Review World Cruise Queen Victoria 2023

[roscoe39]

I have been asked to post the enclosed review on behalf of my friend Hyacinth on the WC for the QV..

 

Review of Queen Victoria World Cruise 2023

By H. Bucket 01 April 2023

 

We had decided to do a portion of  Cunard’s  World Centennial Voyage which was a celebration of the first World Cruise by the Laconia in 1923.

 

We were disappointed on arriving at the cruise terminal to find that although it was meant to be a recreation of that  particular world cruise the ship was in fact a new modern cruise ship -  the  “Queen Victoria” and instead of us being in a time period comparable to the 1920s we would in fact be surrounded by all the modern conveniences of a current Cruiseship and not in fact a recreation of the original Liner the Laconia.

 

I had only packed costumes for the 1920s.

 

We had heard that Cunard was a very class conscious shipping line and with each class strictly  divided but we were disturbed that  when we had arrived at the embarkation lounge to board the ship  we were seated in amongst passengers who were traveling in Britannia Class and that we were not given our own lounge or seating arrangements.  We also were disturbed that contrary to the photos on the advertising brochures,  we had to carry our own hand luggage onboard to our suite and were not personally escorted by one of the crew - carrying our bags.

 

We should have been alerted to these “slipping”  standards when on booking our trip - last minute on a cut price internet site, that we were refused our first choice suite as “ apparently” it was in a higher category than we had booked and Cunard wanted us to pay extra to have the stateroom of our choice just because it was a Queens Suite, rather than Princess which we had booked and paid for.  Our second choice  Princess Suite 5002, was also not available because there was someone already in that cabin and the agent refused to move that person so that we could have our cabin of choice. Not acceptable.

 

On arriving at our rooms after stopping by the Pursers office to enquire as why our  requested free upgrade had not been granted we found that our luggage was already waiting for us. This was the first sign that things may be on the up  so we left to have lunch expecting our butler to unpack for us. You can imagine our surprise when returning to our stateroom after lunch to find that our luggage was still where we had left it and still packed. Apparently the butlers are only provided for Queens Suites! A definite sign of a class distinction on the ship! We were therefore forced into unpacking ourselves…. certainly not what you would expect on a “luxury” line.

 

The next day after leaving port the previous night  we were subjected to the whole day with nothing to look at whatsoever except the sea! You would think that the Captain would have found something interesting for us to sail past to break the tedium. Another shortcoming and bad planning by Cunard.

 

With the extortionate cost of drycleaning on board, I had decided to do some laundry and you can imagine my shock on hearing of the following  3 incidents from other passengers while  I was waiting for the washing to be completed.

 

Four people had just been removed from the ship for fighting in the laundry room. Two women were having an argument and had called their respective husbands -  one of whom hit the other husband with an iron and the group was disembarked at the next port.

 

In another incident a lady had a cocktail dress in the washing machine and when she returned it had been stolen. That night at a cocktail party she saw a woman wearing her dress and when she approached and challenged the lady  she was told to “prove it” and Security was not interested in her complaint.

 

In a third incident two ladies had an argument in the laundry room and when one returned she found that a chocolate bar had been placed in her dryer ruining all of her clothes.

 

I think that this shows that there is a culture of aggression and entitlement on board and that the  police should travel onboard permanently just  to ensure the safety of its passengers.

 

There was also a reported 55 people dying on board during the World Cruise. Surely they should have a coroner on board permanently to investigate these deaths and mitigate this unexplained pandemic.

 

We were distraught when we decided one night to try out the Queens Grill Dining room and were turned away at the door by the Maitre “d” who told us that we were unable to dine there as we were in the Princess Grill Dining room - across the foyer.  Another sign of Cunard's discriminatory policies.

 

This was further exacerbated by one evening when  a group of Britannia class passengers were stopped at the door to our Princess Grills Dining room.   Fortunately they were turned away as they were obviously - by the way that they were dressed in Polo shirts and Jeans were not traveling Princess Grills.   Why they thought that they could dine with us I do not know when they had only paid for a lower class. Such entitlement.

 

This was an  entirely unnecessary incident as  they had been  able to freely transit unchallenged up the exclusive stairs to our Grills deck.  Surely there must be some sort of security system to keep these people out of the area. It was bad enough that we had to travel up to deck 11 in the same lift as some of these people  but where will the loosening up of standards end? We kept swiping our cards in the key slot in the lift  to make the point that any other passengers  in the lift without the same card should feel a sense of shame.  Sadly they did not seem to take any notice.

 

The Brittania classes have plenty of dining rooms available to them,  the MDR, the Steak House, the Lido and the Golden Lion. We only have the Princess Grills Dining room. The constant reiteration of the class separations was exhausting.

 

On a further note, and as an example of Cunard's strange culture was that they had a “World Cruise Party” one night for those traveling on the World Cruise and we were denied entry as we were only on the ship for 22 days. Despite our arguing that we were also on “the World Cruise” and the length of time we were onboard should not matter. It was further exacerbated by  later in the voyage they had a Diamond and Platinum party and  we were also denied entry because this is our first cruise and supposedly this was for people who had been on the line for 75 days or longer. 

 

Once again Discriminatory!  

 

The longer World Cruise passengers even had an area in one of the lounges roped off for their sole use, this is meant to be an egalitarian world and this sort of discrimination should not be allowed!

 

As a perfect example of the “cliquiness” of Cunard. There was a group on board called “the Anchor Group”. This group of passengers,  numbering what seemed to be several hundred were constantly all over the ship in the middle of all of the activities, public rooms and bars drinking and laughing and creating general merriment.. They seemed to be enjoying themselves far to much for it to be acceptable in polite company and so much an extent that they made those of us who were not part of their group stand out and want to join in with them.

Something I would not expect on our holiday. Cunard should either not allow these groups to form or alternatively organize the ship in such a way that people could create their own groups to be able to enjoy the facilities to the same extent rather than be left to fester on themselves. I find it very selfish of Cunard to not promote this sort of comradeship in such social media groups such as facebook. Very short sighted..

 

In Keeping up Appearances we invited the Captain one night to dine with us. It was unfortunate that the particular day in question was one where  the ship was traveling through a force 11 gale  - why the captain had chosen to do this I do not know, however just before dinner he had the cheek to send us “his regrets” as he was needed on the bridge. We found this insulting as we were paying guests and in fact paying his wages. I think that he should have had the courtesy to join us for dinner that night and the excuse of being “needed on the bridge” sounded like a “fob” and was offensive. There was no reason why he could not have joined us and left one of his subordinates in charge. On that note, whilst we were traversing so called “Pirate Alley” we were made to extinguish external lighting on our balconies and there was ugly Razor wire and Security Dishes established along the ships exterior making the ship appear ugly. This should not have been permitted as it spoilt all of our photos.

 

It was during this particular period that one day I noticed that whilst sitting on my balcony  - where I might mention there appeared to be some rust on the steel divider, that there was some black smog emanating from the ships funnel with the soot falling all around us and into my drink. I will be expecting a personal apology from the ship for this incident as it meant that I had to refill my glass and wait inside ten minutes until the incident past.

 

I can not understand why the ship would schedule a port stop on an Island on a Sunday when most shops are closed or the residents are at church. You would think that these islands would forgo their religion so that they could entertain us and open their shops for us. Instead we were forced to visit their towns and islands and entertain ourselves. Bad planning on the part of Cunard. And while on the subject We were further shocked and extremely disappointed when the Ship canceled our call into Tonga. The only reason that we had  booked this trip was to visit Tonga where my best friend's great aunt twice removed had once visited in the 1950s and I had always wanted to do the same. We shall be requesting a full refund from Cunard plus expenses and a free cruise for the inconvenience. 

 

I have sent my complaints to Cunard's head office but so far have had no response.

[NE John]

Poor Richard! 

[roscoe39]

46 minutes ago, NE John said:

Poor Richard! 

im more concerned about what happened to poor old Onslow and Rose 

[bluetardis]

Hyacinth and Elizabeth

[naturelovergirl]

I’m sure Sheridan Bucket would never stand for this treatment to his darling mother

 

😏

[NE John]

56 minutes ago, roscoe39 said:

im more concerned about what happened to poor old Onslow and Rose 

Daisy too… But at least Onslow looked good in a tuxedo. 

[ballroom-cruisers]

Lovely tongue-in-cheek review, roscoe39 - took me a few intakes of breath before I realised - though the ultra large font had me moving back away from the screen, as well as the content!

[surreymum]

Was Onslow in Britannia class wearing his string vests on Gala nights?

[Mickb]

Brilliant - sure there may be some red faces reading this. Keep it up!

[exlondoner]

O wad some Pow'r the giftie gie us
To see oursels as ithers see us!

[Victoria2]

Clever

Love spoof reviews although I would have thought Mrs B had had a bucket full of Cunard on QE2! 😄

 

 

[alibabacruisers]

Love that episode!  I say the same thing Poor Richard while watching every episode!  LOL

[safarigal]

Roscoe, you are too much! I love this - I'm so hoping you will be on QV again next year to break up the tedium of us mere mortals :). What is winter without reading your blog?

[Down-Unders]

Excellent!

[RICHARD@SEA]

DEAREST ROSCOE - 

 

with great pain I read about the passing of DAME EDNA - 

I thought if anyone would of known & CRUISED with her - it would be Roscoe....

 

So I send my condolences to all Aussies & Brits  - a sad loss of one of the GRAND DAMES of THE & SEAS!!!

[exlondoner]

32 minutes ago, RICHARD@SEA said:

DEAREST ROSCOE - 

 

with great pain I read about the passing of DAME EDNA - 

I thought if anyone would of known & CRUISED with her - it would be Roscoe....

 

So I send my condolences to all Aussies & Brits  - a sad loss of one of the GRAND DAMES of THE & SEAS!!!

Am I the only person in the universe who didn’t find him/her terribly funny, no more than mildly at best?

[D&N]

45 minutes ago, exlondoner said:

Am I the only person in the universe who didn’t find him/her terribly funny, no more than mildly at best?

No.  I had great respect for his ability to make a living from the character, but I never found him remotely funny.

[roscoe39]

5 hours ago, RICHARD@SEA said:

DEAREST ROSCOE - 

 

with great pain I read about the passing of DAME EDNA - 

I thought if anyone would of known & CRUISED with her - it would be Roscoe....

 

So I send my condolences to all Aussies & Brits  - a sad loss of one of the GRAND DAMES of THE & SEAS!!!

thank you for your thoughts.

 

The entire Australasian population is in mourning for our fellow country woman and megastar. The loss of her bridesmaid from our very own dear country Madge a few years ago is still a trauma that we are only just now beginning to come out of and now sadly we are plunged back into a period of deep depression once again that is only equal to that felt by the passing of our late Queen who incidentally was also a great fan.

 

Never again to hear her greeting of "Hello Possum" or be hit in the head by a errant bunch of gladiolus thrown from the stage,  the World (and Moonie Ponds)  is sadly a little less bright, a little less cheerful and a damned sight less funny.

 

RIP Dame Edna - you will be sadly missed  

 

(and incidentally, I did meet her character Barry H once -  a great friend of a dear friend of mine -  a terrific raconteur and wit around the dinner table and not only an entertainer on stage)

Edited April 23, 2023 by roscoe39

[roscoe39]

On 4/22/2023 at 8:06 PM, safarigal said:

Roscoe, you are too much! I love this - I'm so hoping you will be on QV again next year to break up the tedium of us mere mortals :). What is winter without reading your blog?

just sent you an email, hope you re both all sorted and will not be stranded in 'old Blighty. keep up updated and see you next year on the QV? (seriously thought that after your last to trips on the QM2 that you would have learnt that there is no better ship in the fleet than the QV!

[tmacktravels]

Brilliant Roscoe. 🤣👏