Alternative to heels for a heel girl?

[toxicfairy]

So I am 5'1" and I love my heels. I mean 4 to 5 inch heels. Wore them on every cruise or dinner date. 2 years ago on my way to the beach a young man ran a stop sign and  rammed my truck. Leaving me with a shattered heel , my subtalar joint broken in 4 places and my femur broken at the hip and again lower. I over came and am walking BUT my foot/ankle won't hold at that angle in high heels (although I have pushed  it in platform style heels🤣). Give me ideas. I'm NOT a flat shoe girl. I'm short and I've got thick legs, flats make me look chunky.

 

 

[jsn55]

The recovery from the accident must have been excruciating, glad you're up and going again.  If you can't wear heels now ... and you shouldn't push that or you'll pay big time when you're 'older' ... you're left with flats, right? 

 

Seems to me that I see all kinds of really cute shoes in catalogues and on Zappos.  But I have huge feet ... I'm 6' tall and wear size 11 shoes, 12 with fat socks ... so I have to be careful what styles I wear.  Probably the best approach would be to order shoes you like the looks of from a source with free returns. 

 

I can tell you one thing for sure ... I got a pair of custom-made 'orthopedic' shoes from Germany after I had a hip replacement.  I had serious arthritis pain for several years and was game to try anything.  They're enormous, ugly, heavy and seriously comfortable.  I can walk forever in them; first pair lasted ten years and I'm now on the second pair.  When I first saw them, I couldn't imagine wearing them out in public.  But the comfort was amazing. 

 

So I decided to forget I was wearing these monsters and pretend that they were nice black loafers.  I wear them anytime there's lots of walking ... I'm not sure I'd be walking at all today without them.  

[LindaD22]

I have had surgery on both feet with permanent hardware in one. Heels are just not an option anymore for me, either. After much trial and error, and many returns, I’ve found low wedge heels to be the most comfortable. I can wear these all night without any discomfort. The heel is low, but enough to give a more dressy look. 

 

Edited June 10, 2023 by LindaD22

[jsn55]

Oh yeah!  I forgot to mention the hundred(s) of pairs I went through to find shoes I could wear without pain.  Goodwill throws out the red carpet when I drive up.  

[slidergirl]

Similar issue here.  1.5” heel is as high as I can go.   Fortunately I wasn’t a heels fan in the first place.   Some to look at: Teva and Sorel have “flatform” sandals.  A platform but no heel drop.  Teva has some in leather.  

[toxicfairy]

5 hours ago, LindaD22 said:

I have had surgery on both feet with permanent hardware in one. Heels are just not an option anymore for me, either. After much trial and error, and many returns, I’ve found low wedge heels to be the most comfortable. I can wear these all night without any discomfort. The heel is low, but enough to give a more dressy look. 

 

Those gold ones are really cute!! And yes I have a rod in my femur and a plate in my foot😡

[katmu]

I have to agree with slidergirl.  I fractured my right leg in 23 places when I fell off my roof in 2018, and a low wedge of about 1.5” is about as high as I can manage now.  I do think in a gold or silver metallic they still look pretty dressy.  Good luck.

[awhfy]

A nice gladiator style sandal with a tiny wedge (under 1”) or what slidergirl said. I can’t do over 1” after numerous foot surgeries 

[Mum2Mercury]

On 6/10/2023 at 8:56 AM, toxicfairy said:

So I am 5'1" and I love my heels.

I'm 4'11" and I understand your love of heels!  So elegant and flattering to the leg.  

 

However, after 40 I developed Plantar Fasciitis. It may not've been as immediate and shocking as your accident, but it's limited my footwear just as much.  I had to give away so many nice shoes; fortunately my two daughters wear my same shoe size; my loss was their gain.  

On 6/10/2023 at 8:56 AM, toxicfairy said:

Give me ideas. I'm NOT a flat shoe girl. I'm short and I've got thick legs, flats make me look chunky.

First, remember that you're your own worst critic.  You're pointing out your shortcomings, but it's likely that others don't notice them nearly as much as you yourself do.  Still, here are a couple thoughts: 

- I don't see being short as a shortcoming.  I like my height!  I'm adorable, and I bet you are too!

- Do you like wearing maxi skirts?  I know, I know, you'll have to hem them -- that's your and my cross to bear with every item of clothing, but you could have a pair of Nikes under a maxi skirt and no one would know.  

- Have you tried wedges?  They'll give you a bit a more height but also more support than those lovely heels to which you've become accustomed.  Wedges are my go-to now -- I have slip-on wedges, ankle-strap wedges, low wedges and higher wedges.  Go try some on at the store.

- Since you're learning what shoes you can wear, bring them home and wear them around on the carpet for a couple hours before you decide you're keeping them.  You don't always "figure it out" in 5 minutes walking up and down a store aisle.   

- Consider that even if your days in 4-5" heels are gone, you might be able to manage a 1-2" heel.  They aren't all granny-looking!  Another poster shared some lovely black and gold low-heel sandals.  Personally, I think those look great.  They're on the delicate side, which might balance against your self-proclaimed "thick legs".  

- I'm guessing, but I suspect you should avoid shoes with an ankle strap.  With thick legs, that'll probably divide your leg and exacerbate this problem.  

- Finally, don't push yourself and wear things you know are bad for you -- especially now while you're still healing.  It'll only injure you further, and you'll pay for it as you age.  Once you're fully healed, you might be able to wear heels to church or a wedding or a dinner date -- you know, places where you'll just walk in and then sit down.  But for now, I suggest that you pack up the heels you know you shouldn't wear and put them in the attic.  Don't let them sit in your closet reminding you of what you can't have -- focus instead on what you can have.

22 hours ago, jsn55 said:

I can tell you one thing for sure ... I got a pair of custom-made 'orthopedic' shoes from Germany after I had a hip replacement.

I can say something similar:  When I first developed my Plantar Fasciitis problems, I went through allllll the drug store inserts -- none of them worked.  I also didn't understand what I needed -- I needed support in the right places, not cushioning.  

 

Finally I got serious and went to a Podiatrist, who made me custom orthopedic inserts.  I only have one pair, and they slip into loafers, tennis shoes or boots, and they are sooooo comfortable.  I loved them from the first moment.  I can wear sandals or dressy shoes with very specific details, but I will never be without a pair of these inserts for my everyday shoes.  They weren't expensive either:  I paid the co-pay for a specialist doctor, and insurance paid the rest.  

 

 

Edited June 11, 2023 by Mum2Mercury

[toxicfairy]

I'm going to try some wedges and lower block heels. It's  just going to be a huge adjustment for me. I've been wearing heels since my young teen days and I'm 56 now. Never met  heel I couldn't walk upright in lol. I have low Self esteem but thats my cross to bear and somehow wearing heels always made me feel prettier, more self assured. Now I want comfort ( sexy comfort lol)

[Mum2Mercury]

8 minutes ago, toxicfairy said:

I'm going to try some wedges and lower block heels. It's  just going to be a huge adjustment for me. I've been wearing heels since my young teen days and I'm 56 now. Never met  heel I couldn't walk upright in lol. I have low Self esteem but thats my cross to bear and somehow wearing heels always made me feel prettier, more self assured. Now I want comfort ( sexy comfort lol)

Good for you -- you'll find things you'll find things you'll like.  I know that heels are lovely, but you are more than your footwear.  As you focus on things other than heels, you're going to find a whole lot of things between your go-to heels and clunky granny shoes.  

 

I'll argue with one word in your comment.  You don't just want comfort -- you NEED comfort.  This is a health choice.  You wouldn't argue if the doctor said you need a medicine or procedure.  This is no different.  

 

By the way, we're the same age.  

[jsn55]

I'll just share this for other women who may be tempted to wear shoes that aren't very good for their feet, just to satisfy vanity.   I've been super-healthy all my life, didn't even have a doctor until I was about 50.  In my late 50s, I discovered that the chronic pain in my right hip was from swinging myself up into my truck for 17 years, ignoring the running board.  By the time I had my hip replaced, I had screwed up my right knee by 'walking funny'.  After a few years of pain, I had that knee replaced. There was a little glitch; it was an excruciating recovery period.  Soon the left knee was giving me trouble, but I put that replacement off far too long.  Now I have one natural hip.  After extensive PT, hours in a warm-water therapy pool, and paying close attention to my shoes, I walk mostly pain-free.  I can wear a 2" wedge sandal on special occasions.  Makes me very happy and I am grateful.  So my message is: PAY ATTENTION!!!  I went through 15 years of pain to satisfy my vanity.  Ain't worth it.  

[Mum2Mercury]

On 6/11/2023 at 12:48 PM, jsn55 said:

I'll just share this for other women who may be tempted to wear shoes that aren't very good for their feet, just to satisfy vanity.   I've been super-healthy all my life, didn't even have a doctor until I was about 50.  In my late 50s, I discovered that the chronic pain in my right hip was from swinging myself up into my truck for 17 years, ignoring the running board.  By the time I had my hip replaced, I had screwed up my right knee by 'walking funny'.  After a few years of pain, I had that knee replaced. There was a little glitch; it was an excruciating recovery period.  Soon the left knee was giving me trouble, but I put that replacement off far too long.  Now I have one natural hip.  After extensive PT, hours in a warm-water therapy pool, and paying close attention to my shoes, I walk mostly pain-free.  I can wear a 2" wedge sandal on special occasions.  Makes me very happy and I am grateful.  So my message is: PAY ATTENTION!!!  I went through 15 years of pain to satisfy my vanity.  Ain't worth it.  

Here's what my daughter, who is a nurse, says about knees and hips: 

 

If you don't take care of your feet and ankles, your knees will go.  If your knees go, your hips will be next.  If your hips go, your mobility will be affected and -- once lost -- mobility is very hard to regain.  

[shipgeeks]

I used to be able to comfortably walk to work - 3+ miles - in heels.  On cruises I had no problem wearing heels all evening, every evening.

Now I can't wear them at all, due to balance problems.  I miss them, and have had to change much of my cruise wardrobe, while still wanting to dress up every evening, especially on the formal nights.  My current solution is dressy (black suede) ballet flats, and either a long gown/dress, or a pants outfit such as a velvet pantsuit with a great shape, or sequined pants and a fab top. All of those outfits come nearly to the floor, so my shoes are not as evident.....but I know I still can't pull off that walk that only heels would give me.  I guess I'm just glad I can still walk.

[jsn55]

Amazing the perspective that comes to us as we age, no?  You look back over the years and marvel how 'easy' it all was ... we did and wore whatever we wanted.  Now we do and wear things that help us enjoy ourselves while not tipping over!

[shipgeeks]

Exactly!  I was also going to mention that many of the young women on our last cruise wore white sneakers with their dresses, and looked very cute.  But if I did that it I think I would just look like a senior lady with foot issues.

[cruisemom42]

5 hours ago, shipgeeks said:

Exactly!  I was also going to mention that many of the young women on our last cruise wore white sneakers with their dresses, and looked very cute.  But if I did that it I think I would just look like a senior lady with foot issues.

 

LOL, I also fall prey to that thinking too. Like so many things, the latest styles can make one look like one is trying too hard, after a certain age.

 

But I also suspect most of us highly overestimate how much attention anyone else pays to our footwear unless it is wildly inappropriate. 

 

I started early having foot and ankle issues and right now am working my way toward a knee replacement, so I have accepted the need to wear "sensible footwear". I was never a heels person, but I do miss the days when I could go out and walk around Rome for hours wearing some cute flat loafers with little padding or arch support....

 

 

[slidergirl]

I got over the shoe thing in 2007, after I shattered my leg.  I had some flats, but I mostly lived in sneakers.  Morphed to all sneakers/hikers/trail runners after having to wear “nice” shoes for work at the hotels.  Now, I am a 90% sneakers/hikers/trail runners person.  Only took my pink high tops and my white low mesh sneakers to Europe last year.  No one screamed in horror when I wore one or the other with my dresses, even to dinner.  I don’t think of them as “sensible” anymore, but fun and funky.  At my age, I’ve earned the right to dress fun and funky and not care what people think.  I actually see more and more “mature” women wearing fun clothes and doing the fun hair colors.  

 

My day to go up to the mountains today was rained out.  Maybe tomorrow.  Thursday it’s my visit to my stylist.  After feeling very “off feed” for the past 4 days, I am feeling better today.  LC continues to be a pain to me.  

[KINGBOBOFTHENORTH]

Check out platform sneakers; they're huge right now and all the brands Nike, Adidas, Puma, Vans, Converse, etc have them.

[toxicfairy]

On 6/20/2023 at 7:27 AM, shipgeeks said:

Exactly!  I was also going to mention that many of the young women on our last cruise wore white sneakers with their dresses, and looked very cute.  But if I did that it I think I would just look like a senior lady with foot issues.

Exactly.  They might look " cute" but that's not the look I'm going for. I've done my teen yrs and my 20's. I'm 56 and when I dress up I'm going for a put together sexy yet sophisticated look not  "hey I've got clothes on what more do you want" look. I did find a couple pairs of lower heels that I can wear. And a pair of higher block heels with a platform front that I can wear ( sounds clunky but they're actually not).

[zoncom]

Kitten heals, sort of sandals with an 1nch heel.

[jsn55]

On 6/24/2023 at 10:46 AM, toxicfairy said:

Exactly.  They might look " cute" but that's not the look I'm going for. I've done my teen yrs and my 20's. I'm 56 and when I dress up I'm going for a put together sexy yet sophisticated look not  "hey I've got clothes on what more do you want" look. I did find a couple pairs of lower heels that I can wear. And a pair of higher block heels with a platform front that I can wear ( sounds clunky but they're actually not).

I cannot imagine wearing white sneakers with a nice dress and looking anything but ridiculous!  If you want to wear white sneakers, then put on a pair of white pants and look perfectly cute.  

[shipgeeks]

The white sneakers (usually trim, non-clunky ones) were mostly worn with short white summer dresses on White Night.  Sometimes they wore them with other summery dresses, as well.

Me, I get cold in any place with AC, so all my evening cruise clothes have long sleeves, even for Bahamas and Caribbean cruises.

[Mum2Mercury]

On 6/20/2023 at 7:27 AM, shipgeeks said:

Exactly!  I was also going to mention that many of the young women on our last cruise wore white sneakers with their dresses, and looked very cute.  But if I did that it I think I would just look like a senior lady with foot issues.

As a teacher, I wore white Keds (or similar) with simple knit dresses -- think Lands End type things -- with a cardigan for much of my career.  Perfect teacher outfit and cute.  

[cruisemom42]

13 hours ago, jsn55 said:

I cannot imagine wearing white sneakers with a nice dress and looking anything but ridiculous!  If you want to wear white sneakers, then put on a pair of white pants and look perfectly cute.  

 

I think Giada de Laurentiis looks pretty cute wearing them in Italy: 

 

 

 

 

Edited June 26, 2023 by cruisemom42