Husband never knows where he's going

[Petoonya]

Does your spouse/partner/cruise buddy know what you've booked? Get involved at all in planning?

We cruise or do a land vacation every six months or so. My husband lets it be known what he's interested in, then lets me run with it. I let him know what I've booked and what/when we're going. In ten minutes he's forgotten about it. He always enjoys our cruise vacations immensely, but he doesn't care to enter into any discussion pre-cruise or port activity planning.

He doesn't have Alzheimers, and he loves travel. But often a few days before our cruises he'll ask "where are we going again?" And we'll be headed to the airport to catch a flight for Venice while he was thinking all along we were flying an hour away to the grandkids. Then he gets all excited and plunges happily into the adventure.

 

I just booked a Sydney to Hawaii cruise today. Husband said "should be great". He's a peach, but he'll forget. If I died tonight we'd lose the deposit on two cruises ;)

 

Maybe it's just the way it is for cruise families. How does it work for you?

[deelastcre]

Does your spouse/partner/cruise buddy know what you've booked? Get involved at all in planning?

We cruise or do a land vacation every six months or so. My husband lets it be known what he's interested in, then lets me run with it. I let him know what I've booked and what/when we're going. In ten minutes he's forgotten about it. He always enjoys our cruise vacations immensely, but he doesn't care to enter into any discussion pre-cruise or port activity planning.

He doesn't have Alzheimers, and he loves travel. But often a few days before our cruises he'll ask "where are we going again?" And we'll be headed to the airport to catch a flight for Venice while he was thinking all along we were flying an hour away to the grandkids. Then he gets all excited and plunges happily into the adventure.

 

I just booked a Sydney to Hawaii cruise today. Husband said "should be great". He's a peach, but he'll forget. If I died tonight we'd lose the deposit on two cruises ;)

 

Maybe it's just the way it is for cruise families. How does it work for you?

I thought that it was just my husband. I do keep all of my bookings in a folder, but he wouldn't remember where the folder was. Yes, I would loose my deposits! We are planning a cruise to Hawaii next year and he is clueless about the details. I have everything booked except the air.

[Cruise Junky]

Mine knows where we're going from a big picture perspective, but when it comes to the details, forgetabout it. I did however notice a little cheat sheet the other day on his desk of the itinerary for our next cruise.

[gadaboutgal]

I do all the booking, planning, and let DH know when we're going so that he can pack the morning we're to leave. He's always been so supportive and appreciative of whatever travels I've planned-a great traveling companion!---by the way, his ccname is Tagsalong!

[SFCAcruiser]

Pretty much have had the same experiences as the previous posters. We discuss which cruise itinerary we like, then I make all the plans. The only question I get from that point (the day before departure) is "what time do we have to be at the airport"? Partner has no interest in this web site, but knows it exists and has joined me at Connections meetings.

 

So far this arrangement has been working well.

[Petoonya]

Love your replies everyone!

 

Had to share a story related to this. Two days into a Med cruise last year we'd ordered dinner when a very breathless, sort of scattered couple suddenly joined us. They said that they were so busy they forgot about this cruise, even forgot which cruise line their TA had booked them. They'd just flown in from San Francisco to try to catch up with the ship while we were in Portofino. They barely made it to the ship, this again two days into the cruise. They also thought they'd booked Seabourn but were OK with Oceania! He was a harried cardiac surgeon, she was his office manager.

Great company, funny people. They said it wasn't the first time they'd forgotten a cruise.

 

They REALLY didn't know where they were going.

[dogted]

Same here..... Bob goes wherever I want, but, he has always wanted to see Australia/New Zealand..so we are going in March on the Solstice, this is the one we must do while we can...I don't bore him with the details , I have the American Express # imbedded on my brain !

Ruth & Bob

Ocean Shores Wa

[Denny01]

My wife and I discuss most of the details and I do most of the booking and organizing of the trip - cruise, tours and flights. She makes inputs snd has veto power.

 

I pick out everything I'm going to take, she goes through and selects what I really need and packs if all correctly.

 

She makes sure we hav all the right docs and copies of everything and thn we head out.

 

So for us, it's kind of a combined effort

 

Den

[relic2]

I feel like we're all married to the same man. My husband takes very little interest until we are aboard the ship. He really doesn't care where we go. I make the plans with the other 2 couples with whom we cruise, and put it on my DH's calendar. I make the arrangements, through my TA for all of us and send out the info to all. I even do the online check-ins for all and book shore excursions. Then we all have a great time. I guess I enjoy the planning as much as the trip and the rest don't really want to worry about until time to go.

Margaret

[dkjretired]

It's not just the men, my wife is the same way, doesn't even know what ship we are going on next month...

[Donald Le]

Thanks a lot

[rwr235]

I do all the planning for our cruises, and initially decide on an itinerary based on places my wife might have mentioned in passing that she'd "like to see someday" ! I have been fortunate to have travelled extensively in my childhood, and throughout my life...so it's always been a running joke over the last couple of decades between my wife, her friends (and our travel companions)...that she hopes one day we go someplace I haven't already been !!

 

I always get a chuckle when someone responding to threads on here, comments...."how didn't you know ?..it's posted in the cruise line rules or on the website"...my wife is one who I can assure you has never looked over any cruise line website, cruise contract, rules and regs ! She also has no idea what "Cruise Critic" is !!

 

I also do all the pre/post travel arrangements; book hotels; research and book excursions; plan restaurants or areas/highlights of a specific city to see...she has no idea what I have planned for our upcoming cruise this October.....and has no idea we are even going on a cruise next August !!

 

The only reason I even tell my wife where we're going is because she and our friends are HUGE Scrapbooking fanatics, and it's imperative that they pre-purchase appropriate "pages", embellishments etc...and scrapbooking supplies make up a portion of our luggage...for sea days !

 

My wife's only responsibility...to make sure she puts in for the vacation time from work !

 

Enjoy !

 

Woody

[tercar]

My husband is the same as most on here, he loves cruising, however has no idea how to organise anything, he never knows what clothes he is taking either...leaves it all to me... once i asked him which shoes he was travelling in and he said my best ones, so I packed his trainers.......big mistake he travelled in another pair of trainers and didnt have a pair of dress shoes at all ..........we were invited onto the captains table and as we were at sea could not even shop for any shoes lol... the day was saved by the house keeper as she found some shoes that had been left by a passenger, ha ha 1 size to small. now I am parinoid about packing the shoes first. MEN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[Suzy Smith]

Most couples seem to have one planner and one who is happy to "go with the flow".

 

When the new itineraries come out, we look through to see what takes our fancy and we both have equal input in deciding which cruise we will take, but after that all DH has to do is pack his case! I work out the pre/post cruise travel and hotels. If there are ports on the itinerary that seem more suited to an organised tour rather than doing it ourselves I do ask for his input before booking, but he is usually happy to go with whatever I suggest.

 

I enjoy the planning and anticipation, it is part of the fun; DH loves being able to just turn up, suitase in hand, knowing all the little details have been taken care of.

[uktog]

My husband is the same. He loves cruising and is very keen that as soon as his work schedules start to get made up (some 2 years ahead) he wants to have general discussions about when and where we might go. To fix his dates safely, we are early bookers and he knows we are going away and the region we are going to and the actual dates about a year to eighteen months in advance.

Now if you are to ask him

which line he will be on - 100% chance correct answer

which ship he will be on - 50% chance correct answer

what type of room he will have - 40% chance correct answer

what deck - 0% chance correct answer (so he also has no idea of the room number)

what port are we embarking at - 80% chance correct answer

what ports we are stopping at 100% chance one port will be correctly named; 75% chance two will be correctly named 0% chance all will be correctly named

 

I talk about options for ports with him in general terms and do the excursion research which I talk through with him (though usually over a glass of wine one night when we are relaxing so I suppose I impair the chances of information retention)

 

After excursions are booked I talk about them again but I would say he would not be able to name on embarkation what he is doing each day and whether they are ship or non ship trip. Even onboard I have to keep him right on what we are doing each day and when he has to be where.

 

As regards packing, he never has a list, always does his own packing the night before or morning we are departing and can pack everything correctly in under one hour. I regret I cannot match that performance, but in my defence, I take responsibility for all paperwork, general just in case medication, chargers, pc, cameras, cables, plugs, suncream etc

 

Sound familiar

[Tara Jane]

I thrive on the planning DH wouldn't be travelling if he had to do any of it.

We decide together where we are going, he packs his case the night before and I do everything else. I have travelled extensively on my own and have learnt to travel light. The last cruise we did each with just a 7kg hand luggage, makes it so much easier. Our next trip is a 6 week European extravaganza of which we are doing 12 night on the solstice in the med.

[esther e]

Do we have clones here??? With my husband, although it's not Alzheimer's, his memory is fading. I also would lose all deposits. If I were to die, he would have no clue as to which meds to take. I made a list and put it with my coupons and told each neighbor and my daughter. He loves cruising but could care where the ship is going, as long as he doesn't have to fly more than 2 hours. I tell him he has selective memory and I use it to my advantage.

[deise17311]

Mine just shows up! I do all the planning which is fine with me...in the Rome airport I was "fired" as the travel agent because we had connecting flights (saved $600)...was quickly "re-hired" after he realized how much work it is to get price drops, great cabins, upgrades etc...

[KeywestK]

I enjoy the planning for our vacations (land and cruise) as much as the trip themselves. DH, while he enjoys the vacations, has little interest in the planning. We always decide together where we will go, what we will do, etc., then he just kinda blanks out and leaves it all to me to organize. He does know where all the travel folders are with the confirmations, etc., so if I died tomorrow, he'd be able to get all the deposits back...;)

[arewethereyet]

In my case, it's not a lack of interest. DW plans almost all of our travel vacations, and I trust her entirely. Basically, we decide what we want to do and I leave the details to her. She likes to do it. Occasionally I will ask a question, that, to an outsider, would make it appear that I was clueless about where we are going. But, that's not the case.

 

OTOH, I did all the planning, ticket purchases, etc. on a London based trip to England a few years ago. I was totally in control, and DW asked the same kind of questions I usually ask. I think it's sort of a running joke between us.

[packedandready]

WOW!!! This man has many wives:eek:.

 

Same here....I do about 99.9% of planning...the .1% he does is write the dates on his calendar for time off. And thats after calling me a number of times and asking "when am I suppose to take off?".

[smtcan]

Once we have decided where we are going - a joint decision - I run with the planning, with one exception. DH regards himself as the air travel guru, and he usually does a good job with flights and prices. Beyond that, whether it is a cruise or a land vacation he doesn't concern himself with the details. He never checks these boards, and relies on me to plan shore excursions and pre and post cruise hotels.

Sheila

[teajak]

I sure didn't know there were so many clones of a man out there,wow.Last week we were talking about a cruise and my DH had some definite input,wanted to do the canal(big surprise) wanted west to east(ok),must get a AH room(we can't function without it),must be Celebrity.I moved fast,got it all for 9/22/12, I am still in shock.

[iancal]

I do it with significant input from DW. Now that we are retired we match our bucket list with where we can get the most bang for the buck. So last year it meant a Europe cruise with a land trip toTurkey wrapped aound it. We base it on currency exchange rates and local pricing. This fall it is another Europe cruise, a land trip, and a TA.

 

The prices for Europe cruises are often half of what they were a few years ago so we are taking advantage of this. Australia is on our list but we are putting that off because of the high currency exchange rates.

 

We narrow down where we want to go and then pick a few itineries/ships. We familiarize ourselves with the priciing and book when our target price hits. After that, we wrap a land trip around it. We book inside and outside of the cancellation window-whatever is best for us.

[hawkeye3d]

:rolleyes: My DW and I agree on what cruise we want. Then I handle the cruise booking, the air and any hotels etc. DW does all the shore excursions with some interaction with me. Wonderful system works great for us. I will confess that I often forget the details of the shore excursions but since our interests coincide about 95% of the time I can just be pleasantly surprised each morning