What do you like and/or dislike about sharing a table with strangers?

[navybankerteacher]

Where did i lose you my friend?

Was it the wiping my nose at the table because i didn't want my visible runny nose to offend anyone while eating, or was it the baseball cap, or the being late on my vacation where time should belong to me and not involve anyone else's good time.

If it does in fact inhibit anyone else's food service this is a reflection of the maitre d and the head wait staff and not our being late since we are not at all related or part of the so called group. We are the obligatory group.

 

You did not lose me, you never had me to lose.

 

You have made it so very clear that you do not like eating with others, that you do not feel any inclination to defer to dining room customs, and that you feel no sense of deferring to customary interpersonal traditions - so I am happy that you will most likely cooperate with my efforts to avoid any interaction with you.

 

No worries - it's all good.

[smakcanada]

We've had lovely conversations with strangers in the dining room and buffet. But once my friend and I were assigned a table with 2 couples who had opposing political views and it was election season. They nearly came to blows and tried to talk through us: 'Tell THEM....'. We ate the last few nights in the buffet.

 

 

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Is it not possible to ask to be seated elsewhere if the group table is awkward?

 

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[smakcanada]

This post might come off as a rant to some, but a couple terms come to mind for those who are aware of this stuff: tact and social skills.

 

We'd likely be less hesitant to dine with strangers if we felt more people possessed these qualities. A couple meals with a different Joe-head-up-his-butt have unfortunately left us with not wanting to expose ourselves to the possibility anymore.

 

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Yikes! What ARE you silling to talk about? I'd be afraid if I was seated at your table.

S.

 

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[smakcanada]

I understand your discomfort, but what about the folks who fervently believe they need to bless before eating? Would you deny them that? Sorry, just cannot let this go unsaid.

It seems this discussion is all over the place. Bottom line, to each his/her own, and please don't judge or impose on others. If you simply cannot stand being with others, or if it makes you uncomfortable, eat by yourself, as others have stated. We're not in that camp, but that is our choice.

Can they just not bless their food silently?

 

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[Suelp05]

Just respect other people's ways and sit quietly for the one minute it might take.

 

 

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[Guest Nellsmom58]

To answer about blessing silently: Yes they could bless silently, but not everyone does, so maybe tolerance for one minute is needed here.

[Ashland]

I can think of quite a few reasons: because it's fun to meet others; because it's a tradition of cruising; because you might learn something new; because you might find out about a new place to visit for your bucket list (happened to me many times); because it's nice to meet someone and then see them around the ship later; because you might end up with an interesting story to share afterwards...

 

I'm not saying those reasons have to appeal to everyone, but my goodness -- there certainly are reasons.

 

Note...I did not put a question mark at the end of my post....so no need to quote me or give me reasons why you think I should sit with other's.

[cruisemom42]

These threads always seem to bring out increasingly outrageous stories of bad behavior as justifications for one side or the other's choice.

 

All I have to say is that in 45 years of cruising, I have encountered only a couple of minor "bad fits" at shared tables, and certainly no horror stories. I suspect the majority of people on a majority of cruises have felt the same....

 

It seems to me that a lot of people are overly sensitive and quick to judge as well. How can you say that the people you are dining with have "absolutely nothing" in common with you? Something has led them to book exactly the same trip, on the same ship, as you. That's a commonality you can start with.

 

Kids should learn to talk about something besides the latest video game. Cruises provide good practice for this. And if someone asks me to pray with them I will politely decline and wait until they are finished. It's not that tough.

 

I am very happy that cruise lines do give us choices. I like dining with others most nights, but sometimes there's a night or two when I'd rather dine on my own.

 

I just hope that there will continue to be people who like sharing interesting conversations while dining. I certainly would not want to eat dinners for two weeks by myself because no one is willing to share a table.

[Guest Nellsmom58]

These threads always seem to bring out increasingly outrageous stories of bad behavior as justifications for one side or the other's choice.

 

 

 

All I have to say is that in 45 years of cruising, I have encountered only a couple of minor "bad fits" at shared tables, and certainly no horror stories. I suspect the majority of people on a majority of cruises have felt the same....

 

 

 

It seems to me that a lot of people are overly sensitive and quick to judge as well. How can you say that the people you are dining with have "absolutely nothing" in common with you? Something has led them to book exactly the same trip, on the same ship, as you. That's a commonality you can start with.

 

 

 

Kids should learn to talk about something besides the latest video game. Cruises provide good practice for this. And if someone asks me to pray with them I will politely decline and wait until they are finished. It's not that tough.

 

 

 

I am very happy that cruise lines do give us choices. I like dining with others most nights, but sometimes there's a night or two when I'd rather dine on my own.

 

 

 

I just hope that there will continue to be people who like sharing interesting conversations while dining. I certainly would not want to eat dinners for two weeks by myself because no one is willing to share a table.

 

 

 

Beautiful answer [emoji4]

[the mistral wind]

Just to clarify when I say he wasn't a good listener it wasn't because I wanted to do all the talking. For most of us conversation is give and take.

 

i had a friend like that once. you had to talk real fast to get a word in edgewise and it started to become a game with me. I would try to see how many words i could manage to get into the conversation. But she was a real nice person.

[the mistral wind]

You did not lose me, you never had me to lose.

 

You have made it so very clear that you do not like eating with others, that you do not feel any inclination to defer to dining room customs, and that you feel no sense of deferring to customary interpersonal traditions - so I am happy that you will most likely cooperate with my efforts to avoid any interaction with you.

 

No worries - it's all good.

I guess i was a little crass. I have to retract some of what i have said. I am a people person but I do prefer to dine at a table for 2. I can see how tactless some of my comments were and i am quite embarrassed. :o

[the mistral wind]

Being consistently late for a reservation (such as fixed seating) is simply rude! And if you are sharing a table with others, it is even more rude! It is proper protocol to not start service at a table until everyone is present...so you are trashing the Maitre'd for using proper etiquette? That is one reason why we always use Open Sitting options and seldom make a reservation. If we do agree to dine at a certain time. we will nearly always be on time. Had to laugh at what happened on a Celebrity cruise this past year. We had a reservation to dine at Murano (this is their high cost ($50 per person) alternative restaurant. When we arrived at our reservation time there was a heated discussion going on at the door. A party of 4, who had a 7:15 reservation...showed up at 8. The Maitre'd refused to seat them..explaining that he was fully booked and seating them would cause issues for other reservations (who probably arrive on time). Those folks were turned away.. You could hear some quiet applause (from a few others waiting to get seated).

 

Hank

Ok Hank so that's just another reason to want to be seated at a table for two.

[dverzic]

I love meeting new people, yet I'm very shy, so it can sometimes be uncomfortable. Luckily my husband is more outgoing. I think you should go for it though. It's always nice to hear other people's experiences on their excursions, as well as their life stories. I've never been disappointed by being seated with strangers. By the end of the cruise, they may become your best friends!

 

 

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[CruiseGal999]

Just respect other people's ways and sit quietly for the one minute it might take.

 

 

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Exactly. Fold your own hands, bow your head and listen for 1 minute if the table mates are giving thanks for food! Blue Bloods does it every Friday night when they do the Sun. dinner scene with the whole family. What? Half the country changes the channel and doesn't watch/listen because it annoys them?

[CruiseGal999]

Note...I did not put a question mark at the end of my post....so no need to quote me or give me reasons why you think I should sit with other's.

 

Whooh .... I see you will have no problem sitting by yourself in the MDR, at the pool, at the shows, or anywhere you might go.

[slidergirl]

Can they just not bless their food silently?

 

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AMEN!! There is no reason that someone who feels they must bless their food could not do it silently to themselves. To always have to do it verbally and making a visual statement with holding hands in a public setting with strangers is just showing off. Do what you want when you are in your own home or with family. Do not make strangers feel uncomfortable with having to sit and try not stare or look out of place during your public display.

I always think of Matthew ( I can't remember if is is 5:5 of 6:5):

"“And when you pray, do not be like the hypocrites, for they love to pray standing in the synagogues and on the street corners to be seen by others. Truly I tell you, they have received their reward in full. But when you pray, go into your room, close the door and pray to your Father, who is unseen. Then your Father, who sees what is done in secret, will reward you."

 

(I am one who always says a silent "grace" before I eat).

[Ashland]

Whooh .... I see you will have no problem sitting by yourself in the MDR, at the pool, at the shows, or anywhere you might go.

Absolutely no problem .... Our vacations are the time we can get away and just enjoy time together....not that we need to explain that to you or anyone else for that matter. But thanks for your 2 cents on the subject.

[bUU]

Do not make strangers feel uncomfortable with having to sit and try not stare or look out of place during your public display.

Thanks for posting Matthew 6:5-6. I put the following challenge, though, to those who dread being asked if it would be okay ... Be ready to respond, "As a matter of fact, please allow me to lead the blessing." Tell me that you have, on such a most wonderful occasion, no words of gratitude for the meal you're about to eat, for the people who prepared it, for those who grew it and transported it to the shop, etc.? These other passengers are offering to share a ritual of their spiritual life with you, as well as the meal: You should see it as an opportunity to share with them your spiritual perspective.

 

 

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[DirtyDawg]

Thanks for posting Matthew 6:5-6. I put the following challenge, though, to those who dread being asked if it would be okay ... Be ready to respond, "As a matter of fact, please allow me to lead the blessing." Tell me that you have, on such a most wonderful occasion, no words of gratitude for the meal you're about to eat, for the people who prepared it, for those who grew it and transported it to the shop, etc.? These other passengers are offering to share a ritual of their spiritual life with you, as well as the meal: You should see it as an opportunity to share with them your spiritual perspective.

 

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That is good advice. I like to share this Grace, but only if others at the table are asking for the table to say Grace.

"Oh Lord, whose wondrous powers divine

Turned humble water into wine;

Whilst here on earth, we mortal men,

Can only turn it back again."

 

Edited July 9, 2017 by DirtyDawg

[bUU]

That is good advice. I like to share this Grace, but only if others at the table are asking for the table to say Grace...

Some folks may feel more comfortable with something a bit less irreverent. :) Here's one within which I think most folks can see value: "May we be truly thankful for the earth and sea and sky and fire from which we are about to enjoy such a bountiful harvest."

[DirtyDawg]

Some folks may feel more comfortable with something a bit less irreverent. :) Here's one within which I think most folks can see value: "May we be truly thankful for the earth and sea and sky and fire from which we are about to enjoy such a bountiful harvest."

 

That one was better than the Grace I had used previously.

"Lord, bless this food,and then bless it some more.

I know it needs blessing 'cuz I've eaten here before!"

 

(OK only a bit better ;))

( And I didn't get the chef ticked off at the whole table.)

[OzKiwiJJ]

Or there is the one my father used when he was being cheeky:

 

"Two, four, six, eight,

Bog in and don't wait!"

 

He usually only used it to make the kids laugh! :D

[navybankerteacher]

Note...I did not put a question mark at the end of my post....so no need to quote me or give me reasons why you think I should sit with other's.

 

Am I to understand that you feel you can post your opinion on a public site like this, and reserve the right to chastise someone for posting a responding opinion?

 

If I have read you correctly, I must concur with your view that you really should avoid sharing a table with others.

[NLH Arizona]

Is it not possible to ask to be seated elsewhere if the group table is awkward?

 

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Yes, it is possible.

[the mistral wind]

AMEN!! There is no reason that someone who feels they must bless their food could not do it silently to themselves. To always have to do it verbally and making a visual statement with holding hands in a public setting with strangers is just showing off. Do what you want when you are in your own home or with family. Do not make strangers feel uncomfortable with having to sit and try not stare or look out of place during your public display.

I always think of Matthew ( I can't remember if is is 5:5 of 6:5):

"“And when you pray, do not be like the hypocrites, for they love to pray standing in the synagogues and on the street corners to be seen by others. Truly I tell you, they have received their reward in full.But when you pray, go into your room, close the door and pray to your Father, who is unseen. Then your Father, who sees what is done in secret, will reward you."

 

(I am one who always says a silent "grace" before I eat).

 

I would have welcomed a group prayer . Why does this bother you so much? I do not think it should. You can just bow your head in a minute of quiet reflection if your believe differently. Different folks praise their lord in different ways and are not ashamed or distracted by giving the lord thanks.

I have experienced this by attending other churches then my own Greek Orthodox church. I once attended a non denominational church where everyone sang and openly paraised the lord.

It was different but when in Rome do as the Romans. And i am sure this is their daily way of moving on with the day in thanks why should they change their routine. It is their vacation too.:halo: