How would you feel? Child accidentally left at kids club lobby during registration

[sft429]

I really think the horse is dead

 

I'd say that is up to the horse. It's not up to you.

[thepandabar]

No. I know he lacks attention at times. Typical man.

 

 

Please hold your husband to a higher standard than this. This is a very antiquated and toxic mentality. Fathers are just as capable as mothers of paying attention. Maybe it’s a problem with him and not the “typical man”. I can’t believe people still believe this in 2018.

 

 

 

Sent from my iPhone using Forums

[celebrity]

Both made a mistake.

 

Amen! Fault lies on both sides.

Your husband should have made sure your son was settled in.

Royal should have paged you and the problem would have been solved.

[celebrity]

No. I know he lacks attention at times. Typical man.

And yes I was defensive when people accused me of being a bad parent for simply going to the casino or saying that I am a horrible parent for asking about leaving my son on the ship. Those comments wouldn't make you defensive? Seriously?

 

 

Wow! What does that mean? Lacks attention, typical man yet you trusted him to drop off your son?

What a disrespectful statement about your husband and a slap in the face to all good men out there.

[xxHadleyxx]

ONCE AGAIN: When did I blame RCL for ANYTHING????????????????????????????????

In your OP, when you indicated they should have treated your son as a lost child and located you:

 

"

I guess I just don't understand why our son wasn't treated like a lost child and taken to guest services while they attempted to locate us. We told our son where we would be at but no one ever asked him this. "

 

 

Parents have different parenting styles. Neither is right or wrong. When our kids were that age they loved Adventure Ocean and preferred it to our company. Though we insisted they have meals with us and do the excursions. So I don't find fault in using it at all. This child must have liked it because he went back several times.

Yep.

[xxHadleyxx]

ONCE AGAIN: When did I blame RCL for ANYTHING????????????????????????????????

and then again, in the post below. See especially:

 

"I think its ridiculous that the staff didn't try and ask where we were or treat my child as they would a lost/abandoned child. "

and also this part, which indicates blame should not be on your husband, but rather shifted to RCI:

"Also, my son has medical issues and was not authorized to sign himself out. But, I guess that's somehow my husband's fault too."

 

 

You are totally wrong on so many levels. I am glad that you are such a perfect parent. Yes, my husband made a mistake. But I think its ridiculous that the staff didn't try and ask where we were or treat my child as they would a lost/abandoned child. We have never been on that ship before and he thought it was the kids club sign in. They were literally inside the doors of the kids club at tables. I think the staff could have told people they had to go further inside to properly sign their kids in. I don't know that I would have known it either. And I am not angry. I am just seeing what everyone else thinks to decide if its something I should pass on so it doesn't happen to any other children. Also, my son has medical issues and was not authorized to sign himself out. But, I guess that's somehow my husband's fault too. It's a shame this board has turned into to people trolling and attacking other people when they simply ask for advise.

 

Finally, I will point out that you did not ask for advice. You asked, in the title, how others would feel---and many of us would feel that we or our husband was at fault, be glad our child handled it so well, and move on. Many of us would never think to fault the staff in the situation described.

 

 

and in the OP you asked if it is ok or not:

 

 

"So, my question is whether everything thinks this is okay or not? It could have been hours before we knew that our son was not in the kids club. "

Many of us feel the staff response was OK and the appropriate response in the described circumstance.

You ask for opinions and then get angry, defensive and insulting (questioning reading comprehension ability, etc) towards those whos opinions you disagree with --- why?

Edited June 21, 2018 by xxHadleyxx

[NotThePest_Too]

and then again, in the post below. See especially:

 

"I think its ridiculous that the staff didn't try and ask where we were or treat my child as they would a lost/abandoned child. "

 

and also this part, which indicates blame should not be on your husband, but rather shifted to RCI:

"Also, my son has medical issues and was not authorized to sign himself out. But, I guess that's somehow my husband's fault too."

 

 

 

 

Finally, I will point out that you did not ask for advice. You asked, in the title, how others would feel---and many of us would feel that we or our husband was at fault, be glad our child handled it so well, and move on. Many of us would never think to fault the staff in the situation described.

 

 

and in the OP you asked if it is ok or not:

 

 

"So, my question is whether everything thinks this is okay or not? It could have been hours before we knew that our son was not in the kids club. "

Many of us feel the staff response was OK and the appropriate response in the described circumstance.

You ask for opinions and then get angry, defensive and insulting (questioning reading comprehension ability, etc) towards those whos opinions you disagree with --- why?

 

(y) BINGO!! Although t I didn't say this in any of my posts, I felt like the OP was trying to get up a posse to ride off and get those bad guys.

 

In the words of Judge Milian (People's Court), Say it forget it; write it regret it.

 

Ramona

[coops]

We were just off the Allure on Sunday and had a few issues with the kids cub that we have not had on any of our 14 other cruises on multiple lines so I am wondering what other people's thoughts are on the issue we experience and give a warning to other parents so it doesn't happen to them. So, here's what happened:On the first night my husband went to take our son to the Adventure Ocean club. Because it was the first night, they had sign up tables in the lobby area. My husband gave the crew member assisting him the information requested and thought that he had signed our son into the kids club. He didn't realize that this was just a registration table and the room our son needed to go to was further inside this hallway area. He walked away to go to the casino to meet me. About 30 minutes later our 9 year old called us from his iPad and said the kids club wouldn't let him in.

So, I went to the kids club to find out what happened and the crew member said my husband walked away so she tried calling our cabin and no one answered. So, she asked our son if he knew how to find his way to our cabin and he said yes. (This was our first night on the Allure and we were on deck 17, which you can only access from the rear elevators and stairwells- opposite of the kids club). So, he was told to go back to the cabin and wait for us. If we did not have the wifi package, there was no way for our son to contact us and we would have never known he was back in the cabin by himself. In addition, he got lost several times trying to find his way back to the cabin.

When I asked the crew member why they would let a 9 year old go back to the room by themselves, they said that they followed their policies. I guess I just don't understand why our son wasn't treated like a lost child and taken to guest services while they attempted to locate us. We told our son where we would be at but no one ever asked him this.

So, my question is whether everything thinks this is okay or not? It could have been hours before we knew that our son was not in the kids club.[/quote

 

To answer your question.

 

This is absolutely not okay that this happened. My husband would not hear the end of it from me for leaving him there and not following thru. But then again, I would have been the one to take him to make sure it was set up the right way.

 

That is just me. Not bashing you at all. :)

[The Sunset Glow]

Actually no. When we vacationed with our children, we vacationed WITH our children, meals, activities, shore excursions. The only time my son went to AO was when there was something going on there he wanted to do.

 

Same for us. The kids only go if they want to - not a babysitting service for us.

[mjkacmom]

Amen! Fault lies on both sides.

Your husband should have made sure your son was settled in.

Royal should have paged you and the problem would have been solved.

What problem?

[Eslader]

No. I know he lacks attention at times. Typical man.

 

Based on your boorishness throughout this thread I imagine you'd have some choice words to anyone who wrote "typical woman" in response to something you did. So perhaps you could leave the misandry at the door, hmm? We're not making assumptions about you based on your genitalia, and would thank you to extend the same courtesy to us.

[wendychloecruiser]

Can you guys wait a sec while I go refill my popcorn.....?

[SciFiGuy1960]

[myfuzzy]

http://78.media.tumblr.com/0bf2d93a7654f415a69172d544a22a5d/tumblr_n1pbldGyT21rm9sqwo1_r1_400.gif

[lovescats5]

As we take my Granddaughter to AO we talk about the best way to get there and then back to the room. If parents would make sure their children knew what way to go the kids would not get lost. At 10 my Granddaughter knew how to get to AO better than I did. We were lucky, however, because we have been in suites and have gotten a ship phone from the genie so we make sure she calls when she arrives and again when she is leaving to come back to the room. This is arranged with the AO staff at the time we sign her up. I know I am old fashioned, my son tells me that all the time, but at what time did we decide to blame other people for something we should have checked out before hand. I know I will get some grief for this view but even though the kid's club members might have handled it a little differently the parents should make sure their kids know how to get around the boat. And all kids clubs operate the same. When my granddaughter was 4 and 5 it was the same policy on 2 other lines as the one on RCCL when she was 9 and 10.

[Lady Chew]

 

OMG - Mr Chew is upstairs right now wondering what made me laugh so hard!!

[Margy23]

I hesitate to comment because I think this molehill has become a big enough mountain, but I do want to compliment your son on his level headedness and ability to take care of himself. I hope he hasn't heard how big an issue this has become, but even more I hope you and your husband have made him feel really good about his handling of the situation (and I think you and your husband should feel good about the training you've given him).

 

Margy

[RAC630]

We were on that cruise on Allure as well, and had a 6 yr old attending Adventure Ocean. We signed her up in the afternoon and brought her to Explorers that same evening. The counselors were very cautious during both check in and check out. I observed parents signing up kids in the lobby Sunday evening. It was very crowded with parents dropping off and parents signing up kids. There were only 2 counselors sitting at a table signing up kids. I don’t know why anyone would assume they should leave a child (even a 9 year old) in the midst of all the people that were milling around. Yes, once the child told a staff member they needed help, the staff member should have responded differently and made sure the child was reunited with a parent. However, the child should never have been left in the lobby in the first place. There was no way anything in that lobby would have indicated that was the correct thing to do.

[brillohead]

Yes, once the child told a staff member they needed help, the staff member should have responded differently and made sure the child was reunited with a parent. However, the child should never have been left in the lobby in the first place. There was no way anything in that lobby would have indicated that was the correct thing to do.

 

Ah, but therein lies the rub -- the child DIDN'T ask for help, and when asked by a staffer, he said he knew how to get back to his cabin....

 

 

So, she asked our son if he knew how to find his way to our cabin and he said yes. (This was our first night on the Allure and we were on deck 17, which you can only access from the rear elevators and stairwells- opposite of the kids club). So, he was told to go back to the cabin and wait for us.

 

 

So how exactly should the staffer have known that the child needed help -- ESP ???? If he had said he didn't know how to get back to the cabin, help would have been provided. But if the 9yo says he can find his way, and children 9yo and even younger are often allowed to roam the ship without adult supervision, what do you think the staffer should have done?

[dcgrumpy]

Ah, but therein lies the rub -- the child DIDN'T ask for help, and when asked by a staffer, he said he knew how to get back to his cabin....

 

 

 

 

 

So how exactly should the staffer have known that the child needed help -- ESP ???? If he had said he didn't know how to get back to the cabin, help would have been provided. But if the 9yo says he can find his way, and children 9yo and even younger are often allowed to roam the ship without adult supervision, what do you think the staffer should have done?

 

 

Exactly.

 

9 year olds are allowed to walk around alone. My kids were allowed to have some freedom at that age. Should they be rounding up all 9 and 10 year olds and bringing them to Guest Services even though they don't claim to be lost?

[qa4ever]

Exactly.

 

9 year olds are allowed to walk around alone. My kids were allowed to have some freedom at that age. Should they be rounding up all 9 and 10 year olds and bringing them to Guest Services even though they don't claim to be lost?

 

I think the difference is that this wasn't a 9 year old just randomly walking around the ship. This was a 9 year old that said to a kid's club member that he thinks his parents signed him in to the kids club and obviously didn't. The staff should have realized that the parents may not have given this child permission to wander around. Staff should not be making assumptions that the child's parents would be ok with the child wandering around.

 

Just because the father made a mistake and didn't sign in the child correctly does not give the kid's club staff the right to act irresponsibly too.

 

We never would have allowed our 9 year old to walk freely around the ship and just because a 9 year old says they know the way to their room doesn't mean they actually would be able to find it. Especially on the first night of the cruise!

[Alter Ego]

I think the difference is that this wasn't a 9 year old just randomly walking around the ship. This was a 9 year old that said to a kid's club member that he thinks his parents signed him in to the kids club and obviously didn't. The staff should have realized that the parents may not have given this child permission to wander around. Staff should not be making assumptions that the child's parents would be ok with the child wandering around.

 

Just because the father made a mistake and didn't sign in the child correctly does not give the kid's club staff the right to act irresponsibly too.

 

We never would have allowed our 9 year old to walk freely around the ship and just because a 9 year old says they know the way to their room doesn't mean they actually would be able to find it. Especially on the first night of the cruise!

 

But you are now assuming that they knew the child didn’t walk himself TO the kids club after randomly wandering around the ship. Like another poster (who was actually there) said - it was busy. So, the person that spoke to the 9 year old may not have been the same as spoke to the father. After all, that person would have actively told the father to not leave without him had it been done in front of him.

 

I certainly don’t fault the OP for being angry, but I can understand Royal’s actions as I’m able to view them from a distance.

[ONECRUISER]

Agree, well said...

[The_Big_M]

Staff should not be making assumptions that the child's parents would be ok with the child wandering around.

 

So instead you believe staff should make assumptions that the parents are not ok with the child wandering around!? Moreover, the parents were visibly not near so had effectively shown they were fine with their child being unattended.

 

The staff asked the child if they were fine to go back to the cabin. The child said they were. As the ship rules entitle kids that age to that freedom, they can't just detain them because they assume something is wrong.

 

You may not like the rules, but it's not as though staff can wilfully override them when there's no grounds to do so.

[one_beachlvr]

The biggest mistake was the husband's. He was obviously in a hurry to get to the casino and left his son without making sure he was properly signed in. My son and I were on a cruise when he was 9 and he was enrolled in the 9-11 year old group. That group gave a choice whether the child could sign themselves in and out or not. I gave him permission and he had absolutely no issues finding us or getting back to the cabin. It is a HUGE liability for the childcare staff to keep a child who is not properly registered and signed in. It sounds like the staff was trying to get the husband's attention but they couldn't because they obviously noticed him walking off. If they were busy registering other children or answering questions of other parents, they may not have been able to run after him and may not have even known at the time which kid belonged to him! They were left in a bad situation by a parent who obviously wasn't paying attention and should not be held responsible. When the child said he knew his way back to the cabin, and he had a way to communicate with his parents, they tried to make the best decision possible. We don't know what paperwork/payment/permissions, etc... were left undone by the husband so it's hard to say that the crew had a whole lot of other options. Agree that if the child said he didn't know his way back and/or had no way to communicate with his parents that security probably would have been called.