take.  But the stress came from conflicting information for us B2B passengers.   Long story short, initially I was given, and took, an option in writing to stay onboard until the return to Dover, whenever that might be.  Later, I was told everyone had to disembark in Kiel and charter flights were being arranged to get everyone back to London.  Then I was again told I could stay on board, no problem.  In the meantime, we were told we would be in the Kiel shipyard for several days, so options for a new itinerary for the next cruise were diminishing.
 

Then I was given a letter late last night telling me to set my bags out tonight and be ready for a 6:00 am disembarkation tomorrow and a bus to the Hamburg airport for a flight back to London and a hotel stay until my return flight.  What triggered that??  My return flight is on July 31st!  But then I thought maybe I should take the opportunity to get off and take the offered refund and FCC instead of staying on for who-knows-what type of cruise.   Of course that would mean changing my post-cruise flight and hotel arrangements.
 

I immediately went to guest services for clarification.  They said I should get an email soon about the next cruise which had been officially shortened to 6 days with a new itinerary and some compensation. If after reading that email, if I still wanted to stay on board, just stop by in the morning and let them know I didn’t need the charter flight.  One more visit to guest services this morning, and I think it’s settled.  I’m staying onboard for the shortened itinerary.  
 

Ok, sorry, that wasn’t such a short story.  My point on this board isn’t about all the uncertainties and frustrations (I put that on the Carnival board LOL ), but the fact that the last few days seemed harder to cope with for being solo, with no one to bounce ideas off of or to simply share the frustration with.  I feel more alone than I did when things were going smoothly.  I am in contact with friends and family, but no one is here to share the experience.  
 

Does anyone else feel this way?  Maybe I just need more experience as a solo traveler.  I recently had solo vacations in Ireland, London, and Paris, and thankfully nothing went wrong on them.  I have a couple more solo cruises booked, and I have other solo trips in mind. As things can always go sideways when traveling, I better toughen up!

 

[calliopecruiser]

I live alone, so travelling alone isn't much more of a stretch - I find it less stressful when such things happen, because I'm the only one whose needs and desires have to be considered when I'm trying to find a solution.  When I'm with other people, I find it more stressful because different people's needs and wants limit the available options that will satisfy anyone.  As for commiserating about the uncertainties and frustrations, I'm happy to chat/vent/complain to other passengers caught in the same situation, and we share ideas and information about resolutions. 

 

Fortunately, I haven't been on board when the ship's been waylaid by mechanical problems, but I have been onboard when we have skipped ports (health restrictions, or weather), and once when we were unable to dock at our final port and had to disembark at a port a few hours away. 

[new_cruiser]

I expect it is very individual.  Similar to Calliope, I tend to be more stressed by difficult situations when traveling with my husband than when solo. I want him to enjoy trips so he will continue to want to go on some trips with me as I enjoy traveling together even though I also enjoy doing some trips solo so I can do just what I want. And larger groups with varying needs make it even harder. 

 

I broke my wrist toward the end of a solo trip in Thailand - a compound fracture that required immediate surgery and several days in the hospital and handled that fine. I even watched videos to figure out how to tie my shoes one handed for the trip home. 

 

I also tend to be more stressed if a problem is of my own making - like if I missed a flight through negligence. I can be much more laid back about handling things that were out of my control. 

 

I'm also happy to discuss the situation with other passengers for moral support and to share information and ideas. 

[Meander Ingwa]

I experience just  the opposite.  When something arises, I do not have to concern myself on the thoughts and experience of the others.  I simply yield to my own situation and manage my own expectations.  When something goes sideways, I deal and solve; adapt or change, feeling no need to consult others unless there is a technical issue like booking a flight, then I contact my airline.

 

I have traveled solo so long that I feel secure in the situation and know that journeys are filled with many forks  and sometimes roadblocks

[new_cruiser]

On 7/21/2023 at 1:50 AM, Joanne G. said:

My point on this board isn’t about all the uncertainties and frustrations (I put that on the Carnival board LOL ), but the fact that the last few days seemed harder to cope with for being solo, with no one to bounce ideas off of or to simply share the frustration with.  I feel more alone than I did when things were going smoothly. ...

 I better toughen up!

Thinking about your post again, your travel disruption is more disappointing and of way longer duration of uncertainty than I have ever had to cope with. A more typical cruise disruption would be missing a port or two or a change of ports to deal with weather.

 

To have nearly two weeks of a trip disrupted and not know for days whether part of the trip will be on or you are heading home, would be very disappointing and frustrating under any circumstances. I don't think you should feel that you are lacking for finding this hard. 

[wdw1972]

Like many others, stressful situations are much easier to deal with when I'm solo.  I don't need whatever the stressful situation is PLUS dealing with hubby's reaction/issues at the same time.  Perhaps this is why I mostly cruise without him 😉

 

Sue/WDW1972

[carol louise]

Thank you, new_cruiser, for your comment. I am Joanne’s G.’s sister, and have vicariously experienced this cruise disruption of hers via our text messaging. Indeed, it was the prolonged uncertainty and—particularly frustrating—the conflicting information provided over several days’ time that made her situation especially stressful.

[Joanne G.]

Thank you to all who shared your thoughts. With the perspective of a little time, and now with the status of the next cruise settled, I can appreciate that the decision to stay onboard or to bail on the next cruise was mine alone without consultation with anyone, and that’s not necessarily a bad thing.  
 

As my sister carol louise said in her post above, it was first hearing that I could choose to stay on board; then no, everyone has to get off in Germany while repairs are being made; then oh, of course you can stay onboard; then “here is your charter flight information from Hamburg to London”; oh, sorry, ignore that; then, “your charter flight has changed to this new time”; and lastly, ignore that 2nd message about the flight that you don’t need to be on.  That was the source of my stress during which I felt particularly alone.   The people I had become friendly with onboard were not B2B passengers - most passengers of course were not - so they were in a different situation and readily accepted the charter flight to London so they could go home on schedule.   
 

But all’s well that ends well. We departed Germany early Saturday afternoon and arrived back in Dover this morning. Our 9 night cruise has become a 6 night one, with fair compensation for the change.  I’ll still see 3 of our original ports, and I’ve spent the last few days in the unique situation of being on a ship with only about 400 passengers.  We were told about 100 will be disembarking today and about 1000 will be boarding.  Clearly many on this next cruise cancelled. The ship should not feel crowded at all. 
 

This has been an unforgettable experience. I have other solo cruises planned, including one in September on this very ship.  I’ll hope for an uneventful cruise, and I wish the same for ever else in their upcoming cruises. 

[Honolulu Blue]

On 7/21/2023 at 4:50 AM, Joanne G. said:

After multiple covid cancellations and postponements, I am on my first solo cruise. (I’ve been on 20+ cruises with my sister or friends.) My trip was supposed to be a 3 week B2B extravaganza, 12 days in the Baltic and 9 days around Great Britain.  But I am on the Carnival Pride, which developed a mechanical issue 3 days before the end of the first cruise. We missed the last port stop.   We spent about a day stopped in the water while the captain determined the best course of action.  Eventually we returned to the last port we visited, Kiel, Germany, for repairs to be made. 
 

Carnival soon sent out a message to everyone booked on the subsequent cruise that it was cancelled as scheduled, but they were hoping to come up with an altered itinerary.  Ok, I get that they couldn’t be specific, not knowing how long the repairs would take.  But the stress came from conflicting information for us B2B passengers.   Long story short, initially I was given, and took, an option in writing to stay onboard until the return to Dover, whenever that might be.  Later, I was told everyone had to disembark in Kiel and charter flights were being arranged to get everyone back to London.  Then I was again told I could stay on board, no problem.  In the meantime, we were told we would be in the Kiel shipyard for several days, so options for a new itinerary for the next cruise were diminishing.
 

Then I was given a letter late last night telling me to set my bags out tonight and be ready for a 6:00 am disembarkation tomorrow and a bus to the Hamburg airport for a flight back to London and a hotel stay until my return flight.  What triggered that??  My return flight is on July 31st!  But then I thought maybe I should take the opportunity to get off and take the offered refund and FCC instead of staying on for who-knows-what type of cruise.   Of course that would mean changing my post-cruise flight and hotel arrangements.
 

I immediately went to guest services for clarification.  They said I should get an email soon about the next cruise which had been officially shortened to 6 days with a new itinerary and some compensation. If after reading that email, if I still wanted to stay on board, just stop by in the morning and let them know I didn’t need the charter flight.  One more visit to guest services this morning, and I think it’s settled.  I’m staying onboard for the shortened itinerary.  
 

Ok, sorry, that wasn’t such a short story.  My point on this board isn’t about all the uncertainties and frustrations (I put that on the Carnival board LOL ), but the fact that the last few days seemed harder to cope with for being solo, with no one to bounce ideas off of or to simply share the frustration with.  I feel more alone than I did when things were going smoothly.  I am in contact with friends and family, but no one is here to share the experience.  
 

Does anyone else feel this way?  Maybe I just need more experience as a solo traveler.  I recently had solo vacations in Ireland, London, and Paris, and thankfully nothing went wrong on them.  I have a couple more solo cruises booked, and I have other solo trips in mind. As things can always go sideways when traveling, I better toughen up!

Like many of my colleagues in this thread, I've traveled solo a lot and mostly don't mind making decisions on the fly.  I think it gets easier as you go along.  It certainly did for me.

 

I wish you safe and less stressful travels. 

[PerfectlyPerth]

On 7/22/2023 at 3:15 AM, calliopecruiser said:

I live alone, so travelling alone isn't much more of a stretch - I find it less stressful when such things happen, because I'm the only one whose needs and desires have to be considered when I'm trying to find a solution.  When I'm with other people, I find it more stressful because different people's needs and wants limit the available options that will satisfy anyone. 

Setting aside the actual issues of all the changes with Joanne's trip and only answering the subject title question "Do you find stressful situations more stressful when solo?"

I would say pretty much what Calliope said. 
I have lived alone for decades by choice so I'm accustomed to dealing with all manner of issues solo. I can manage my own stress or anxiety levels as I see fit. I can take a time out to suit my own needs.
 

While my many world travels over the decades have generally gone smoothly, when an occasional bump happens like flight delays I tend to just walk away from the maddening screeching crowds. I sit and collect myself. Write myself some notes. Wait for crowds to subside before heading to a counter to get more info. 

The rare times I have decided to travel with a friend I have been driven mad by their needs to have their anxieties & concerns managed for them. Suffice to say it's nearly ended friendships lol !!

[Roz]

@Joanne G., different viewpoint here.  I find it VERY stressful to be traveling by myself when things go awry.  

 

Earlier this year I almost missed my South American cruise when I missed a connecting flight toBuenos Aires.  I had to stay overnight in Houston and then take a flight the next evening to Santiago and then connect to BA.  I was alone and afraid,  and don't speak Spanish.  What if I finally made it to BA and couldn't board?  How would I get back home?  Navigating the Santiago airport was difficult due to the language barrier and not understanding their procedures.  It took me 3 days to get to BA.  I arrived exhausted, sweaty, and stinky.  Made it onto the ship,  barely. 

 

The situation the OP described would definitely stress me out and be made worse by being by myself. 

[Joanne G.]

2 hours ago, Roz said:

@Joanne G., different viewpoint here.  I find it VERY stressful to be traveling by myself when things go awry.  

 

Earlier this year I almost missed my South American cruise when I missed a connecting flight toBuenos Aires.  I had to stay overnight in Houston and then take a flight the next evening to Santiago and then connect to BA.  I was alone and afraid,  and don't speak Spanish.  What if I finally made it to BA and couldn't board?  How would I get back home?  Navigating the Santiago airport was difficult due to the language barrier and not understanding their procedures.  It took me 3 days to get to BA.  I arrived exhausted, sweaty, and stinky.  Made it onto the ship,  barely. 

 

The situation the OP described would definitely stress me out and be made worse by being by myself. 

Wow, that is quite a story.  The language barrier was worrisome to me, too, when I thought I was going to be put off the ship in Germany.    But I’m not going to quit traveling overseas solo. I am glad you made it onto your ship, and I hope it was a great cruise.   Thanks for sharing. 

[tw0sugar5]

No.  I’m an introvert who is flexible with my plans.  Traveling with a non-flexible extrovert stresses me out. Then I have to deal with both: getting the problem fixed and the person freaking out next to me.

 

 I’ve solo cruised once and it was my first cruise.  Wandered around Nassau by myself.  Ah those young and naive days…

 

I’ve been in Paris and Kyoto by myself for a day or two before meeting up with a companion.  Forgot to exit the RER at the correct stop while on my way to CDG by myself and missed my boarding time.    Dealt with it.  Walked Seoul at night by myself…I’m a little reckless.

Edited July 30, 2023 by tw0sugar5

[kochleffel]

I find unexpected situations less stressful when I travel alone. Often a travel partner is less adaptable or more anxious than I am.