Granddaughter Freaking Out 9/11

[vicky3vicky]

Our youngest granddaughter is going on a cruise with us this November. She called us last night because she saw a program about 9/11 and now she is afraid that terrorists might take over the ship while we are on board. I have assured her that x-rays could pick up most dangerous weapons, that there will be dogs smelling for explosives, and that there are personell on board, with weapons, who could protect everyone if something like this happens. She is still scared, scared enough that she is thinking she does not want to go on the cruise now. What else can I say? Thank you. 

[ray98]

You didn't say how old she is.  I would encourage her to think rationally, it would be a life lesson that will follow her throughout adulthood.  Concede that bad things do happen in the world but you can't live daily worrying about everything.

[VentureMan_2000]

You might ask your question here:

https://boards.cruisecritic.com/forum/69-ask-a-cruise-question/

 

[bingomamma19]

18 minutes ago, vicky3vicky said:

Our youngest granddaughter is going on a cruise with us this November. She called us last night because she saw a program about 9/11 and now she is afraid that terrorists might take over the ship while we are on board. I have assured her that x-rays could pick up most dangerous weapons, that there will be dogs smelling for explosives, and that there are personell on board, with weapons, who could protect everyone if something like this happens. She is still scared, scared enough that she is thinking she does not want to go on the cruise now. What else can I say? Thank you. 

Depending on her age, explain that anywhere you go could have the same possiblities, but that there are many agencies and forces that keep us safe.

 

You can not hide from life.   We are safe...as safe as we can be.   

 

Explain how many ships are out every single day with thousands and thousands of passengers.    Just be reassuring and help her see that everyday we live our lives and we are ok.

[grandmarnnurse]

Bad things can happen to us anywhere, even just walking down the street, going to church, school, or shopping. You can’t stay inside and fear for your life, you need to live your life. We had a cruise booked for Dec. 2001, just after 9/11. We discussed whether we wanted to go ahead with it, as we had to fly to PR to catch ship, but in the end we decided we were not going to live our life in fear. We went ahead and flew to PR and cruised that ship (The Carnival Destiny, now the Sunshine) with absolutely no problems. 

Edited September 10, 2019 by grandmarnnurse

[Joseph2017China]

1 hour ago, vicky3vicky said:

Our youngest granddaughter is going on a cruise with us this November. She called us last night because she saw a program about 9/11 and now she is afraid that terrorists might take over the ship while we are on board. I have assured her that x-rays could pick up most dangerous weapons, that there will be dogs smelling for explosives, and that there are personell on board, with weapons, who could protect everyone if something like this happens. She is still scared, scared enough that she is thinking she does not want to go on the cruise now. What else can I say? Thank you. 

you might want to first discuss this with her parents, and then recommend a counselor, which many schools have them.  Just to talk out her fears.  I really doubt you can say anything.  Basically you already stretched the truth with what you said so you wouldn't be the right type of person to continue the conversation.   (There are always ways to get weapons and other stuff on board and the ship does not have an armed police force)

[GradUT]

1 hour ago, fyree39 said:

Tell her there are US CIA agents on board every ship working under cover looking for any and all terrorist threats, my like US marshals on aircraft. Tell her she'll have no idea who these people are as they are trained to blend in with the other passengers. Tell her you have heard this from reliable sources that you can't reveal.

 

Hey, sometimes you have to get creative.

No, No, No, NO!    Do not lie to your grandchild (however old she is) about anything and especially about CIA agents on board cruise ships.  There are enough misconceptions about CIA agents out there and we don't need to add to them!  (FWIW, I used to work in a field where I came in contact with CIA agents on a regular basis.  The last thing they need is people believing they are infiltrating cruise ships!) 

[sfaaa]

Why freak her out? Leave her alone and tell her not to go. 

[Warm Breezes]

Our first cruise was in Nov. 2001 and we had to fly to Orlando to go on it.  We had many of those same fears she has now back then.  We will be going on our 20th cruise next month.  We obviously did not let those fears interfere with our traveling.  IMHO I would emphasize that while her fears are real, the reality of something happening is extremely, extremely small.  It is always good to be alert and aware of our surroundings.  But letting fear rule our lives is letting evil win.

[Cushing985]

I would tell her there are literally thousands of men and women working 24/7 to make us safe...the CIA, FBI, NSA, Homeland Security and all branches of the military.  Security today is nothing like it was back in 2011.  Tell he that and then let her make her own decision.

[keywest1]

We sailed on 9/11 one year.  There was a large American flag hanging in the upper atrium and CD made mention of the anniversary.  It was a touching tribute from a crew of many nationalities.  I don't know if they do this anymore or not.

We flew into FLL the week after the airport shooting a few years ago.  That was a little unnerving, but IMO if the terrorists/shooters stop me from living my life then they have achieved their goal.  

I hope your granddaughter is able to enjoy her cruise 🙂

[Cafedumonde]

People do have different levels of tolerance when it comes to fear.  I think you have to respect it.  Maybe she actually shouldn’t go until she is ready.  We took 2 vacations right after 9/11 because we got dirt cheap flights and hotels etc.  $40 hotel rooms at Disney World.  Golden.  No fear from us.  Bring it.  But I was scared to walk upstairs in my parents house until my early 20s.  Just creeped me out.  I went upstairs of course but every time I went up there I had to take a deep breath.  Totally irrational.  Eventually I stopped feeling that way.

Edited September 10, 2019 by Cafedumonde

[vicky3vicky]

She is 17, will turn 18 on the cruise. She says she is  okay  with still going but would feel safer if boyfriend could come with us. I told her no, but if she starts to get scared, me and grandpa will hold her hand the entire time. I could feel her blush in embarrassment  at the thought over the phone. I also asked if she still wants to go and she says yes.

[2wheelin]

14 minutes ago, vicky3vicky said:

She is 17, will turn 18 on the cruise. She says she is  okay  with still going but would feel safer if boyfriend could come with us. I told her no, but if she starts to get scared, me and grandpa will hold her hand the entire time. I could feel her blush in embarrassment  at the thought over the phone. I also asked if she still wants to go and she says yes.

Aha. Has she expressed fear of things before? She’s 17 and wants boyfriend along without mom and dad. Hmmm

[Shaded Lady]

At the age of 17 I'd be more afraid of domestic terrorists shooting up my school than an event taking place on my cruise! I don't want to belittle her fear but it sounds like a bit of teenage drama to me... she's probably had at least a few 'active shooter drills' in her high school, yet she goes to school every day doesn't she?

 

As I said, I wouldn't make a big deal out of it, just let her talk it out if her concerns are real, then give her the choice to go or not go. 

[tallnthensome]

6 hours ago, VentureMan_2000 said:

You might ask your question here:

https://boards.cruisecritic.com/forum/69-ask-a-cruise-question/

 

Correct, this has nothing to do with Carnival. 

[ray98]

1 hour ago, vicky3vicky said:

She is 17, will turn 18 on the cruise.---------but would feel safer if boyfriend could come with us.

 

There is your answer.

[Joe817]

3 minutes ago, ray98 said:

 

There is your answer.

Yup. At that age sounds like she's playing on your emotions to cave and say we'll take your boyfriend along, as long as you go on the cruise with us. But I don't know your situation for sure. Just my opinion. 

[PhillyFan33579]

3 hours ago, vicky3vicky said:

She is 17, will turn 18 on the cruise. She says she is  okay  with still going but would feel safer if boyfriend could come with us. I told her no, but if she starts to get scared, me and grandpa will hold her hand the entire time. I could feel her blush in embarrassment  at the thought over the phone. I also asked if she still wants to go and she says yes.

 

Now your comments make more sense. Looks like she is doing her best to play you to get her way.  Your original comment about 9/11 and cruise ships made no sense to me, but now it makes perfect sense.  

[Organized Chaos]

4 hours ago, vicky3vicky said:

She is 17, will turn 18 on the cruise. She says she is  okay  with still going but would feel safer if boyfriend could come with us. I told her no, but if she starts to get scared, me and grandpa will hold her hand the entire time. I could feel her blush in embarrassment  at the thought over the phone. I also asked if she still wants to go and she says yes.

 

This is what I was going to say before I saw that you posted that comment: Don't follow the advice of anyone who says "tell her not to go." Acknowledge her fears, tell her everyone gets afraid at time, but that it's very important to stand up to your fears or your fears will rule over you for life. Tell her that that ship is going to have a whole lot of good, down to Earth folks who don't take kindly to evil people trying to do harm to others and will do everything in their power to stop such people if something were to occur. Tell her about the military Veterans appreciation gathering that Carnival hosts aboard every cruise. Tell her that y'all will go to that (it's open to everyone) and you will show her a theater full of people who will stand between her and a bad guy any day of the week.

 

This is what I say after learning her age and that she said she needs her boyfriend: She's playing you. As a kid in her late teens, she saw an opportunity to con her grandparents into giving her boyfriend a free cruise so that she can hang out with him and not the two of you. I think it's good you told her no, now you just need to stick to that.

[jbethel11]

14 minutes ago, Organized Chaos said:

This is what I say after learning her age and that she said she needs her boyfriend: She's playing you. As a kid in her late teens, she saw an opportunity to con her grandparents into giving her boyfriend a free cruise so that she can hang out with him and not the two of you. I think it's good you told her no, now you just need to stick to that.

How conniving!

[PhillyFan33579]

18 minutes ago, jbethel11 said:

How conniving!

 

Don’t get any ideas from this thread. 

[Saint Greg]

5 hours ago, vicky3vicky said:

She is 17, will turn 18 on the cruise. She says she is  okay  with still going but would feel safer if boyfriend could come with us. I told her no, but if she starts to get scared, me and grandpa will hold her hand the entire time. I could feel her blush in embarrassment  at the thought over the phone. I also asked if she still wants to go and she says yes.

 

[VentureMan_2000]

5 hours ago, vicky3vicky said:

She is 17, will turn 18 on the cruise. She says she is  okay  with still going but would feel safer if boyfriend could come with us.

 

Wow... !  Trying to play Grandma like a fiddle.  

[MamaFej]

Gee, Grandma, I'm scared that terrorists are going to kill you and Grandpa and me, but I sure would feel more comfortable if they had the opportunity to kill my boyfriend, too.

 

🙄