Baby Mama

[Grandma Dazzles]

1 hour ago, lyannea said:

 

Thank you for answering my question about what papers, if any, he would have to submit for the cruise.

 

It’s difficult to put yourself in someone else’s shoes, as we all know, without judgement 

 

 

 

Have a great Sunday

Lyannea

 

1 hour ago, lyannea said:

 

 

 

 

Responded earlier in this read and reiterating what I said then. 

 

OP does not know cruise line or itinerary - could conceivably require a passport; probably not. My guess is a closed loop cruise and original birth certificate would suffice.  Note original birth certificate - not all cruise lines take copies.  Cruiseline and immigration are more likely to question different names and ask for parental letter giving the mother permission to travel with the child.  This is all speculation!

 

Until further information is know, legal and/or parenting advice on a public forum isn’t going to help.

 

Have your  nephew talk to a lawyer about the cruise and the entire situation 

[Julie MacCoy]

I'm concerned that the birth certificate shows the name of the Baby Daddy.  (If the mother is Baby Mama, then the father is Baby Daddy.)  Did Baby Mama change her last name when she married her husband?  If she did, and if their last name isn't the same last name as Baby Daddy, TPTB will wonder what's going on, if there isn't a letter from Baby Daddy saying that it's okay for Baby Mama and her husband to take the boy on a cruise.  I don't know if they will be allowed to board the ship.

[lyannea]

21 minutes ago, nascarcruiser said:

I have to agree the Aunt seems to be more concerned than the child's father but maybe she has a CC account and he doesn't.  I guess if it were me I would have had custody orders drawn up at birth along with child support.  Also if the mother is unstable why hasn't something been done sooner?  To many questions.  All the child needs to be able to leave the country is a birth certificate at his age. now if the cruise line actually asked for and looks at a letter from the father saying that the mother has permission to taking is another story sometimes they do sometimes they don't ask for it.

 

Yes, I cruise a lot and love it !

 

My nephew does not 

 

and concerned that his son would be left in some country without sufficient papers 

 

I did let him know that, during embarkation, all papers will be looked at in a closed loop cruise

 

I wanted to thank everyone who helpfully answered my questions and help guide me  when I speak with my nephew later on today

 

 

there ARE a lot of questions and the only regret I now have is simply asking

 

if one of the parents of a child wants to take their child on a cruise 

And the parents are not married

 

Does the other parent have to write that he consents ?

 

THAT may have been enough to ward off the REAL critics, though I have to admit, we all run on emotion at times, including me

 

Happy  cruising to everyone!! 

[lyannea]

11 minutes ago, Grandma Dazzles said:

 

 

Responded earlier in this read and reiterating what I said then. 

 

OP does not know cruise line or itinerary - could conceivably require a passport; probably not. My guess is a closed loop cruise and original birth certificate would suffice.  Note original birth certificate - not all cruise lines take copies.  Cruiseline and immigration are more likely to question different names and ask for parental letter giving the mother permission to travel with the child.  This is all speculation!

 

Until further information is know, legal and/or parenting advice on a public forum isn’t going to help.

 

Have your  nephew talk to a lawyer about the cruise and the entire situation 

Thank you !

 

You’ve been more than helpful !

I appreciate your Time !

 

Lyannea

[lyannea]

6 minutes ago, Julie MacCoy said:

I'm concerned that the birth certificate shows the name of the Baby Daddy.  (If the mother is Baby Mama, then the father is Baby Daddy.)  Did Baby Mama change her last name when she married her husband?  If she did, and if their last name isn't the same last name as Baby Daddy, TPTB will wonder what's going on, if there isn't a letter from Baby Daddy saying that it's okay for Baby Mama and her husband to take the boy on a cruise.  I don't know if they will be allowed to board the ship.

The birth certificate shows the Baby Daddy’s name

He’ll make sure that if a letter is warranted, that it will be there.

 

Thank you !

Lyannea

[Itchy&Scratchy]

16 hours ago, dolittle said:

Maybe I am off base but it seems like you and he are looking for reasons to say NO to this trip . I hope you do not spoil the fun of a 10 year old and his new family. As Dr. Phil says sometimes you need to be the hero.

 

I agree and would like to add that sometimes aunts need to butt out of their adult nephews' lives and let them parent and deal with their families and children on their own.

[Elaine5715]

Baby Daddy can contact the cruise line once known and tell them the child does not have his permission to leave the country.  That is why you establish legal custody and who can do what under the courts. 

[lyannea]

1 minute ago, Elaine5715 said:

Baby Daddy can contact the cruise line once known and tell them the child does not have his permission to leave the country.  That is why you establish legal custody and who can do what under the courts. 

 

Thank you for your response !

 

I truly appreciate it- 

My nephew will do the right thing regarding this upcoming cruise in August

 

 

Lyannea

 

 

[lyannea]

40 minutes ago, Itchy&Scratchy said:

I agree and would like to add that sometimes aunts need to butt out of their adult nephews' lives and let them parent and deal with their families and children on their own.

 

lol, I agree on the butting out!! I would NEVER tell him what to do, trust me !

 

Though, if one of them asked me a question about cruising (because I cruise a lot) 

to include concerns about paperwork needed and THEIR concerns about their child 

I really don’t think that I could ignore them, but that’s just me.

 

Thanks for your response,

 

Lyannea

[Itchy&Scratchy]

6 minutes ago, lyannea said:

 

lol, I agree on the butting out!! I would NEVER tell him what to do, trust me !

 

Though, if one of them asked me a question about cruising (because I cruise a lot) 

to include concerns about paperwork needed and THEIR concerns about their child 

I really don’t think that I could ignore them, but that’s just me.

 

Thanks for your response,

 

Lyannea

did your nephew also asked you to call his child's mother baby mama and refer to her as unstable on a public forum? Please keep that in mind. That had nothing to do with questions about cruising.

[lyannea]

Just now, Itchy&Scratchy said:

did your nephew also asked you to call his child's mother baby mama and refer to her as unstable on a public forum? Please keep that in mind. That had nothing to do with questions about cruising.

 

Just now, Itchy&Scratchy said:

did your nephew also asked you to call his child's mother baby mama and refer to her as unstable on a public forum? Please keep that in mind. That had nothing to do with questions about cruising.

No, lol 

And I inderstand your need to ask me a question that has nothing to do with cruising

 

[Elaine5715]

51 minutes ago, lyannea said:

 

Thank you for your response !

 

I truly appreciate it- 

My nephew will do the right thing regarding this upcoming cruise in August

 

 

Lyannea

 

 

I don't necessarily agree that the "right" thing to do is give babymama carte blanche.  If he is participating fully in the child's life, it may be best the child remains with him while babymama is on a cruise.  

[lyannea]

3 minutes ago, Elaine5715 said:

I don't necessarily agree that the "right" thing to do is give babymama carte blanche.  If he is participating fully in the child's life, it may be best the child remains with him while babymama is on a cruise.  

 

In a perfect world, I agree that the best thing is to have his son stay with him as my nephew does take the primary responsibility with his son's education, schoolwork, etc

 

Realistically, I believe ( though I'm not sure) that the mother of the child may have more rights and I'm in agreement that having him ask a lawyer may clear a lot up.

 

As a cruiser and having been on these boards over the years, it's not unheard of to take a child out of school to cruise - I never have. 

 

 

I appreciate your insight,   Lyannea

 

 

[sanger727]

3 hours ago, lyannea said:

 

Yes, I cruise a lot and love it !

 

My nephew does not 

 

and concerned that his son would be left in some country without sufficient papers 

 

I did let him know that, during embarkation, all papers will be looked at in a closed loop cruise

 

I wanted to thank everyone who helpfully answered my questions and help guide me  when I speak with my nephew later on today

 

 

there ARE a lot of questions and the only regret I now have is simply asking

 

if one of the parents of a child wants to take their child on a cruise 

And the parents are not married

 

Does the other parent have to write that he consents ?

 

THAT may have been enough to ward off the REAL critics, though I have to admit, we all run on emotion at times, including me

 

Happy  cruising to everyone!! 

 

Yes, he should write a letter giving permission for her to take the child and have it notarized. The cruise line may or may not ask it but better to be safe that sorry.

[zqvol]

Missing the first week of school is irresponsible.

 

It doesn't matter what cruise line is involved. The mother needs the fathers consent to take the child out of the country.  The solution is to tell mother that if she wants permission then the cruise needs to be planned when the child is not in school, or leave the child at home.

[Elaine5715]

3 hours ago, lyannea said:

 

In a perfect world, I agree that the best thing is to have his son stay with him as my nephew does take the primary responsibility with his son's education, schoolwork, etc

 

Realistically, I believe ( though I'm not sure) that the mother of the child may have more rights and I'm in agreement that having him ask a lawyer may clear a lot up.

.

As a cruiser and having been on these boards over the years, it's not unheard of to take a child out of school to cruise - I never have. 

 

 

I appreciate your insight,   Lyannea

 

 

Depending on the state, the mother may or may not have more rights but it is better to get the legal questions settled now before a crisis.  I don't agree with taking kids out of the the first week (other than pre-k or kindergarten) because many times kids start to pal up and a late starting kid comes in as a "new kid" but the parents should agree whether it is a good idea or not.

[dkjretired]

12 hours ago, zqvol said:

Missing the first week of school is irresponsible.

 

It doesn't matter what cruise line is involved. The mother needs the fathers consent to take the child out of the country.  The solution is to tell mother that if she wants permission then the cruise needs to be planned when the child is not in school, or leave the child at home.

 

Off topic because that was not the subject discussed and I would like you to show where a law says the mother can’t take the kid out of country.

[dkjretired]

This topic has come up many times in the past and there are generally three conclusions.

1. Only the cruise line can answer your question because they follow USLaws and the laws of the countries you are visiting because they are just as important.

2. If a closed loop cruise there should be no problem with the child going with only the mother.

3. If not closed loop, there will be a huge problem without both parents permission.

[NolaKait]

My daughter is from my first marriage and has a different last name than my husband and I. We always get a notarized letter from her father prior to any international travel, but I have never been asked for it on a cruise ship. So far, I have only ever needed it flying into Jamaica and Belize.

[ldubs]

I would not downplay missing the first week of school.  I presume this is something like 5th grade.  If a new school, missing the first week would be a pretty big deal in my opinion.  Not only will the child be the new kid, he will be the new kid a week late.   If same school & friends as last year then contact should be made on how the child's catch-up lessons will be handled.   

[lyannea]

42 minutes ago, ldubs said:

I would not downplay missing the first week of school.  I presume this is something like 5th grade.  If a new school, missing the first week would be a pretty big deal in my opinion.  Not only will the child be the new kid, he will be the new kid a week late.   If same school & friends as last year then contact should be made on how the child's catch-up lessons will be handled.   

Thank you for your insight - very much appreciated 

Lyannea

[LuckyStar]

On 2/9/2019 at 6:55 PM, lyannea said:

Thank you so much.

I don’t think my nephew is happy

The mother is not a responsible adult 

and he’s worried.

I will pass this information along

Lyannea

 

Is he worried she won't come back?  If they have a contentious relationship, I'd be worried too.  Why doesn't he offer to keep the kiddo while she and hubby have a couple's getaway?  That way he gets to have his kiddo for the week, they get to be alone and he might garner points with Baby Mama. Every couple wants time alone without having to worry about their kids while they are gone.  That would work with me. 🙂 BUT some people aren't as easy to deal with.  Sorry if this doesn't help.  

[Itchy&Scratchy]

2 hours ago, LuckyStar said:

Is he worried she won't come back?  If they have a contentious relationship, I'd be worried too.  Why doesn't he offer to keep the kiddo while she and hubby have a couple's getaway?  That way he gets to have his kiddo for the week, they get to be alone and he might garner points with Baby Mama. Every couple wants time alone without having to worry about their kids while they are gone.  That would work with me. 🙂 BUT some people aren't as easy to deal with.  Sorry if this doesn't help.  

OP said that

Quote

Baby Mama announces that she’s paid for a family cruise with new husband’s family, to include my nephew’s son

The whole family, including her son. It's not a couple trip, and no,  not every couple wants to cruise without their kids.

Besides, it's for parents to decide whether this trip will benefit the child, and not for random strangers on the internet or Aunt Lyannea.

Edited February 12, 2019 by Itchy&Scratchy

[LuckyStar]

44 minutes ago, Itchy&Scratchy said:

OP said that

The whole family, including her son. It's not a couple trip, and no,  not every couple wants to cruise without their kids.

Besides, it's for parents to decide whether this trip will benefit the child, and not for random strangers on the internet or Aunt Lyannea.

And yet you feel free to comment. 

 

[lyannea]

12 hours ago, LuckyStar said:

Is he worried she won't come back?  If they have a contentious relationship, I'd be worried too.  Why doesn't he offer to keep the kiddo while she and hubby have a couple's getaway?  That way he gets to have his kiddo for the week, they get to be alone and he might garner points with Baby Mama. Every couple wants time alone without having to worry about their kids while they are gone.  That would work with me. 🙂 BUT some people aren't as easy to deal with.  Sorry if this doesn't help.  

Thank you so much for the reply

i believe my nephew would love to have his son for an extra week

 

He called me after he found out that BabyMama has paid for the cruise already.

 

As I cruise a lot, he reached to me with questions about children cruising.

 

She would definetely return as she has a job to come home to

Thanks again for your conceen

 Lyannea