would you let 3 teenage girls....

[AdoraBelle]

Overall, the world is a much safer place for tourists than it was in the 1960s. Some places have become worse, but most places are much better. In the 1960s, most crimes were not reported in any way the public would know about. Now, the much rarer crimes all go viral, so it seems like there is more crime. The statistics published by the FBI and law enforcement agencies all around the world show that violent crime is way down.

 

 

 

Thanks for this. Due to the Internet and 24/7 cable news, most people simply refuse to believe that crime is actually down.

[SECdawg]

I thought they would not let anyone under 18 off the ship without a parent or guardian. I know they would stop my son and ask where is parents were (usually right behind him).Maybe I am wrong about the age.

[The_Big_M]

According to Royal Crush not a problem at all! :p

 

[michyC]

I agree....organized tours are one thing...wandering on their own with no real purpose is asking for trouble.

 

I am presuming you are talking about becoming a victim of crime and not just being stupid. Stupid can get you killed in your own bedroom in whatever country you live in.

 

 

I take real umbrage with the term"asking for trouble". Victims of crime do not ask for trouble.

 

It is the perpetrators of crime who at fault never the victim. It is "asking for trouble" attitudes that see certain segments in our world enslaved in some form or another. It is very nearly a superstitious belief. A protective spell to keep the speaker safe, because they would never, ever "ask for trouble". Therefore the speaker is safe because they would never be so foolhardy and the victim is shamed and the perpetrator(s) forgotten in all the mess.

 

The only ones to blame for crime are the perpetrators. Never the victims.

 

Words create reality and shape beliefs.

 

Please strike the phrase "asking for trouble" from your written and verbal usage. It is very inflammatory and unhelpful to victims of crime.

 

Thank you.

[waterbug123]

Can you find someone on your roll call that is going on the same excursion and ask if they will be willing to help your daughters should something out of the norm occur.

 

 

Really? Exactly how much help do you expect perfect stranger to provide if something happens? No way in hell would I agree to help a strangers kids "if something out of the norm occurs" because it's a very open-ended request. Let's say one of the girls falls and gets hurt and needs to go to a medical facility. Would you expect that stranger to go with them? What if it meant likely missing the ship? What if they get pickpocketed? Is the stranger expected to go to the police station with them? You are potentially asking a LOT of a perfect stranger. And if you don't expect those things, then why bother asking in the first place?!

 

I thought they would not let anyone under 18 off the ship without a parent or guardian. I know they would stop my son and ask where is parents were (usually right behind him).Maybe I am wrong about the age.

 

The OP intends to get off the ship with the girls and go to the excursion meeting point with them so getting off the ship isn't the issue. However, it occurs to me that the cruise line might not allow the 16 year old to be booked on the excursion if she isn't with someone over 21, which she wouldn't be. I don't know for sure, because I've always been with my kids on excursions so don't have any firsthand experience with that.

[michyC]

I don't know about getting off the ship, but my 12 yo was able to board by herself in Noumea. That entailed taking the ship's bus through the port and getting off and going up the gangway and presenting her sea pass. Then going through security. I followed about 20 minutes later. I have little doubt that when we checked in at Sydney, she would have been allowed to check in with me and then go to immigration by herself and then security and board at embarkation. As long as I checked her in, I have no doubt she could do that and I could probably have left the port building for minutes or hours then went straight to immigration and followed. Not saying it's what I ever would do, but in Noumea, she was familiar with the ship at that point and had her teen club friends waiting. Then again, she's flown unaccompanied domestically in Oz since 6 or 7 and internationally since 9. At 14, I'd be willing to let her fly internationally unaccompanied and unescorted as allowed in the Oceania/AP region with a flight change, but not a double immigration where she had to retrieve her bags, then immigrations then customs, then airline check in, then immigration and security.

 

If you have high standards for your kids, they will generally rise to the occasion or not fall too far short.

[padlock]

I'm stunned at at the amount of posters claiming they would not 'let' a 19 and 20 year old off the ship in Jamaica. Not that long ago 'kids' that age were drafted into fighting a war on foreign land. By that age they should be responsible enough to suffer the trials of being a tourist in Jamaica. If you truly believe Jamaica is that dangerous, than you should believe that no one should get off the ship, at any age.

[mjkacmom]

And I did too, I was allowed out until the street lights went on. I rode my bike everywhere, I played on the rail road tracks, :eek: Yep, I did.

 

It is a different world today, it is not the 60's anymore. I had a wonderful childhood and I was very , very lucky. No cell phones, no way to reach me and no, my parents did not always know where I was.

 

Our 22 year old son was mugged in Curacao on his college grad cruise in full view of other passengers, fishermen, and locals. He was right across the bridge for those who know the area. We stopped for a beer, and he was mugged 50 feet from us.

 

We do not live in fear, or travel in fear. We travel smart. Many on here need to learn that. Today's young adults are usually not aware of the dangers, or think nothing will happen to them. JMHO.

The world today is statistically safer today than in the 60's, young adults are much more aware of their surroundings than back in the day. Dd20 carries mace and an alarm with her on her large urban campus. Ds18's campus diesnt allow anyone to drive to and from parties. These young adults have grown up with stranger danger, trust no one, since preschool. If you child isn't prepared to start adulting at 18, you have failed as a parent. Yes, horrible things happen, even when traveling, to young adults, children, middle aged and elderly people.

[Smyles]

Really? Exactly how much help do you expect perfect stranger to provide if something happens? No way in hell would I agree to help a strangers kids "if something out of the norm occurs" because it's a very open-ended request. Let's say one of the girls falls and gets hurt and needs to go to a medical facility. Would you expect that stranger to go with them? What if it meant likely missing the ship? What if they get pickpocketed? Is the stranger expected to go to the police station with them? You are potentially asking a LOT of a perfect stranger. And if you don't expect those things, then why bother asking in the first place?!

 

 

 

The OP intends to get off the ship with the girls and go to the excursion meeting point with them so getting off the ship isn't the issue. However, it occurs to me that the cruise line might not allow the 16 year old to be booked on the excursion if she isn't with someone over 21, which she wouldn't be. I don't know for sure, because I've always been with my kids on excursions so don't have any firsthand experience with that.

 

No I would not expect the other people to end their excursion if someone fell and got hurt. But they could flag the group leader if they notice the girls are no longer with the group. I noted in my post that they wouldn't be expected to babysit the girls.

 

Just because you have no interest in helping out others in your group doesn't mean no one else in the group would step up if a request was put out. If you have no interest then move on ignoring the request. There very well could be a family with teens of the same age planning to be on the same excursion and the teens could hang out on the excursion so the 3 girls aren't quite on their own.

[xxHadleyxx]

But the girls are not even on their own--they are with each other--if one of hte three had an issue, surely one of hte other two could report it?

 

Don't get me wrong---if I noticed a problem with young adults, or elderly, or middle aged, or whatnot (basically ANYone) on an excursion I was on, I would certainly try to help or at least notify the guide-----I just don't see that asking someone else to keep an eye out changes things much at all.

 

Personally---to me hte big red flag would be that the girls cannot be trusted to get tehmselves to/from the departure points without parental help---if they can't handle that on their own, maybe htey cnanot handle the excursion either. I don't think that is the age though. Surely most teens, certainly older ones, could manage such a simple task, even in a foriegn country, given that it will be on or near the ship, with signs in English and guides who speak English, etc)

[SteadyBetty]

You know, I gotta say this: in today's climate anywhere in the world, I would not let these girls go alone.

 

Yes, their age is "self-sufficient" and they may do okay here in the U.S. going to school, going shopping, etc. But on an island? Where strange strangers lurk looking for just the right person to either harass or worse?

 

And please, I am not saying everywhere is like this, but I would err on the side of caution. My "mom instinct" would pay up to go with them. I hardly think "saving money" is a soft cushion to send three young ladies on their own. I'd be a nervous wreck praying they make it back to the ship on time and unscathed. Or even un-harassed.

 

Or maybe I've seen too many Dateline Mysteries. But I wouldn't want to take the chance - with my children? No.

[Lyncruiser]

Wow, things are different these days. At age 20, DH and I had married, had traveled much of the west coast, had been to parts of the east coast and the Caribbean, and had left our homes and families in a small town in the Mountain West and were living in NYC for school and work (about as dangerous a place crime-wise as could be found anywhere in the late 70s).

[CruisingChick]

Would you allow 3 girls ages 16, 19 and 20 get off of the ship on their own and do shore excursions purchased either through the ship or someplace like shoretrips?? Ports are Jamaica, Cozumel, Grand Cayman and Costa Maya

 

I have not read any of the other responses, but personally only if they were purchased through the cruise line would I maybe let them do it. Of course people mature at different stages, only you would know if they are responsible enough to do these on their own.

 

Personally the only port I really don't think I'd let them do it is Jamaica.

[Havingfun2010]

Would you allow 3 girls ages 16, 19 and 20 get off of the ship on their own and do shore excursions purchased either through the ship or someplace like shoretrips?? Ports are Jamaica, Cozumel, Grand Cayman and Costa Maya

 

I'm not sure what your question is. How can you "allow" or "not allow" two adults traveling with you to do things that they want to do? They are adults. You give them reminders, instruct them, etc, but you no longer are obligated or permitted to control what they can or can't do.

 

I know of plenty of people at their age that have traveled abroad, and it is not unusual for this age to do so while in college. Those ports are as safe as any other US city. Plus, you stated they will be on a tour.

 

Your 16 year old is a different story. If you don't want her to go, than don't let her. You know what your "adult" children are like, and if you are comfortable with them baby sitting or not. Do remember, that the 16 year old can easily drink in all those areas.

[JuliaMS]

More important than their age...

 

Are they experienced travelers?

 

Do they have any situational awareness, do they notice what's going on around them see possible problems developing?

 

Do they have common sense?

 

Are they aware of possible dangers facing three young ladies alone or do they still think the world is full of puppies and rainbows?

 

Is totally dependant on the teens involved.

Edited October 6, 2016 by JuliaMS

[grandmarnnurse]

Several years ago, we cruised with our two youngest daughter's, who were 16 and 20 at the time. They wanted to kayak and snorkel--all things we two old folks do not care to do, so they went on cruise ship booked excursions, with no problems, except once in Martinique, they decided to leave the ship again after returning from excursion while we were still on ours. They went shopping and almost didn't make it back before ship was to leave!! That was the last time they ever tried that!! And I agree with a previous poster---never in Jamaica!!!

 

 

Sent from my iPad using Forums

[misty57]

I haven't taken the time to read all the responses, but I can just say.. NOPE!

Things may go well and no problems, but one never knows if something might happen. If they are my girls, I would accompany them no matter if I liked the excursion or not. In my mind it isn't worth the risk. JMHO.

[troykahack]

Two of the girls are Adults... and Adult should be able to watch out for the minor....

 

We were all 19 and 20 once.... We survived. I was in the Army at 18... learned life skills quickly...

[troykahack]

Deleted

Edited October 6, 2016 by troykahack

[Liza555]

Once again, thank you for all of the replies!

 

Just to clarify for those questioning me "allowing" a 19 and 20 year old to do anything, I guess, allow is not the correct word. It would not be that I did not allow it, it would be about mutual respect and if I asked them not to do it, and had legitimate concerns/reasons they would trust my judgement.

 

Liza555

[mintypixie]

Yeah, no problem, I would say the 2 oldest could do whatever they wished at ports. The 16 year old, well it depends on how mature you think they are. I travelled alone and with friends to various countries when I was 16 and 17, but my mother was very easy going.

 

To those who are saying no, if they are over 18 then they are adults. Think of it this way, how would you feel, as an adult, if someone dictated what tours you could go on?

Edited October 6, 2016 by mintypixie

[CruisinBarb63]

I started reading the replies and decided not to continue.

 

I went on a cruise, ALONE, when I was 19. I signed up for a group cruise thru "Single World" and went on only group excursions. There were some scary times in Nassau but I stuck with the group and was fine.

 

That being said, it was a long time ago and things have changed. I took my 16, 17 & 21 yo on a cruise and we all stayed together.

 

I'm not sure if the 16 yo could get off the ship without you. You may want to check the age limit for that as RC will not let a "minor" off the ship without a parent or guardian.

 

Enjoy your cruise and do what you think is right for your family.

[Ocean Dancer]

The world today is statistically safer today than in the 60's, young adults are much more aware of their surroundings than back in the day. Dd20 carries mace and an alarm with her on her large urban campus. Ds18's campus diesnt allow anyone to drive to and from parties. These young adults have grown up with stranger danger, trust no one, since preschool. If you child isn't prepared to start adulting at 18, you have failed as a parent. Yes, horrible things happen, even when traveling, to young adults, children, middle aged and elderly people.

 

Quote:

Originally Posted by Ocean Dancer

And I did too, I was allowed out until the street lights went on. I rode my bike everywhere, I played on the rail road tracks, :eek: Yep, I did.

 

It is a different world today, it is not the 60's anymore. I had a wonderful childhood and I was very , very lucky. No cell phones, no way to reach me and no, my parents did not always know where I was.

 

Our 22 year old son was mugged in Curacao on his college grad cruise in full view of other passengers, fishermen, and locals. He was right across the bridge for those who know the area. We stopped for a beer, and he was mugged 50 feet from us.

 

We do not live in fear, or travel in fear. We travel smart. Many on here need to learn that. Today's young adults are usually not aware of the dangers, or think nothing will happen to them. JMHO.

 

 

So, in your opinion, we have failed as parents ?

 

Why? Our 22 year old son was mugged just feet from us. Was that our fault?? Were we to hold his hand? He was a college grad and we were with him.

 

We are such horrible parents, that exact son has three degrees and a PHD. U of De, Univ of Mich, and Mich State.

 

He now works for the gov't and met the President last week.

 

How horrible that we raised him this way. In your eyes we have failed as parents. I guess you want us arrested for child abuse. Lock us up right now.

 

You are NUTS!!

Edited October 6, 2016 by Ocean Dancer

[chadbt]

Answering the OP's question: NOPE.

[Ocean Dancer]

I'm stunned at at the amount of posters claiming they would not 'let' a 19 and 20 year old off the ship in Jamaica. Not that long ago 'kids' that age were drafted into fighting a war on foreign land. By that age they should be responsible enough to suffer the trials of being a tourist in Jamaica. If you truly believe Jamaica is that dangerous, than you should believe that no one should get off the ship, at any age.

 

Those 18,19, and 20 year olds were trained and armed. My DH was one of them.