!! I Cringe at my fellow travellers !!

[lee101224]

Apparently a Problem shared is a problem halved ??

 

We will be travelling in May on INDY , 6th Cruise , 2nd with RCCL .

 

HOWEVER

 

A family that is cruising with us ( never cruised before ) are planning on immediately taking their Auto Grats on as they 'technically don't have to pay them so why would you ?'

 

Makes me cringe , anyone ever been in this situation before , Iv had may say but it has little effect ..... Makes Me Cringe !

[hairymelon]

I will also be sailing on Indy in May - just love the ship :)

 

Anyway, that is not the point....

 

Sadly, there are lots of people who are going to guest services and having their Auto Grats removed and it has been witnessed that the staff don't even ask why....

 

Very sad and all you can do is make your point but people will do what people want to do and there is very little you can do about it :(

[ryano]

anyone ever been in this situation before

 

Yes, I went on my first cruise with "friends" and that was the first thing they did when they boarded the ship. They left the cabin attendant a whopping 20 dollars for the WEEK :mad: no one else got anything. :mad:

[Artemis908]

Is anyone on this forum from Europe? I've been in Disney groups where a lot of Europeans argued that they didn't think they should have to tip because the companys/restaurants/whatever should pay their workers enough to not need us to tip.

 

Edit: I see the OP is English - is that what your travel partners think?

Edited February 25, 2014 by Artemis908

[xxoocruiser]

Apparently a Problem shared is a problem halved ??

 

We will be travelling in May on INDY , 6th Cruise , 2nd with RCCL .

 

HOWEVER

 

A family that is cruising with us ( never cruised before ) are planning on immediately taking their Auto Grats on as they 'technically don't have to pay them so why would you ?'

 

Makes me cringe , anyone ever been in this situation before , Iv had may say but it has little effect ..... Makes Me Cringe !

 

Though it may make you cringe , if the other family is not sharing a cabin with you than it's not your place to say or do anything about the choices others make. For the record I don't believe in removing gratuities.

[John Reid]

Over the years, I have read on the CC boards that crew members sometimes know when gratuities have been withheld. If you are cringing now, consider when you are sitting at your dining room table in the evening with the deadbeats and the hard working waiter and assistant might know that half of your table will be stiffing them!

 

Have you told them of your concern?

[gerif]

I would tell them that they should advise their cabin steward and waitstaff that they will not be tipping for services rendered and thus are not entitled to any - but that's just me. In any event, they would no longer be considered friends and I'd treat them accordingly.

[JYD Hawkeye]

Yes, I went on my first cruise with "friends" and that was the first thing they did when they boarded the ship. They left the cabin attendant a whopping 20 dollars for the WEEK :mad: no one else got anything. :mad:

Unfortunately, That $20 must be reported by the steward and it too will be split up between himself and the others who normally get the tips. Doesn't do much good to tip by hand if grats are not paid thru the gratuities program first.

[Big_G]

I'm not sure that's ever happened with anyone of my family. If it did, they didn't mention it but I don't think I would really care. You just file it back in the cheap relatives file in your brain and move on. Unfortunately you can pick a lot of things in life but not your relatives. :rolleyes:

 

Sorry, just read your post again. It's a family your traveling with and not necessarily your own but the same rule applies. I wouldn't worry about.

Edited February 25, 2014 by Big_G

[island lady]

Sadly so, there are very cheap people in the world. Seasoned cruisers know how

hard the crew members work, with very little to show for it. I have always done

MTD since the program began, not just for the ease of scheduling dinner time, but

nice to know the tips were prepaid so I did not have to take a wad of small bills

on board with me.

 

When service is above par we do, as many other do also, add to that minimum

tip in cash...directly in hand. Plus we make sure to list them on the survey by

name for superior service.

 

You reap what you sow.

Edited February 25, 2014 by island lady

[time4u2go]

OP, have you tried explaining to them how the gratuities work on a cruise ship? Since this is their first cruise, perhaps they just don't understand.

[Spurschick]

My husband and I love to prepay, one less expense to worry about onboard:)

 

However my parents always take theirs off. Please don't get me wrong they still pay the tips, but they like to personally deliver the tips to those that have served them.

 

Their argument is if prepaid or automatically added they have no control over who exactly receives what. They feel if they prepay and do MTD how does their gratuities go to those that actually serve them and are not just distributed across the board and they want to be able to recognize those that have specifically served them. They did mention on one cruise in particular after the policy was changed they felt the level of service they received had diminished as staff knew they were guaranteed the gratuity rather than having to work for them.

 

Their personal thoughts are if it goes in a pool then the cost of the cruise should just be increased by the $12 pppd and included in the cost of the cruise. That way there are no issues!

 

Think of it this way, if you use a porter at a hotel do you pay the tip to the hotel or the porter! Kind of takes away the personalization of the whole thing (although I am aware you get extra tip envelopes for exceptional service!)

[Retired LEO]

Over the years, I have read on the CC boards that crew members sometimes know when gratuities have been withheld. If you are cringing now, consider when you are sitting at your dining room table in the evening with the deadbeats and the hard working waiter and assistant might know that half of your table will be stiffing them!

 

Have you told them of your concern?

 

The staff does get a list of those that remove gratuities. They should have a concern over the food being served to them.

[UKcruisefan69]

Is anyone on this forum from Europe? I've been in Disney groups where a lot of Europeans argued that they didn't think they should have to tip because the companys/restaurants/whatever should pay their workers enough to not need us to tip.

 

Edit: I see the OP is English - is that what your travel partners think?

 

Tipping isn't part of our culture as it is over in the States, however most Brit's I come across who balk at tipping take the view "well this trip is expensive enough as it is, without having to tip on top..." so sadly I don't think that people don't want to tip for moral reasons. They just don't factor it in as part of their vacation and see it more as an 'Optional Extra'.

 

Fortunately there are lots of us who DO know that tipping is expected, we're not all like that, promise!

 

I agree with xxoocruiser though, unless they're in the same Stateroom as you there's nothing you can do about it really - at the end of the day they are adults.

[LetsGetWet!]

Unfortunately, That $20 must be reported by the steward and it too will be split up between himself and the others who normally get the tips. Doesn't do much good to tip by hand if grats are not paid thru the gratuities program first.

 

My husband and I love to prepay, one less expense to worry about onboard:)

 

However my parents always take theirs off. Please don't get me wrong they still pay the tips, but they like to personally deliver the tips to those that have served them.

 

Their argument is if prepaid or automatically added they have no control over who exactly receives what.

So that brings up an interesting question, that I honestly don't know the answer to. We leave the automatic gratuities in place, and tip extra personally where we feel they deserve it. So do all those personally-delivered tips have to be reported and split up, as JYD says, or do the recipients get to keep them?

[ryano]

So do all those personally-delivered tips have to be reported and split up, as JYD says, or do the recipients get to keep them?

 

Its about 50/50 around here on what people think really happens it seems. Honestly, I dont think anyone knows!

 

I think even some staff have even reported they keep it and others have said it has to be turned in. :confused::o

Edited February 25, 2014 by ryano

[lee101224]

OP, have you tried explaining to them how the gratuities work on a cruise ship? Since this is their first cruise, perhaps they just don't understand.

 

Its a Bit of a long story , but .... They are not paying for the trip , another family member is ( big group going ) , without sounding awful or degrading , they wouldn't have naturally picked a cruise , but are happy enough to come along . BUT , i have tried the when i rome' and all that .

 

Like I said , our booking are all linked and it makes me cringe , I can't let it put a dampener on my happy place ( any cruise ship , sitting in a hot tub with a beer ! ) but it still make me Cringe !

[ChitownGus]

The staff does get a list of those that remove gratuities. They should have a concern over the food being served to them.

 

Really? That's the last thing I would expect...

[cb at sea]

Once they get onboard and see the level of service, they may very well change their minds. Too bad they said anything, as it's affected you adversely.

 

Anyway, the only thing you can control is what YOU do.

[squadron]

Apparently a Problem shared is a problem halved ??

 

We will be travelling in May on INDY , 6th Cruise , 2nd with RCCL .

 

HOWEVER

 

A family that is cruising with us ( never cruised before ) are planning on immediately taking their Auto Grats on as they 'technically don't have to pay them so why would you ?'

 

Makes me cringe , anyone ever been in this situation before , Iv had may say but it has little effect ..... Makes Me Cringe !

 

The key here is to point out that it is not fair to staff (explain reasons) if they remove tips (besides being unacceptable behavior to most people) - soften the blow by saying because they haven't cruised before they understandably didn't know. Ask do they tip in restaurants, shuttle drivers, at airports, hairdressers etc. I wouldn't just cringe but think of a way of not cruising with them.

[onyx007]

Over the years, I have read on the CC boards that crew members sometimes know when gratuities have been withheld. If you are cringing now, consider when you are sitting at your dining room table in the evening with the deadbeats and the hard working waiter and assistant might know that half of your table will be stiffing them! Have you told them of your concern?

 

First I like to point out that I'm happy to pay Auto grats on board. And for the point about Europeans. I know from own experience that on European Cruise ships they have the same thing, sometimes they just don't do it on board but add it to your cost of the cruise and you pay the Auto grats with the booking (but you pay them no matter what).

(maybe they were french :D)

 

And yes in Europe in Restaurants the grats are included in the bill and the waiters get better paid and get additional grats if they satisfy you more then usual, as it should be everywhere. Nobody should depend on grats to get by, but on cruise it is the custom all over the world...

 

You should tell them that the Auto grats is something considered as "included" in a cruise and you just pay it latter on board. You might consider not sharing your table with them :D

[ryano]

Id hate not to take the word of a D+ member as gospel but I would be really surprised if the staff gets a list of those who remove gratuities.

 

Im not doubting you. I have just not read that before on here.

[Debde]

I've removed my tips and given cash, no one treated me any differently and told me they would rather have the cash so I'm good with that and can live with myself!

The staff told me they do not get a list anyways because when I said-I hoped you did not think I was stiffing you the conversation proceeded to they do not know.

Again-no one really knows what goes on and staff has said different things to different people. do as you feel comfortable. Cash or leave it on but to tip is the right thing to do.

[LMaxwell]

Really? That's the last thing I would expect...

 

I agree. That's a very abnormal response.

 

The crew just as well may know from history that some people prefer to use cash, and may even go over the "suggested" amounts. Therefore the incentive to provide good service still exists.

 

Sometimes I feel the converse is true; that autotips somewhat discourage better service. It's "in the bag"; some (not all) staff may think it exponentially harder work to earn more on top.

 

What I think is important to relay to the OP's friends is that the gratuities in reality (set aside what should or shouldn't be, right or wrong) but in practical reality make up a large portion of the earned income of the staff. Therefore you can appeal to your friends sensibilities by telling them that while they may have the choice to remove these charges, perhaps they should simply experience the service first before coming to a final decision. After all, the best decisions are made with data and experience. I would use the same exact messaging to someone who planned to hand out $1K extra in tips. Experience the service first, then make your personal judgment call.

[sharpasice]

Over the years, I have read on the CC boards that crew members sometimes know when gratuities have been withheld. If you are cringing now, consider when you are sitting at your dining room table in the evening with the deadbeats and the hard working waiter and assistant might know that half of your table will be stiffing them!

 

Have you told them of your concern?

 

This is true. On the Oasis in October..we handed our stateroom attendant $30 up front and he said "but you have already paid gratuities". I thought that was very interesting..and nice of him to mention..so yes, they are aware. BTW he was the best stateroom attendant we have ever had!