Formal night help - can't wear dresses

[Mirrikh]

Hi, I'll be travelling on the IoS (my first cruise) in just under a month and I'm starting to stress about the formal nights. I can't wear dresses or skirts due to severe social anxiety and whereas usually I'd just eat elsewhere I'm sailing with family and they insist on me attending formal dinners in the MDR. So, is it usual to see women in the dining room not wearing dresses on formal nights? I was hoping to get away with black/cream dress pants or linen pants and nice-ish tops.

 

Also if any of the more fashion-minded here could help with some tips on what to wear that would help loads, as I never usually wear anything other than jeans and a t-shirt, usually only going as far as nice jeans and a nice t-shirt if I really have to. So this issue is pushing me really far out of my comfort zone and its ruining the cruise for me already.

 

Thanks.

[marci22]

LOTS of women wear dressy pants: cream or black dressy pants would be perfect. Just pair them with a dressy top and you will fit in fine.

[linkerbink]

I've NEVER worn a dress on formal night. As the previous poster described, I just wear dressy slacks and top and I fit right in.

[linedancer]

I have been on over 20 cruises and 75% of the time on formal night I wear dressy pants and blouse. Check out the stores or go online. You can find some wonderful, comfortable outfits. Macy's, Penney's etc.

 

Relax don't stress. It is called a vacation. Have fun

 

Irene

[cb at sea]

There will be LOADS of women in evening pants/tops....no need to stress! Only your own group will pay ANY attention to what you're wearing....you'll be totally surprised at how "introspective" folks are when they're on vacation.

Go to the dining room, and relax...this isn't supposed to give you anxiety...it's supposed to be relaxing! Enjoy the room's ambiance, and being waited on, and your family and friends!

[H2Otstr]

Just returned from a Med cruise and I wore white linen pants with a fancy black and white blouse. Topped it off with a cream colored pashmina and I felt fine. We were sitting most of the time and no one knew what we were wearing anyhow :D.

[PrincesScuba]

Hi, I'll be travelling on the IoS (my first cruise) in just under a month and I'm starting to stress about the formal nights. I can't wear dresses or skirts due to severe social anxiety and whereas usually I'd just eat elsewhere I'm sailing with family and they insist on me attending formal dinners in the MDR. So, is it usual to see women in the dining room not wearing dresses on formal nights? I was hoping to get away with black/cream dress pants or linen pants and nice-ish tops.

 

Also if any of the more fashion-minded here could help with some tips on what to wear that would help loads, as I never usually wear anything other than jeans and a t-shirt, usually only going as far as nice jeans and a nice t-shirt if I really have to. So this issue is pushing me really far out of my comfort zone and its ruining the cruise for me already.

 

Thanks.

 

There is an entire section on Cruise Critic devoted to "cruise fashion": http://www.boards.cruisecritic.com/forumdisplay.php?f=182

[picture]

do not worry many women wear dressy pants with nice top on formal nights.

[katiel53]

I'm sure you will be fine with your pants and a dressy blouse. On other than formal nights you can wear more casual pants and a blouse. Jeans are accepted and you will get lots of comments about wearing them, but to me, if they are nice jeans, not the ones one would clean a barn in, and a nice blouse or top that's fine.

 

Tee-shirts are fine for breakfast and lunch, but not so fine for dinner. I think it depends on what kind of tee-shirt. If it's one that advertises something, that's not so great, but if it is a ladies tee shirt that is plain, (as opposed to a man's tee that a woman is wearing) it could be fine. I don't know what kind of tee's or jeans you wear, but I'm sure you will figure things out and have a great time.

[southerngoose]

I think nice pants would be fine. But you might also consider culottes (wide legged pants that has a "skirt" appearance, but your legs are all covered) or a skort (skirt panel in the front, shorts on the back). It sort of depends on what causes the anxiety whether these would be acceptable solutions. I wear both culottes and skorts if I fear the skirt flipping up and having every see my undies.

[margeecruiser]

Hello -- Please go to the Cruise Fashion board as others have suggested. There are lots of information available and the posters are positive and kind (no put-downs). There are many wide-legged pants outfits where the pants look like a long skirt and give great body coverage and are really very formal-looking (IMHO). The people on the Cruise Fashion board are very good with shopping ideas, web sites and pictures to give you an idea of what is available.

 

Good luck and have a wonderful cruise.

 

Margee

[Jo2310]

Just returned from a Med cruise and I wore white linen pants with a fancy black and white blouse. Topped it off with a cream colored pashmina and I felt fine. We were sitting most of the time and no one knew what we were wearing anyhow :D.

That's what I was going to recommend. Nothing dresses up beautifully tailored pants and a beautiful blouse like a pashmina does - it's so elegant looking - and add some beautiful costume jewelry and you'll look great!

[Maryscooking]

Here are two pants options (from JCPenney online clearance, pretty inexpensive too) for you that might work, and paired with a dressy blouse would fit in with what everyone else is wearing very well:

 

EDIT: Guess I can't use tiny-url on this site. But go to jcp.com and do a search for "fly away pants" and both pants should come up.

 

You will see a wide range of fashions and ideas of formal wear on the ship, so don't stress about this!

[rjm1cc]

My wife never wears a dress on formal night. Just a little fancy top and nice slacks. Flats for shoes. The key is to pack light and not worry about what stranges might think. For 99% of them they will not notice. I would eat with the family.

[gerif]

I have two pair of lightweight crepe palazzo pants - one black, one ivory - and wear them with beaded tops for formal night. Very comfortable (elastic waists) and I can wear low-heeled sandals as well.

[beej]

I am fluffy and a senior and i look horrible in dresses. You guessed it, i only wear pants and a dressy top with a little bling on it. A scarf or pashmina type stole and you are ready to go. I've never felt out of place. They have solid pashmina stoles on the ship usually for $10. i got a couple of lacy and silky jobs on sale for about the same price. Just have a good time. You'll be fine

[reallyitsmema]

A nice pair of dress pants and a blouse will be fine. I wouldn't get culottes or anything like that since you are so young. Buy something you will wear again out to a nice dinner once you get home.:)

[dixieva]

I have a sister who refuses to wear a dress or even dressy pants and sparkly top. She goes to formal night dinner with us (most of us are in black pants,dressy top and sandals) and she just wears her regular pants-not jeans-more like dockers and usually she will wear a white button down blouse and her regular shoes-not dressy at all. She's comfortable, we don't care what she wears and she has never been turned away.

[BroncosFan2010]

Long pants and a dressy top will be just fine. You will probably be more comfortable than many others in dresses! Enjoy your cruise!

[bluegirlum]

My cousin doesn't wear anything other than shorts or cargo pants and t-shirts. When she "dresses up," it's plain khakis and brown shoes. Sometimes a sweater. She's worn this to family weddings, funerals, whatever. We don't care. We love her and that's all that matters. Remember that CC comprises about 1% of cruisers, and if your family doesn't care, then why should any of us?

 

Have a great time!

[Desert Cruizers]

I generally split the Formal nights, between a dress one evening and dressy black slacks and fancy top the next one or two depending on number of formal nights.

 

Gay

[jorapp]

Formal night? Don't stress about it at all! This is not your grandmother's "formal", it is more like dressy casual. You will see everything from cocktail to "cruise dressy", formal gowns and cute young ladies with eye popping clevage. Wear something fun, tropical and comfortable, and you will fit right in.

[Nanaimobound]

My daughter never wears formal wear for the exact same reason.

Wear what you will be comfortable in. Period. No one will even notice I promise you! let the dressers dress and enjoy, and let the casual people do the same! Like I have said to my daughter, once you take your seat, who even knows what you are wearing anyway?

We are sailing in 6 days on Mariner and this is going to be the most casual cruise ever for us. I wear dresses but i got a couple of kind of Mexican style skirts and some pretty blouses, and I got my husband two Mexican style dinner shirts. One black one white, and no ties this time! Can't wait... We are going for relaxation all the way on this one, and i feel just great about it!

[Gablin]

My mother did not wear dresses or skirts for about the last twenty five years of her life. She had lovely pants outfits and separates, and wore them to weddings, her own anniversaries and birthdays, Christmas, etc. As she aged, she did not like the way her legs looked and did not want anyone else to see them.

 

If you can acquire one pair of black pants in a dressy fabric (silk or poly - try for washable for practical reasons) and a few sparkly or shiny tops, you will feel quite dressed up and will fit in nicely. I would not spend a lot of money on these - try thrift shops or consignment shops - you might not wear them in your usual day-to-day life. Flat sandals will be fine. Who looks at feet anyway?

I hope you enjoy your cruise with your family!

[Jolimont]

Thank you OP for starting this thread, the tips are great and it's good to see I'm not the only one who doesn't like to decorate myself like a Christmas tree :-)