How did my minor child get drunk on Ruby?

[own]

I was on the December 26-30 sailing and signed my son up for the teen club. I believed that he was safe on that ship in terms of drinking alcohol. I was wrong. I got the call from the teen club (I wasn't in my cabin - they left a message). They said my son was drunk, and they told him to leave. They wanted me to come up to talk to them.

 

Aside from the issue I have with my son for his own behavior is this:

 

How in the hell did a minor get served? He told me another teen (who I confirmed did also get kicked out) got a hold of his dad's card and ordered martinis!

 

Secondly, and this is a big one - why would they just tell a drunk teen to leave? What if he had gone overboard or who knows what?! When I arrived, no one could tell me where he was - only that he was kicked out.

 

I am very disappointed in the way this was handled.

[Colo Cruiser]

How old is your son?

[own]

16 (17 in six weeks).

[mrobstad]

I had a similar experience on RCCL. I signed papers saying he cannot drink (he was 18) after fighting with him for two hours, and then, I also received a bill for a bucket of beers even though I did not give him charging privileges. The customer service line was long, I waited, and was told to return to speak to a manager at 6 am!

[CI66774]

Maybe the other teen looked older and that's why he was served. Obviously, your son (and his "friend") are the main culprits here and caused their own grief but I would have preferred the teen club to have them wait there until you arrived and escorted them out.

[Loonbeam]

Unfortunately, the only way a bartender has to check ID on a cruise ship is the charging ID. If the other teen looked of reasonable age and had a valid ID I can see where the bartender would serve them, especially if they were in a busy location, or one of the lounges where the lighting may not be so good. It sadly happens all the time in bars despite even the best intentioned staff,

 

I know its under consideration in the future to have the photos taken at boarding show up on POS terminals, but that won't help wandering servers, etc and there are privacy issues.

 

As to why they kicked him out, I would suspect there were issues with other teens. That said, the proper approach should have been to have security escort them to a cabin or the brig and wait for parental contact. This is one area where they definitely fell down and I don't think followed protocol. I'm guessing the teen staff wanted them out of their hair but that should not have happened.

[Cruisin' Chick]

I would hope that when a server swipes a card, his or her name is lined to that sale. So if you went to the front desk and told them that someone bought a drink for your child, that could have been traced. Maybe the boy who bought it looked at least 21 (or they had an obvious adult buy it for them). I don't know what safeguards they have onboard, but if someone who looks under a certain age does buy a drink, and the server gets caught, I would imagine that server risks getting fired.

 

I was serving beers at yesterday's Rose Bowl game (not for pay, but to raise money for a cause), and I had to go through alcohol training. We were told to card anyone who looked under 35, but we were even carding people who looked older. We had been told that there could be undercover alcohol enforcement personnel so we were erring on the side of caution so we wouldn't get our group in trouble.

 

On cruises, I have seen waiters taking away glasses from teens in the atrium. So maybe they are tasked with watching out for this. And supposedly if an adult is caught giving booze to a kid, surely they are risking being kicked off the ship at the next port.

[RickEk]

I was on the December 26-30 sailing and signed my son up for the teen club. I believed that he was safe on that ship in terms of drinking alcohol. I was wrong. I got the call from the teen club (I wasn't in my cabin - they left a message). They said my son was drunk, and they told him to leave. They wanted me to come up to talk to them.

 

Aside from the issue I have with my son for his own behavior is this:

 

How in the hell did a minor get served? He told me another teen (who I confirmed did also get kicked out) got a hold of his dad's card and ordered martinis!

 

Secondly, and this is a big one - why would they just tell a drunk teen to leave? What if he had gone overboard or who knows what?! When I arrived, no one could tell me where he was - only that he was kicked out.

 

I am very disappointed in the way this was handled.

 

So when you spoke to the Passenger Services manager on board about this issue, what did they say? And if you didn't speak to that person, you certainly should have...

[cruzsnooze]

I was on the December 26-30 sailing and signed my son up for the teen club. I believed that he was safe on that ship in terms of drinking alcohol. I was wrong. I got the call from the teen club (I wasn't in my cabin - they left a message). They said my son was drunk, and they told him to leave. They wanted me to come up to talk to them.

 

Aside from the issue I have with my son for his own behavior is this:

 

How in the hell did a minor get served? He told me another teen (who I confirmed did also get kicked out) got a hold of his dad's card and ordered martinis!

 

Secondly, and this is a big one - why would they just tell a drunk teen to leave? What if he had gone overboard or who knows what?! When I arrived, no one could tell me where he was - only that he was kicked out.

 

I am very disappointed in the way this was handled.

You should be disappointed in your teen son who with a friend stole a card and ordered Martini's, it is easier to blame the cruise line then your son of course.

[jennifers490]

aren't there also cameras at all bars? i am sure they could get to the bottom of when they got drinks if they got them from a bar?

 

i agree security should have held them for their own safety and that of other passengers if they were drunk.

[own]

You should be disappointed in your teen son who with a friend stole a card and ordered Martini's, it is easier to blame the cruise line then your son of course.

 

Perhaps you should go back and read my post slower. The first issue I pointed out I had was indeed with my son. Go ahead and reread it - I'll wait.

[own]

So when you spoke to the Passenger Services manager on board about this issue, what did they say? And if you didn't speak to that person, you certainly should have...

 

He said there was a lot going on that night - pipes had burst and there was flooding, so there was a lot of resources dealing with that issue. That being said, he said there'd now be an investigation. He'd backtrack at the teen club, and follow the path of the booze from there. He said if this had happened before our stop at Grand Cayman, my son would have likely been booted. If he finds out who is responsible for service, that person will be given a one way ticket out of their job. He said these things were taken seriously and that it becomes a matter of Federal Investigation and a case will be opened now that I spoke to him.

 

I'm not sure if he was just legit or telling me what he thought I wanted to hear. He also suggested I punch my son in the kidney if I wanted to get his attention, adding that I could bring son to him in the morning for a lecture if I'd like.

[ar1950]

......... He also suggested I punch my son in the kidney if I wanted to get his attention, adding that I could bring son to him in the morning for a lecture if I'd like.

 

Maybe a little extreme, but, maybe he needs some discipline....???? I mean I remember being that age, but, I also knew my limitations (I think that my parents had something to do with that). Good luck.

Edited January 3, 2014 by ar1950

[rdsqrl]

He's 16; don't you think you're over-reacting a little? I mean, if he were 10, sure, holy crap. But in a year, he'll be in college and I'm pretty sure alcohol will be involved there and with no "teen club" staff to hold his hand.

[Austcruiser84]

Who is to say a crew member served the other teen? People keep alcohol in their staterooms; what's to say that the other teen didn't swipe it from his parents' mini bar?

[AE_Collector]

A trip to the brig might have been a good outcome as well as being a safe place to hold them. However, we have all probably seen parents that would then read the riot act to the ships personnel and threaten to sue haven't we! (Just a general comment from the ships point of view, not directed at the OP specifically)

Edited January 3, 2014 by AE_Collector
Typo

[Times Prince]

He said there was a lot going on that night - pipes had burst and there was flooding, so there was a lot of resources dealing with that issue. That being said, he said there'd now be an investigation. He'd backtrack at the teen club, and follow the path of the booze from there. He said if this had happened before our stop at Grand Cayman, my son would have likely been booted. If he finds out who is responsible for service, that person will be given a one way ticket out of their job. He said these things were taken seriously and that it becomes a matter of Federal Investigation and a case will be opened now that I spoke to him.

 

I'm not sure if he was just legit or telling me what he thought I wanted to hear. He also suggested I punch my son in the kidney if I wanted to get his attention, adding that I could bring son to him in the morning for a lecture if I'd like.

This sounds like you brought it up to the proper authorities while onboard and they would investigate, with severe consequences to those who served alcohol to minors.

 

This being the case, why are you airing the problem here? Yes, what the Passenger Services Manager says is legit. That person is one of the senior officers on the ship, reporting to the Captain.

Edited January 3, 2014 by Times Prince

[Host Jazzbeau]

I think the point OP wanted to make was that it was negligent to send an obviously drunk teen away from the teen club with no escort. I think I remember another post some time ago with similar treatment, so it may be ship policy. But it's not a good policy.

[Austcruiser84]

I think the point OP wanted to make was that it was negligent to send an obviously drunk teen away from the teen club with no escort. I think I remember another post some time ago with similar treatment, so it may be ship policy. But it's not a good policy.

 

Firstly, we don't know all the details, so jumping to the attack against the teen club staff is not appropriate.

 

Secondly, we are told the teen was "drunk". Is that the word used by the crew? Was he tipsy, or was he blind drunk? If he had alcohol on his breath, but was walking about then I could understand staff asking him to leave.

 

We don't have all the facts. I'm not saying the OP is making this up, but I'm not discounting the possibility, nor am I discounting the possibility that we are receiving the emotive version of events.

[ar1950]

I think the point OP wanted to make was that it was negligent to send an obviously drunk teen away from the teen club with no escort. I think I remember another post some time ago with similar treatment, so it may be ship policy. But it's not a good policy.

 

Hmm.....no that was the second question. The first was: How did my minor child get drunk on Ruby?

 

At least that was the heading on the OP's original post. And, yeah, sending the kid out of the teen club was probably not the best thing to do (of course my understanding is that if the parents give permission for the kid to leave how can the crew do anything else?).

Edited January 3, 2014 by ar1950

[calimn]

Wow this really is a polarizing topic - so might as well add my view. First if the person had a valid card that was valid for alcohol you need to cut the server some slack. The card doesn't say the person's age and some teen's do look older - my son is 21 and looks young but with his beard changed how people perceived him. I was amazed at the people who did not card him when we were in San Francisco over the last week

 

For the OP I would take the official up on his offer to talk to you son. Hearing from someone else how much this could have messed up a lot of things (if he got kicked off) may make him think about doing it again and that could be valuable to him as he gets older. I speak from experience as had a 18 year old who got arrested for a "minor in possession" in California and though painful has taught her a lot (and yes at 17 on a cruise she did get drinks she admitted to us after the cruise). Much more impact then when we were kids.

 

I also perfectly understand posting about this - sometimes it is good to just hear others thoughts. Good luck with you son

[BruceMuzz]

EVERY family holiday cruise - and Christmas especially - half the teens on the ship are playing games trying to get their hands - and mouths - on alcohol.

Many succeed.

 

Some pilfer bottles from the mini-bar.

Some steal drinks from lounge tables when the owners are away dancing.

Some steal bottles from wine or beverage displays.

Some sneak into bar or housekeeping pantries and finish half consumed glasses that were left behind.

Some buy it ashore and smuggle it onboard.

Some drink ashore and return drunk to the ship.

Some repeatedly claim their cabin key card is lost, hoping that when the replacement is made, the staff will forget to flag it as underage.

Some call room service and order alcohol under a parent's name.

Some parents provide alcohol to their children and then blame the cruise line when the kid misbehaves and gets caught.

Some steal bottles from flambé carts in the dining room.

Some wait until their idiot neighbors place a box of duty free bottles outside the cabin for luggage collection on the final night of the cruise. Party Time..............

There are always a few barely legal "adults" who are willing to buy it for them.

 

And in every one of these cases, we end up with enraged parents asking why the cruise line is allowing their children to consume alcohol.

If the parents raised their children responsibly, the cruise line would not have to be responsible for them.

 

Children behaving like children is NOT the problem.

Parents who cannot act like responsible adults IS the problem.

[Austcruiser84]

EVERY family holiday cruise - and Christmas especially - half the teens on the ship are playing games trying to get their hands - and mouths - on alcohol.

Many succeed.

 

Some pilfer bottles from the mini-bar.

Some steal drinks from lounge tables when the owners are away dancing.

Some steal bottles from wine or beverage displays.

Some sneak into bar or housekeeping pantries and finish half consumed glasses that were left behind.

Some buy it ashore and smuggle it onboard.

Some drink ashore and return drunk to the ship.

Some repeatedly claim their cabin key card is lost, hoping that when the replacement is made, the staff will forget to flag it as underage.

Some call room service and order alcohol under a parent's name.

Some parents provide alcohol to their children and then blame the cruise line when the kid misbehaves and gets caught.

Some steal bottles from flambé carts in the dining room.

Some wait until their idiot neighbors place a box of duty free bottles outside the cabin for luggage collection on the final night of the cruise. Party Time..............

There are always a few barely legal "adults" who are willing to buy it for them.

 

And in every one of these cases, we end up with enraged parents asking why the cruise line is allowing their children to consume alcohol.

If the parents raised their children responsibly, the cruise line would not have to be responsible for them.

 

Children behaving like children is NOT the problem.

Parents who cannot act like responsible adults IS the problem.

 

I must say that my opinion of many parents on my recent Princess cruise is low. I heard about parents allowing underrated children to drink. The thing that really annoyed me was hearing about the junior chef awards where most of the kids' parents didn't even show up to see them awarded by the Head Chef. Apparently it was embarrassing and a lot of older people were disgusted.

 

But back to alcohol...

 

I'd like to know how the OP punished their teen for this behaviour?

[Pam in CA]

Some parents provide alcohol to their children and then blame the cruise line when the kid misbehaves and gets caught.

 

...Parents who cannot act like responsible adults IS the problem.

I saw this on a Mexican Riviera cruise a few years ago on the Sapphire. Four teenagers were in an inside cabin across the hall from me; I don't know where the parents were but they weren't nearby. Every night, all night, the kids would drink and party, slamming the door every few minutes as people came and went. I reported it multiple times but nothing was done. One night at about 2:30 am after hours of noise and two reports that night, I looked out my door and there was one of the boy's mother in the hallway, drunk and partying with the kids. It was really bizarre.

 

I'm not saying that the OP is irresponsible (they clearly aren't) but it's possible the other teen's parents are or even got them drinks. I wouldn't be shocked if that were the case based on so many with the attitude that they paid their money and will do what they want.

[Ethel5]

I'd like to know how the OP dealt with her almost 17 year old son.

 

I feel bad that there might be a crew member losing his job because 2 idiot kids stole an ID and got drunk. The only way for crew to check age is the ship ID card and it doesn't have a photo.

 

I can also understand the youth leader asking the 2 boys to leave as the age group in that area is 13 to 17. Maybe the boys were acting drunker than they were to show off and the leaders didn't want the younger kids exposed to that.

 

I would suggest that the parents leave the kid at home with grandma for the next cruise.