How NOT to behave in my time dining.

[legaljen1969]

On ‎11‎/‎7‎/‎2019 at 9:02 AM, rusty nut said:

Cruising used to be a classy affair, not anymore. These days, ships are filled with all kinds of classless, rude and disrespectful people.

This WORLD is filled with classless, rude and disrespectful people.  It's a self-centered world for sure.  All of these magnificent people with the world revolving around each of them. 

 

When we have ships that have capacity to hold one or two small towns, what else do we expect?  There is always going to be that one person (or more than one) that just believes the whole ship is to bow to them.

[SRF]

Again, if the staff does not enforce the rules due to worrying about bad marks, then start giving them bad marks for not enforcing the rules.

[davekathy]

2 hours ago, SRF said:

Again, if the staff does not enforce the rules due to worrying about bad marks, then start giving them bad marks for not enforcing the rules.

I definitively would have if we experienced what the  OP did.  

[Ex-Airbalancer]

“turned out that the table close to the window was useless because it was always pitch black by the time we got seated, ”

thanks for the laugh 😂

[QueenofKrakatoa]

5 hours ago, SRF said:

Again, if the staff does not enforce the rules due to worrying about bad marks, then start giving them bad marks for not enforcing the rules.

Okay, except all that does is punish the grunt, who has ZERO to do with policy making. Their manager will tell them to placate the customer, because "tHe CuStOmEr iS aLwAyS RiGhT" and then they'll follow their managers directions. Then the customer who didn't get their way should write a bad review of the employee, so they get in trouble for following directions? No. Take up your complaints with management or use your wallet, but don't punish the guy trying to get by. 

 

[Doug S]

1 hour ago, QueenofKrakatoa said:

Okay, except all that does is punish the grunt, who has ZERO to do with policy making. Their manager will tell them to placate the customer, because "tHe CuStOmEr iS aLwAyS RiGhT" and then they'll follow their managers directions. Then the customer who didn't get their way should write a bad review of the employee, so they get in trouble for following directions? No. Take up your complaints with management or use your wallet, but don't punish the guy trying to get by. 

 

so say complimentary things about the servers and make it very clear that management dropped the ball.

[ReneeFLL]

On 11/4/2019 at 9:19 AM, Scottee25 said:

......... I still recall all the things I did on my first cruise that would get me flamed here, such as wearing my swim trunks and flip-flops to the MDR on formal night.........

You're using the excuse of you being a newbie for wearing a swimsuit and flip flops to the MDR? Did someone mention the word classless? 🙄

 

On 11/6/2019 at 2:51 AM, crazyank said:

why didn't you insist that the two ladies be removed from your reserved table?  All too often people are allowed to get away with stuff like this because nobody stands up to them.

That's another problem with our society. People are afraid to stand up for what is right and let others walk all over them. It just enforces the rude behavior.

 

On 11/6/2019 at 5:50 PM, HBE4 said:

 

Apologies are nice. A complimentary lunch/dinner would have been better, especially if it took 2 hours to serve you. 

 

I'm guessing that not only is the Queen a Pinnacle but also a regular that knows half the crew by first name which is why they pandered to her. Which is fine, if she is elderly, who knows how much longer she'll be cruising.  But it shouldn't come at the expense of everyone else in the restaurant.  I'd be okay if my 45 minute lunch dragged out to an hour.....but 2 hours is unacceptable.

Why should she be pandered to just because she's an old hag? It shouldn't make any difference if she will be cruising much longer or not.

 

Edited November 9, 2019 by ReneeFLL

[SRF]

10 hours ago, QueenofKrakatoa said:

Okay, except all that does is punish the grunt, who has ZERO to do with policy making. Their manager will tell them to placate the customer, because "tHe CuStOmEr iS aLwAyS RiGhT" and then they'll follow their managers directions. Then the customer who didn't get their way should write a bad review of the employee, so they get in trouble for following directions? No. Take up your complaints with management or use your wallet, but don't punish the guy trying to get by. 

 

 

No, if you state why.  Management will start seeing lots of complaints and low marks for not enforcing the rules.

 

If there are more low marks for NOT enforcing the rules, versus enforcing them, they will start enforcing them

 

Nothing else has seemed to work.  How many times have you complained to management?  With what results?

[Scottee25]

On 11/8/2019 at 11:59 PM, ReneeFLL said:

You're using the excuse of you being a newbie for wearing a swimsuit and flip flops to the MDR? Did someone mention the word classless? 🙄

 

 

Only you so far. But you pretty much proved my point about how many people on these boards think. You take an incident that happened almost 20 years when I was a late 20 something first time cruiser and equate it to me being classless rather that what it really was: someone who had never been on a cruise before and was unaware of the traditions and norms one is to expect while cruising. Prior to that cruise, my impression of cruises was sun and fun. I am more aware now but I am not ashamed to have been ignorant in the beginning. However, your lack of empathy speaks volumes about you. Since my first cruise I have encountered many people who were first time cruisers. Rather than ridicule and judge, I tried to help them. But let me ask you, did your food taste any different because someone like me wore swim trunks and flip-flops to the MDR on formal night? If you go through life expecting everyone to behave as you would, you will find yourself always disappointed.

[davekathy]

9 hours ago, Scottee25 said:

 

Only you so far. But you pretty much proved my point about how many people on these boards think. You take an incident that happened almost 20 years when I was a late 20 something first time cruiser and equate it to me being classless rather that what it really was: someone who had never been on a cruise before and was unaware of the traditions and norms one is to expect while cruising. Prior to that cruise, my impression of cruises was sun and fun. I am more aware now but I am not ashamed to have been ignorant in the beginning. However, your lack of empathy speaks volumes about you. Since my first cruise I have encountered many people who were first time cruisers. Rather than ridicule and judge, I tried to help them. But let me ask you, did your food taste any different because someone like me wore swim trunks and flip-flops to the MDR on formal night? If you go through life expecting everyone to behave as you would, you will find yourself always disappointed.

Lame ass excuse. The suggested dress guidelines are published in all the cruise lines literature and on line as well as their cruise dailies. We all were first time cruisers at one time.  

Edited November 11, 2019 by davekathy

[Scottee25]

13 hours ago, davekathy said:

Lame ass excuse. The suggested dress guidelines are published in all the cruise lines literature and on line as well as their cruise dailies. We all were first time cruisers at one time.  

 

The fact that you find my excuse to be "lame ass" is quite laughable. I don't know if you are Dave or Kathy but it is clear that there are two of you. Have both of you fully researched every cruise you have been on? Or would you say one party put in more effort than the other? Would you say that researching today is easier than it was 20 years ago? It's actually a rhetorical question. 20 years ago much of this information was not readily available. Regardless, in many situations, one person does the bulk of the research. Take a poll of the women on this site and ask them how many of their husbands put in as much research as they do. I am sure you will find a decent number who say their husbands only care to know what days they need to request off from work. Aside from that, they really don't put much thought into it. That was me, 20 years ago. That's still a lot of people today. I didn't research the cruise. It was something my girlfriend booked. I simply knew we were sailing out of San Juan, and that's all I knew. I didn't read the daily Compass. I was there to drink cold beverages pool side in the sun. To this day, I encounter so many people onboard that have never heard of Cruise Critic. So, you are very much like ReneeFLL where you completely lack any sense of empathy for people who do not act and behave as you. Maybe you have been googling everything since the dawn of time but not everyone is like you. I was blissfully ignorant on that cruise and I have no regrets, swim trunks and flop-flops in the MDR on formal night included.

[davekathy]

45 minutes ago, Scottee25 said:

 

The fact that you find my excuse to be "lame ass" is quite laughable. I don't know if you are Dave or Kathy but it is clear that there are two of you. Have both of you fully researched every cruise you have been on? Or would you say one party put in more effort than the other? Would you say that researching today is easier than it was 20 years ago? It's actually a rhetorical question. 20 years ago much of this information was not readily available. Regardless, in many situations, one person does the bulk of the research. Take a poll of the women on this site and ask them how many of their husbands put in as much research as they do. I am sure you will find a decent number who say their husbands only care to know what days they need to request off from work. Aside from that, they really don't put much thought into it. That was me, 20 years ago. That's still a lot of people today. I didn't research the cruise. It was something my girlfriend booked. I simply knew we were sailing out of San Juan, and that's all I knew. I didn't read the daily Compass. I was there to drink cold beverages pool side in the sun. To this day, I encounter so many people onboard that have never heard of Cruise Critic. So, you are very much like ReneeFLL where you completely lack any sense of empathy for people who do not act and behave as you. Maybe you have been googling everything since the dawn of time but not everyone is like you. I was blissfully ignorant on that cruise and I have no regrets, swim trunks and flop-flops in the MDR on formal night included.

Yes I do my homework before booking our cruises. No different than any other type of vacation we are planning or anything else we are purchasing.

You are wrong. All the info you needed to know about your cruise you wanted to book ten years ago was and always has been readily available, no matter what year we're talking about. We stated cruising in 1991, I didn't have a computer. But I did 20 years ago in 1999. Before that I went to a local TA or ordered from the cruise line and snail mailed me a specific cruise line brochure and decided what ship, sail date, cabin category, location and number, itineraries. Also read in their brochures what was included in the cruise including all the do's and don't and what is expected of the cruise passenger. Included in the brochures was the dress code for the MDR in the evenings. What was allowed and what wasn't. As I said we started cruising in 1991, 10 years before knowing about and joining CC. So no help there. No we could careless what others wear. If it's cool with the staff at the entrance to the MDR that's all that matters. My post to you had nothing to do with how you were dressed. Just don't use the lame weak ass excuse, "I didn't know. My girlfriend booked the cruise". How did your girlfriend book the cruise? She told you nothing about the cruise and what is expected of you while onboard the ship? Did she pack and dress like you? Were others dressed like you in the MDR? The only reason I'm curious is I really don't believe you didn't know anything about the cruise other than the cruise was leaving from San Juan. Wait a minute, possibly you thought the buffet was the MDR. Sorry I assumed. 🤣

Edited November 11, 2019 by davekathy

[Aquahound]

On 11/8/2019 at 8:41 AM, legaljen1969 said:

When we have ships that have capacity to hold one or two small towns, what else do we expect?  There is always going to be that one person (or more than one) that just believes the whole ship is to bow to them.

 

A rule of thumb I learned a long time ago, and it sure seems to be holding true, is that 1 out of 4 people are stupid.  On a ship with 6000 people, there will be 1500 stupid people.  The OP is very lucky if they only encountered 2. 😉

[SRF]

2 hours ago, Aquahound said:

 

A rule of thumb I learned a long time ago, and it sure seems to be holding true, is that 1 out of 4 people are stupid.  On a ship with 6000 people, there will be 1500 stupid people.  The OP is very lucky if they only encountered 2. 😉

 

You are optimistic.

 

Remember, half of all the people have an IQ of 100 or less.  18% of the people have an IQ of 85 or less.

[SRF]

2 hours ago, davekathy said:

Yes I do my homework before booking our cruises. No different than any other type of vacation we are planning or anything else we are purchasing.

 

Did you read what she said?  Her girlfriend booked the cruise.  So she did not see the brochures not read them.

 

I guess you are perfect people and have NEVER made any mistakes in life.  It must be nice, but trying to be perfect.  But from your attitude, if you ever do make a mistake you will need to take drastic measures, like bury yourself in a cave to avoid facing anyone who saw you make that mistake.

 

The rest of us make mistakes.  And some of us own up to them.  And learn from them.

[HBE4]

13 minutes ago, SRF said:

The rest of us make mistakes.  And some of us own up to them.  And learn from them.

 

I got to give it up to Scottee25, at least he admits he was young and stupid and all he cared about was going away with his girlfriend and having a few frosty beverages.  Although maybe the gf should have warned him in advanced..... at least he learned from his mistake.

 

Having said all that, upon entering the MDR in swimsuit and noticing how everyone else was dressed, I would have gone back to the room to change.  I'm actually a little surprised they let him in like that on formal night. Wasn't the dress code slightly more enforced 20 years ago?

[grapau27]

3 hours ago, davekathy said:

Yes I do my homework before booking our cruises. No different than any other type of vacation we are planning or anything else we are purchasing.

You are wrong. All the info you needed to know about your cruise you wanted to book ten years ago was and always has been readily available, no matter what year we're talking about. We stated cruising in 1991, I didn't have a computer. But I did 20 years ago in 1999. Before that I went to a local TA or ordered from the cruise line and snail mailed me a specific cruise line brochure and decided what ship, sail date, cabin category, location and number, itineraries. Also read in their brochures what was included in the cruise including all the do's and don't and what is expected of the cruise passenger. Included in the brochures was the dress code for the MDR in the evenings. What was allowed and what wasn't. As I said we started cruising in 1991, 10 years before knowing about and joining CC. So no help there. No we could careless what others wear. If it's cool with the staff at the entrance to the MDR that's all that matters. My post to you had nothing to do with how you were dressed. Just don't use the lame weak ass excuse, "I didn't know. My girlfriend booked the cruise". How did your girlfriend book the cruise? She told you nothing about the cruise and what is expected of you while onboard the ship? Did she pack and dress like you? Were others dressed like you in the MDR? The only reason I'm curious is I really don't believe you didn't know anything about the cruise other than the cruise was leaving from San Juan. Wait a minute, possibly you thought the buffet was the MDR. Sorry I assumed. 🤣

I agree with you.

I left school in 1973 and my first job was in a travel agency.

I read all the brochure's and gleaned lots of information.

Since then family members relied on me to pick hotels/flights and since I met Pauline in 1978 she has been happy for me to find holidays that we both liked.

There is always information and it is easy to find out local customs like tipping in the US or dress codes on ships or hotels.

With the internet now and brilliant forums like Cruise Critic and TripAdvisor it is very easy to learn to be seasoned cruisers even on your first cruise.

 

Edited November 11, 2019 by grapau27

[davekathy]

1 hour ago, SRF said:

 

Did you read what she said?  Her girlfriend booked the cruise.  So she did not see the brochures not read them.

 

I guess you are perfect people and have NEVER made any mistakes in life.  It must be nice, but trying to be perfect.  But from your attitude, if you ever do make a mistake you will need to take drastic measures, like bury yourself in a cave to avoid facing anyone who saw you make that mistake.

 

The rest of us make mistakes.  And some of us own up to them.  And learn from them.

The only one making a mistake here is you assuming I'm perfect and have never made a mistake. Yes I did read that his girlfriend made the reservations and I referenced that in my post.  Obviously you didn't read what I posted.  I'll let you take the well traveled lower road and re-frame making a comment on your cave comment. 🤬

Edited November 11, 2019 by davekathy

[davekathy]

32 minutes ago, HBE4 said:

 

I got to give it up to Scottee25, at least he admits he was young and stupid and all he cared about was going away with his girlfriend and having a few frosty beverages.  Although maybe the gf should have warned him in advanced..... at least he learned from his mistake.

 

Having said all that, upon entering the MDR in swimsuit and noticing how everyone else was dressed, I would have gone back to the room to change.  I'm actually a little surprised they let him in like that on formal night. Wasn't the dress code slightly more enforced 20 years ago?

A lot more than what it is today. At least on RC. The OP never said what cruise line he took his first cruise on. My assumption was RC as he posted here but that's not always the case. 

[voyager70]

59 minutes ago, SRF said:

 

You are optimistic.

 

Remember, half of all the people have an IQ of 100 or less.  18% of the people have an IQ of 85 or less.

 

Wow I never knew that.  I know my IQ and feel pretty smart now!

 

[davekathy]

30 minutes ago, grapau27 said:

I agree with you.

I left school in 1973 and my first job was in a travel agency.

I read all the brochure's and gleaned lots of information.

Since then family members relied on me to pick hotels/flights and since I met Pauline in 1978 she has been happy for me to find holidays that we both liked.

There is always information and it is easy to find out local customs like tipping in the US or dress codes on ships or hotels.

With the internet now and brilliant forums like Cruise Critic and TripAdvisor it is very easy to learn to be seasoned cruisers even on your first cruise.

 

And I'll bet you shared and still share anything to do with a new trip or trips you've done many times. Whether it's cruising or anything you are planning. If someone did all the planning for us and they offered no info except where we're heading I'd be asking a lot of questions. It's all part of the anticipation and preparing for the trip/cruise. Like they say, one persons ceiling is another persons floor. 

[grapau27]

5 minutes ago, davekathy said:

And I'll bet you shared and still share anything to do with a new trip or trips you've done many times. Whether it's cruising or anything you are planning. If someone did all the planning for us and they offered no info except where we're heading I'd be asking a lot of questions. It's all part of the anticipation and preparing for the trip/cruise. Like they say, one persons ceiling is another persons floor. 

Yes,I have always shared information I have learned.

We DS think alike.

Edited November 11, 2019 by grapau27

[davekathy]

20 minutes ago, grapau27 said:

Yes,I have always shared information I have learned.

We DS think alike.

And what everyone I know does. 

[MJSailors]

    When I first read Scottee25’s post about wearing swim trunks and flip flops to the MDR on a cruise 20 years ago, I thought he was pulling CC readers’ legs. I still do.

Even if it was his first cruise as a twenty-something not-knowing-much-about-cruises kind of guy, certainly he had been to a restaurant in his twenty-something years.

Did he ever go to a wedding or prom where appropriate dress was expected?

How did  his girlfriend walk into the MDR with him that evening ? Was she also wearing a swimsuit and flip flops? I would think nor,but you ever know !

      As someone who started cruising in the late 1980s, I am well aware of how cruising  used to be. Our first cruise on the Premier lines’Big Red Boat was by no means on  a luxury,upscale ship such as those on Cunard ships. However, men wore jacket and ties to dinner ,some wore tuxes, on formal night. Ladies were dressed in gowns or cocktail dresses. I remember I wore a black and gold lame dress with a peplum,for those of you who remember that style !

We were in our late twenties for that cruise. We seemed to know how to dress and enjoy the cruise. 

Subsequent cruises into the 1990’s also found passengers dressing for dinner.

       If Scottee25 actually did appear in the MDR dressed as he described, perhaps it was due to too many cold beverages on the pool deck. That seems the best explanation for such a choice of wardrobe.

[jagsfan]

I research thoroughly any cruise I book and always have. In fact, it could be called an obsession. 

First cruise was in 1984, and  the cruise line (Premier) hadn’t had its first sailing and didn’t even have a brochure yet!

So I bought a book on cruising and inhaled that.

We didn’t know our cabin had bunk beds and exposed pipes in the bathroom. 

We did know it had a dining room that we assumed would be the equivalent of a nice restaurant at home. 

That was a lucky assumption, because we were dressed the way we would to go out to eat, so we fit right in. Formal nights were quite dressy, but that has pretty much gone by the wayside.

 What a person has grown up with and is used to has a lot to do with how they handle things like dining out. 

 

 I have friends who don’t know the name of their ship or the itinerary. They rely on whoever made the booking to handle everything. So everything is a surprise to them! Every time. 

 

 

Edited November 11, 2019 by jagsfan