Specific Tip Question

[boltnut55]

I'm almost scared to post this because I know tipping can be a very charged topic from "why are you so cheap?!" to "I'm sick and tired of tipping!"😁  However, I'll be on a cruise in about 6 weeks again, and I want to get a feel of others would do in our situation assuming it comes up again, so thanks in advance!

 

Our last cruise was 14 days, and it was our family of 3 and my elderly MIL.  We ended up eating mostly in the 2 smaller free dining rooms that were right across from each other, and there were several head waiter/assistant maitre'ds who approached us from the beginning. They had a friendly competition between the 2 dining rooms like, "Come here tomorrow night; we're nicer!" type of thing.  However, after a couple of days, if I had to be blunt, I would say that they were ingratiating themselves to us.  Yes, I know they could have also wanted to be nice and helpful especially since MIL is so cute, but I don't know as I'm kind of cynical...  They greeted us enthusiastically especially MIL, one had to change a bunch of reservations for us once we found out the show times, and another took our next evening orders during that last week because MIL and my feet were ballooning because of the salt intake, and some handed out their business cards, but there was also the "tomorrow is the last night, but I will be at the ____ restaurant instead" which I took as "in case you're handing out tips."

 

Obviously, we did the regular gratuities, and in the end, my husband was feeling like he should give them all an extra.  I was feeling more like that's their job but also feeling some obligation to give extra on top of whatever their normal was, so on the last night, we handed out envelopes, and I told them, "thank you... this is just a little something extra..." something like $10 - $20/each since we didn't have extra cash since gratuities were already paid for.  

 

What I'm trying to figure out is whether it should be considered they were doing their jobs or whether they were going out of their way for us.  What do you think?  Would you have tipped extra?  A lot more?  None?  Maybe just to those who had to do extra work?🤷🏻‍♀️

[Mum2Mercury]

It does sound like they went "above and beyond" for you.  You seem to have appreciated their attentions and help.  An extra $20 would be nice, but -- given that you've already paid your basic tips -- it isn't essential.  

[SPacificbound]

In addition of the regular gratuities we always give special bar tenders, special food servers and our cabin attendant envelopes on the day/evening before embarkation day. This works for us to recognize the service we have been given.

[momof3cruisers]

I’d probably have given the one who helped with your reservations and the special orders an extra tip and then filled out a comment card mentioning the extra care the other specific team members gave you. 
 

FYI, people on here will tell you it isn’t true, but to help with the water retention, try drinking only bottled water. I was sailing with two of my sisters. One was drinking only bottled water, the other two of us weren’t. We commented about having swollen feet. She said it was the water. Very soon after we switched we both saw a huge improvement. 

[mom says]

13 hours ago, SPacificbound said:

In addition of the regular gratuities we always give special bar tenders, special food servers and our cabin attendant envelopes on the day/evening before embarkation day. This works for us to recognize the service we have been given.

(Bolded) How did you manage that exactly? 😂

 

OP, JMO, but I also would have tipped cash to those who had helped with rearranging your reservations and pre-ordering your meals. And also would have filled out comment cards, specifically naming the helpful crew members.

[LHT28]

I ask for sodium free meals

It is  a bit of  a pain having to order your meals  a day or so ahead  but  the pain in my legs thanked me 

JMO

 

I would have tipped extra as well to those that helped  during the cruise

[sanger727]

Seating you when you come to the restaurant. Being pleasant and friendly. Taking your orders, bringing your food, and topping off you drinks is "doing their job". From what you described, they went above and beyond their job and provided excellent service. I would have tipped extra. I think what you tipped is reasonable for what they did.

[StollyBolly]

Not sure how the gratuity process works on all cruises.  We have only cruised on all inclusive for the past few years.  But we always leave an envelope for our suite attendant(s) because they work pretty hard and make sure I have ice in the fridge, etc.    we also slip $10/20 to waiters who have just done that little extra like arranged tables for a group.  The other thing we have learned is do a gratuity for the crew fund that says thank you to all those who keep the ship clean, running and make your trip special.  

[boltnut55]

Thank you, everyone, for your responses.  After thinking about it more, I think we gave $20 to the maitre'd who helped us choose our no salt options, $10 for the one who changed a bunch of our reservations (it was a 1-time thing but for a bunch of nights), and $10 for the one who greeted us enthusiastically but didn't do any special work.

LHT28 - yeah my poor legs/feet!  I'm going to pretty start w/day 1 with no/low salt options instead of waiting a week to see my poor feel bloat.  It started w/my MIL and me, but by the last couple of days, my DH and adult daughter did it too!

[George C]

We almost always tip extra for great service, I think staff deserves it . Many of these workers had a great loss of income during Covid and we didn’t.

[LHT28]

9 hours ago, boltnut55 said:

LHT28 - yeah my poor legs/feet!  I'm going to pretty start w/day 1 with no/low salt options instead of waiting a week to see my poor feel bloat.  It started w/my MIL and me, but by the last couple of days, my DH and adult daughter did it too!

Also drink  bottled water 

I was in such pain with my legs  on one cruise  until I started asking for low/no sodium items

 

[momof3cruisers]

7 hours ago, LHT28 said:

Also drink  bottled water 

I was in such pain with my legs  on one cruise  until I started asking for low/no sodium items

 

The bottled water thing is huge for me. I know they say the water has no salt etc, but I can eat whatever but if I don’t drink bottled water, I have problems.

[ceeceeDee]

Here in Australia, we do not have much of a tipping culture. However, we invariably give a small tip to our cabin stewards on day 1. They don't expect it, but really do appreciate it and we always get looked after really well. We also tip them again at the end of the cruise. We also tip waiters who give top service at the end of the cruise. These people don't earn huge money, work 12 hour days 7 days a week for 8 months at a time, yet they are always smiling, always obliging and do a great job. They deserve a couple of extra dollars.

[ldubs]

Kind of off topic, but I can't identify any cruise where we were the cabin stewards didn't do a terrific job.  Hats off to those folks!  

 

 

 

 

[George C]

On 6/4/2023 at 11:18 AM, LHT28 said:

Also drink  bottled water 

I was in such pain with my legs  on one cruise  until I started asking for low/no sodium items

 

I went to my doctor after last cruise because of swelling of my feet. 

[Gwendy]

21 hours ago, ceeceeDee said:

Here in Australia, we do not have much of a tipping culture. However, we invariably give a small tip to our cabin stewards on day 1. They don't expect it, but really do appreciate it and we always get looked after really well. We also tip them again at the end of the cruise. We also tip waiters who give top service at the end of the cruise. These people don't earn huge money, work 12 hour days 7 days a week for 8 months at a time, yet they are always smiling, always obliging and do a great job. They deserve a couple of extra dollars.

Leaving myself open for flaming, but here goes.  I equate tipping in advance to a bribe.

[Heidi13]

50 minutes ago, Gwendy said:

Leaving myself open for flaming, but here goes.  I equate tipping in advance to a bribe.

 

No argument here. Providing money in advance of service being received is a bribe.

[ceeceeDee]

Everyone's entitled to their opinion. I don't see it as a bribe at all. I look at it as a tip for preparing the room to a very high standard and as a token of appreciation. I only give a very small amount as a gesture that their work is of a high standard and acknowledgement of the exemplary work they do. My decision and I will continue with the practice.

[mjkacmom]

13 hours ago, Gwendy said:

Leaving myself open for flaming, but here goes.  I equate tipping in advance to a bribe.

And it works!

[Heidi13]

On 6/6/2023 at 6:57 PM, ceeceeDee said:

Here in Australia, we do not have much of a tipping culture. However, we invariably give a small tip to our cabin stewards on day 1. They don't expect it, but really do appreciate it and we always get looked after really well. We also tip them again at the end of the cruise. We also tip waiters who give top service at the end of the cruise. These people don't earn huge money, work 12 hour days 7 days a week for 8 months at a time, yet they are always smiling, always obliging and do a great job. They deserve a couple of extra dollars.

 

Perhaps I can provide some insight into the practice, as someone who has worked on cruise ships.

 

The hotel crew may work up to 12 hr day for 7 days and some of the contracts are from 6 to 9 or 10 months for ratings. However, unlike shore based employment, you have no commute to/from work, you have no house to maintain, meals to cook, etc. When I left cruise ships working 12+ hrs per day to an 8 hr day on the coast, I had less free time due to travel, etc.

 

Landlubbers generally believe the hours are excessive, but from actual experience, my free time on live aboard ships was greater than working shorter shifts on a coastal vessel.

 

Wages - yes, based on western standards the wages are low. However, compared to the cost of living in their home countries, many of the ratings maintain a high standard of living. When I worked as Navigator, I made considerably more than the hotel ratings, but my standard of living was significantly less than most of the ratings.

 

When providing money in advance, the crew will always gracefully accept, showing appreciation. However, as a pax, you are not privy to some of the conversations taking place in the crew bar/rec room.

 

BTW - I've been working and cruising on ships for over 40 yrs, have never offered a bribe, and get the same, if not better service. The crew are happy to accept your money, but there are other factors which enhance a crew member's work life, which tends to improve service levels. Having managed crews for almost 30 years as a Master, I know a little about motivating crew to perform, and other factors are more important than money, especially on a live-aboard vessel.

[ldubs]

On 6/7/2023 at 4:12 PM, Gwendy said:

Leaving myself open for flaming, but here goes.  I equate tipping in advance to a bribe.

 

On 6/7/2023 at 5:08 PM, Heidi13 said:

 

No argument here. Providing money in advance of service being received is a bribe.

 

Yup, why else tip in advance other than as an inducement.  

 

 

[sanger727]

On 6/7/2023 at 9:11 PM, ceeceeDee said:

Everyone's entitled to their opinion. I don't see it as a bribe at all. I look at it as a tip for preparing the room to a very high standard and as a token of appreciation. I only give a very small amount as a gesture that their work is of a high standard and acknowledgement of the exemplary work they do. My decision and I will continue with the practice.

 

I'm really surprised to hear that from and Australian. Of course you are going to do whatever you feel good about.

 

Personally, I equate tipping in advance with waving a dollar bill to get a bartenders attention. Showy and little off putting. 

[ldubs]

On 6/7/2023 at 6:11 PM, ceeceeDee said:

Everyone's entitled to their opinion. I don't see it as a bribe at all. I look at it as a tip for preparing the room to a very high standard and as a token of appreciation. I only give a very small amount as a gesture that their work is of a high standard and acknowledgement of the exemplary work they do. My decision and I will continue with the practice.

 

I think the word "bribe" has a negative (criminal) connotation that does not apply in this case.  But really, by expressing appreciation for something that hasn't happened yet we are sending a pretty clear message.  While not a practice I feel a need to follow, it is no skin off my nose if someone wants to grease the palms as the expression goes.  😀  

[navybankerteacher]

On 6/8/2023 at 10:25 AM, Heidi13 said:

 

…

 

Landlubbers generally believe the hours are excessive, but from actual experience, my free time on live aboard ships was greater than working shorter shifts on a coastal vessel.

 

…

This is also largely the case in the Navy.  Sure, you have watches to stand (in and around regular day’s work), but the fact that you are rarely more than 150 feet from your bunk, have no commute, have no groceries to buy, etc. means that many of the little chores that gobble up a civilian’s time do not exist.

[navybankerteacher]

3 hours ago, ldubs said:

 

 

Yup, why else tip in advance other than as an inducement.  

 

 

Those who practice if acknowledge that it generally results in better service - and what is  an advance payment you make, in order to receive something you want in return, if it is not a bribe?