How did my minor child get drunk on Ruby?

[Pam in CA]

So someone will lose there job on the ship after the investigation' date=' maybe a couple (the server and teen person) hope your son has some serious consequences too.

I have a 16 and 19 year old and both know there would be very severe consequences for behavior like that - I would blame no one but my kid/son who has been taught that you make the choice to do something and you face the consequences that come with that choice - 'you can take a horse to water but you cannot make it drink'.

Tough love but life is tough!!![/quote']I agree. Sixteen (almost 17) means they're responsible for their actions and should accept the consequences. You can get married in some states at 16, and at almost 17, he could be graduating high school, going to college in the Fall and be on his own. Even if you are immature for your age, you're still responsible for your actions.

Wow. I think the parent is reacting just fine. Her son is underage and someone gave the booze to him.

He's old enough to know better, and probably did know better. Life is about choices, even ones made at (almost) 17. Even though he's not at legal drinking age, he's still old enough to know what he was doing was wrong.

Edited January 3, 2014 by Pam in CA

[OCruisers]

EVERY family holiday cruise - and Christmas especially - half the teens on the ship are playing games trying to get their hands - and mouths - on alcohol.

Many succeed.

Some steal drinks from lounge tables when the owners are away dancing.

===============================================

REPLY ....

 

According to our younger daughter (now 36) who took many Christmas/New Year's cruises when in her preteen/teens, an easy way to do it was to steal someone's drink when they were away from the table dancing.

 

Even easier was getting champagne at the captain's party or anytime free champagne or whatever else alcoholic was being passed out because many people would only take a sip and abandon their glasses.

 

If they want it, they'll find a clever way to get it.

Hard to blame this on Princess.

 

LuLu

~~~~

[sherryf]

Wow. I think the parent is reacting just fine. Her son is underage and someone gave the booze to him.

 

It's not as if someone just walked up to him and randomly handed him a martini. He sought it out and took it, and chose to drink it. Nobody forced it on him.

[Donder1]

Having read all of these posts, I suspect, like others here, that we don't know all of the facts and likely won't. That said, if I was a crew member and saw a teen drunk and not with parents or legal guardians, I would have him brought immediately to the medical clinic by security personnel and have the parents/guardians notified immediately, even if this meant a full, ship wide announcement. The liability is too great to let a teen who is drunk proceed on his own without adequate parental supervision.Falling off the ship, going into a coma, drowning in a hot tub, pool or even vomit, hurting another through violent behavior, etc. are just a few issues to consider. Let medical and security staff deal with this and charge the parents the clinic fee. If they were drunk as well, I'd have the whole lot put off the ship at the next port.

Yes, staff should receive continual training around this issue as well. And, perhaps each shift there should be a designated officer for staff to call when this happens.

[Loonbeam]

True but even then it was less likely to be a Martini and more of a screwdriver or simple drink (anyone remember a Purple Jesus -Grape kool aid and grain alcohol)

Oh I don't know about that. If the martini in question was made with vodka, that is a nice odorless, colorless, alcohol that one learns to use early on to avoid detection.

[JimmyVWine]

Grape kool aid and grain alcohol)

Or Grape "Tang" powder (the official drink of astronauts) and grain alcohol. Don't know if they even make that stuff any more. But I've "heard" about people mixing those two together.:o

[babyher]

True but even then it was less likely to be a Martini and more of a screwdriver or simple drink (anyone remember a Purple Jesus -Grape kool aid and grain alcohol)

 

 

 

 

Oh man talk about memories. We used to mix it with fruit punch back in the day. Cumberland Farms (a convenience store chain) used to sell a gallon bottle of fruit punch, grape drink, orange drink, etc) for like 59 cents back then and a bottle of grain was pretty cheap .

[Host CJSKIDS]

Princess is blameless but your son is not. He stole and drank, what did Princess do wrong, nothing. Why would they know to do anything since he was obviously at a bar acting like an adult. Should princess walk everyone who drinks back to their cabin? It's so easy to throw the blame or a portion to someone else.

 

Princess isn't blameless here. They served underage kids alcohol according to the poster's son by allowing the one boy to use his father's card.

 

I personally have seen an underage girl served alcohol on a Princess cruise. There was also a poster on cruise critic who reviewed her sailing about a 1 1/2 year ago as well and boasted about drinking on the ship and hanging out with one of the bartenders. I believe they even kept in contact with them after her sailing.

 

Drinking goes on all the time on the cruise lines. Sometimes the kids sneak on alcohol, sometimes they drink the liquor their parents have in their cabins, sometimes they drink on board, sometimes their parents buy them drinks.

 

On one of my last spring break cruises, my husband and I got out of the aft elevators to a group of teenagers that were out of it. A few of the kids were high as a kite and quite a few were drunk.

 

I'm surprised that Princess didn't call in security under the circumstances or that the parents and the kids were not called down by someone higher up after the fact to have a discussion. With a sold out holiday sailing with floods going on and so many people, guess there was just too much going on.

 

My youngest is a senior in college so this isn't something I have to deal with. But I do think it's a good thing that the poster put this on cruise critic for others to see. It may just gives a heads up to parents that are brining their teens on board and thinking that they can't get into trouble to realize that things go on all the time that they have no idea about. Luckily for the OP, nothing tragic happened. It's an opportunity for a discussion with their child and a chance to let them know that their actions can have some serious repercussions.

[Host CJSKIDS]

True but even then it was less likely to be a Martini and more of a screwdriver or simple drink (anyone remember a Purple Jesus -Grape kool aid and grain alcohol)

 

Oh man, my first week in college down in Virginia, i tried grape kool aid and grain alcohol at a party. (Drinking age was 18 back then.) Coming from LI, grain alcohol wasn't something I had tried before. Let's just say that the next day was not a good one for me!

[MMDown Under]

I was on the December 26-30 sailing and signed my son up for the teen club. I believed that he was safe on that ship in terms of drinking alcohol. I was wrong. I got the call from the teen club (I wasn't in my cabin - they left a message). They said my son was drunk, and they told him to leave. They wanted me to come up to talk to them.

 

Aside from the issue I have with my son for his own behavior is this:

How in the hell did a minor get served? He told me another teen (who I confirmed did also get kicked out) got a hold of his dad's card and ordered martinis!

 

Secondly, and this is a big one - why would they just tell a drunk teen to leave? What if he had gone overboard or who knows what?! When I arrived, no one could tell me where he was - only that he was kicked out.

I am very disappointed in the way this was handled.

 

I can understand how worried you must have been to be advised that your son had been kicked out of the teen club because he was drunk, and you didn't know where he was. Your concerns were real, as a man went overboard recently off a cruise ship east of Brisbane (no reasons given).

 

Thank you for raising this matter on CC to alert other parents.

 

You did the right thing by talking with management, who I hope will do the right thing by improving their policies on handling teenagers in the Teen Club.

[Mom33]

I was on the December 26-30 sailing and signed my son up for the teen club. I believed that he was safe on that ship in terms of drinking alcohol. I was wrong. I got the call from the teen club (I wasn't in my cabin - they left a message). They said my son was drunk, and they told him to leave. They wanted me to come up to talk to them.

 

Aside from the issue I have with my son for his own behavior is this:

 

How in the hell did a minor get served? He told me another teen (who I confirmed did also get kicked out) got a hold of his dad's card and ordered martinis!

 

Secondly, and this is a big one - why would they just tell a drunk teen to leave? What if he had gone overboard or who knows what?! When I arrived, no one could tell me where he was - only that he was kicked out.

 

I am very disappointed in the way this was handled.

 

Your son found a way to drink illegally on a cruise ship. Teens are very resourceful when they want to do the things they are not allowed to do. They fail to see the consequences of their actions and think rules are meant for other people. No matter what you say to your teen, they will make mistakes.

The parent who remembers their teen years and the actions of teens around them, can effectively stay one step ahead of your teen. You can easily see what is going to happen with your child if your eyes are wide open. Take nothing for granted. If your child wants to get over on you, they will unless they have to face responsibility for their actions from a very early age. If a parent constantly blames everybody else's kids for their own child's behavior, the child quickly sees how easy it is to shift the problem away from them. They will then continue to use this tool into adulthood.

 

Your son drank. He is responsible for his own actions. Your sole concentration should be on him and no one else.

[geoherb]

I disagree. The children should have to face the consequences of their actions, but so should whoever served them the alcoholic drinks and the staff in the teen club that forced the kids to leave unchaperoned.

 

When I was at the champagne waterfall on the Ruby, one of our tablemates got carded. She was around 25 years old. She said she always kept her drivers license with her on cruises when she wanted a drink.

[CintiCruzer]

My Two cents worth

Sounds like the Crew did what they were supposed to do - they called your room... you did not answer, so whose fault is that??

They stopped serving the "underage" person adult beverages, so at some point they realized something was wrong - they kicked him out of the bar.. The crew did what they deemed appropriate...

 

The real issue here is parental control ( or lack thereof ) - too many times on ships, "children" (if you can call a almost 17 year old a child) are left to fend for themselves and expect the crew to be a babysitter - that is the parents job, not the bartender in a bar!!! If this 16 year old (almost 17) is pulling this stunt on the ship, how many times had he hit the liquor cabinet at home??

 

Your "Kid" out having a few drinks, sounds to be the least of your problems - you're lucky he wasn't hooking up with some young lady someplace, or maybe that was the plan... Learn to control your kid, so adults on the ship can enjoy their vacation away their own...

[Wehwalt]

I disagree. The children should have to face the consequences of their actions, but so should whoever served them the alcoholic drinks and the staff in the teen club that forced the kids to leave unchaperoned.

 

When I was at the champagne waterfall on the Ruby, one of our tablemates got carded. She was around 25 years old. She said she always kept her drivers license with her on cruises when she wanted a drink.

 

Unless the crew didn't do what they were supposed to do, I see no reason for discipline. These two boys were good liars and deceivers.

 

Unchaperoned? Now that's a word I haven't heard in quite some time. Perhaps the boys should make honest men of each other.

[caribill]

Indeed. On the other thread the OP stated she was sailing with Royal Caribbean, not Princess.

 

That certainly doesn't add up.

 

The posts on the RCCL thread were in May.

 

I suspect the OP cancelled that cruise to be on one of the new Princess short cruises (often called a "booze cruise").

[Colo Cruiser]

The posts on the RCCL thread were in May.

 

I suspect the OP cancelled that cruise to be on one of the new Princess short cruises (often called a "booze cruise").

 

In one of the old posts the OP says their son is 17, that was in May 2013, the OP said in this thread that their son won't be 17 for 6 more weeks. :confused:

[caribill]

As may or may not be the case here, as an observation, I will say if the cruiseline is not clearly marking minor's cards as being minor's....they are culpable.

 

Princess does indicate on cruise cards if the person is an adult or not. It is not obvious to the casual observer. If you look at both your card and your sun's card, you will see a minor difference. (Not sure, it might be the A in the bottom right on an adult's card.)

 

However, it is not the cruiseline's fault if an adult card is presented by a minor who appears to be much older than 21.

[caribill]

 

Thinking about it more, escorting the teens back to cabins won't work. For liability reasons, you would need at least 2 security people in each teen's cabin. Not resource practical. If you just escort them back to the room, they can just leave.

 

They do not need two security personnel in each kid's room. They need one outside of each of the two cabins involved until parents can be located.

 

This whole thing brings up a different issue as regards cruise ships, resorts, etc. They need a better way to reach parents. I want to be clear I don't have a practical solution

 

I do. Make a page (you hear them often when somebody needs to pay more money on their account). "Will Mr. or Mrs. xxxx please contact the purser's desk at extension yyyy."

 

 

 

 

see above in red

[caribill]

As for sending the drunk teen home, I agree that the drinking likely took place outside of the teen center. From my daughter's experiences, the teen center is mainly used as a meeting area from which groups of teens then move on to other parts of the ship (such as hot tubs, clubs, MUTS, etc.) By signing up with the teen center, parents are agreeing to "come and go" privileges for their teens. The teen center cannot detain them, and it would be dangerous to do so. (Most 16 year old boys would have no difficulty overpowering the young women who staff the teen center.) Instead of getting kicked out of the teen center, I think it is more likely that they were not allowed in. Or maybe they went back to the teen center, were quickly "found out" and told to leave. Parents were called. Not sure what more they should do.

 

Calling security immediately would be a first step. Security personnel would be there in two minutes or less.

[caribill]

My Two cents worth

Sounds like the Crew did what they were supposed to do - they called your room... you did not answer, so whose fault is that??

They stopped serving the "underage" person adult beverages, so at some point they realized something was wrong - they kicked him out of the bar.. The crew did what they deemed appropriate...

 

 

This did not happen at all per the OP's posts.

 

They were kicked out of the kids club (where, if really drunk, they could be a danger to the other kids), not a bar area.

[FritzG]

Did the op meet with the other teen's parents to see what story their son had? I agree that we'll never know the whole truth on this, but I find it very sad that an employee may lose the job that supports his family because of the irresponsible actions of the op's son. He was old enough to know better, and he was the one who took the drink so Princess should be blameless. I hope he has enough of a conscience to realize what harm he may have caused the server.

[Wehwalt]

Did the op meet with the other teen's parents to see what story their son had? I agree that we'll never know the whole truth on this, but I find it very sad that an employee may lose the job that supports his family because of the irresponsible actions of the op's son. He was old enough to know better, and he was the one who took the drink so Princess should be blameless. I hope he has enough of a conscience to realize what harm he may have caused the server.

 

So why is her statement that it wasn't her teen who procured the alcohol credible? That is likely coming from her kid through her. Of course, I would not dream of questioning her veracity, or her kid's. That being said ...

[Viv0828]

By this time mom and son should have discussed the incident so that mom could have posted what really happened and we all could stop speculating.

[marazad16]

By this time mom and son should have discussed the incident so that mom could have posted what really happened and we all could stop speculating.

 

Exactly. If you can't get a straight answer from your child - start there.

[wineforhealth]

In one of the old posts the OP says their son is 17, that was in May 2013, the OP said in this thread that their son won't be 17 for 6 more weeks. :confused:

 

This is what I was referring too, who knows how old the boys were. I know my kids at that age wanted nothing to do with the teen center and refused to go anywhere near there.

 

The original departure port was New Jersey, something is missing here.