Suggestion to End Formal Night Bickering

[obnurse]

I say leave well enough alone. We love formal night, but I could care less what others are wearing in the Princess Theater, casino, etc. Cigarette smoke in my face, chair hogs, and obnoxiously drunk people bother me. But what everyone else is wearing is of no concern to me. We leave our cabin looking great and that's all we care about. Why would I compromise my good time by getting upset about what someone else is wearing? The Princess website states, "Princess makes it easy to know what to pack and what to wear when you are dining on board." It doesn't suggest that is the standard for the whole evening or for any place other than the dining rooms. The Patter may say something else. Sounds like even Princess is ambivalent about this.

[harry]

You know the suggestions before you go. I did not appreciate the lack of code on NCL. People came to dinner in Jerans and t shirts. That is just so wrong. Even on land you go to a nice restaurant you put on a nice shirt and nice pair of pants

 

On formal nights Im okay with folks just wearing a suit. A tux looks cool. In fact i just bought on and have taken it on my honeymoon cruise.....different fron the one I wore at the wedding

 

i think a sport jacket is okay on the 4-5 day cruise formal nights

[SingerEsq]

If you are old enough you will remember when people used to dress up when they flew on airplanes. My mother dressed me in my best dress, gloves and black patent shoes for my first flight in the late 1960's. When was the last time you saw someone dressed like that on an airplane?

 

You were raised right! :) My partner and I don't go to that length, but when we fly we still wear pressed slacks and pressed shirts, appropriate shoes (it amazes me that people do not understand that flip-flops would be of no use in an emergency landing or evacuation). He was raised in an airline family and traveled much in the same way you did as a child. Old habits die hard ... which is a good thing.

 

To the poster about socioeconomic concerns, I bought my last tux for $130.00 at a suit outlet. The one before that for even less. The number of times I have worn them has far outweighted the cost. You can still dress nicely at bargain prices. It just takes some effort.

[mii]

Tom I do know that you meant well but this is going to become another one of the hundreds of threads about formal night, formal wear, jeans in the dining room etc. and ending up bickering an arguing.

 

Marilyn

[Nliedel]

One of the wonderful things on the boards is the wide variety of opinions and differing discussions. I never have a problem with formal night threads. Yes, they can get a little combative, but with so many people here there is no way for everyone to agree.

[cruzin2paradise]

Quote:

Originally Posted by pollyanno

requiring tuxedos disregards the formalwear of other cultures..

 

I'm a really un-fancy person. I can and do, on rare occasions dress up but I'm still going to be wearing pants.. and there's not going to be any sequins. I'll be wearing luxury fibers and I'll be feeling very fancy and formal, I will have even put a good bit of time into trying to tame my hair, although it's not likely to be evident .. humidity hates me.. but people in floor length sparkly dresses will probably not think I'm as fancy as I feel. I don't sparkle. ever. my personality now.. that sparkles. talk to me. you'll see.

 

but if I need to be excluded from formal night.. that's OK. I will be semi-formal. with the personal choice format they could quite easily require absolutely formal in traditional dining.. traditional people probably are big on tradition.. and formal is traditional. and there's 2 PC dining rooms on the big ships, they could also make one absolutey formal that night and the other one semi-formal and anybody who can't be bothered to get dressed more than usual can do the buffet that night. they could have a fancier than normal buffet that night too and everybody would be happy, I bet.

 

but.. to a lot of people.. men people, formalwear is not a tuxedo. you can exclude me as fancy as I get and I won't cry as long as I still get the opportunity to enjoy being way fancier than ever even if it's not as fancy as you.. and as long as I get fancy dinner for dressing up! but you don't want to exclude people in their cultural fancy dress from formal night.. penalize me because I won't wear sequins.. or a dress.. that's my choice and I'll live with the consequences but don't exclude the people in their cultural fanciest..

 

anno

 

I would respectfully disagree. If you don't want to dress formally as defined by Princess (EVENING GOWNS FOR WOMEN, TUXEDO OR DARK SUIT FOR MEN), then consider other options. NCL has cruises with NO formal nights. You know these recommendations prior to boarding the ship, why should there be any questions about what to wear on FORMAL EVENING other than the color of the GOWN.

 

Rob

 

Rob - instead of "banishing" Pollyanno to NCL, maybe, if you would prefer the extreme formalness (is that a word?), you should check Seabourne cruises . . .

 

I think that there are enough options on these cruises for everyone. For the person who said their vacation would be ruined because of the guy in the shorts and tank top with a beer in the show, come on, give me a break. I'm a female and would rather have a beer than a "cordial" -- that's my right and I'm not going to be bothered by the person drinking their "cordial" (with their pinky out - just kidding :) ). I too dress up for work and on vacation, I will kick back and relax. I won't be showing up on formal night because I don't feel like dressing up. On my last cruise I wore very dressy slacks and a "formal" type top -- it was fine and my tablemates didn't puke AND they came back the next night so I guess I didn't ruin their cruise.

 

Enough is enough with these threads. I tpyically don't respond because it's not worth it, but I get so frustrated when my fellow posters (and we're all here for the same reason) have to tell someone they should sail a different line - that's not fair.

 

We are all entitled to our opinions and if something is this near and dear to your heart and someone who might not comply the way you do bothers you this much - why don't you make the choices to go elsewhere. There are so many lines that cater to the crowds who prefer to be really formal with no kids, etc. Loosen up and enjoy your vacation - is it good for your health to get pissy about who others dress??? Nope.

 

Enjoy! (Or at least make a good attempt!)

[mee]

I agree that many people enjoy dressing formally and should have the right to enjoy the atmosphere created. Having said that, DH does not enjoy formal dress so the formal nights create some sore points in our vacation. I believe that some of the people that do dress formally do so under duress. I like the idea of having some areas designated as formal - probably the traditional dining room and one of the anytime. Us more casual people (slacks and shirt, skirt and blouse - never shorts in a dining room in the evening) would creep through the halls to the other anytime or the buffet (as we do now). Perhaps some of the other public areas (bars and lounges) could also be identified as formal or not on these nights. Each us us pays for an experience when we buy our cruise and I believe the ships are getting large enough that we can all experience what we enjoy without ruining the experience of others. Call me an optimist.:)

[khfadpi]

We ate in Sterling's the 2nd formal night 2 weeks ago on the CB. You would not believe how many people were in there in just polo shirts and khakis ( men) and capri sets (women). The maitre'd just let them come on in. We were the only ones in there for a while with the "required" attire on. It didn't bother us, but my husband and son said they would have just worn casual stuff if they had known it didn't matter in there....:rolleyes:

I know what you mean about people not dressing up when they travel on airlines. Being raised as a "proper Southern young lady", my mom still dresses up when she goes shopping, to the grocery store, or doctor. I do wear nicer clothes when I go out too, I guess from being "trained" by her. :p

[sjbdtz]

I am very apprehensive about starting a thread on this subject, but I was tired of reading about the Crown list.

Before I go into it, I should tell you that my wife and I like formal night, it provides us a rare opportunity to dress formal, and it just seems so cool to be part of this tradition.

 

Anyway, I thought of a possible solution that I think would satisfy both sides of the formal night dillema. It would require compromises from both sides of the argument, which is only fair.

My plan would do away with formal night in the regular dining rooms. Instead, the specialty restaurants (extra cost) would have a formal wear requirement every night. And, I would make the formal requirement in these specialty restaurants "black tie" (tuxedo required). This would eliminate some strange things I have seen in the dining room on formal nights trying to pass as a suit.

 

People who don't want to bother with formal wear, will not be bannished to the buffet, and people like me, can still have their formal night out.

 

True, us formals will have to pay extra for that experience, but most people try these specialty cruises at least once on a cruise.

 

Non-formal types will miss out on the specialty restaurants - like I said each side has to compromise.

 

Since formal wear will only be required in these restaurants, the shows, bars, etc. will always be casual.

 

Since the specialty restaurants will be formal every night, there will be plenty of opportunities for everybody to dress up. Each of us will be able to choose which nights are formal.

 

The only problem with this idea, as far as I can see is that I don't think Princess would like it. I don't think they would like the idea of restrictions on who would go to a restaurant where they charge extra for.

 

Anyway there it is, I don't recall ever seeing this suggestion here before, but with so many threads of formal wear, who could ever find it in a search?

 

I hope this doesn't start the age old argument again. I was just trying to think of some way to appease both sides.

 

What an obscene suggestion.

 

We love to eat well, and would dine in the surcharge restaurants every night. But we have to dress up for work, and look forward to vacation as a time when we can be relaxed.

 

Here's a better suggestion:

 

- The main dining rooms & the specialty restaurants will be casual, eliminating the formal night entirely

 

- The buffet will be formal, black-tie required.

 

Enjoy!

[sjbdtz]

I am sorry, but this is a hot button for me. I agree with Largin (for a change). People already know the rules. If you don't want to dress formal 2 nights on a 7 or 10 day cruise you have options including NCL.

 

I also have problems with people who think that they only have to dress formal for dinner. The Patter says "evening attire" not dinner attire. It is the evening "atmosphere" that makes formal nights special. The evening is ruined when we walk into the princess theatre after traditional late dinner, order an after dinner cordial and have some idiot in jeans shorts and a tank top sit down in front of us with his Miller Light beer can.

 

And then go to the casino and have to stand next to the same idiot at the craps table.

 

 

 

FORMAL NIGHT IS FORMAL NIGHT. If they don't want to participate, send them to STEARAGE.

 

JMHO

 

Rob

 

Wow... I used to think "I" was a snob....living in the trendy area of the city, driving the $80,000 car, etc.

 

But if you were truly formal, you'd be playing Baccarat...not craps.

 

As for saying that NCL is an option for those who dislike formal....well guess what? Princess is also an option! :)

 

Plus, NCL doesn't go to all of the same destinations, or we'd stay with them...

[cruzin2paradise]

The buffet will be formal, black-tie required.

:eek:

 

 

LOL! :D :p

[sjbdtz]

Excelent point bjboothman. I guess this is where I am in the minority big time. The patter says "suggested evening attire". It does not say "only if you go to traditional dining room" or "except if you go to horizon court or pizzaria". I have always interpreted this as the "entire evening" and in " all public areas of the ship".

 

I am sure I will get flamed for that interpretation. LOL

 

Rob

 

 

Strangely, I wouldn't flame you for thinking that it applied to the entire evening. I'm just baffled by your lack of understanding the word "suggested".

[sjbdtz]

If only this whole topic didn't have socioeconomic connotations, it would be so much easier. If everyone on the ship had the same amount of money, the same fashion sense, was the same size, the same age, and completely like-minded, we wouldn't have to worry our pretty little heads, would we? Until that happens (and heaven forbid it ever does), then you are going to see and hear things that you don't agree with, don't approve of, that make you see red or make you want to laugh... that's just the way it is. If you can't handle the differences in your fellow travelers, fellow human beings for that matter, maybe it's time to pack up the tuxedo in moth balls and stay at home! I still can't get over the number of people who judge others based on how they dress... it boggles my mind.

 

 

THANK YOU, THANK YOU, THANK YOU.

 

I was starting to wonder what kind of surreal world I'd encountered where everyone aspired to looking like a penguin, yet calling their apparel monkey-suits.... :rolleyes:

 

Should I get offended at every Honda I see driving on the same road as my Audi?

 

Should I belittle & relegate to the cheap seats, everyone who cannot afford to live in my neighbourhood?

 

The answer, for those unsure...is NO.

 

Live and let live.

[sjbdtz]

You know the suggestions before you go. I did not appreciate the lack of code on NCL. People came to dinner in Jerans and t shirts. That is just so wrong. Even on land you go to a nice restaurant you put on a nice shirt and nice pair of pants

 

On formal nights Im okay with folks just wearing a suit. A tux looks cool. In fact i just bought on and have taken it on my honeymoon cruise.....different fron the one I wore at the wedding

 

i think a sport jacket is okay on the 4-5 day cruise formal nights

 

 

Age may have something to do with it, too.

 

It appears you were cruising already before I was born.

 

If I go to a nice restaurant, which I do fairly frequently, I dress however I feel like dressing. If it's 32 degrees Celcius outside, I might wear shorts. If I have bad hair, I might wear a ballcap.

 

If I'm paying $300 for 2 people to eat, I want to feel comfortable.

 

 

It's important to note that these formal nights are not dress codes, they're SUGGESTED formal nights...nights when you can expect not to be the only person dressed up.

 

They are not dictates that you MUST dress up.

 

What I've determined through reading this thread is that although I was initially planning on taking my dark suit on my first Princess cruise, I now will NOT, and will dress in resort casual....because to do otherwise would conform to this elitest mindset which is old-fashioned, outdated, and small minded.

[sjbdtz]

(it amazes me that people do not understand that flip-flops would be of no use in an emergency landing or evacuation).

 

 

Just curious....would patent leather pumps be a better choice? :rolleyes:

 

In an evacuation, you could be barefoot...at least you're alive.

[Pam in CA]

I'm currently cruising on the Sea Princess and interestingly, the passengers dressed very formally with women in formal gowns and at least 90% of the men and young boys in tuxes on formal night, and on smart casual nights, almost all of the women are dressing very nicely for the other nights with lots of glitter. Almost no one is dressed "casually." I'm feeling decidedly too casual with my silk shirts and black pants compared to everyone else in the dining room.

 

Oh... and the passenger ratio is 85% U.K. and only 10% Americans. Makes you wonder.

[Bubble-Ont.]

At risk of having this thread continue on......

I think a lot depends on what people in their own mind and circumstances consider formal. On my first cruise 2 years ago, because I had no formal clothes, purshased a somewhat formal dress at a price higher than my finances could really afford. I wore that dress to "formal" nite and my outfit did not compare by any means to a lot of those present. I did this because I wanted to sort of fit in. That outfit has hung in my closet ever since , probably never to come out again until I get to take another cruise. I look at it as if I burned good money but did that because I wanted to experience all parts of cruise life and see the pretty dresses of those on that nite and maybe envy a little. So please don't critisize those who do the best they can to fit into this "culture"

[rob.potter]

Is there anyway I can DELETE all my post here :D

 

I am really NOT a snob.

 

Rob

[bdjam]

I am really NOT a snob.

 

Rob

No you’re not. I don’t understand the contention that having social manners – or expecting people to be socially mannered – means one is a snob. That’s what I expect of others and if that means I’m a snob, so be it.

[lkmamom]

Very well said Brian, guess I'm a snob too;)

Linda

[LARGIN]

me too

[Host CJSKIDS]

Just curious....would patent leather pumps be a better choice? :rolleyes:

 

In an evacuation, you could be barefoot...at least you're alive.

 

Isn't that the truth. Guess what I threw on my feet as I was running from our cabin on the Star...you guessed it flip flops!! They were out and the quickest thing to slide on so that's what I wore. If I didn't and was barefoot, then that would have worked for me as well.

[spongerob]

It's important to note that these formal nights are not dress codes, they're SUGGESTED formal nights...

Aaah, the old "suggested" chestnut. Like most words in English, meaning is contextual as well as literal, and there can be more than one literal meaning. The language used is the quiet, understated language for which our British cousins are well known.

 

For example, if someone known as 'Vinny the Nose' "suggested" that you remove your hands from his lapel, you would probably understand that Vincent is being quite polite while telling you exactly what he wished you to do. Of course, you don't have to take the suggestion, but knowing Vinny, I suggest you do. :)

 

I went to one of those $$$$ restaurants last week when temps were in excess of 32 degC. The couple in front of us, dressed comfortably, (he, shorts and tank top, she shorts and halter) were not seated, while my appropriately dressed wife and I were greeted warmly.

 

Make me a snob, too, I guess.

[Basfreeman]

Is there anyway I can DELETE all my post here :D

 

I am really NOT a snob.

 

Rob

 

Hang in there--I totally agree with you. In my experience, most people follow pretty closely the dress code in the dining room. On my last Rhapsody cruise, I noticed a lot of the ladies were dressed in near-formal attire even on casual nights. However, there is all manner of dress encountered in the other public areas of the ship during the remainder of formal evenings. Personally, I don't think that shorts and t-shirts are appropriate in the public areas after 6PM, regardless of the evening's dress code.

 

Also, I am noticing a move on some cruises to eliminate the "informal" nights. However, I still wear a Jacket and Tie to dinner on those nights that I believe would in the past have been classified as such-a personal preference.

[sjbdtz]

I went to one of those $$$$ restaurants last week when temps were in excess of 32 degC. The couple in front of us, dressed comfortably, (he, shorts and tank top, she shorts and halter) were not seated, while my appropriately dressed wife and I were greeted warmly.

 

Make me a snob, too, I guess.

 

I probably get away with things because I'm a regular at this restaurant, and go there socially as well as for business.

 

I did walk away from one restaurant, when they "suggested" I remove my hat before allowing me inside. :rolleyes:

 

That said, my TA has repeatedly assured me that on Princess, the Formal Night attire is a "guideline", otherwise they could just completely shut down the buffet that night, since everyone who wanted food would have to dress up.

 

That isn't the case, and they provide alternate venues specifically described as being available for those who don't wish the formality.

 

I come from a British household, and have gone through the rigors of Catholic schools where prim & proper are de rigeur.

 

We also distinguish between "suggested" and "recommended". Neither means "required", but one provides an option, and the other a direction.

 

 

I'm new to the Princess boards, having only cruised NCL previously (4 times), but with a 22 day Princess cruise booked for next year.

 

and I'm not a snob....despite all appearances to the contrary! :cool: